CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT #2
I can’t keep the exhaled irritation from puffing out of me. “Why are we rehashing this? I’ve lived a life as long as that one since then. If you’re looking for questionable behavior, I’m sure there are plenty of examples from the last decade.”
“Indulge us,” Ryker coaxes, leisurely lifting his drink. “You blew your entire life up because …”
Despite his relaxed demeanor, it’s clear this isn’t a request. Somehow, it always comes back to this—someone with an upper hand.
“That asshole teacher was twenty-four. My sister was turning nineteen in July. It was inappropriate, but a month later, when she graduated, it wouldn’t have been.
Except to my parents, which meant everything to Eden.
And when it came down to the crime I was charged with, I was guilty.
He was a jerk to turn me in after what he did, but I’d made the decision to steal that car.
As I told the DA countless times, the other kids wouldn’t have stolen the car without me.
I wasn’t going to blow up someone else’s life to free myself. ”
“Noble. And reckless.” Axel takes his glasses off, setting them on the table and shutting the file.
It seems reading time is over. “That was intriguing. But it was your answer to why you wanted the job that really clinched it. Most people blow smoke up my ass. You told me you belonged here. And I believed you.” He scratches his neatly trimmed stubble, surveying me. “So, do you?”
I buy some time, sipping my Kraken and ginger ale, before reiterating his query. “Do I … belong here?”
“Yes.”
Am I being dismissed? Wouldn’t that be something? I fall for a man who makes this place feel more like home than ever, and they kick me out.
“At La Lune Noire?” I ask for clarity.
Axel spins his watch, eyeing it before his attention rises to me. “Is that how you interpreted the question? You think my concern is whether you belong at La Lune Nore?”
That’s a bit condescending.
Understanding dawns on me. “Do I belong in the penthouse? Uh … probably not. You said it. I’m from the country, and I’ve made some questionable decisions.
Reckless ones. I’m a phenomenal Noire employee.
I would challenge anyone who said otherwise.
But I won’t dispute that I’m not quite right for this elevation.
” All true, and yet I’m enraged. “The thing is, I didn’t ask for it. ”
“We know that,” Ryker assures me. “From what we’ve pieced together, you ended up here for the same reason we’d hired you. Without hesitation, you did what needed to be done when someone was in trouble, regardless of what crossing those lines meant for you.”
I don’t flinch at the fact that Maddox must’ve told them I killed Niko Makarov, but it disappoints me. Only because he swore he wouldn’t tell anyone. Otherwise, informing his brothers makes sense. And I wasn’t expecting an accolade from them, so that’s something.
Axel reads me anyway. “He didn’t tell us. In fact, his story about recent events is solid, but based on those involved, we deduced our own version.”
Relief floods me. “I see.”
He swills his whiskey, and even that move is regal and commanding. The whole room stills until the king finally speaks. “Which makes you perfect to be Maddox’s queen.”
My brows knit together. I’m rarely shocked by people, but this family has a way of throwing me off.
“That being said,” he goes on, “my doubts would be minimal about this, except you also fought hard to leave and were brought back due to unfortunate circumstances. So, I need to know where your head is at. You’re in this penthouse, attached to a man who is deeply in love—”
“No. Not love.” I raise a palm because things with Maddox were already zooming forward at warped speed. “We’re just … he hasn’t said that.”
Ryker tosses his dice onto the table, watching them roll.
“Men like us don’t say that to a woman who is a flight risk.
That doesn’t make it untrue. But you’re right.
Axel and I can’t speak for Maddox.” He peers at me.
“Let’s say, hypothetically, Maddox is in love with you.
Would you call your parents and tell them that you’re with him? That he’s your future?”
“Hypothetically?” I parrot.
“Yes.”
“I don’t think I can answer that hypothetically.
This is between Maddox and me.” I’m about to leave it at that, but it occurs to me how much these two mean to him.
The afternoon of the office-blow-job prank, he said he secretly idolized them, so I reveal more than I would.
“Maddox told me your mom viewed love as an action, not just a feeling. That struck me because … well, it’s wise.
Based on that, Maddox has already loved me better than anyone ever has.
He’s … I know my family doesn’t see it. Although I think my dad did. But Maddox is the best person I know.”
I finish my drink and gather my thoughts.
“My family is difficult, but they’re mine.
Cutting them out of my life isn’t something I can do on a whim.
It would be like deciding to cut off a leg that wasn’t working well.
Doing so wouldn’t mean you could run. In fact, it would haunt you.
My family would be the phantom ache of what I once had or hoped for, and I …
I’m not built that way. I don’t know what that means, but I won’t—”
“You’re loyal,” Axel says.
Despite the disappointed voice of my mother disputing that observation in my head, I claim it. “I believe I am.”
“So, you won’t walk away from Maddox either?” he surmises.
My gut stirs at the prospect, and the answer pops out of my mouth. “No, but I …”
“If you’re with Maddox, you aren’t cutting your family off.
Their disapproval or animosity regarding your life is them choosing not to work as well as they should.
” Ryker scoops up his dice, jostles them in his palm, and pockets them.
“It’s already the original analogy you described, except you’d have someone who loves you better than anyone else has. ”
The sweetness of them fighting for Maddox burrows into me. It’s their devotion to one another that elevates them to the unstoppable kings of the underworld, even more than their La Lune Noire empire. Power often destroys relationships. It seems to strengthen theirs.
Of course, sweet is the last term I’d assign to Axel’s next comment.
“As a Noire queen, you and your family will be declared as protected, so—”
“That sounds like an ultimatum. Isn’t that already the case for me as an employee?”
He cocks an eyebrow in warning. “For you? Yes, to a degree, though it’s far from the untouchable class you’d reap as queen. But your family? No.”
I scoff at that, unfazed by the Noire dictatorship. “You’re bribing me to choose Maddox?”
“We’re telling you how our world works. You wanted to be a part of it, and you are. You told me you belong.” He pauses there, ensuring he has my attention. “There are rules and codes with these organizations. We’re simply informing you.”
Or threatening me? Is this on behalf of Maddox? No, he’d never go through them. He said we were inevitable, and there was a sinister edge to his tone that frustrated me, but it still felt romantic. Like he was fighting for me.
“I guess based on my past choices, you’d assume that if it were to shield my family from something, I’d agree without a second thought. But in those instances, the choices to take the consequence only affected me.”
“How is this different?” Ryker asks, and the subtlest glint of hope twinkles in his icy-blue eyes. He’s invested, probably as proxy for Mercy, though I’m not sure what he’s hoping for.
“Because Maddox deserves someone who wants him for him, separate from La Lune Noire or his empire or the power. That’s never been a factor for me.
” I shake my head. “That’s not true; it was a deterrent.
I don’t respond in kind to manipulation, regardless of whether it’s coming from the penthouse or a dirt road. ”
I stand up, and they stay silent, which I appreciate. “If I choose to be with Maddox and become part of his world, it will be because I can’t bear to be without him. Not because you waved protection in front of me.”
On that final word, the door swings open, and Maddox appears with a huge grin when he sees me. “There’s my girl.” His gaze darts to his brothers, and his features turn to granite. “What the fuck is this?”
Axel rises. “We were just chatting—”
“You never fucking just chat,” Maddox snaps, tromping over to me and grabbing my hand. “Love you both, but you’re not to talk to her alone until I know you’re only making her feel—”
“Maddox.”
All it takes for this menacing six-foot-five man to stop his angry rant is his name on my lips, and that realization alone untangles a lifetime of inner turmoil inside me. Chants of unlovable and too much and not enough dissipate with the simple ability to be his tranquility.
“We just had a drink.” My fingers glide over his cheek, as if they have a mind of their own and can’t resist seeing if they wield the same power as my voice. “They were good. I needed a quieter atmosphere for a little while, and they helped.”
He appears soothed, but then he morphs into a Neanderthal and throws me over his shoulder.
“Really?” I hiss, smacking his back.
“Really.” He chuckles, storming for the door. “We’ve got places to be, and you tend to dig your heels in.”
“Mad,” Ryker calls out, waiting for Maddox to grant him his attention. “She’s gold. Don’t fuck this up.”
My heart jumps to my throat.
“That she is,” Maddox sings, the pride in his declaration unmistakable.
And Axel’s sapphire gaze hitches to mine. “Welcome to the family, Tessa.”
I misread everything they were saying. The same qualities my family has always despised seem to be the very ones they embrace.
So much has changed since I first pleaded for a La Lune Noire position, and yet nothing has.
I told them I belonged all those years ago, and now that I have every reason to refute it, they’re telling me I was right.