Chapter Thirteen
Charlotte had always loved London. It was a part of her, stitched into her soul, and had been from the first time she and Jane had come to town together, exploring it as teenagers, jumping on the tube and travelling around wherever the Piccadilly or Jubilee or Northern lines decided to take them.
But the moment Dante’s jet touched down in the city, and they slipped into his limousine bound for South Ken-sington, a darkness had settled around Charlotte.
A sense of reality. A feeling that everything they’d shared in Italy had been some kind of dream that wouldn’t translate to this life, to this place.
There, she’d felt so close to him, regardless of what they’d said from the start.
There, neither had had work commitments, or other obligations.
They’d been together from morning until night.
They’d slept in the same bed. They’d shared every meal, every pot of coffee, every laugh, every swim, every little bit of it.
And even without understanding what she was feeling, until that night by the pool, she’d intrinsically known that it was a very special time.
That he made her feel special, even if he didn’t love her.
But back in London, with work to consume them both and the inevitable taking over of the Papandreo company, it was easy to believe things would change between them. Or rather, go back to what they’d been before. Sex but otherwise, a polite distance.
The thought left her cold, when she suspected it should have been reassuring.
They travelled in silence, but Charlotte was too wrapped up in her thoughts and worries to notice or care. But as the car pulled into his street, Dante made a sound of surprise. She glanced at him, and then followed the direction of his gaze, to where a woman was standing outside his house.
A tall, brunette, dressed in a skinny jeans, hi-top sneakers and a pretty camisole top.
Something in Charlotte began to sink. ‘Someone you know?’
He glanced at her, frowning a little. ‘You could say that.’
Her heart sank further as a premonition took hold.
‘Jamie,’ he said, and when the car pulled up, he turned to face Charlotte. ‘I’m not sure why she’s here. Wait here while I go and see.’
Charlotte’s chest seemed to tighten. ‘You want me to wait in the car while you talk to your ex-wife?’ She shook her head. ‘I don’t know who should be more annoyed about that—her or me.’
He grimaced. ‘What would you prefer?’
Irritation flicked at her souls. ‘We’re getting married, Dante. You can’t hide me forever.’
He looked at her with a sense of confusion. ‘I’m not hiding you. I’m trying to protect you.’
Her nostrils flared; she seriously doubted that.
‘From your ex-wife?’
‘I have no idea why she’s here. What mood she’s in.
’ Something about his statement had her pausing her own indignant thoughts and homing in on him and his mindset.
She knew enough to understand that his marriage had been an emotional minefield at the end.
And evidently still had the potential to be.
‘It’s fine,’ she said, glancing away. ‘I’ll go and get some groceries,’ she said. ‘Go, talk to her.’ She forced a smile. ‘This is none of my business.’
He nodded, accepting that. Her heart splintered.
She watched him get out of the car and walk towards his ex-wife.
She watched them hug. She saw him smile and she felt like an outsider, looking at two people who belonged together.
She felt—broken. As the car pulled away from the kerb, a single tear slid down her cheek.
Dante didn’t glance in her direction once.
* * *
All Dante could think of was getting rid of Jamie.
Which surprised the hell out of him. This was his one-time wife.
Someone he’d once loved. Someone he’d probably thought he still loved, up until maybe a few months ago, when he’d realised he rarely thought of her, didn’t miss her and had started to truly accept the necessity of their divorce.
It wasn’t that he was against the idea of seeing her again.
And he sure as heck didn’t want to hurt her.
But he’d been looking forward to getting Charlotte back to his place and pulling her into his arms and kissing her just like they’d kissed in Italy—often and thoroughly.
He wasn’t ready for the little holiday bubble they’d created to burst just yet.
Even when he knew it inevitably would, because this, here, was their real world and their real lives.
Reality would intrude, but he’d hoped it would be the kind of reality that shifted a little to accommodate the way things had changed between them.
The fact that theirs wouldn’t be a real marriage no longer mattered.
It would be real to them, real in its own way.
No love, but respect, friendship, sex, shared interests and a deep understanding of one another and why those barriers mattered so much.
And neither of them wanted children. There was more than enough here to warrant them marrying, yes, but also staying married.
After all, why mess with a good—no, great—thing?
‘Hey, you,’ Jamie broke into his thoughts, smiling up at him. But it was a sad smile, the kind of smile he’d seen plenty of before.
‘Jamie, have you been waiting long?’
She shook her head. ‘Allegra told me your flight schedule.’
He closed his eyes. She’d spoken to his grandmother?
‘I see.’
‘Can I come in?’
He glanced towards the door, surprised by how vehemently he wanted to demur. This was where Charlotte lived now. It was the physical representation of their bubble. But this was Jamie. A woman he’d shared more love and loss with than he could put into words.
‘Of course,’ he said, putting a hand in the small of her back as he guided her up the stairs.
He thought of Charlotte though, as he unlocked the door.
Wondering what she would buy at the stores.
Wondering if she was as carefree about Jamie’s being here as she seemed and hoping she was.
Because he knew one thing for certain. He never wanted to hurt her.
She’d known too much hurt and rejection in her life.
He would not be a person who added to that.
‘So,’ he said, once they were inside. ‘How are you?’
‘I’m—okay,’ she said, lifting her shoulders.
‘Okay, good.’ He frowned, not wanting to ask her what she was doing at his house.
‘Allegra says she’s nice,’ Jamie murmured, not quite meeting his eyes.
‘Jamie, you didn’t tell my grandmother anything about my relationship with Charlotte, did you?’
‘You mean the fact that it’s fake?’ The words had a hint of something in them, something he’d never heard from Jamie. Anger? Accusation?
‘It’s not fake.’
‘Right, but you’re not in love.’
He’d never love anyone again. That was a mantra he’d held close to his chest for so long, it had weaved its way into his being, so it didn’t occur to him to dispute that.
‘It’s just a practical marriage, right? Something to do with your business, I’m guessing. Everything always comes down to that for you.’ There was bitterness in her voice.
‘In fact, it’s Charlotte’s business,’ he said, distractedly, because his mind was starting to rattle and screech. There was an odd, panicked background hum going through his mind, making it impossible to think straight.
‘Charlotte’s business? You’re doing this to help her?’
He forced himself to focus. Or try to. ‘It’s mutually beneficial.’
She frowned. ‘Okay then. Well, that’s not why I’m here, anyway.’
‘No?’
‘I wanted to tell you my news.’
‘You have news?’
‘I’m adopting.’
He stared at her, surprised. ‘You are?’
‘Yes. I was hoping I would meet someone else, someone to do this with but...something about the fact you’re moving on, marrying someone else, made me realise that I’ve been living my life in a kind of stasis, just waiting for everything to change.
It’s not going to. I can’t have kids, Dante. I can’t. My body just won’t cooperate.’
He grimaced, old griefs and guilts swirling through him.
‘It’s taken me a long time, but I accept it. And the truth is, I’m excited again. Somewhere out there is a baby, or a toddler, a little person who needs me, and we’re about to become a family. At least, we will once I’ve jumped through all the legal hoops,’ she added with a small laugh.
‘I’m happy for you, Jamie,’ he said, lifting a hand and putting it on her shoulder.
Once upon a time, she’d been his other half.
At least, he’d thought she had, but then again, his experience had been limited.
In fact, the more he thought about it, the more he realised that wasn’t the case.
She wasn’t his other half. She had been someone in his life, someone he cared for and wanted to make happy, but they’d never stood toe to toe, arm in arm, meeting life’s challenges together.
They’d never been partners, in the true sense of the word.
He drew in a shallow breath, as something in his noisy, cacophonous brain shouted at him, demanding to be examined.
Something about other halves and people who completed you in every way, something he refused to think about or focus on.
Now or ever. Because if a relationship breakdown with someone who wasn’t your other half had the power to wound you as theirs had him, how bad would it be with your true soulmate?
‘I know the timing is lousy,’ she said. ‘I mean, you’ve just gone and spent a week with Allegra.
It’s just...’ She tapered off, shrugging her shoulders.
‘This is you and me, Dante. As it turns out, I wasn’t really looking to meet someone else.
’ She sucked in a deep breath. ‘I can’t imagine raising a child without you.
Whenever I think about it, think about my family, you’re there with me.
A part of it. A part of me. I know what you said back then, when I brought this up. ..’