Chapter 28
TWENTY-EIGHT
Devon
When we walked inside, my mom was standing at the stovetop and Sydney had disappeared. Blakely immediately jumped into action, helping my mom with whatever she was preparing.
No longer outside, I could smell myself where I stood, so I took the opportunity to excuse myself and go shower. Which was only barely big enough to fit me somewhat comfortably. I had to spin in a tight circle and be cautious of the bottles on the wall to rinse my entire body. And I had to duck down in an awkward position to fit my head underneath the showerhead.
Showering in there wasn’t usually a calming experience, but I found my muscles relaxing and my mind wandering as I stood beneath the steaming spray.
All I could think about was Blakely’s lips and how perfect and plump they felt against mine. The little mewling sounds that escaped them when my tongue slid into her mouth. The way her body felt beneath my hands.
Opening my eyes, I tried to will my heart to beat once again in a steady rhythm, but it was useless. It was sending all the blood in my body to my rapidly hardening erection. It was angrily red, almost purple, and I balled my hands into fists to keep from touching it.
That kiss was the last thing I expected and the only thing I’d ever wanted.
The reasons I’d kept my breakup a secret felt stupid after what had occurred. My fears seemed childish and irrational. She wasn’t going to disappear again. I knew that, but that didn’t mean my heart was playing along.
With my relationship with Piper between us, I had reason to keep my distance from Blakely and act aloof. I could guard myself from the heartbreak if the worst did happen again. But without Piper, there was nothing between me and facing the feelings I’d kept hidden for so long.
Plain and simple: I couldn’t stay away. Given every opportunity, I wanted to be near her. I could have let Amanda comfort Blakely in that hospital hallway, but I’d gone. I had to be the one to make sure she was all right.
I didn’t have to bring her dinner to her apartment either or stay for a movie. But I did because fighting it was fucking impossible.
Leave it to Blakely to decimate those walls I’d carefully built around my heart. Not to keep anyone out, but to keep those unrequited feelings in.
Or what I had thought were unrequited feelings until about thirty minutes ago. A feeling I’d never experienced before buzzed through me. I tried to put a name to it, and all I could come up with was giddy excitement.
“Fuck,” I groaned toward the ceiling and ran my hands over my face. One kiss didn’t change anything. People shared a single kiss all the time, and I wasn’t going to let myself begin to hope she wanted more until I knew for sure.
And that was the plan until I stepped back into the house, freshly showered and not smelling like wood and sweat, and saw Blakely laughing and talking with my mom and sister. Her smile was bright, and she licked something off her finger before she stuck her hands under the sink faucet.
“Perfect timing!” my mom hollered as she set two large pizzas on the center of the kitchen table.
“How long was I in the shower?” I murmured to myself.
“Well, Mom cooked the dough while you two were outside,” Sydney chimed in, sliding into a chair at the table. “You know, while you were showing Blakely your workshop.” She smirked, and I widened my eyes at her in warning.
“Sit, sit,” my mom urged me, pointing to the chair next to Sydney. She didn’t move until I sat in the chair and scooted closer to the table. She set a plate down on the table in front of me and patted my shoulder.
She was acting strangely, and the expression on her face made me anxious. I looked over at Sydney and glanced from her to Mom. Understanding my silent question—“ did you tell her?” —she shook her head and mimed zipping her lips.
When Mom stepped back into the kitchen, Sydney leaned over and whispered, “She’s Mom. She knows everything. And you two weren’t exactly inconspicuous, dry humping right out in the open.”
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell her to drop it, but Blakely slid into the chair across from me and stole all my attention. She pushed a lock of her black hair behind her ear and turned those stormy, gray eyes on me. My palms itched to reach across the table, but I dug deep within myself and found the will to refrain.
That was how dinner went. The women carried on a seamless and easy conversation, which I added to mostly with grunts and mumbled words every once in a while. I couldn’t pretend like everything was perfectly fine with Blakely sitting across from me. She was beautiful, but the moment I thought of the word, I realized it was wrong. Beautiful wasn’t a strong enough word to describe Blakely. She was breathtaking, stunning, perfect.
Dark hair fell in waves over her shoulders, and her full, pink lips were permanently set in a pout unless she was smiling. Which she seemed to be doing more and more. She’d done her makeup darker, smudging a color that was similar to her hair around her eyes, which made the gray stand out even more.
My eyes continued to take her in, dropping lower and eyeing the small peek of cleavage I could see behind her black shirt. Laughter surrounded me, and I jerked my eyes away before I had an unfortunately hard situation at the dinner table.
She’d always gotten along well with my mom and sister, so I wasn’t sure why, when I glanced around and saw them all laughing, it hit me so hard. Sydney had told a story about her college roommate, and they had all descended into fitful laughter.
But when emotion began stirring in my chest at the sight, I realized why my reaction had changed. I never thought I’d see it again—Blakely laughing with my mom and sister. And everything that happened in the garage and everything I said and her response, it had all made me hope.
My mom got up from the table and walked into the kitchen to start doing dishes. Sydney was the second one to get up from the table, claiming she had to study. But she didn’t leave without hugging Blakely, who still sat in her chair and awkwardly squeezed the arm Sydney had slung around her neck.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” I heard Sydney whisper, and Blakely’s smile was paired with watery eyes.
Sydney disappeared down the back hallway toward the room we hadn’t touched since she went to college a few months before.
“I should probably get going,” Blakely said, standing with her plate. She went to reach for one of the large pizza pans, which was half empty, but I stopped her.
My hand landed on top of hers, and her eyes immediately jumped to mine. I watched as she sucked in a sharp intake of breath but didn’t move her hand. “I got it,” I said, and she held my gaze for a second longer before she nodded and walked into the kitchen with only her plate in hand.
“Thank you so much for dinner, Shelly,” Blakely said, wrapping her arms around my mom, who stood at the sink. “Are you sure you don’t want me to stay and help clean up?”
With a soap-covered hand, my mom waved her off. I dropped the pizza pans next to the sink and pulled a container from the cabinet for the leftovers.
“Oh, no. Get home. I know you have an early day tomorrow. I’ll have Sydney and Devon help me.”
“Okay, but tell me how your doctor’s appointments go.”
“I will.”
Blakely nodded, and I caught her glance over at me out of the corner of my eye. I didn’t want her to leave. Or at least I didn’t want her to leave without saying a proper goodbye and with the promise that I’d see her soon. We had planned a trip to Houston that weekend, so I could take my mom to a few doctor’s appointments. And if it weren’t for that, I would’ve invited her to stay. At least so we talk.
Blakely hesitated for a moment before walking around the bar and grabbing her bag from the barstool. I closed the container and opened the fridge, ready to follow her out, when she stopped in her tracks and turned back.
“Oh, Shelly, I forgot to thank you for dinner the other night.”
I stopped mid-motion with the fridge open and the container still in my hand.
“You mean dinner last week? When you were here?”
Slowly, I slid the leftovers onto the middle shelf of the fridge and closed the door.
“No, the chili a few days ago. The leftovers that…” Blakely’s words trailed off, and I turned just in time to see my mom shaking her head. Blakely’s confusion shifted to understanding as her eyes slid back to me. “I see. Anyway, thanks, Shelly. I’ll see you soon. ”
Blakely turned on her heels and strode toward the door. It took me several seconds, but finally, my feet started moving.
“Where are you going?” my mom asked as I rounded the counter. She already knew the answer to her own question; I could hear it in her voice, so I didn’t stop to answer her. I jogged through the living room and yanked open the front door, only to stop on the edge of our small porch.
At the curb directly in front of our house, Blakely tossed her bag onto the front passenger seat, closed the door and stood with her back against her passenger side door, arms and legs crossed like she heard me follow and was patiently waiting for me.
Realizing she wasn’t going anywhere, I slowed my steps as I crossed the lawn. The night air had brought cooler temperatures, and goose bumps appeared over my exposed arms. Blakely seemed unfazed by it, though.
“You lied to me,” she said when I was only feet away, and her words stopped me in my tracks. “ You cooked me dinner, didn’t you?”
Her stare was unrelenting, and I couldn’t lie to her, so I nodded.
She unfolded her arms and held them out at her sides. “Why didn’t you tell me that?”
The best I could do with her standing there illuminated by the streetlight was shrug.
She stepped forward, and I mimicked the movement, taking a step forward myself and then another until we were less than a foot apart. “If you don’t tell me why, then I’m going to assume it’s because you wanted an excuse to see me.”
I had to clear my throat before I said, “I can’t argue with that assumption.”
She took the final step to truly close the distance between us and peered up at me. In a soft voice, she said, “You don’t need an excuse to see me, Devon.”
And rather than respond with words, I brushed her hair over her shoulder and cupped her cheek. My thumb caressed her jaw and her chin, tugging at her shiny lower lip, before I dipped my head down and sealed my mouth over hers.
The urgency to deepen the kiss and take her mouth was churning inside of me, but I managed to keep it soft. She tasted like the cherry ChapStick she religiously reapplied and like all my wildest dreams coming true.
Her hands fisted in the front of my shirt, and my other hand slipped around her waist. Her lips parted, and our tongues met in a slow, languid motion. One of those sweet sounds broke free, and I couldn’t help but wonder what it would sound like if they were louder, echoing off the walls as she orgasmed around my… fuck .
I kissed her thoroughly one last time and reared back, still keeping my hands right where they were.
“I can’t seem to control myself when it comes to you,” I said through gritted teeth as I looked down at her wet, kiss-swollen lips.
Those same lips tilted in a hungry smile, and she swiped her tongue across her lower one. “Feeling’s mutual. I…I didn’t expect it to be like that. I hoped, but I never would have thought…”
I wrapped my arms around her and pressed her against my chest. It was the best feeling in the world to have her in my arms, and it was bittersweet to know that it very well may not have happened. Had things turned out differently, she wouldn’t have found her way back to us. To me.