Chapter 22
Chapter Twenty-two
Mazzy
After a night of heavy, deep sleep, I woke to the floor creaking and whispers, and kept my eyes shut so I could eavesdrop.
“Mommy’s still sleeping.”
“Shhh, let’s not wake her up.”
“But she might miss me.”
“She’s probably dreaming about you.”
“Yeah. I bet she is. Do you dream about me too?”
“Of course. You’re in pretty much all my dreams. Last night, we were riding unicorns and eating cake.”
“Oooh, I love cake.”
“Same, sweetheart. Cake is the best.”
“We’re the same because you’re my dad.”
“That’s right. We have the same curls, and we both like cake, because I’m your dad and you’re my girl.”
“I like being your girl.”
“It’s my favorite too. Let’s go downstairs and talk about this some more while Mommy sleeps, all right?”
“Good idea. Mommy’s so tired.”
I cracked one eye to peek at them. Ben and Katty were standing at the foot of my bed, her hand tucked in his. Their curls were equally wild, and her glasses were slightly crooked.
My heart stuttered at how happy they both looked with each other.
Ben’s gaze landed on my face, catching me watching them. He shot me a crooked smirk, not giving me away, and returned his attention to Katty.
“That’s because Mommy works hard to take care of you and make her brain bigger,” he said as he bent to scoop her up. “Let’s go see what kind of trouble we can get into downstairs.”
After they left, I lay in bed for a while, ruminating.
I didn’t often get a chance to do this, so I took full advantage.
Of course, my mind was all over the place.
On school and work. On last night’s conversation with Ben.
All the changes over the past few weeks and how things would continue to evolve.
I wished my dad was here. He would have something wise to say…or at least be my sounding board while I freaked out. Instead, I had to sort through everything on my own.
Soon, I’d have less time with Katty, that was a fact.
I’d have to run every move I made and the steps I wanted to take for our future by Ben. The landscape of our future would be colored by Ben’s opinion.
As much as I welcomed him into our little world, it was a hard pill to swallow after doing it on my own for so long.
But catastrophizing wouldn’t get me anywhere. I could almost hear Aunt Barb telling me not to borrow trouble since I had enough of my own. So, taking a deep breath, I threw back the covers and got ready to face the day.
By the time I was dressed and ready, there were more unfamiliar voices drifting up the stairs. I crept down, unsure of what I was about to walk into, and immediately got thrown into the deep end when a toddler boy streaked by, followed by a giggling Katty.
Ben was right behind them, a big, goofy smile lighting up his face, then he spotted me and stopped midstride.
“Good morning, Mazzy-mazz.”
The toddler and Katty reversed course, shrieking as they barreled toward the living room.
“Morning, Ben.” I laughed, brushing my hair off my forehead. “Seems you have a visitor. Was that Jonah?”
“Yep. Shira, Bea, and Jonah showed up while you were in the shower. Bea brought muffins, so I let them in.” He slid an arm around my shoulders and gave a gentle squeeze, his body still warm from the chase.
“Come meet everyone. Katty’s already claimed Jonah as hers.
She’s pretty tickled to have a younger cousin. ”
“I wasn’t expecting this.” I should have been, though. Everywhere I turned, there was another of Ben’s friends or family members.
“Neither was I, but around here, you go with the flow.” He tipped my chin up with a knuckle, his grin softening. “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I’ll tell them to get the hell out if that’ll make you more comfortable. Or you can hide upstairs until they get the hint.”
I shook my head. “I’m good, but thank you for looking out for me.”
He opened his hand and cupped my cheek, his thumb brushing the corner of my mouth. “Always, baby. Now that I’m in your life, I’m your watchdog.”
I snorted a laugh. “Okay, puppy. Introduce me to everyone.”
He made a face, doing a terrible impression of a scowl. “Puppy? Come on. I’m at least a fully grown standard poodle.” Leaning in, he growled beside my ear, gnashing his teeth. “They invented those Beware of Dog signs because of me.”
“Oh, really? Should I be scared?”
“Nope.” He dipped his head and nipped lightly at the corner of my jaw, his stubble rasping my skin. “I only bite when you ask nicely.”
Was this flirting? It felt an awful lot like flirting. Then again, it had been a while. Ben could have just been being his usual crazy, friendly self.
“Ben…” I pressed my palm to his forehead, shoving him back with a laugh, “I don’t remember asking.”
“That was barely a graze. It doesn’t count.” Straightening, he grinned. “Now, stop fooling around and come meet everyone.”
Sunlight spilled across the kitchen counters, the smell of coffee and muffins thick in the air, as two women chatted like they were right at home. I hadn’t known what to expect of Ben’s best friend, but it wasn’t the lush, blue-haired woman who’d turned at the sound of my steps.
Bea was stunning, and when she hugged me, she smelled like vanilla and cranberry muffins and felt like a warm oven on a winter day.
“I’m so glad Ben stopped hiding you.” She pulled back to look at me, keeping a hold on my arms. “I see why he knocked you up at first sight, though. You’re so hot.”
I sputtered. “Have you seen yourself?”
Her lips were shiny with some kind of gloss, and when they curved into a grin, she became impossibly beautiful.
“I know, right? Luckily, my husband came with kids. We get to do lots and lots of practicing with no threat of getting knocked up for me.”
She turned me toward the other—very pregnant—woman perched on a barstool, nursing a mug of tea. “This is Shira. Her husband can’t stop getting her pregnant.”
Shira’s cheeks flushed rosy red. “This is only my second,” she protested.
“So far,” Bea teased.
Shira shook her head, smiling at me. It was so soft and sincere, my heart melted a little. “It’s so nice to meet you, Mazzy. Sorry for barging in like this.”
“Please don’t be sorry.” I gestured toward the giggles coming from the living room. “I think my daughter is in heaven with your son.”
“She’s so cute.” Shira smoothed her hand over her big, round belly.
There was something so incredibly serene about her, it made me want to gravitate toward her.
“Jonah spends most of his time with his dad and uncles, so he’s a little rough.
Maybe Katty will teach him to be gentle before his sister arrives. ”
Chagrined, I crinkled my nose. “I hate to burst your bubble, but my Katty is as rough and tumble as they come.”
Ben came up behind me, his hand finding a place on my hip with familiar ease. With the other, he reached around to place a steaming mug of coffee on the counter in front of me. “Her best friend is this little hooligan named Declan. He’s a bad influence.”
I twisted to look back at him. “He’s four. That automatically excludes him from hooligan status. And if anyone’s a bad influence, it’s Katty.”
“Hmph. I don’t agree.”
Even though he’d delivered my coffee, he hovered close, his chest brushing my back, his breath ruffling loose strands of my hair.
This man was more tactile than anyone I’d ever met.
I was beginning to realize how touch starved I’d become.
Sure, Katty gave me hugs all day long, but it had been years since an adult had wrapped their arms around me.
Around Ben, I’d never be short on hugs.
Or bites.
Or hand kisses.
The kids ran into the kitchen, their hands interlocked. Katty introduced me to “my cousin, Jonah,” then begged for more muffins. Before I could spring into action, Bea obliged, setting them up at the table with the baked goods, juice, and napkins.
“You have a really great village,” I told Ben.
“My village is now your village, Mazz.”
“It’s true,” Shira agreed. “I hope you don’t mind, but Ben gave me your number.
I’ll text you mine. Anything you need, I’m here for you.
And I hope we can keep getting the cousins together.
I didn’t have a family growing up. I really want that for Jonah and this one.
” She patted her belly, her striking green eyes twinkling.
“Growing up, it was only my dad and me. I would love that for Katty.”
Ben’s hand slipped higher, spreading out around my waist and the front of my stomach. “Don’t forget scary Aunt Barb and crazy cousin Kylie.”
“They weren’t around when I was growing up.” I drove my elbow into his side. Since he was made of granite, there wasn’t a chance he felt it, but I did it anyway. “And they really saved me. Let’s lay off the name-calling.”
His rumble vibrated my spine. “It’s all in good fun.
I bow down to Aunt Barb for all she’s done for you and Kat.
And without Kylie, we wouldn’t be here, so I’m glad she’s crazy.
” He squeezed my side, and I tried really hard not to be self-conscious since my body was about the opposite of granite. “Aren’t you?”
“Yeah, Ben. I am,” I said softly. “But don’t call her crazy.”
His chuckle brushed my ear. “All right, Mazz. Whatever you want.”
The way he said it shouldn’t have made my pulse skip. It had been a long time since a man had touched me like this, and I couldn’t remember ever being promised whatever I wanted. It was a powerful offer, even if he didn’t mean it.
And I was sure he didn’t mean it.
Bea reappeared, leaning on the counter beside Shira. “How out of his mind do you think Roman is right now?”
Shira’s eyes volleyed from me to Bea before landing on her hands. “I’m sure he’s fine.”
My brow pinched. “Is he home? Next door?”
She nodded. “He is, and he really is fine.”
Bea huffed. “I doubt that.”
“He’s still on punishment,” Ben muttered.
I elbowed him again—a little harder. “If he wants to come over, you should let him. We’re moving forward, right?” I turned to Shira. “Does he want to come over?”
She nodded eagerly. “He would love to.”
“Then please invite him. Ben doesn’t mind.”
“I don’t?” he asked, deadpan.
“Nope.” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Moving on, right?”
He glared down at me without a drop of heat, then sighed, resigned. “Fine. He’s off punishment, but, Shira, please remind him he’s on thin ice.”
She was already typing on her phone, but looked up with a smile. “Just added that to my text.”
“Good,” he gruffed. “As long as he remembers.”
It took all of thirty seconds before the front door swung open and a voice that sounded an awful lot like Ben’s called out to us. Ben sighed and took my hand, pulling me along with him to meet his brother.
The moment I laid eyes on Roman Wells, I stopped in my tracks. They really were identical. Same curls—though Roman’s were tamer—same height, build, face. There were differences too. Subtle, but if you looked, they were there.
Ben had a springiness to him, like he could barely contain the energy inside him, while Roman struck me as solidly grounded. Ben’s smile came on swift and hard, while Roman’s was a slow burn. Ben had a lump on his nose from multiple breaks, while Roman’s was crooked in a different way.
“Hi, Mazzy,” Roman greeted gently.
“Hi, Roman.” I walked up to him, peering at his features, and forgave myself. “I see why I mistook you for him.”
I hadn’t really known Ben then. All the differences I’d just cataloged had only become obvious after spending nearly every day with him over the past few weeks. I hadn’t seen any of that five years ago. That wasn’t my fault—or anyone’s.
A weight I’d been carrying lifted off my shoulders like it had never been there. Suddenly, I was free of half the guilt that had kept me in chains. It was so instant, my breath came in gasps. Then Ben slipped his broad hand around the back of my neck, steadying me with his firm hold.
Roman’s gaze bounced from his brother to me before he offered a soft smile.
“I know Ben told you how sorry I am, but I need to tell you myself. There are many things I’ve done I regret, but not stopping to listen to you that day hits the top of the list. It’s something I can never make right. I’ll always hate how I spoke to you and where that led.”
“Thank you, Roman.” I sucked in a shaky breath. “Let’s put it behind us, all right? Like you said, it’s not something we can change or make right. Dwelling on it will get us nowhere.”
Ben made a disgruntled sound. “You’re making me look bad with all this maturity and forgiveness.”
I slipped my arm around him to rub his back. “It’s a little easier for me. I’ve had Katty with me this whole time. You’ll get there when you get there.”
He groaned. “See? There you go again. You’re really making me look bad.”
Roman chuckled. “Don’t worry. I’m not expecting maturity out of you.”
Ben flipped him off. “Did your wife not remind you you’re on thin ice?”
Before anyone could answer, little feet pounded down the hall and Jonah launched himself at Roman’s legs. “Daddy!”
Roman scooped him up, nuzzling his cheek. “Hey, buddy. You smell like muffins.”
Katty stood to the side, tiny hands on her hips. “Jonah, that’s not your daddy—that’s mine—” She turned to Ben, then back to Roman, confusion melting into distress. Her bottom lip poked out, trembling.
I knew what was coming. “Katty, honey, this is Uncle Roman. He’s your dad’s twin. They look just alike.”
Her eyes filled instantly. “But…but…where’s my dad?”
This time, Ben didn’t panic at the sight of his crying daughter. Instead, he got down on his knees, allowing her to see him, and pulled her into his arms.
“Right here, sweetheart. I’m right here.”
He told her there was nothing to be afraid of. He was here and always would be. And he let her have her big feelings while he held her through them.
I rubbed my chest and looked away, finding Roman watching them. He must’ve felt my gaze, because he looked up and gave me a wobbly smile. Then he swiped at his eyes with the back of his hand.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
I gestured toward my daughter and her father. “Look at them. There’s nothing to be sorry about.”
And I meant it.
We couldn’t change how we’d gotten to this moment, but we were here, right where we were supposed to be.