Chapter Ten
THROUGHOUT THE RIDE, Kelsie floated along in a warm, exhilarating bubble—well, a fast-moving, vibrating bubble made of metal, but the magic was very real. Minute by minute, she’d shed the events of the morning until all she felt was the thrill of the ride. It didn’t hurt that the man between her legs excited her even more than the feeling of flying down the highway on a steel stallion.
The wind rushing past blew away her cares, worries, and the mountain of baggage. When they hit the highway, her only concern was whether the ride would end too soon.
But now that they’d apparently reached their destination—Ty’s house—and he’d looked at her in that assessing way only he could, the morning’s events came barreling back. Ty had this unique talent for making her feel like he could want her, could find her attractive one second, and pitied her the next. The yo-yoing left her confused and feeling foolish, but he’d come to her rescue yet again, so how could she harbor anything but gratitude toward him?
Shoving aside her awakening desire, Kelsie followed him into the house. She smiled after one step and a quick glance around the open-concept layout.
“What’s that look?” Ty had walked straight to the spotless kitchen, where he stood near a fancy coffee machine.
“It’s very you. The house, I mean.”
He chuckled and then gave her his back as he made them coffee. “You mean stiff, boring, and old?”
Rearing back, Kelsie shook the head. “What? No. That’s not what I meant at all. Did someone call you that?”
His strong shoulders rose and fell.
None of those words ever came to mind when she thought of him.
“It’s neat and clean, which doesn’t surprise me at all. You seem like someone who likes his ducks in a row. I imagine it’s important to be organized when you run a business. It’s also modern in here without being cold. I don’t know why anyone would call it boring. I think it’s perfect for you. It’s masculine without being in-your-face, I’m-such-a-man macho.”
He pushed a button on the machine and then turned with a raised eyebrow. “I’m-such-a-man macho?”
Cheeks warm, Kelsie looked away. He was too damn attractive, and when he got that amused look, it only made him hotter. “Yeah, you know the type. Posters of naked women on the walls, a giant stereo system, and a freezer full of Hot Pockets. The kind of guys who always feel the need to prove their masculinity.”
That had him laughing out loud. “You haven’t snooped in my freezer. It could be overflowing with Hot Pockets.”
“Nah,” she grinned at him, “I’m not worried.”
As he turned back to deal with the coffee, Kelsie took the opportunity to get a better feel for the place. His kitchen had stark white cabinets, white marble countertops, stainless steel appliances, and a large island with a sink and plenty of space to prepare food was situated in the center of the room. Behind her, the kitchen opened to a moderate den. A large-screen television was mounted to the wall directly opposite the kitchen, and a plush black couch faced it. The only thing out of place was an open motorcycle magazine on a wooden coffee table in front of the couch.
Masculine without being macho.
Like Ty.
Not that she knew him well enough to make sweeping statements about his personality, but she knew a bit.
When she turned back, he was holding two coffee mugs. “Grab a seat,” he said, nudging his chin toward the couch.
She frowned. Something in his voice had a twist of unease curling in her stomach. “Okay.” She did as asked, and he handed her a full coffee mug. “Thanks.” He hadn’t bothered to ask how she took it. One glance revealed it was as light as she preferred. She sniffed. Vanilla. Her favorite. She took a tentative sip. No one could call her a coffee snob. She liked it light, sweet, and so vanilla it could be mistaken for ice cream, exactly like the mug in her hands.
How had he known?
“I pay attention,” he answered without her having to voice the question.
“Oh, well, thank you. It’s perfect.”
He chuckled. “It’s disgusting.”
“Let me guess, you drink it black?”
“Sure do. Like an I’m-such-a-man man.”
That had her laughing, and the twinge of discomfort she’d experienced a moment ago fled.
Until he opened his mouth again. “Okay, times up. Start talking.”
Her stomach sank. “W-what do you mean?”
His narrowed eyes screamed don’t play dumb.
“I don’t really want to talk about it.” Ever. To anyone.
Ty set his mug on the coffee table—with a Harley coaster, of course—then gave her the full weight of his somber stare.
Oh, how she hated that look. It made her want to tell him. To open up and word vomit everything she’d tucked away into a corner of her brain to fester and rot until it drove her to the brink. Wasn’t that the healthy way to deal with trauma?
“Look, Ty, I’m sorry about what happened this morning, but I don’t need a lecture on how badly things could have gone or how violence isn’t the answer. I don’t need or want you to play the fatherly role and try to get me to open up. I recognize I have more issues than that biker magazine you have there.”
His gaze intensified, which she wouldn’t have thought possible. He reached over and took her coffee mug, placing it on the table beside his. Then he scooted close enough to reach out and grab her chin between his thumb and forefinger, which he did.
Her heart thudded like a wild drum solo.
“First off, I haven’t had a single fucking fatherly thought about you since the moment I laid eyes on you.”
What?
“Next,” he continued as though he hadn’t scrambled her brain already. “In the last few weeks, I’ve seen you in the hospital after hurting yourself and in my shop, ready and willing to hurt someone else. I won’t tell you violence is never the answer because I don’t believe that. And trust me, once you’ve told me what that motherfucker did to you, he will know violence. But I don’t give two shits about what happens to him. I care about you. And no matter what you tell yourself, you’re not okay right now, sweetheart. So, you’re gonna open that pretty mouth and start talking because I refuse to let you continue in this not-okay space. You deserve so much more.”
Kelsie sucked in a breath.
His words…
How could she even think of denying his request? No one had ever looked at her like he did at that moment with such intensity and feeling, and was that desire?
Did he want her?
Is that what he meant by not feeling fatherly? Was he attracted to her?
The thought had her lower belly tightening so fast it was nearly painful. Her breasts grew heavy and needy. His hold on her chin wasn’t erotic in any way, and yet the feel of his fingers on her skin had goose bumps breaking out all along her arms. It had been so long since she felt anything but fear and revulsion when it came to men or even a flicker of desire, and it felt amazing.
Her surroundings blurred until nothing remained in her vision or mind but Ty, and she wanted these wonderful feelings to continue even more.
She wanted his hands and mouth on her. Those lips that spoke such wonderful words, she wanted to feel them on her skin and remember what it felt like to be unafraid of pain or humiliation with a man.
Ty could give that to her. He might be the only one she’d ever trust again.
Without thought, she threw herself forward and pressed her lips against his. He froze as though someone had dipped him in liquid nitrogen.
But he didn’t pull away.
His lips were warm and soft but pressed down tight. Kelsie ran her tongue along the seam, capturing a hint of bitter coffee before giving his lower lip a sharp nip.
Ty grunted. His hands landed on her hips before he yanked them away, then grabbed her again as though afraid to touch but unable to stop himself.
How hot was that?
Yet it wasn’t enough.
She scrambled into his lap and kissed him harder.
He groaned and lost the battle, grabbing her thighs and holding tight. His mouth opened, accepting her tongue, which she slipped right inside.
The control he’d allowed her for the past few moments vanished instantly. Ty took over, plundering her mouth with the kind of confidence and experience that spoke to his years over her in the best way. This was a man who knew how to wring pleasure out of a woman.
He coasted his hand up her spine, then gripped the back of her head, tilting her chin up so he could better ravage her mouth. She felt every stroke of his tongue as though he were between her legs instead of at her mouth. She was at his mercy, and she’d never loved anything more. Her body hummed with pleasure from his taste and the aggressive way he kissed her, yet she’d never felt safer. He wouldn’t hurt her. He would only deliver more of this bone-melting pleasure.
His grip on her hair tightened, causing the strands to pull against her scalp. Kelsie moaned and shifted in his lap. She was needy and wanted to grind against him for relief. She had her arm around him, testing all those impressive muscles in his back with her curious fingers. Their tongues danced, and their lips met again and again. She didn’t fight him for control but met him where he wanted her with hungry kisses.
He slid his other hand to her ass and squeezed as he ground her against the very hard bulge in his pants. A shocking bolt of pleasure speared through her core, making her cry out.
In an instant, he was gone.
Ty practically launched her off him as he backed up until he hit the opposite end of the couch. Kelsie fell against the cushion, panting.
What the hell happened?
“Fuck.” Ty stood and raked a hand through his hair as he paced away from her. “Jesus, fuck, I’m sorry.” He spun back. The expression of self-loathing on his face made her want to cry.
“Ty, it’s okay.”
“What?” He blinked at her, then shook his head. “No, it’s fucking not okay. You…” He gestured in her direction. “And I…” He shook his head. “I shouldn’t have done that. Christ, I shouldn’t have touched you. I’m so sorry.”
She stood and stepped toward him, but he raised a hand, warding her off. “Ty, I threw myself at you. I kissed you. I climbed in your lap for God’s sake.”
“Doesn’t matter.” He paced again. “I had my hands—” He cringed as though the memory of touching her disgusted him, and her stomach soured. The last thing she’d ever want was to make him feel as though he’d violated her in some way, even if his post-kiss freakout stung like a damn hive of bees. She knew violation, and what happened a few seconds ago couldn’t have been further from it.
“Ty, I promise you, I wanted it. I wanted you.” She ignored the invisible wall he erected between them and grabbed his arms. “I wanted it, and I liked it.”
God, how she’d liked it. Even with him freaking out, her lips still tingled, and her breasts felt heavy with unfulfilled need. She was aware of the strength in his forearms in a way she hadn’t been before. How the crisp, dark hair felt against her palms.
He didn’t seem to have heard her. “I need to go,” he said, tugging out of her grip. “Fuck, it’s my house.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I’m gonna take a quick walk. Will you be okay here?”
The way he looked out for her, even as he berated himself, warmed her heart. “Please don’t leave. You did nothing wrong.”
He grunted. “Nothing wrong. Right. I’m no better than that fucker from this morning.” He turned his back to her, grabbed his sunglasses off the counter, then stormed toward the front door.
Kelsie’s breath lodged in her throat. She wanted to beg and plead with him to stay. How could she get through to him? How could she make him understand she’d loved his hands on her? She trusted him and knew he’d never hurt her. She wanted more and knew he was possibly the only man she’d ever let touch her again.
His hand gripped the door handle, and the words flew from her, but not what she’d planned to say. “He choked me until I blacked out!” she shouted as the panic of him leaving won out over the shame of what happened to her.
He froze, his back to her and his hand on the door. “What?”
Never had one word been filled with so much venom. Were he any other man, she’d have fled, but there wasn’t a doubt in her mind he’d never turn that anger her way, no matter how hot it burned inside him.
“He—” She sighed. “He purchased me. It was an auction, and he bid on me and won.”
Ty slowly turned until he faced her again, though twenty feet separated them.
“And what exactly did he win?”
Kelsie swallowed. It was impossible to speak of this and not relive every agonizing second as though it were happening again. “Me,” she said, staring at the ground. “He won me, uh, for the night. To do…”
Don’t think about it. Don’t think about it.
“Whatever he w-wanted.”
Ty’s stubbled jaw ticked, and his eyes flashed with fury, but he didn’t lose his temper. Instead, he walked back over with a stiff gait. “Tell me.”
It wasn’t a request, but she nodded. “Um, when the auction ended, I was brought to a room. It had a bed and… stuff. Items for…” She cleared her throat. What could she call them? They’d been made for pleasure, but that hadn’t been their purpose that night. At least not her pleasure, that was for damn sure.
“I get it,” he said.
“Right.” She folded her arms across her chest, rubbing the skin of her upper arms as a chill washed over her. “Anyway, he was aggressive and dove right in.” The memories of his hands and mouth made her skin crawl. “I fought him, but he won. Though I didn’t make it easy on him. But that meant I ended up bruised and battered.”
That was as deep into the details as she was willing to dive. She needed therapy, for sure, probably for years to come, but her mind had gone into protective mode and refused to let her think about the precise details of what happened.
Thankfully, Ty respected her and didn’t ask for more.
“When he was, uh, done, I thought he would leave. But he didn’t. He was mad because I’d gotten a few good shots in, and he had a bloody nose. Some deep scratches too.”
“That’s my girl,” Ty said, finally losing the death glare, though it returned as soon as she spoke again.
“Yeah, well, he wrapped his hands around my throat and squeezed. Hard. He was so angry. Um, he didn’t stop, no matter how hard I fought. It wasn’t long before my vision got fuzzy and then black around the edges. I couldn’t fight anymore after that. It was like my muscles wouldn’t work without air. I was so scared,” she whispered. “I really thought I was going to die, and even though I’d been tortured and wanted it to stop, I didn’t want to die.” Her voice cracked as a shudder wracked her body.
Ty grabbed her and yanked her close, wrapping his strong arms around her. His scent—leather and a bit of tire rubber—invaded her senses, calming her racing heart. There was nothing sexual about the hug. It was meant for pure comfort and healing.
“I passed out,” she said. She wanted to rest her cheek on his chest and stay there forever, but she forced herself to pull out of his hold and take a few steps back. Becoming dependent on him for comfort would be stupid.
“When I woke up, I was back in my cell. I’m pretty sure he… well, again, but I couldn’t be sure. My throat was on fire. I couldn’t talk for two days. I still get some pain sometimes. The doctors said it could be months before I am all the way healed. Well, my throat anyway.” Her mind might never fully recover.
The trauma of being strangled was so awful she didn’t fight the next time, but she wasn’t ready to admit that. At the time, it had seemed a way to protect herself, but now it felt cowardly—as though she’d given up too easily.
He hadn’t spoken in a while, and she felt the weight of his silence thick and awkward between them.
Ty closed the distance between them once again. This time, he took her hands, which she hadn”t realized she’d placed against her throat, and drew them down. Then he caught her chin between his thumb and forefinger, which he seemed to love to do, and titled her head back.
“You c-can’t see anything,” she said as shivers intertwined her arms. “The bruises are gon—oh.” She breathed out as he bent forward and brushed his lips over the hollow of her throat.
His breath ghosted over her skin as he moved down her neck and did it again. His lips traveled across her neck and throat in the most gentle presses, finding every spot where ugly purple bruises had lived not long ago.
Her eyes fluttered shut. She blocked out the rest of the world, focusing only on the tingles running through her thanks to Ty’s ministrations.
“Ty,” she said on a breathy exhale as his mouth coasted up her jaw.
He stopped at her ear, tickling the shell with his lips.
Kelsie whimpered.
“I’m going to make him beg for death,” he whispered against her ear.
Her eyes flew open.
“Then I’m going to deny it so I can hear him scream a little longer. And when I finally let him die, he’ll go knowing every ounce of pain he suffered was because he fucking dared to hurt you.”
His raspy voice and the solemn promise full of violent intent should have set her on edge. Instead, it awoke her nerve endings and turned her on. Deep and dark, what he offered made her want him in a way she didn’t understand. She had a brief flash of him coming to her, his hands covered with the blood of the men who’d hurt her and putting those hands all over her.
Sick? Maybe, but she’d come to terms with not being normal long ago. After growing up the way she had and enduring the horrors she did, normal shouldn’t even be in her vocabulary.
“Come with me to the clubhouse.” He still spoke against her ear, and she swore she felt the graze of his teeth on her earlobe. Her legs trembled and threatened to buckle out from under her. “When you close your eyes tonight, you’ll sleep knowing there’s one less monster in the world.”
“Yes.”
She’d go anywhere with him.