Chapter 39 #3
Kai, with the biggest grin I’ve ever seen. Kai, looking at me like I’m everything he’s ever wanted. His beautiful eyes don’t look empty anymore; they’re alive, sparkling with… something that makes my breath catch.
An emotion that looks just perfect on him.
Joy.
“There you are,” he says, still grinning. “Why didn’t you answer when I called?”
Frowning, I glance down at my phone. Three missed calls. “I didn’t hear. I’m sorry,” I mumble, and before I can stop myself, I throw my arms around him.
I hear you now, Kai.
He clearly wasn’t expecting it. His massive frame stumbles back, too big for this house, and we both go tumbling to the floor. But I don’t let go.
“Don’t let go,” I whisper, my face pressed against his chest, clutching him like he’ll disappear, because I’m certain he eventually will.
His arms come around me, steadying me. “I won’t do that again,” he says, his voice soft but certain.
I pull back just enough to look at him. His eyes look so bright now as they hold mine. Freckles dot his nose and cheeks, and I can’t help but cup his face in my hands. “I can’t believe… you’re here,” I say, my voice breaking.
Kai doesn’t answer. He just looks at me, his expression softening.
“You… aren’t really here, are you?” I ask, the question ripping itself from my chest.
His silence is answer enough. After a long moment, he shakes his head.
“Why is this happening?” I whisper, my voice cracking, tears spilling over again. “Am I going insane?”
Kai reaches up, his hand brushing my cheek, wiping away a tear. “Sometimes,” he says softly, “you have to lose your mind before you come back to your senses.”
“Kai… I—” I’m about to tell him. Everything. Everything I’ve wanted to say for so long. I’m about to tell him how much I love him, how much I don’t want him to leave.
But he stops me. “I know,” he says, his voice gentle. He takes my hand, his grip warm, steadying. “Tell me later.”
He pulls us both to our feet, and when I look outside, there’s a sunset. A beautiful, warm sunset that paints the sky with deep oranges and soft purples, bleeding into each other like one of Mason’s old watercolour palettes. But… how? It was morning just moments ago. Does it have to end so quickly?
Kai looks at the sunset, a quiet smile playing on his lips. But I look at him. The way the light frames his face, the warmth in his eyes.
And I just know I’ll see him in every sunset from now on.
But when he turns back to me, something shifts. Slowly, impossibly, he starts to fade.
“Kai!” I yell, panic clawing at my chest. “Kai, no!”
I try to grab him, to hold onto him, but my hands pass through empty air. He’s slipping away. Just like his memories did. Falling away like leaves from a tree, one by one until there’s nothing left.
“Not now,” I whisper, desperation breaking my voice. “Not now. I’m not ready!”
But it’s not just him. The walls of the house dissolve, the voices upstairs fade. The warmth, the light, all of it begins to unravel, and the perfect world… the one I wanted to believe so desperately was real slowly begins to go cold.
Begins to turn ugly.
Everything except the sunset, still lingering in the sky.
For a few moments, I watch the sun set alone, knowing it will never rise for us again.
***
The light fades, everything disappears. To put it simply, there’s nothing here.
Just darkness. And it’s cold, so cold it’s almost sharp, biting, as if it’s trying to carve its way into my bones.
It’s endless too, like I could scream and the sound would never find anything to reach.
I don’t know how long I’ve been here—a moment, an eternity?
It doesn’t matter. If this is a nightmare, I want out.
I want to wake up.
Then, out of the void, a figure emerges.
My breath catches in my throat, my heart pounding so hard it feels like it might shatter. Just a dream. Just a dream. Just a dream. The words repeat over and over in my mind like a prayer.
But the figure comes closer, and I can’t move. My legs buckle, and I fall back, scrambling, until a laugh cuts through the suffocating silence.
“Lighten up, Addie. It looks like you’ve seen a ghost.”
That voice. My heart stops and starts again in the same beat, disbelief coursing through me.
“Will?” I whisper, the name a fragile thing on my lips.
He steps closer, and now I can see him. The whites of his hair, and the dark bits in his eyes. He looks exactly as I remember him.
Like he didn’t die. Yet, at the same time, not at all. It’s something I can’t quite put my finger on, but it’s there.
“You don’t look surprised,” he says, tilting his head, his smirk as sharp and cocky as ever. “Seen a lot of ghosts lately?”
I can’t help it. I laugh, a short, broken sound. “I—well, yes.”
His grin widens.
“It’s just like you to make a dramatic entrance,” I manage, my voice trembling.
He chuckles, and it’s so achingly familiar that it hurts. “Had to.”
I’m not surprised to see him. Not really. But I don’t know what to say. How do you talk to someone you’ve already mourned so recently? Someone you’ve cried for not even hours before? But he’s here. He’s here, and I’ve missed him.
“Where are we?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper.
Will steps closer, crouching down until his face is level with mine. His black eyes hold mine. “Where do you think?” he says, his voice low, almost… gentle.
Then the smirk returns, curling at the corner of his lips. “Don’t worry, Addie. Believe it or not, this isn’t hell.”
His smirk shouldn’t belong to someone who’s dead. But of course, it’s Will. I shouldn’t be surprised.
“I must be crazy,” I say, forcing a laugh to keep the tears at bay. “To make this up in my head.”
“Maybe you are,” he says, tilting his head as if genuinely considering it. “Embrace it, darling.”
To my surprise, I laugh. A real, startled laugh, and he grins like he’s won something.
He sighs, his expression softening. “How’s my sister doing?”
“She just lost her favourite person. She’s grieving,” I say, my voice trembling. As much as she claimed to hate him, he was and has always been family.
Will’s smirk flickers, but it doesn’t disappear. “Favourite person, huh? I like the sound of that.”
I roll my eyes, though tears prick at them. “You gave up your life to save hers,” I say softly.
He stands then, looking down at me with something that almost resembles peace. “She never got a chance to live,” he says simply. He extends a hand, pulling me to my feet. “And I… am satisfied with the way I did.”
I can’t help but stare at that.
He must see the look on my face, because he smiles faintly. “I found a family,” he says. “She did not.” His gaze flickers to me, softening as he does so. “She does now, though.”
My throat tightens, and I swallow hard. “You really loved them, didn’t you?
” Will’s expression grows distant, his black eyes clouding.
“Kai, Liam, Christian. They were your family,” I state.
Anyone with eyes would be able to tell how close they were, how much he really cared.
And Will… he doesn’t love perfectly, or even well, but he loves.
I’m just now beginning to understand that.
“You didn’t want to leave them,” I say. “Or Kym.”
He doesn’t answer at first. Then, finally, he nods. “No, I didn’t.”
I take a step closer, needing to ask, needing to hear it. “You’ll be okay. Won’t you?”
His grin returns, faint but reassuring. “Of course I will. You can’t get rid of me that easy, Ross.”
Despite the tears burning my eyes, I smile. “Never doubted you for a second, Carson.”
“Tell Kym I’m sorry. Truly.” His smirk fades, replaced by something quieter, more sincere.
My voice wavers. “And that you love her?”
He hesitates, but then, he nods.
I step forward hesitantly, wrapping my arms around him. “A hug from everyone,” I whisper into his shoulder.
For a moment, he’s still. Then, slowly, his arms come around me, holding me as tightly as I hold him.