Chapter 15
EILISH
This has gone from bad to worse.
After half an hour of anxiously waiting for Gavan to somehow magically find me and exact his punishment on me for saying no to him, I’m at the bar getting another round of drinks none of us need in the slightest when a hand lands heavily on my arm.
When I turn, I physically recoil. My stomach knots, and my entire body goes numb.
“Been a while, Eilish.”
No. No .
I haven’t actually talked to or even seen Brooks since our high school graduation, which he absolutely ruined for me.
When he cornered me, after I’d managed to avoid him for a week, and snarled his threats at me. Dangled what he had on me over my head as a way to keep me quiet about what had happened.
What he’d done.
I’ve spent years trying to pretend that what he has that could destroy me doesn’t, in fact, exist; that the events of that night never actually happened.
Coming face to face with him has it all rushing back at once.
When I don’t respond, he smirks. “Damn, Eilish. You’re looking gorgeous.”
I want to throw up. Or fade away into dust. Or scream. Or possibly all three.
“You know, I’ve been meaning to reach out personally after my father and your uncle touched base.”
He shrugs, grinning at me like we’re old pals. Like he’s only my ex-boyfriend and not the face of my nightmares.
I flinch as he moves closer to me.
“Look, Eilish…” he shakes his head. “What happened before…I mean, we were kids, yeah? Just stupid kids fucking around. You know how it is. Awkward teenage years, amirite?”
He flashes me a thousand-watt JFK smile.
I suddenly very much wish I was Lee Harvey Oswald.
“Just kids fucking around…?” I echo numbly, staring at him.
A shadow flickers behind his all-American bright blue eyes.
“Exaaactly,” he says slowly and quietly, a hint of warning in his voice. “It’s easy to look back at something like that and cast blame. But who can say who did what? You know?”
I’m going to be sick. I can say exactly “who did what”. My body goes cold and numb, my pulse thudding in my ears.
“What I think, Eilish,” he growls, moving closer, “is that what’s best here is to look to the future. Don’t let what you think happened in the past govern you. The two of us, going forward? I mean, the power of our families combined, we’re talking a dynasty here…”
I flinch when his hand lands on mine as it clings to the bar. The room spins and blurs as he leans close.
“ And of course, Eilish ,” he growls quietly. “Don’t forget about, well…you know.”
His leverage. His hold on me. The nightmare I’ve tried to erase from my mind and push down in the hopes I can forget about it.
But I can’t.
It’s always there.
He still has the means to destroy me.
“Good,” Brooks mutters. “I feel we’re on the same page. Now, I’m thinking next week we should set up a meeting with my father and his people, and we can go over—”
Brooks squeals like a stuck pig as he’s suddenly ripped away from me. A dark, malevolent shape hurls him away into the crowd, which scatters to let him crash to the floor.
Then, the dark, hulking shape whirls on me with violence and fire brimming in his gunmetal gray eyes, and my heart stops for a second.
Gavan.
Part of me wants to hug him for shattering that horrible moment with Brooks. But another part of me has me squinting at him, my lips curled in a sneer.
“How the hell did you find me?”
It’s hardly the right response right now, given how furious he looks. But fuck that.
His eyes narrow. “Excuse me?”
“Were you spying on me?” I snap. “Was that your guy before at the bar?”
Gavan’s jaw clenches. “I can and always will find you,” he says icily. “Especially when you’re ignoring my simple—”
“ Demands ?” I blurt. “When I’m ignoring your irrational, tyrannical demands ?!”
“If you’re still unclear on the nature of our particular arrangement,” he hisses, “I would be happy to—”
“Oh, fuck off ! You don’t own me , Gavan!”
“Like hell I—”
He snarls as a hand grabs him by the shoulder and yanks him back. My face pales as he whirls on Brooks, who looks sputteringly mad.
“Just who the fuck do you think you are, buddy?” Brooks sneers at Gavan, completely unaware that he’s basically sticking his hand into a hungry lion’s mouth. “Do you have any idea who I am?” he continues. “Do you have any idea who my fucking father is!?”
Gavan smiles dangerously at him.
“Listen, pal,” Brooks blunders on. “She’s with me. So why don’t you go find a nice corner you can go fuck yourself in—”
He screams when Gavan’s forearm smashes into his nose with a horrible crunching sound. Blood spurts down his face as tears bead in his eyes.
“You fucking hit me?” he chokes, stumbling backward before falling unceremoniously on his ass. He looks up at Gavan in pure shock, then flinches when the Bratva king stoops down, grabbing a handful of his collar in his fist.
“The only reason I’m not doing more than hit you, little boy, is that I have more important things to do tonight beside washing your pathetic blood off my shoes.”
Brooks turns white, his eyes bulging.
“I don’t give a fuck who you are, and I certainly don’t give a fuck who your daddy is. But if you touch what’s mine again, I swear by whatever you hold holy that I will remove your hand from the rest of your arm with a rusty fucking soup spoon. Do we understand each other?”
Brooks stares, then swallows, nodding quickly.
“ Say it ,” Gavan hisses.
“I…!” He shudders. “I understand!”
“Now fuck off back to your playpen.”
Brooks scrambles to his feet, whirls, and makes a beeline for the exit. I shiver as Gavan slowly turns back to me.
“Are you fucking insane ?!” I hiss. “Do you have any idea who that—”
“Nope. And I don’t care.”
I gasp as he moves into me, grabbing me possessively with one arm around my waist as his other hand slides up to fist the back of my hair. Gavan tugs my head back, tilting my face up to his.
“But when I come for what’s mine after she refuses to do as I say, and I find someone else touching—”
“Oh my God !” I blurt, well past tipsy from all the cocktails as I roll my eyes and pull away from him. “You do not . Fucking. Own. Me !”
His eyes blaze. “Like fuck I don’t—”
I can’t do this right now.
Without another word, before he’s even done speaking, I whirl and shove my way through the crowd.
I zig and zag through the mass of hipsters drinking craft beers before I find myself at the back of the bar, at the hallway down to the restrooms. Stumbling, I bolt into the women’s single occupancy one and slam the door shut.
My fingers are literally still on the lock when the door kicks back open. I gasp, stumbling back with wide eyes as Gavan spills into the room like a puddle of black ink—like a dark storm cloud brimming with thunder and lightning.
I shudder as he moves into me, pressing me back until I can feel the edge of the sink at the small of my back.
“ We need boundaries ,” I blurt, shivering as heat teases through my core. I want to be mad at him, even if he did just save me from Brooks. I want to throw his possessive “I own you” shit right back in his face. I want to make him understand that nobody “owns” me.
Except when I look at this man—when I even think about this man—I’m not so sure that’s true anymore.
Someone does very much own every single part of me, as much as I might try and convince myself otherwise.
He does .
And the worst of it is, I’m not so sure I’m upset about it.
Still, my throat works as I glare at him.
“Boundaries,” I hiss again. “We need fucking—”
I whimper when his hand darts out, cupping my jaw firmly. He reaches back with his other hand, and I hear the lock click shut on the door.
“You want boundaries, solnishka ?”
I shiver, my breath coming fast and shallow as his strong fingers grab my jaw and throat, twisting my head to the side as his lips brush my ear.
“The only boundaries you’ll have with me are the motherfucking brick walls I put between you and any other man who even tries to touch you, look at you, or think about you .”
My body jolts, my breath hitching as his teeth rake down the soft skin of my neck.
Then, without warning, he’s spinning me around and pinning my hipbones against the sink.
I whimper, my hands gripping the edge of the porcelain as he fists my hair, shoving it aside and nipping at the nape of my neck.
“ Any questions ?” he rasps darkly.
I whimper, shaking my head side to side as my body melts against the rock-hard heat of him.
“ Good girl .”
I sputter as he suddenly yanks my dress up over my ass.
“Because you’re my good little free use fuck-toy, aren’t you?”
This is so fucked up. So deranged .
How come I can’t even bring myself to say no?
How come I don’t want to say no?
“ Yes ,” I blurt.
His powerful hand slips between us, sliding boldly between my legs to cup my pussy through my soaked panties, making me whimper eagerly.
“And this messy, greedy little pussy is mine to do with as I fucking please, isn’t it?”
My vision blurs. Heat floods my core as I nod, dazed, my chest heaving. Then I jump again when he deftly smacks the inside of my thighs, making me shiver.
“ Answer me, Solnishka ,” he snarls.
“ Yes …” I shudder. “Yes, Sir …”
I whimper when he yanks my panties aside and deftly sinks two thick fingers deep inside my aching pussy. I whine, arching my back and pushing my ass into him as he starts to finger me hard and fast.
My eyes roll back, my knees threatening to buckle as Gavan bites down on my shoulder.
His other hand snakes around, yanking the straps off my shoulders and pulling down the top of my sundress.
He groans, fingering me even harder as he pulls my bra down and cups one of my breasts in his powerful hand.
His fingers roughly pinch the aching, eager nipple, pulling a ragged cry from my lips as his other fingers curl deep against my g-spot.
“ What are you ,” Gavan rasps.
I moan, my pussy shuddering around him.
“I—”
“ Answer me .”