Chapter 2
This beautiful, aesthetically pleasing woman had been talking for ten minutes, and I’d stopped listening and responding five minutes ago. I wasn’t surprised she hadn’t noticed, because she seemed to enjoy hearing herself talk. When my eyes began to glaze over, I knew it was time for me to go.
I picked up my phone, which was face down on the table, and looked at the screen. There were no new messages or missed calls, but my date didn’t have to know that. I had to say excuse me three times before she’d notice I’d spoken. The third time, she finally shut the fuck up.
“Excuse me!”
“Oh, my bad. Did you want to say something?”
“Yes. I have an emergency I need to attend to. Here’s enough money to cover your meal, a few more drinks, dessert if you’d like, and your ride home. I’ll be in touch,” I lied, because her number would be blocked before I made it to my car.
I was on my feet, counting out enough cash as I spoke, and dropped it on the table before I walked away. I heard her calling my name but wouldn’t dare turn around. If I didn’t get away from her, my hands would end up around her neck just to shut her ass up.
When I got to my car, I started the engine, and as soon as my Bluetooth connected, I called my boy, Semaj. We played professional football together for several years before we retired, and he’d become my closest friend.
“Damn! Your date already over?” he answered.
“Man, I give up. I had to leave mid-conversation because I was losing brain cells.”
“Oh shit. Pull up to The Spot. I just got here.”
“Bet.”
The call ended, and I headed to the sports lounge Semaj and I owned on the north side of Chicago. As I drove, I thought about how much my life had changed over the past two months. I never thought I’d be forty-two and single, but here I was.
After a ten-year marriage, my wife and I decided to divorce after she informed me that she no longer wanted children.
Before we got married, we discussed having children in great detail, and she was one hundred percent on board.
We agreed to wait until after I retired because I wanted to be fully involved in the raising of our children.
I’d been retired for five years, and every time I brought it up, she convinced me it wasn’t time.
Finally, I asked her straight up if she’d changed her mind, and it fucked me up when she said she had.
I loved Mia, but I knew I couldn’t stay married to her.
Having children was very important to me because I was an only child.
I lost my parents, at different times, to drug and alcohol abuse when I was in my twenties, a few years after I entered the league.
It was hard, but I think it was harder because I had to deal with it on my own. Growing up as an only child was lonely most of the time, and even more so because my parents were caught up in their addiction. Back then, when I thought about the future, I planned to have at least three children.
If Mia had told me she couldn’t have children, that would’ve been one thing.
We could’ve adopted or possibly used a surrogate.
When I brought those ideas up, she was entirely opposed because she no longer wanted to make the sacrifices it took to be a mother and raise children.
Instead of staying in the marriage and resenting her, I filed for a divorce.
Fifteen minutes later, I arrived at The Spot and parked in one of the parking spots reserved for Semaj and me in the back. Once inside, my ears were filled with the noise from multiple televisions, music, and the voices of men talking loudly.
Semaj was seated in our usual booth located in the back corner with his younger brother, Jovan. I pulled up a chair at the end of the booth, turned it backward, and sat down.
“Damn, bruh. Was it that bad?” Semaj asked with a smirk.
“It was worse.”
He and Jovan laughed at my expense.
“Was she at least good to look at?” Jovan asked.
“She was fine as hell, but as soon as she opened her mouth and started talking, it went downhill. If I had to listen to one more story about how the nail tech used the wrong color on her nails, or how she ordered the wrong wig, I would’ve lost it.”
“Yeah. She sounds very superficial,” Semaj commented.
“I’m close to throwing in the towel. This dating shit is for the birds,” I said.
“I believe you, and that’s why I told you to think long and hard before divorcing Mia,” Semaj said.
“I did think long and hard about it. I’d rather be single than stay married to a woman I resent.”
“It sounds like you want children more than you loved Mia,” Jovan said.
I shrugged. “My desire for a family didn’t change because hers did.
Had I toughed it out, a decent marriage would’ve gone to shit, and I would’ve ended up hating her.
I loved her enough not to put her through that.
This way, we parted ways on decent terms and can live our lives in the best way we see fit. ”
“That makes a lot of sense.” He agreed.
“Based on the experiences you’ve had dating so far, you still might not get the family you want because you can’t find a suitable mate,” Semaj said with a chuckle.
I found no humor in my situation. It had only been two months, and I was already beginning to give up hope.
“Maybe I’ll use a dating service. I heard Platinum Connections was really good,” I told them.
“An escort service? That’s doing too much, bruh. You’ve only been single for a minute,” Semaj said.
“I’m forty-two years old. I want to be able to do shit with my kids and not have them pushing me around in a wheelchair.”
They laughed, but I was as serious as a heart attack.
“That’s extreme, but I feel you. The way my two toddlers climb and jump on me all the time has me thanking God I’m in decent shape,” Jovan confessed.
“Those lil niggas are just bad. My girls don’t act shit like their cousins,” Semaj added. “Before you throw in the towel or start using escorts, maybe you should take a little vacation to clear your head.”
“My head is clear.”
“Nah. The ink ain’t even dry on your divorce papers, and you’ve been out here serial dating. You ain’t really even had time to sort out your feelings. Lasting relationships usually happen authentically, and you seem to be trying to force it.”
I thought about Semaj’s words before responding. I couldn’t deny that he had some good points.
“You got some valid points, and I may be trying to force it, but my head is clear. The ink might not be dry on my divorce papers, but I checked out months before it was final. A vacation might be good, though. I’ll look at my schedule and book something soon.”
“Or, you can go to Barbados and chill at the house we have there. We already have a cleaning lady, and I can reach out to the chef we use when we visit. She’s the best, by the way.
There’s a pool, a hot tub, and a workout room.
It’s private, but not too far from the fun.
All you need to do is book your flight, and I’ll handle the rest.”
“Nigga, I ain’t broke. I can pay you for—”
“Consider it a gift. No payment necessary. I’m down for anything to help get you outta this funk.”
I mulled over his offer for a few minutes before agreeing.
He showed me pictures of the place, and it was nice as hell.
Semaj’s parents were born in Barbados, and most of his family still lived there.
He took his family there often, which was why they bought a house.
The more he shared about the island, the more excited I was about the trip.
After eating a few appetizers and enjoying a few drinks, we spoke to our staff to make sure they didn’t need anything and left. The day seemed longer than it was, and when I arrived home, I showered and crawled into bed with Barbados on my mind.
“Maybe I’ll find myself a Bajan queen while I’m there,” I whispered as I dozed off.
The next morning, I woke up still thinking about Barbados.
After looking at my work calendar, I found a block of time I could use for a real vacation.
I worked virtually as a part-time football analyst, providing commentary on college and professional games throughout the football season from the comfort of my home office.
I sent Semaj the dates I was considering, and he confirmed they were fine, promising to get back to me with any necessary information. The more I thought about it, the more I agreed with Semaj . . . A vacation might be exactly what I needed.