Chapter 26 #3
“I know the timing wasn’t perfect, but it’s not as if you could’ve stopped your heat,” Emerson said. “As far as leaving, you weren’t yourself yet, and in no condition to leave. We both know that.”
“Maybe the Guard was right. They said it was bad enough I was alpha, but I was a danger to their investigations as an omega, too. I refused to believe it then, but now my nature has finally impacted a case.”
“You don’t know that. It’s not over yet.”
Dash shook his head. “What if something terrible happened to Jaye while I was here, with you?”
Emerson clearly didn’t have an answer to that. Dash sat down and looked out the round window at the setting sun.
“Do you really want me to take you back?” Emerson asked. “You seem more yourself now—though I truly believe you need more rest.”
Dash stared at Emerson for a moment, torn between the two. “No. I’ll leave in the morning. I still feel a bit… off.”
Emerson massaged his back. Dash closed his eyes, melting into his mate.
“Em?”
“Yeah?”
“You called me your omega in front of Jackson and Mason.”
“I know. I’m sorry. It came out before I even realized I’d said it.”
“You don’t see me as that, do you?”
Emerson lifted his chin with a gentle caress. “As omega? No.” He smiled softly. “As mine? Abso-fucking-lutely.”
“It wasn’t the only time you called me omega while I’ve been in heat.”
“It might be the instinct.” Emerson frowned. “The word flew from my lips without conscious thought. I’m sorry.” He brushed his fingertips through Dash’s hair. “I don’t see you as anything but an alpha.”
Conscious or not, the word had stung. Especially in front of Mason and Jackson.
“The reason I want you to rest is I can still feel a lingering heat within you. My rutting alpha is just under the surface. Another alpha came on my boat and approached you—and hinted he’d lay hands on you.
The instinct kicked in and I reacted. And I misspoke.
I’ll do my best to stop myself from saying it again. ”
“If it is the instinct, you might not be able to.”
“I was able to hold back long enough to get condom on. If I can do that, I can train myself to not utter that word again. Just give me time.” Emerson leaned closer. “I’m sorry. Do you forgive me?”
Dash fought a smile. “Knowing it might be instinct helps. Versus something you did purposefully.”
“I’ll do my best to curb it,” Emerson said. “But sometimes we might say things we don’t mean. Like when you said you wanted me to breed you.”
Dash stiffened. He’d never wanted to even imagine being pregnant. How humiliating would that be? Not only would the world know what he was, but he’d be a laughingstock. The freak alpha who could get pregnant.
Yet, with Emerson, that fear grew less. The idea of giving his mate children didn’t seem quite so terrifying. It wouldn’t be him against the world.
It would be them against the world.
“You don’t want to get pregnant, right?” Emerson asked, his tone suggesting he was fishing for an answer.
“I don’t.”
Emerson’s face fell. Dash closed his eyes, the desire to give in whispering in his mind.
“I didn’t think so,” Emerson said, almost robotically. “That’s why I used protection.”
“Except when we were in the bathroom,” Dash whispered.
Emerson tensed. “Fuck… I was so wound up, I forgot. I’m sorry, Dash.”
“It’s not all up to you,” Dash said. “It’s as much my responsibility as it is yours. I’ve been so far gone, though—had it not been for you, we probably wouldn’t have had any protection.”
“I’m supposed to protect you, though,” Emerson muttered. “I failed.”
“We don’t know that yet,” Dash said. “I overheard that specialist tell another doctor that I was barely fertile. He said it would take moving heaven and earth to get me pregnant. Hopefully he was right.”
“Who do you get your Heatex and Scentex scripts from?”
Dash chuckled. “My papa helped me get the first but then I was able to find them on the black market.”
“Jeeeze.” Emerson sighed. “Perhaps we’ll find you another specialist here in Fort Seattle and monitor your condition better. After you finish this case, of course.”
“No thanks. I won’t be anyone’s lab rat again.”
“Cassidy’s a biology professor at the university. He’s got connections. If memory serves, a close colleague is the one who helped him figure out he was a latent omega. Maybe they can help you.”
Knowing someone close to Emerson who could assist in navigating that made him a bit less hesitant. If he could find someone who’d give him answers without trapping him in an endless cycle of tests, he’d be more inclined to seek knowledge about his condition.
“Maybe.”
Emerson pressed a kiss to Dash’s forehead. “Better than a no.”
Dash smiled. “Glad you didn’t use that commanding voice against me to force my hand, either.”
Emerson cupped his chin and brought his gaze up. “I’ll never force you to do anything you’re dead set against—unless it’s in your best interest.”
“And who determines what’s in my best interest?” Dash challenged.
Emerson shook his head. “You do… unless you’re pushing yourself too hard.”
Dash rolled his eyes before snuggling against Emerson. Hopefully he could trust Emerson to keep his word. The man held way too much sway over him.
“How about we stay out here tonight where you can rest easy and I’ll take us into dock early enough for you to get to work?”
“Yes, sir,” Dash murmured before his eyes slowly closed—and he drifted off to sleep.