Chapter 8
CHAPTER EIGHT
RORY
“Good morning,” Diesel said with amusement as I stumbled into Skeeter’s kitchen the next morning. The guys had all gone home, but I’d stayed and continued drinking.
My pussy hurt, I was slightly hungover, and I badly needed coffee.
“Morning,” I yawned as Skeeter appeared in front of me. He took my shoulders and steered me to the table, gently pushing me down into the seat before turning to the coffee pot to pour one for me.
“I’m going to drop you at home. We’ve got some shooting practice to get in this morning before the boss wakes up and makes us too busy,” he grunted, bringing the coffee over and placing it in front of me.
“Stay away from the Shed today. Lie around that fancy house and sit on Holloway’s face or something. ”
“Don’t mind if I do,” I joked, sipping the coffee and groaning. “So good.”
His phone rang and he huffed, pressing it to his ear and leaving the room.
“How are you?” Diesel asked as he sat opposite me, not seeming concerned about whoever had called Skeeter.
“Good, actually. You? I feel like I haven't seen you a lot lately,” I answered, making him cringe.
“Yeah, I’ve been busy. I’ve been meaning to check in.”
“You got a gun for me yet? I can handle your boss, if you want?” I joked, earning a flat look in return.
“You’re not funny. I asked Slash about it last night, actually.”
“You need his permission?” I scoffed, and he rolled his eyes.
“Yes. He likes to know where his guns are going. Surprisingly, he was all for it,” he said with a frown of confusion, just as Skeeter appeared.
“They’re besties now, you haven’t heard? They basically sat in each other’s pockets last night while he was here,” he stated with annoyance, letting out a sigh. “That was Slash. He got a lead on that guy that fucked us over. I’ll have to skip the range today, sorry.”
“All good. Want me to take Donovan? Can put a few different guns in her hand to see what works for her. Slash approved her having one,” Diesel explained, and Skeeter eyed me for a second.
“I intended on teaching you, but can I trust you to listen to D? He’s a good shot and has way more patience than me. If you want to learn to shoot properly—”
“I can go?” I asked with surprise, glancing at Diesel. “You’ll teach me?”
“I promised we’d train you, so yes. I can take my time going over multiple guns with you to find what you’re comfortable with. The range has loads we can use and test out if you don’t want to touch ours,” he confirmed, and Skeeter nodded.
“It’s a good idea, actually. If you’re happy to teach her, I’ll head to the Shed now. Lock up when you leave.” He walked over and leaned down to kiss me, his voice low. “No rogue bullshit. Take it seriously, guns aren’t toys.”
“I know. I’ll listen to him,” I grumbled, hating that he was treating me like a child.
What did he think I was going to do? Wave it around and fire in all directions for fun? Only an idiot would do that.
“Don’t point it at anything you don’t intend on shooting.”
“You wave yours around all the time.”
“I intend on shooting,” he grunted, grabbing his keys and saying something in Diesel’s ear that I couldn’t hear before leaving.
“This actually works out well. I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something,” Diesel said, his voice sounding hesitant.
“What is it?”
“We’ll talk in the truck,” he answered, waiting for me to finish my coffee in silence. He was twitchy, not seeming comfortable with telling me, and I almost told him not to worry about it when we were finally in the truck and on the road.
He looked ready to throw up.
“Sasha meant everything to me. Still does,” he said randomly after we’d been driving for a few minutes, sparking up two cigarettes before handing me one and rolling his window down. “I don’t like talking about this, but I need you to really understand the world you’ve been pulled into.”
“D—”
“Let me talk,” he bit out, the pain and anger flaring to life in his words.
“She was my first everything, and she was also going to be my last. We had it all planned out, you know? The house we wanted, the wedding, kids, all of it. We were only kids ourselves, but we’d grown up too fast. We found peace in one another that we’d never had before. ”
He swallowed, taking a long drag of his cigarette as he got lost in his own thoughts. I didn’t speak, knowing he needed a minute to think.
“I was a thirteen-year-old ice addict when the Psychos found me. I only managed to stay sober because I met Sasha not long after. It was rough, and I said a lot of things I could never take back, but she let me get it all out and comforted me when I needed it. I never really believed in love at first sight until her,” he said softly, a small smile tugging at his mouth.
“She’d have liked you. She was sassy, brave, and liked to give the guys shit. ”
“Did Savage like her?” I asked carefully, surprise flashing in his eyes as he glanced at me.
“Skeet told you about Savage?”
“He said Savage raised him and led the Psychos. I don’t know a lot.”
“Savage hated her,” he said sharply, his eyes on the road ahead. “He hated women in general, to be honest. They were only good for fucking. Sasha fought him at every turn, no matter what I said to her.”
“Did he hurt her?”
He smoked quietly for a moment, and I was starting to think he wasn’t going to answer when he did.
“She was seventeen when he snapped,” he said, his voice cracking. “We were at the Shed, and Sasha got in his face about something dumb again. She never listened when I said he’d hurt her. He punched her so hard I heard her nose crack.”
“We don’t have to talk about it,” I insisted, but he shook his head.
“We do. You and Sasha are so similar, and I know Slash isn’t Savage, but I need you to take it seriously when Skeet and I tell you to shut your mouth. I’m sorry if this conversation triggers you or something, but you need to hear it.”
My blood ran cold, knowing where this was going, and I reached out to touch his arm for comfort. He pulled back, not being able to look at me, so I sat back properly and let him talk.
“Savage dragged her into the cage by her hair, blood going everywhere from her nose. I knew what he was going to do before he did it, and I tried to stop it, but other members held me back and forced me to watch as he beat and raped her. When he was done, someone else took his place and it started all over again. I don’t know how long it went on for.
I couldn’t stop it, I’ve never felt so helpless in my entire life.
I still can’t tell if the screams that keep me awake at night are memories of hers or mine.
I remember realizing at one point that the only person screaming was me and she’d gone quiet, her mind shutting down to protect her from the assault.
” A tear leaked from the corner of his eye and I hesitated before reaching out again, jerking back when he slapped my hand away with a snarl. “Don’t fucking touch me.”
“Sorry. I—”
“You want to help me?” he scoffed, shaking his head slightly. “Then do as you’re told when we tell you to back down. I can’t watch you go through something like that. I barely made it the last time.”
“What happened to her?” I asked weakly, his hands tightening on the steering wheel.
“They let me take her home. She didn’t speak for days.
I wasn’t even sure if she knew I was there when I got her home and cleaned her up.
Her face was a mess of blood and bruises, and I had no idea how to help her when I saw how badly she was bleeding between her legs.
I was only eighteen. I couldn’t take her to get help or we’d both end up dead, so I had to clean her up by myself.
Skeet managed to get some antibiotics for me, and I just had to pray she didn’t have severe internal tearing. ”
“Savage didn’t have her killed?”
“He knew he didn’t have to waste his time.
It took a couple of months, I thought she was getting better, but I came home one day to find her with her wrists slit.
The bathroom floor was covered in blood.
She must have done it the second I left that morning.
I can still feel how cold and stiff she was.
Nothing prepares you for the type of silence that fills a home when you lose someone like that.
It’s actually pretty loud.” He blindly reached over, taking my hand and giving it a squeeze.
“I know Slash isn’t going to do that to you, he’s not that kind of man.
Some of the Psychos though? They’d do it.
Sure, we can go after them and take them out, but it won’t take back what happened.
You’re so strong, and you’ve been through that kind of violation before, but this?
I don’t think even the strongest could survive that.
You’re mingling with monsters, Donovan. I need you to understand that sometimes not even we can save you. Trust me.”
“Did Skeet or Slash—”
“They didn’t touch her,” he said quickly, holding my hand tighter. “Skeet was barely in high school then. They saw it though, which is why Skeet is so firm on you.”
“I’m so sorry,” I said gently, putting my other hand on top of his.
“Thanks. I wish you could’ve met her. You two would’ve been good friends, I think,” he said warmly, pulling his hand away to put it back on the steering wheel.
“You can tell me stories about her whenever you want,” I offered, his gaze flicking over to me.
“I’d like that.”
I smiled at him and went to speak, but the truck lurched forward as we were hit from behind, his attention going to the rearview mirror.
“Keep your head down. We’ve got company.”
“I noticed,” I said dryly, trying to glance back but he grabbed the back of my neck and tugged me down slightly.
“Listen. To. Me,” he bit out, his grip loosening but not leaving me as his thumb stroked the nape of my neck. “Please.”
“I can try and shoot at them. I don't have to be a good shot, right?”