Chapter 3
Jen
Growing up as the only child of distant parents taught me self-reliance at an early age. What’s a six-year-old to do when their parents are home, but can’t be bothered to make a meal? You make it yourself. And I’ve been doing everything on my own ever since.
Finding rides to and from camp? Check.
College applications? Check.
Graduating with my nursing degree? Renting an apartment? Securing a job with benefits?
Check. Check. Check.
Which is why my relationship with Sloan is so perfect.
While he and I aren’t exclusive, neither of us has seen anyone else since our arrangement started and it’s the first time I’ve engaged in a relationship without feeling like my freedom and autonomy are threatened. Sloan gives me everything I need without pushing for more.
Dating a rockstar is a great way to lose your identity and I’m just not ready to go from Jennifer Hayes, RN to Sloan Alexander’s nameless girlfriend.
“So, this guy shows up at Sloan’s, pounding on the door when we’re right in the middle of things, and Sloan tells me to go upstairs.
When I come back down to check on him, one of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen is standing in his kitchen — and mind you, I hang out with the same sexy motherfuckers from the band you see every day, so you know I don’t make that statement lightly.
” I divulge the story to my best friend, Emma, while on the first break of my twelve-hour shift at the hospital.
I want to work in the trauma unit, but they want someone with more than one year of experience under their belt, so I’m biding my time on the nephrology unit.
I don’t love it.
My days are filled tending to geriatric patients getting dialysis, and while I’ve come to know some of them really well, it’s not what I wanted to do with this degree.
I crave the chaos of the trauma floor. Hell, I would have even taken a position in the ER if it had been available, but I’d needed to start making money stat, so I took what they had.
“Did Sloan say who it was?”
“No, but he seemed pretty tense.”
“You don’t think he was in any danger, do you?” Emma asks, worry seeping into her voice. My best friend is only a little younger than me, but even at twenty-one, she’s a mother hen, always looking out for everyone around her.
“No, it wasn’t like that. Tense, yes. But not like, scary, or life threatening. They definitely knew each other. Not a psycho-fan situation.”
“Well, that’s good at least. Hey, are you going to Noah and Sienna’s tonight? They’re having another bonfire after practice so everyone can get together before the guys leave for tour. Bri even got a babysitter for Riddik.”
“Yeah,” I sigh, knowing Em can both hear and relate to the sadness in my voice. “I’ll be there.”
The guys and their wives/girlfriends have become family to me. Thanks to our forced proximity, we’ve made strong friendships and it just sucks when the guys are gone so long. Tour isn’t just hard on the band.
Now that I’m seeing Sloan, it’s nice to have the support of these ladies as the guys are gearing up to go out on the road again for the next four months. Bri doesn’t want her newborn living on a bus, so the girls have banded together to stay home with her and Riddik this go round.
“When are you going to admit you’re in love with him?
” Emma asks, causing me to choke on my water.
Inadvertently, I end up glancing at the clock over the fridge and groan.
I live for these fifteen-minute breaks, but I swear as soon as I cross the threshold into this sad excuse for a breakroom, it’s like stepping into a time warp where everything speeds up.
“What? Who said I’m in love with him?” I sit up straight, coughing, clearly disturbed by my bestie’s question.
She laughs into the phone. “Jen. I love you. You’ve been my best friend for a long time. I happen to know you’ve been sexually active since you were fifteen. You’re now twenty-three and have never hooked up with the same guy more than four times.”
“What’s your point? I don’t hide my fondness for dick.”
“My point is, you’ve only had a fondness for Sloan’s dick for the last six months and him going on the road again is about to tear you up.”
“Yeah, well, you’re not excited about Ryan going either,” I argue. As soon as it’s out of my mouth, I know what she’s going to say and I wince when she doesn’t hold back.
“That’s because I’m in love with him.” I swear I can hear the duh she thinks in her head.
I roll my eyes, knowing she can’t see me. It’s a bad habit of hers I picked up. “I’m not you, Em. I’m not interested in settling down. Nor am I ready for my whole life to change because the guy I’m dating is famous,” I add in a whisper even though I’m alone.
If anyone should understand my hesitance to get more involved, it’s Emma.
I watched as she was hounded by the media as soon as she and Ryan announced they were together.
Well, technically, they got ratted out by the same media I fully intend to steer clear of.
Plus, I’ve worked too freaking hard just for people to think everything’s been handed to me thanks to my relationship.
“What life?” Em asks. Ouch. Her words land like a sucker punch to my gut.
“All you do is work yourself to death trying to prove that you’re good enough to be on the trauma unit, which those losers you call managers should already know.
You could transfer to a different hospital, but I think you don’t want to do that because it’ll take you away from Sloan. ”
Exasperated, I give in. A little.
“Fine, Em. I like him, okay? That’s all it is. And I haven’t transferred because switching hospitals after only a year doesn’t look great to future employers. It would make me come across as flaky and probably make my chances of getting accepted on a trauma floor even lower.”
“Whatever helps you sleep better at night. Speaking of losers, has Up-Your-Ass Adam at least chilled the hell out?” she asks, switching topics to discuss my manager who is an over the top, flirty, grade-A douchebag.
“Yeah, but only because some administrative conference took him out of town. I wish they’d leave him there.”
“If he knew you were dating Sloan Alexander, I bet he’d leave you alone. Not even he could think he stands a chance against Sloany.”
“Maybe.” Am I actually considering this? Back on track, Jen! “Ugh, you’re the worst,” I groan, recapping my water bottle and cleaning up my trash from the windowless breakroom right as the nurse’s phone rings.
“But I learned from the best.” Emma’s snicker reminds me of the hell I gave her when she was trying to gain the courage to pursue Ryan. One dressing room pic of her in lingerie and the man crumpled faster than a house of cards.
“Em, hang on a second.” I pull my cell phone away from my ear and take the call on the noose I have to wear — I mean the phone I have to carry.
“Nurse Hayes… mmhmm… no, I already told her not until 4pm… no… because the doctor said so… I’ll be right there.” I end the call and put my cell phone back up to my ear, willing this day to be over already.
“Em, I gotta go, good old Mrs. Peters is about to leave the unit even though she’s required to be monitored for a full hour after dialysis because she always crashes. I’ll see you at Noah’s tonight.”
I spend the rest of my shift — after bribing Mrs. Peters with crackers and ginger ale — analyzing my feelings for Sloan.
It would be impossible to not feel something for him.
I’m a visual person and Sloan…well, Sloan is a walking wet dream.
All the guys in the band are fucking gorgeous, but Sloan’s dark, curly hair and hazel eyes strike a chord deep inside me.
And I do mean deep because goddamn Sloan knows how to fuck.
Add in his military tattoos, the pecs I love to bury my face in, and his washboard abs, and then try to convince me there’s a woman who wouldn’t dive face-first into him.
But Sloan is complicated. Not two-faced, just hidden.
We have a passionate fling going, but it’s so passionate because there’s no expectation to fulfill.
It’s fun because it’s easy, and if I were to develop stronger feelings for the emotionally complicated sex god, it would become anything but easy.
Especially now that his friends and mine are all basically married to each other.
If this stays chill and it ends, I don’t have to give our family up, but if it gets complicated, I lose not only Sloan, but everyone else as well.