Chapter 36

Theo

Iknew it.

I knew I’d ruin everything.

I always do.

It’s my fault…I shouldn’t have done it. Shouldn’t have stopped my pills. But I didn’t stop. I didn’t stop them completely but I still messed it up. I mess everything up.

I’m a mess. That’s all I am. Dawson is better without me.

But he loves me. He loves me and I don’t know why. Does he still love me? What if I ruined that too?

Maybe he’ll love me again someday.

Someday he’ll understand.

Someday he’ll see that loving him means setting him free.

Set him free—be free—be brave—you aren’t brave—you aren’t anything—you’re nothing—you’re wrong…

Everything is wrong.

But soon it won’t be. I’ll make it right.

I’ll make it right and he’ll be free.

He’ll forgive me.

He’ll remember he loved me.

Someday.

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