Chapter Six #2
It’s my turn to sigh; the suggestion insults me to my core, and don’t bother turning to face him. “I’m busy, I don’t need any more friends.”
The silence stretches out behind me before he huffs a frustrated breath. “I know how it looks, and I’m not making excuses, because I own it, Breanna. I snuck away after telling you I wouldn’t go, but I had nothing to offer you. Don’t you see I couldn’t let you give up school to stay here with me?”
Something in me snaps. He’s just reduced my dream of making a life and growing old together to a simple decision to make sure I went to school.
It would have been different if we could have come to a mutual decision to stay together and keep in touch until I finished school and he discharged.
Even if we fought and I was mad at him, we could have worked it out.
Anything besides the radio silence I got.
The bottom line is that it was easy for him to throw us away. He threw me away.
Frost’s nose bumps into my shoulder, checking on me as I stare down at my boots.
Anger slithers up my back, and my head is getting hotter under my cap as I try to breathe through the emotion trying to choke me up.
His big military boots are just to my left.
Fisting my hands at my sides, one palm is spared the prick of my short nails by the fat lead in my hand.
I’ll never tell him this, but it was almost four years after he left me before I went on my first date. At the end of the night, I couldn’t wait to shut myself in my room to cry.
His next comment tells me he is mistaking my silence for tolerance, maybe even consideration. “I know you think the worst of me, and I don’t blame you, but it killed me to walk away from you.”
Frost can feel my anger, and her coat twitches on her back and her ears flick. Reaching into the little pouch hooked around my waist, I pull out a small biscuit and let her take it from my palm as I scratch her neck to reassure her.
Clearing my throat, I finally tip my head back and look up at him, trying my damndest to hide the hurt on my face. “You think you just walked away from me that day?”
His eyebrows twitch, and he lifts his hand as if to touch my face.
“Don’t touch me.” I hiss, and he drops his hand again.
“You walked away from everything that was important to me; you didn’t even try. You abandoned me, the love that was my entire world, and the future I thought we had together. You betrayed me in the worst possible way, and I’ll never believe anything you say ever again.”
He winces like I slapped him, and I see the hurt in his eyes.
Clamping my jaw tight, trying to control the tears that are threatening, I take a deep breath. “Trusting you would be like walking the edge of a blade and expecting not to get cut.”
We stand there, our eyes locked as hurt, guilt, and anger clash between us. But my barbs hitting their mark somehow don’t make me feel better. Now, a spark of guilt flickers deep in my gut.
Guilt is the last emotion he deserves from me.
Taking a step back, I look away as I click my tongue for Frost to turn around with me.
“Breanna.”
For some reason, I stop. Even with all the negative emotions swirling inside me right now, his deep, silky voice still wraps around me and soothes all the rough edges. Keeping my eyes on the open door to the stable on the other side of the paddock, I wait to see what he’s going to say.
“I truly am sorry. I’m going to prove it to you.”
Giving him my profile over my shoulder, I say, “Don’t bother, I don’t care.”
The building in front of me blurs with tears, so I keep my back to him and lead Frost back inside. After securing her in her stall, I rush back to my truck, bypassing the house.
Just as I think I’m going to make a clean exit, my almost mirror image steps in front of me, blocking my path. Her stomach is so big and round that the curve is touching my belly. Marley grasps my shoulders, her eyes narrow and moving between mine.
“What’s wrong?”
Marley is the closest thing to a mother I’ve ever had. She’s the warmest, most caring person I’ve ever met, and since our mom died, even though she was only ten, she made it her mission to give all of us a happy home.
Fighting the urge to throw myself into her arms and cry on her shoulder, tears are filling my eyes faster than I can blink them away. The closest I can get to her comforting contact right now without breaking down is curling my fingers around her forearms.
“Is he anywhere behind me?” My voice is shaking.
Her confused gaze casually shifts over my shoulder and moves across the yard. “Mato?”
I nod and sniff.
Her eyebrows pull together as she brings her attention back to me. “He’s at the stables, but he’s watching. Why? Why is he watching you?”
Squeezing her arms, I sniff again. “I promise I will tell you everything, but I don’t want him to see me cry, and if I stay here any longer, I won’t be able to hold it in.”
Pressing her lips into a tight line, she nods. “I want to know what’s going on.”
A tear breaks free and slides down my cheek. “I promise, but don’t tell anyone else about this.” I choke down a sob with a hiccup. “Please, Marley, I have to go.”
“Okay.” She sets her palm on my cheek. “I love you. Call me.”
“I love you, too.” I sniff again and walk around her when she lets me go.