29. Ivy
Chapter 29
Ivy
T he truck bounces over a pothole, and my heart nearly leaps out of my chest. Holt’s arm tightens around my shoulders, pulling me closer. Or maybe it’s Wyatt’s. It’s hard to tell when I’m wedged between the two of them, squeezed so tight I can barely breathe. Though that might have more to do with the anxiety clawing at my insides than the actual lack of space.
“Whoa there, CG,” Holt teases, his lips brushing my ear. “Afraid we’re gonna lose you on the way into town?”
I force a laugh, trying to ignore the way my stomach is churning. “Just not used to being the filling in a mountain man sandwich.”
Holt smirks, his hand tightening on my thigh. “Pretty sure you’ve had plenty of practice, baby.”
Wyatt chuckles on my other side, his voice a low rumble. “Yeah, I’d say you’re more than qualified at this point.” He nudges my leg with his knee, sending a jolt through me. “Hell, if there was an Olympic event for it, you’d be bringing home the gold.”
I huff, rolling my eyes, but my face is burning. “Glad to know I’m excelling at something.”
Holt’s fingers brush my wrist, featherlight, almost teasing. “We’re damn proud.”
I glance at Wyatt, his grin as wide as ever, and then at Holt, who’s watching me with those intense, blue eyes. They’ve been unusually affectionate the whole car ride.
I mean, they’re usually touching me in some way, but it’s typically to get me out of my clothes. Today, though, their touches are softer, more lingering—brushes of their fingers against my arm, a hand gently resting on my knee, the kind of intimate contact that doesn’t rush toward the physical but settles in a way that feels…different. It’s tender, almost like they’re trying to reassure me that it’s not just about sex. That maybe they want more than that.
I lean back against the seat, trying to play it cool. “I guess I’m tougher than I look.”
“Yeah, you are,” Holt says, his hand sliding down to squeeze mine. The warmth of it is comforting and terrifying all at once. Especially now, when I feel like I’m about to unravel.
I stare out the window, the scenery a blur of trees and snow. The more they act like this, the worse I feel about what I’m hiding. I’m still not sure where I stand with them, not when everything feels so uncertain. I’m not even sure where I stand with myself.
Wyatt’s voice pulls me back to the moment. “So, about that date.”
I blink at him, caught off guard. “Date?”
“Yes, date.” Holt clarifies, his tone playful. “We told you we wanted to take you out for real when the roads cleared, CG. Roads are clear now.”
I open my mouth to respond, but nothing comes out. My brain is too preoccupied with the real reason I’m tagging along to town—one I can’t exactly share with them. Not yet. “Uh...”
Wyatt chuckles, ruffling my hair. “Relax, City Girl. We’re not proposing or anything.”
I manage a weak smile, my heart pounding. “I’ll...think about it?”
“Good enough for me,” Wyatt says, but I catch a flicker of something in his eyes. Doubt, maybe. Uncertainty. Holt, on the other hand, looks almost...pained.
Guilt twists in my gut. I want to tell them, to explain why I’m so distracted, but I can’t. Not until I know for sure. Not until I know what this means for all of us.
Holt shifts beside me, draping his arm across the back of the seat. “You’re not getting cold feet already, are you?”
“Definitely not cold,” I say, glancing pointedly at the way I’m wedged between them. My voice is light, but my heart isn’t in it. They have to notice how distracted I am, how tense. I just hope they’ll understand once I know more myself.
The truck hits another bump, and I clutch at the dashboard. I can’t remember the last time I was this nervous. Okay, that’s a lie. I felt like this yesterday too. And the day before that. And every day since I realized that this extended illness might not be an illness at all.
My hand drifts to my stomach. It’s probably nothing. Just stress. I have been under a lot of it lately.
Wyatt and Holt are bickering about who gets to drive home, their voices a comforting hum. I try to focus on them, on anything but the possibilities racing through my mind. What if it’s not stress? What if it’s...something else?
I take a deep breath as we reach the edge of town, trying to calm the storm inside me. Just a little longer, and I’ll know for sure.
The truck isn’t even fully stopped when I push the door open, mumbling something about meeting them back here in a little while. I don’t look back to see their reactions. I can’t.
My heart’s racing so fast I feel lightheaded. There’s a good chance my entire world’s about to change.
The cold air hits me like a slap as I make a beeline for the pharmacy. My boots slip on the icy sidewalk, but I keep moving, weaving through the small-town crowd like a woman on a mission. Which, I guess, I am.
I shove the door open and duck inside, my breath coming in quick, panicked bursts. The store is warm and bright, and I keep my head down, hoping no one recognizes me. I mean, I doubt they’ll realize I’m Ivy Blake. But they might realize I’m the girl staying with Hank, Holt, and Wyatt.
The last thing I need is to be stopped for small talk when I’m about to have a breakdown in the middle of the family planning aisle.
My hands shake as I reach for the pregnancy tests, grabbing a couple of different brands just to be safe. The boxes feel like they weigh a thousand pounds, and I clutch them to my chest, praying I’m just overreacting. But the nagging dread in the pit of my stomach tells me I’m not.
I’m so focused on keeping it together that I don’t notice the girl in front of me until I slam right into her. The impact knocks the boxes out of my hands. I watch them hit the floor before I even process what’s happening. When I finally do, my heart skips a beat as I look up into a pair of bright eyes.
“Oh my God!” Lily’s face lights up, and she flashes me a wide grin. “Ivy!”
I force a smile, trying to hide my unease. “Hey, Lily. Didn’t see you there.”
She quickly scoops them up, her movements a little too fast, too eager. When she looks at the tests in my hands, her expression shifts. Her eyes widen, lingering on the boxes for a moment too long before her mouth falls open.
Lily’s grin only widens. “Oh my God, I knew you looked familiar! I knew something was up! You’ve been staying up at the ranch, hanging out with Holt and all the guys—everyone's been talking about it, but nobody really knows what’s going on.” She lowers her voice slightly, as if we’re sharing a secret, though it’s anything but. “And now this ?”
“Lily…”
“Oh, this is so exciting. I knew it. I knew I recognized you. I mean, I’ve seen your face in so many tabloids, but I couldn’t place it at first.”
“Lily…”
Once the boxes are back in place, Lily stands up and looks me over with a grin that doesn’t seem to be fading anytime soon. “I can’t believe it’s really you! You’re THE Ivy Blake.”
No! No, no, no, no. No!
The words hit me like a punch to the gut. I’m suddenly aware of everyone around us, of how exposed I am. I glance around, expecting to see people staring, but no one seems to notice. Yet.
Her tone makes my skin prickle. She’s not just excited, she’s hungry for this gossip. “Please don’t tell anyone,” I mutter, my voice shaky, but she doesn't seem to be listening.
Her eyes gleam with intrigue. “It’s really you. I can’t believe it.”
“Please,” I beg, clutching the tests to my chest. “You have to promise you won’t say anything. Not to your dad. Not to anyone.”
She hesitates, and I can see the wheels turning in her head. Finally, she nods. “Okay. I promise.”
Relief washes over me, but it’s short-lived. I’m not convinced she’ll keep my secret, not with how eager she looks. I give her a hurried goodbye and rush toward the front of the store.
My heart races as I pay for the tests, fumbling with the cash, my hands so unsteady I’m surprised I don’t drop everything again.
I clutch the bag like a lifeline as I leave the store, my mind spinning with the possible fallout. If one person knows, it’s only a matter of time before everyone does. My family. The press. Holt and Wyatt. I can’t breathe, can’t think, can’t...
I stop in the middle of the sidewalk, forcing myself to slow down. It’s just one girl. One very excited, very intrigued girl. Maybe she’ll keep her word. Fuck, I hope so, because I have much bigger things to worry about right now.
I take a deep breath, trying to calm the storm inside me. I need to focus, need to find a place where I can be alone. Where I can finally find out the truth.
The coffee shop is just down the street, and I head toward it, my legs shaky, my heart still pounding. I don’t know what I’ll do if the test is positive. I don’t know how I’ll tell Holt and Wyatt.
But I have to know.
I push past a couple of people in line, avoiding eye contact as I make my way to the back. The bathroom is small and dimly lit, but it’s private, and right now that’s all I care about. I lock the door behind me and lean against it, my breath coming in shallow, panicked bursts.
The bag crinkles in my grip, and I force myself to move, to do this before I lose my nerve. I’m shaking so hard I can barely open the boxes, the instructions a blur as I try to focus.
The first test feels like a ticking time bomb in my hand. I set it down on the edge of the sink, all but praying for a negative result. Praying that I’m just overreacting, that I can go back to Holt and Wyatt and Hank and pretend everything’s normal.
But when I look at it, the result is clear. Positive. My stomach drops, and I feel like I’m going to be sick. It’s just one test. It could be wrong. I tear open another box, my hope slipping away with every second that ticks by.
The second test is positive too. I’m starting to feel dizzy, the weight of reality crashing over me. I take a third test, my hands trembling so badly I almost drop it. I already know what it will say, but I have to be sure. I have to know.
Positive. Every last one of them.
I sink to the floor, my back against the door. The tests are scattered around me. I’m pregnant. Pregnant. The word echoes in my mind, over and over, until it doesn’t even feel real anymore.
What am I going to do? What are they going to say? I picture Wyatt’s easygoing smile, Holt’s confident grin. How will they react when they find out? Will they want this? Will they want me?
My thoughts are a chaotic swirl, and I can’t seem to catch my breath. I’m scared. I’m confused. I’m alone in a way I haven’t been since I came here.
I take a deep breath, then another, the panic slowly giving way to a grim determination. I don’t know how I’ll do this, but I know I have to. I know I can’t keep running.
I pick up the tests, stuffing them back into the bag with shaky hands. My future feels like a giant question mark, but there’s no avoiding it now.
I unlock the door and step back into the coffee shop, my heart still heavy, but my path clear.