Chapter 12
“Heads-up. He’s in a mood tonight,”my friend, Faith, says as she pushes through the swinging door into the communal kitchen.
“When isn’t he in a mood? The real question is, which one? A superior pain in the ass looking down on everyone? The touchy-feely used car salesman in a desolate town bringing all the ‘Hey there little lady’ energy?” I ask as I wipe my hands on the hand towel over my shoulder and drain the sink.
If my family saw me like this, they’d think we’d been sucked into another dimension. Nikoletta Maksimova Romanoff, the only daughter of Maksim Ivanovich Romanoff, head of the single most powerful Bratva family in Russia, and New York City—for now—running the kitchen in a commune for a crew of thirty.
For all I know, my brother Nikolaj managed to snag the power from our father’s clutches, but I doubt it. Not that I will know either way; we only have one television in the main house and it’s not like mafia business is reported on the six o’clock news.
No one knows my true identity here, or my history, other than Faith, and it took me six months to trust her with my secrets. And she had to trust me with hers first.
“That’s the thing,” she says with a quick glance. “I can’t quite figure it out.”
The way she wrings her hands tells me it is more than just a mood and at some point soon, things will take a turn with our new leader.
Fuck. “You, Lexi, and Alex stay close to me at all times then, got it?”
Her eyes meet mine, then drop to where I grip the knife I’ve just finished drying more like a weapon than a tool. She smiles, and her shoulders relax a fraction. “Got it. I’ll help you dry the dishes and get them put away so we can get upstairs. I know they’re sleeping and should be fine, but I don’t know… I just don’t have a good feeling. I don’t want to be away from them.”
I hand her a clean dish towel and we settle in to dry the mountain of dishes I’ve just washed. “Agreed.”
When I met her a little over a year ago, my hair was a finger-brushed mess, my dress wrinkled with a tear in the skirt, and my eyes puffy and red from angry tears I’d spent a whole day struggling to control. What little cash I’d had got me out of the city before hitchhiking my way into Northern New York, where I planned to lay low until I could figure out my next move.
Anything that had me using my legal name in any capacity would lead my family straight to me. My brother Nikolaj being the best-case scenario, my half brother Vlad and my father, the absolute worst-case scenario.
As for Konstantin… I may straight cut his dick clean off if I see him again. Not sure what kind of scenario it qualifies as, other than a bloody one.
Almost a year and a half has passed since Faith spotted me coming out of the bathroom at the general store. Her eyes met mine and saw too much. When I hurried out, she followed me and convinced me to come here. She’d only been here for a month at that point, and was still under the illusion that this was a safe place.
For a time we both were.
She moved in next to me and propped her head on my shoulder. “Have I told you how grateful I am that you’re here? I don’t know what I would have done without you.”
Affection like hers is new to me, but after a time, I’ve gotten used to it, and even look forward to it. She has my back. I have hers. I’ve never had that with anyone else in my whole life. Because of her, I’ve had room to breathe and time in private to feel all the hurt and betrayal from the one person I held above all others.
I smile and rest my head against hers. With her, I don’t have to be the Bratva princess I’d been born to be. Instead, I embrace being blissfully normal, even when I know it can only be temporary. “Every day. But I’m the one who should be grateful; it’s you who saved me.” They are words I never could have imagined saying to anyone. They expose my vulnerability which in my world is weakness. Only, in our time together, we’ve seen each other at our worst, our most vulnerable, and if I didn’t have her, I really don’t know what I would have done.
I’ve had friends before, but all of them were carefully vetted, even Nadia, before getting access to me. They all had to have valuable connections for my father.
But Faith, she comes from different roots entirely. She ran away from home, from a father and brother who raped her repeatedly. She had a boyfriend at the time, one she had been intimate with because she just wanted to know what it felt like to be touched by someone who loved her. Then the unthinkable happened. She got pregnant and she didn’t know which one was the father. Fearing her father or brother would do something to harm the pregnancy, or even kill her, she ran.
But not before telling her boyfriend she was pregnant. And he delivered the final blow to Faith’s heart by questioning if the baby was even his.
Every man in her life has been a fucking disappointment. Something I understand all too well.
Despite our completely different lives, if Vlad had escalated just a bit more, if my virginity hadn’t been as valuable as it was, I could have easily been her.
A country bumpkin to the core, Faith speaks softly, works hard, and finds happiness in the simple things despite her traumatic childhood. She gave me a crash course on cooking so I could be useful since everyone pulls their weight here. In return, I taught her how to wield a knife, ensuring she’ll never be vulnerable again.
We’ve both been easy targets for the last time.
When Konstantin reached for me in the hail of gunfire, almost a year and half ago, promising me we would leave this whole life if I just took his hand, I desperately wanted to take it. If my father hadn’t chosen that moment to reveal their old rivalry for my mother, I would have. In doing so, I would have unknowingly committed myself to a lifetime of lies and deceit from the one person I loved and trusted most. Whose deception had the power to destroy me.
God, I chose to give my virginity to him. Begged him to take it, even. My father, my half brother, and Konstantin had reduced me to easy prey and a fool.
Festering anger simmers deep inside me at the thought of seeing Konstantin again. His betrayal cuts deepest. After finding out I was nothing more than a replacement for my mother of all people. I’ve had time to process and gain perspective, but my scathing hot temper will not be tamed.
If Konstantin ever tries to touch me again, I’ll put a knife in the son of a bitch myself.
“Help!”
The rapid beating on our bedroom door shakes the doorframe and has me launching out of bed to answer it before the babies wake up. With a swift yank, I wrench it open and slap my hand over the mouth on the other side.
It takes my eyes a minute to adjust, before I recognize Regan’s wide-eyed frantic eyes. Curling my fingers around her arm, I drag her in the room. Feeling around the base, I flick on the small lamp on the dresser next to the door so I can see her.
“What the hell happened?” I say in a harsh whisper to try to keep from waking Alex and Lexi.
Lexi lets out a whimper and shoots a fist into the air, but Faith steps in and gently rocks the crib the babies share until Lexi lets out a little shuddering breath. In a matter of seconds, Faith has her settled back into sleep with her arms flung back and her fists on either side of her head.
“Elij—a—ah.” Tears spill over her eyelids, trailing down her cheeks as gulping sobs take over.
Looking her over from head to toe, I spot a tear on the side of her nightgown, the seam torn clean up to her waist. My stomach bottoms out. Every muscle locks tight, rage igniting the urge to seek retribution.
“Hey,” I whisper, mustering a sense of calm I don’t feel as I cup her cheeks and tip her face up to look at me. “What happened?”
“He—he…” She blows out a breath and sucks in another. She curls in on herself, doing everything possible to make herself smaller. “He came into my room. W-when I woke up, he was o-o-ver me.”
Blood running cold, I shoot a look at Faith. This is the mood she couldn’t pinpoint. The creep grew bolder by the day and now no one is safe.
I thought we at least had a few weeks before he forced my hand. Time to at least formulate a plan between all of us. But time has run out and I have only one way out.
I can protect them—free them even—I just have to be willing to climb back into my cage.
“How far did he go, Regan?”
She dissolves into a fit of sobs once again. Wrapping her in my arms, I gently stroke her hair.
“Shhhh, you’re safe now.” Mussed strands cling to her clammy skin. Peeling them away, my hand freezes as my eyes land on the red marks around her neck. “That fucker!”
“I’m s-sc-ared,” she chokes out.
I turn her face to mine and wipe away her tears with a tissue. “Did he rape you?” I fight to keep my words calm while my blood blazes a trail of fury through my veins.
She opens her mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Her gaze volleys between us as she nods and confirms the worst.
Clinging to me, she weeps uncontrollably for who knows how long, her face buried against my shoulder muffling the worst of the sound. Her body shakes violently until she finally slumps against me.
She clutches at my nightgown then and peers up at me with swollen, red-rimmed eyes. “I need to shower. I-I need to get the feeling of him off me—out of me—but I’m too scared to go out there.”
I take her hand in mine and give her a reassuring squeeze. “I’ll take you.”
“Nikoletta!” Faith snaps in a harsh whisper.
“What?”
“You can’t. What if he tries something with you?”
I shrug. “I’ll gut him.”
“And if he comes to our room?”
I hold Faith’s stare. “Then you’ll gut him.”
Her mouth falls open and a few seconds later snaps shut.
Crossing the room, I take her shoulders in my hands. “You know how to use that knife. I taught you. And you would never let anything happen to those babies.”
She glances down at their peaceful faces and her gaze softens. She bites her lip, turns back to me, squares her shoulders, and nods.
Motherhood will drive her. She’s not that helpless teenage girl at the mercy of her father and brother anymore. I made sure of it. She’s become a powerful mother which means Elijah doesn’t stand a chance. “When we leave, you’re going to lock this door and don’t open it until we come back.”
“And tomorrow? What will we do tomorrow?”
My lips curve into a smile of reassurance while I fill with cold dread. “I’m going to activate reinforcements.” By tomorrow night, I’ll face Konstantin once again. There is no doubt in my mind.
“How will I protect them while you’re in town? What if he?—”
“Elijah’s coming with me.”