Chapter 4
Growing Up
That was not entirely true, as Mary Bennet did miss her elder sister quite a bit, and Jane missed her mainly for the contrast her younger sister provided when in company.
A young man had come to Hertfordshire, several in fact, and Jane felt she shone all the more when compared to Lizzy.
While Lizzy was pretty, she was not as beautiful as Jane, and where Jane was everything demure and ladylike, Lizzy was impertinent and challenging.
In Jane’s mind, Lizzy was the perfect foil to highlight her own suitability as a potential wife for any of the gentlemen staying at Netherfield.
Unfortunately, there were no women amongst their party, and the ones leasing the estate were a group of gentlemen there for the sport.
The estate was close enough that they could ride to London for a day or two at will, though they participated in some of the local entertainments.
Jane had met one of the gentlemen at a dinner at Lucas Lodge a few nights ago.
He had called upon Longbourn once or twice but did not return, upsetting both Jane and her mother.
She hoped to run into him in Meryton but had so far been unable to do so, and she wished Lizzy were there to aid her.
The entire family was surprised a few days later when Jane and Mary received letters from Elizabeth in London.
These letters contained descriptions of an evening at the theatre and the unexpected revelation of a suitor.
Jane was initially shocked her sister had captured any suitor’s attention.
However, she learned he was a second son and an acquaintance of their uncle, so Jane dismissed him as someone of minor significance.
Mary, though, was delighted for her sister, as she knew how their mother and eldest sister spoke about Lizzy, especially when she was not there.
As Mary listened to her mother and Jane speak of Lizzy’s suitor that afternoon, she stored up all that was said and was determined to share it with her sister.
Mary knew Lizzy was aware of her mother’s opinion of her, but she did not know how Jane spoke of her when she was not there.
She hoped Lizzy might marry away from home and never have to return to Longbourn again.
If she did, perhaps Mary could go live with her elder sister or the Gardiners.
“You know, Mama, that this Mr. Darcy is a barrister. I imagine he is an older gentleman, perhaps as old as thirty, and I feel certain he wears spectacles and constantly has ink-stained fingers and sleeves. He will not have a handsome feature on his face, and in a few years, he will be stooped over and bent from all the time he spends at his desk reading the law,” Jane chortled.
Mrs. Bennet’s eyes widened, and she clasped her hands together in laughter. “Oh, Jane, my dear, you have such a vivid imagination! Imagine the love letters he will write! Each note will be a legal treatise, and Lizzy will swoon over clauses and the like.”
Jane chuckled softly, her eyes dancing with mocking. “Yes, Mama, and I am sure he will send her flowers with footnotes attached, explaining the botanical origins and their symbolic meanings.”
The two chuckled at such thoughts as none of these things would not bring either of them happiness in marriage.
Not that they cared about Elizabeth finding happiness in marriage—they would both be shocked to learn this courtship would progress to its natural end.
They were confident Elizabeth would somehow scare this suitor away, although perhaps an older, ugly barrister would be an ideal match for the chit.
As their laughter filled the room, Mary could not help but feel a twinge of …
shame, or was it sorrow? Deep down, she knew her mother’s words were laced with bitterness, and Jane’s jibes reflected the strained relationship between the sisters.
They revelled in their mocking dialogue, not caring if their words would deeply injure the sister who cared so much for others.
Finding she had enough, Mary slipped from the room and began to write a letter to her sister, apprising her of the state of things at Longbourn.
She expressed great pleasure in learning of her sister’s suitor and reported on the glee displayed by their eldest sister and mother over imagining the worst possible suitor for Elizabeth.
She did not ask for information about the gentleman but expressed her hope all would turn out well for her sister.
Realising the gentleman had only asked to call on her, she tempered her excitement but warned her sister to be cautious about what she said to her elder sister in the future.
This letter was met with uncertainty. “What do you think Mary means, Aunt?” Elizabeth asked after reading a portion of the letter out loud.
“I know you have always looked up to Jane as some kind of ideal, but you must realise that she simply does not care for you as you do her,” her aunt said, then sighed and turned to face her niece to speak seriously to her.
“Jane has always been selfish; have you never noticed she refused to visit the tenants with you or put herself out for anyone else? She has had a few suitors, yes, but none stayed any longer than it took for them to determine all she had to offer was her looks. Jane has few accomplishments and little to add to any conversation. Men tire of her before they learn much about her, and if a man is interested in just her beauty, your mother will surely frighten them away with her efforts at matchmaking. When you visited us before, did you ever witness Jane assisting with the children or engaging in selfless acts? I have seen Jane’s expressions when a man’s focus shifted from her to you, and she had no choice but to maintain a polite smile. ”
“While Jane may be a classical beauty with her blonde hair and willowy figure, many men are attracted to your own dark hair and green eyes. You are not as tall as your elder sister, but you have a pleasing figure men do appreciate.” She smiled as she watched her niece colour brightly at this.
“Why have I never noticed this?” Elizabeth asked.
“In part, because Jane has concealed this aspect of her nature from you. You’ve been preoccupied with your own activities and didn’t always notice Jane’s differences.
But I would also say it is because you were reluctant to acknowledge this facet of Jane’s character.
Your affection for her led you to rationalise aspects that did not align with your perception,” her aunt explained.
“I understand we have discussed one of your shortcomings, which is to mock the things around you, but another sign of immaturity is letting your biases shape your perception. Jane is your sister, so you have purposefully disregarded those elements.”
Elizabeth sighed. “I know I am just seventeen, aunt, and while I have been ‘out’ in Meryton society for two and a half years, I am afraid I still have much to learn.”
“You have been surrounded by those you have known all your life,” Mrs. Gardiner replied. “You have not had to look for shades in character because you knew them so well or, in the case of Jane, and perhaps even with your father, because you saw what you wanted to see.”
Feeling her entire body sag, she listened to her aunt’s words. “I have much to think about, Aunt, but I will take Mary’s advice and tell Jane nothing else about Mr. Darcy. Do you … do you think Mary is sincere? She seems so sad and so alone,” Elizabeth asked hesitantly.
“I do think Mary is sincere,” her aunt replied, patting her hand. “Like you, Mary has been overlooked by both of your parents, and have you not told me she does as much for the tenants as you? Is she not the one who will look after them while you are gone?”
“She does not do quite as much, as she cannot walk to visit the tenants furthest away,” Elizabeth replied.
“But, in the past, she has enlisted the aid of the steward and some of the servants to make the journey when she could not.” Suddenly, Elizabeth sighed, “Mary seems to want to come to London, to get away from Longbourn as I have. However, if both of us were to leave the estate, the tenants would suffer. Jane has no interest in caring for them, and despite my attempts to encourage Kitty and Lydia to help, neither of them is willing. The steward and Mrs. Hill may aid them, but they cannot do what Mary and I could.”
“Even if you no longer live at the estate, you can still sew items to send to Longbourn for Mrs. Hill to distribute,” Mrs. Gardiner encouraged.
“I have several things I need to complete to send back,” Elizabeth acknowledged. “One of the tenants expects a child before the end of the summer, and I brought the incomplete items with me. Will Uncle help me send them to Longbourn? It would be a rather large package if I were to do so.”
“I think we can aid you,” Mrs. Gardiner said. “Now, I have wanted to ask what you think about Mr. Darcy. He has called on you almost daily since we attended the theatre last week.”
Elizabeth blushed. “I have enjoyed his calls very much,” she said.
“I know you and Uncle are full of praise for him, and what I have learned of him makes me believe we are very well suited. We are both well-read, although his education is far better than mine, but that is because he is a man. We have much to say to each other, but even when we are silent, it is a comfortable silence.”
“You are young but not too young to be married,” her aunt said thoughtfully. “Can you imagine yourself married to him?”
“Aunt! I have known the gentleman for a week. How can I know?” Elizabeth protested. “You sound like Mama.”
“I am not suggesting you marry tomorrow, but I am asking if you can see yourself married to him,” she replied.
“That is different from proclaiming yourself married to the man because he called on you once.
Do you think he is someone you could grow to love and imagine sharing your life with?
Is it worth continuing to allow him to call on you?
“Oh,” Elizabeth said, visibly deflating.
She pondered the question for a minute before she answered, her voice soft and hesitant.
“I believe I could, Aunt. I admire him very much; he is a good man, very serious and very diligent in what he does. I could imagine myself loving him and sharing my life with him.” She smiled at her aunt. “Is that terrible?”
“Not at all, dear,” her aunt reassured her.
“I do not believe Mr. Darcy is one to make a declaration quickly; I imagine he will deliberate over it for a time before making a decision, but I think he admires you as well. Whether admiration will turn into something more remains to be seen, and neither should you fall in love with him because I have encouraged you to pursue the relationship. For the moment, it is good to know you believe you could. But do be careful, and allow his actions to guide you.”
“I will try, Aunt,” she said. “It is sometimes hard to convince one’s heart to act wisely.”
“It is,” her aunt agreed. Their conversation turned to the sewing Elizabeth was working on, and the two were ensconced in their work when the knocker sounded.
“Right on time,” Mrs. Gardiner said as she eyed her niece conspiratorially. The two attempted to contain their laughter when the housekeeper announced Mr. Darcy. When Darcy greeted them, Elizabeth’s eyes were still bright from her stifled laughter.
He could scarcely look away from her brilliant eyes lit with laughter.
His eyes locked with hers, and the two remained lost for several moments, lost in each other.
Finally, Mrs. Gardiner cleared her throat, breaking the spell.
“I heard your laughter as soon as I entered the door,” he teased. “Whatever was so funny?”
The two ladies burst into laughter. “I apologise, Mr. Darcy; I do not believe we can tell you what made us laugh,” Mrs. Gardiner told him. “How are you today?”
“I am well,” he answered, his eyes still on Elizabeth. “I was terribly sorry business kept me from visiting you yesterday.”
“You were missed from our parlour, sir,” Elizabeth replied quietly.
“My mother arrived in town yesterday with my sister,” he informed them. “Lady Anne would like Georgiana to study with a piano master for a month or two, and my brother, George, was glad to see them leave Pemberley for a time.”
“Does your brother not come to town for the season?” Mrs. Gardiner asked.
“He ought to; he needs to find a wife. I do realise thirty is not old, but it is time he marries and settles down so he might have an heir for Pemberley, or so my mother says. I am afraid he is more interested in having fun than creating his legacy,” Darcy complained.
“What does your mother say?” Elizabeth asked.
“She occasionally wishes I had been born first,” he replied, a half-hearted attempt at a tease.
“Our personalities are reversed—he is the ne’er do well who lives to have fun, while I am more serious, the staid one who does what is expected.
My brother and I do not always see eye to eye, and the longer he delays marriage, the more my mother pressures him to ‘settle down,’ a phrase he has come to despise. ”
“And what of you, sir,” Mrs. Gardiner asked. “How do you feel about the phrase?”
The question obviously flustered both Darcy and Elizabeth. However, after a moment, he attempted to force the flush away and looked directly into Elizabeth’s eyes to respond: “It is growing on me.”