Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Giovanna
U nder instruction, I was back in my room with the door locked. At least in here I could pretend things were normal, even though I seriously doubted that my life would never be the same again. As the only person I seemed to be communicating with properly was Dante, I’d counted the hours since our last phone call, which had been before six that morning.
Finally, he’d arrived back at his parents’ villa. He’d sent a text to give me ten minutes warning he would be calling, and I now had the phone pressed tightly to my ear and was hanging off every word he spoke.
‘It’s fucking annoying.’ The exasperation he was feeling was evident. I listened quietly as Dante explained all the places he and his men had searched as they tried to uncover where Enzo had gone to ground.
‘I can only imagine. But you need to remember, you are all doing all you can and sooner or later he will make a mistake and you will flush him out.’
‘Let’s hope its sooner.’ he muttered, as I heard a door closing somewhere nearby.
‘Can you still talk?’ I whispered.
‘To you, always.’ I could imagine the smile on his lips as he spoke.
‘I heard a door.’
‘That was me shutting the rest of the world out for a few minutes.’ He sighed. ‘How’s your day gone?’
‘Oh, you know. I’ve listened to my mama’s companion about the state of her nerves and argued with Salvatore.’
‘Argued?’
‘Yes. I wanted to go and see Mia.’
I thought back to our conversation.
‘Can I go to see Mia?’
‘No.’
‘I could go with Serafina.’
‘No.’
‘What can I do then? How can I help?’
‘Help by staying here and looking after your parents.’
‘And what if I want to do more than that?’
‘Hear me, Gi… you will stay here, where I know you’re safe.’
With what was happening in and around our family, my jail cell doors had been shut just that little bit tighter. Annoyingly, my brother Salvatore now seemed to hold the key and he was a stubborn man, who although he still looked devastatingly handsome, seemed to have aged considerably over the past few days. I understood it was because of the pressure he now felt after stepping up to be the head of our family. I knew he loved me and that love even extended to our brothers, but at that moment in time, he was hell bent on revenge and keeping us all safe and was making demands of us all.
I’d rushed to his side as soon as I’d seen him emerging from our grandfather’s room only an hour before, desperate to find the companionship from him I had felt over the past few years. I needed a hug from my big brother and a few words of comfort, but I could tell by the look on his face that he had stepped up and away from being my brother and was so far into his new role, I wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to find his way back. My pleas had fallen on deaf ears, and we had not only argued about me visiting Mia, but also my reluctance to be the one who had to look after my parents.
I understood he was under pressure from every side. Secretly, though, I was worried that his rise to power above my papa had gone to his head, and I was finding it difficult to have him referred to as Don when my beloved nonno was still alive. Whereas I had always found Salvatore approachable before, we were now butting heads. It appeared he was set on keeping me locked away so I was safe, but at the same time he was going out of his way to make sure I didn’t get under his feet.
He was driving me mad.
‘And he refused to let you.’ Dante spoke, sounding resigned to my fate.
‘Yes… Now, before you tell me the same,’ I carried on, ‘I understand that my safety must be a priority. I know I could be the next target if this is something bigger than we’re hoping.’ An involuntary shiver spread down my back at my own admission. ‘But your sister is my friend and I have too few of those. I could go with my guards and the hospital is crawling with our men.’
‘I can see it from both sides,’ Dante admitted.
‘You can?’ I was thrilled. At least one of the men in my life appeared to have a more modern outlook. ‘I’m also due back in Bologna at the end of this week to work with my music professor. I haven’t even broached that subject yet.’
‘One day, I’d like to hear you play.’
‘I’d like that too.’ My heartrate began to quicken, and my skin felt flushed as I remembered his touch.
The sound of running water found me.
‘Giovanna, I’m going to put you on speaker. No one will hear you. I’m in need of a shower. Is that alright?’
‘Hmmm… okay.’ Suddenly my mouth felt dry as my imagination ran riot. I’d felt the firmness of his arms and chest under the button down he’d been wearing the previous day—was it really only the day before? And I could only imagine how good the man looked undressed with water running off him.
I had no idea why, but the thought of even talking to him while he shed his clothes and stepped under the shower spray, made my body ache in places I knew I’d never felt before.
I jumped, as what I could only assume was the metal from his belt connected with the tiled floor beneath his feet and I lifted my spare hand to hold onto the footboard at the bottom of my bed to steady myself.
‘So, tell me about your day?’ he questioned, between splashing water on his face and rubbing vigorously.
With careful precision I took him through my day. Also, I let him know that my papa had finally found his way home and was now sleeping off the alcohol that he appeared to need constantly these days to dull the edges of his life. All in all, I tried as hard as I could to sound as nonchalant as possible. All the while listening for any sounds that would give me a clue as to just where his hands were touching and washing at any given minute, and trying hard to forget just how good he had smelt yesterday.
‘I practised my piece.’ I nodded animatedly, knowing he couldn’t see me but wanting my words to sound as though I felt perfectly normal.
‘That’s good. Did it go well?’
I proceeded to expand enthusiastically, while I tried to ignore that each of my senses weren’t trained on his every movement and the noises he seemed to be absentmindedly making.
Glancing at myself again, I grimaced a little back at my reflection.
Little did Dante know, but after I’d eaten a little fruit for breakfast on the large patio outside the expansive saloon, gleaning as much information as I could about Nonno from Jeanine and listening as fleetingly as possible about my mama’s woes, I’d come in and chosen an outfit especially for him. Even though I knew he wouldn’t see me wearing it. Cream capri pants, a camel coloured, sleeveless silk vest and a pair of strappy sandals. My outfit fitted my figure to perfection and gave me an air of confidence. I’d given next to no thought to the fact I was dressing for a man who I hadn’t a clue when I’d next see, if ever again.
‘Stupid,’ I whispered to myself as I caught sight of my reflection again in the open French door leading from my room. Dante wasn’t going to see it. What the hell had I been thinking? I’d even added a final flourish, by tying a colourful scarf around my hair as an Alice band, so it fell in long waves down my back. I could still picture the way Dante had looked at my hair at the party we’d attended and had seen how his hand had lifted once or twice as if he was desperate to feel a strand between his fingers.
‘Sorry?’ he questioned, and as I realised that the water had stopped my head was full of visuals of Dante drying himself off with a towel, which had stolen away any chance I might have had to think straight.
‘Nothing, I just lost an earring and can’t see it,’ I lied. ‘Are you going back out again to search?’ I blinked a couple of times to clear my head.
‘I will be. But first my mum is feeding me pasta and meatballs, and then I’m going to church.’
‘You are?’ I tried to hide the surprise in my tone.
‘Don’t sound so surprised.’ He laughed, and I felt his laughter travel through me.
‘Sorry… I just didn’t think…’
‘I get it. I spend most of my time in London, and you’re right I only go to church when my parents visit. But given the situation and the fact Mia does go to church often, I want to go today.’
‘I can understand that. I think I’d like to go too.’
‘Meet me there.’
A flutter of excitement travelled through me. Surely, Salvatore wouldn’t refuse me a visit to church.
‘I want to see you, amore mio. I want to hold and comfort you. To be the one who washes away the unshed tears from your eyes. But most of all I want to kiss you again.’
‘In church?’ I cursed the minute the question left my mouth. It had not so subtle hysteria and shock wrapped around its tone.
‘In church,’ he countered, sounding amused.
‘I’m not sure that’s allowed.’ I grimaced as I heard myself talking.
‘We’re two consenting adults, Giovanna,’ he reminded me, taking on a reprimanding tone.
‘I know, but...’
‘No buts. The only question here is, do you want to be kissed by me?’
‘You know I do.’ My voice fell to a whisper at my admission.
‘Maybe, but I want to hear you tell me.’
‘I…’ My voice faltered.
‘Tell me, amore mio.’ He did it again, calling me his love. It was then I understood I would risk anything to be with him, even my own embarrassment.
‘I want you to kiss me again.’ My cheeks were burning at my confession, and although it wasn’t at all cold, my skin broke out in goosebumps as I relived for maybe the hundredth time, just what it felt like to be in Dante’s arms with his lips pressed on mine.
‘I know, and more than anything I want to kiss you, too. It gives me pleasure to instruct you, Giovanna.’ His voice deepened as he spoke. I was inexperienced but even I recognised the lust in his tone. ‘When I kiss you again, make no mistake, you will enjoy it.’
I stifled the gasp that was trying to force its way from my lips. What was it with the way he spoke to me? All I knew was I wanted to hear more, and I was prepared to create hell to ensure my brother let me go.
‘I’ll see you in one hour,’ he instructed.
It took all I had not to answer him with a “Yes, sir.”
‘It’s clear, Don De Luca.’ Lorenzo, who had been one of my bodyguards since I’d crossed from childhood to womanhood, informed my brother.
Hearing him speak, I stopped wrapping my hair up in the silk scarf I’d brought with me and used the anger I felt at the title he’d bestowed on Salvatore to shove my hand against his shoulder. It made the large man, who was at least six or seven years older than me, take a surprised step back.
‘My grandfather is still alive,’ I reminded him, almost hissing the words through my teeth. I knew it was inevitable my grandfather would die—but until it was so, I wasn’t going to allow my brother to take his title within earshot of me.
Lorenzo had the decency at least to silently acknowledge my anger and pain. As he carried on listening to Salvatore, he mouthed his apology and dipped his head to me.
‘Yeah, just a couple of old women at the front lighting candles and praying, the confessional is empty. Paulo is standing guard at the west entrance.’ He stopped to listen for further instructions, then looked down at me. ‘You can go in now, Giovanna.’
‘By myself?’ I questioned.
‘Yes, by yourself. We will have both doors covered. Hold on.’ Suddenly he was pulling out his earpiece and handing it to me.
‘I’m not wearing that.’ I shook my head at him vehemently, suddenly worried my secret rendezvous was about to be spoilt.
‘The boss wants to talk to you.’ He raised an eyebrow at me.
‘Okay, okay.’
I held it close to my ear without it touching my skin.
‘Salvatore.’
‘Lorenzo says you’re clear to go in. Make your visit quick and come straight back home.’
‘I want to do confession.’ I could almost picture him pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. I knew I was being a complete brat, but I was willing to say and do anything to spend a little time with Dante.
‘Giovanna, do you understand what is going on?’ Salvatore raised his voice. ‘You are a De Luca woman. As such you would be a prized scalp for our enemies to take. I want you safe. I want you home as soon as possible.’
A shudder crept down my spine as I thought of what Mia had been through.
‘I want to light candles for Mia and for Nonno. I want to pray for her recovery, for all our sakes, but especially for Gabriel’s. I want God to hear my pleas to take Nonno into his arms as painlessly and comfortably as possible.’ I sniffed back the emotion that was once again threatening to engulf me.
‘Too much time, Gi.’ I could hear the strain in his voice.
‘You have your way, Salvatore. I have mine. I need to do this for our family, and you need to let me. Before…’ I stopped myself short. I knew how much I loved my brother. We had been forced into an awful situation, and I understood he was doing his best. I’d already come to terms with the fact I hadn’t really understood the dynamics in the way families like ours worked until a few days before.
‘Before what?’ he questioned, and I glanced quickly at the steadying stone building within arm’s reach. Was Dante already inside? I had to force my empty hand to remain at the side of my body and not reach out to touch the solid structure, which would surely give me away.
‘Before nothing,’ I conceded, knowing that in my reply was held my chance of getting across the threshold.
I understood my constraints, of course I did. I’d been aware of the fighting our family had been embroiled in only a year before, but I’d been protected against it. Mama and I had continued to travel, shop, and attend the theatre, and I continued with my studies. Because, until the past few days, women and children had remained inviolable.
But…call me immature, or green behind the ears, call me what you will… but suddenly, I’d been thrust into a world I’d had no previous experience of. Without my nonno, parents or brothers to lean on, I knew I was floundering in a violent sea, and I was at risk of drowning.
‘I know this is hard, Gi.’ Salvatore tried hard to let the forcefulness in his voice go. ‘I understand you’re scared and upset. But I need to not have to worry about you as well as everything else that’s going on… tell me you understand that?’
‘I do, I think. But you must allow me to breathe. I need to grieve; I need to pray and have my confession heard. Please.’ I presented my plea to him.
‘I won’t pretend to understand why you women push.’ I knew at that minute he was talking about me and Serafina, and wondered fleetingly just what she was pushing him for. ‘But my job as your brother is to keep you out of harm’s way, I need you to remember that.’ I nodded and released a sigh of my own. ‘You, standing outside and us having this drawn-out conversation, isn’t getting you back here. So, go in and do what you need to. I will see you at home shortly,’ Salvatore conceded.
‘Thank you, Salvatore.’
In one fluid movement, I dropped my hand from my ear and placed the earpiece into Lorenzo’s awaiting hand. In response, he grabbed at my wrist, making me falter and look at him in question.
‘Be quick,’ he spoke, as I pulled my hand away.
‘I have no need of any more brothers, Lorenzo.’ I glared at him, making sure he understood my insinuation, and watched as he nodded back his understanding.
Men!
Turning away, I started to take the few steps I needed to cross the worn stone flagstones. The brilliance of the sunlight dimmed, and its warmth left my body rapidly as I stepped from the light and into the cold stone building that was only lit by a limited number of high windows and the small tealights that had been haphazardly placed onto a few of the windowsills. Once I could no longer see Lorenzo, I stopped to give my pupils time to dilate and get used to my surroundings.
Casting my refocussed eyes onto the space I was now stood in, I searched for any movement. Disappointment captured me, when I only found the older ladies that Lorenzo had spoken of to Salvatore, and the priest who was in the process of lighting the gold-coloured thurible that always contained incense. Finding no direction in which to keep walking I stalled in the aisle, curtsying to the Madonna and child and making the sign of the cross in front of my body. Closing my eyes momentarily, I whispered up to God the prayers I needed him to hear and made the sign of the cross once again. As I took my first few steps and came in line with the antique, ornately carved, wooden confessionals which stood to the left of me, two things happened.
Firstly, the oak door to the west slammed behind the priest who vacated, and then an outstretched arm appeared unexpectedly in front of me. The hand took hold of my arm and pulled me towards the enclosed booth. My small gasp was extinguished by the shudder of the door finding home and instinct had me smacking my balled-up fists down onto the arm that now had me in its confines, as I fought to be released. It was then I noticed that the bare arm that had maintained its hold on me was covered with the same leather wrist straps I’d been fascinated with only a few days before. Breathing in deeply and trying to calm myself to keep my wits about me, I realised all I could smell was the cologne I knew I would only ever associate with Dante. In that knowledge, and without any further thought, I placed my hands on his muscular forearm and relaxed into my captor’s strong hold.
Giovanna De Luca disappeared in those few seconds, not just visibly behind the lattice work of the priest’s private part of the confessional. But also, the childlike part of her was extinguished under the very careful expertise of Dante Giordano, as his arms wrapped tightly around me, our eyes met, and his lips found mine.