Chapter 18
Jen
I’ve come to hate livestreams. I can’t not watch them but they make Sloan feel so far away.
It feels like the guys have been out on the road forever and I’m ready for my man to come home.
Even knowing he obviously isn’t going to answer, I text him incessantly during the livestream, smiling as I think about him coming back to his phone and seeing one hundred and twenty-seven unread texts.
If I’m honest, a little part of me enjoys having the access so many others wish they had.
Besides, he says he likes knowing I’m thinking about him, so who am I to keep that joy from him? I text all the dirty shit first and finally get serious towards the end. He answers my last text around eleven at night.
How’s your voice holding up?
I notice you didn’t sing anymore after intermission.
Sloan 11:07pm
Noah put me on vocal rest.
Jen 11:07pm
Is it going to be okay?
(Also, can we discuss how glad we are that dick rest isn’t a thing?)
Sloan: 11:08pm
Yeah, it’ll be okay eventually.
And hell yes we’re glad that’s not a thing.
I’d risk it falling off at this point.
I’m so happy to be coming home tomorrow.
The three dots appear so I don’t type anything because it feels like interrupting someone. But then they disappear. Then reappear. Then they’re gone again.
Jen 11:11pm
Sloan?
Sloan 11:12pm
Luke showed up at MSG tonight.
Jen 11:12pm
WHAT??!?!?!?!?!!?
Sloan 11:13pm
Yep. He was waiting in our dressing room after the meet )
Maybe there are other options, but I don’t see them.
Knowing the whole story, I can’t advocate for anything except helping Luke and Sloan find a way to move forward — whether as lovers or friends is up to them.
Otherwise, for the entirety of Sloan and I’s relationship, I’d feel like I only had half of his heart.
Although I’m unwilling to walk away from Sloan myself, perhaps we can create enough room for Luke to be comfortable.
Being labeled as Sloan’s girlfriend has elevated the already intense feelings I had for him. Although I’ve not “officially” agreed to move in, more of my shit has shown up in his cabinets, drawers, and closet, and the tendrils of possessiveness are winding around my heart.
Adam finally backed off at work, but has swung wildly the other way, opening doors for me, averting his gaze when I enter the nurse’s station. He acts like I’m royalty and it’s fucking weird.
The media hasn’t said much, leading me to believe Adam hasn’t outed us to them yet, but I’m sure that’s coming.
He did tell people at work though, so work’s been a bitch for different reasons these days.
I just try to keep my head down and never bring it up.
I can feel all of my co-workers’ burning questions whenever they’re around me.
When Sloan comes home from tour this go-round, I thankfully don’t have any trouble getting the day off. By the time I hear his keys in the lock, there’s a cup of hot tea waiting for him.
“Welcome home, baby!” I throw my arms around his neck, pressing myself into him, relishing the feel of having him back in my arms. I hadn’t realized the need to claim him would be so powerful, but I’m really glad he’s home.
“H-y, -en,” he rasps.
“Shit, Sloan. I hadn’t realized it had gotten so bad.” He’s working really hard just to get whispered words out and a few of his letters are gone completely. “Here, come sit. I made you some tea.”
He smiles in thanks, but doesn’t try to talk. Wrapping the mug in both hands, he winces as he swallows the liquid.
Seeing Sloan in physical pain is new to me and I’m not a fan at all. His wince has me opening my messages app and firing one off.
Jen: 9:09pm
Hey Luke. Sorry to bother you so late.
Sloan just got home.
His voice is really bad. He can’t even drink lukewarm tea without wincing.
I think he needs a hefty anti-inflammatory but I already know he won’t go see a doctor.
Turning back to Sloan, I ask him if anything else hurts and am relieved when he shakes his head no.
“Would water be better?”
Again, he shakes his head. The fact that he isn’t talking tells me just how bad it actually is. Getting Sloan to stop talking is usually the issue and his silence unsettles me. My phone pings and I grab for it immediately.
Luke 9:12pm
I was afraid of this.
Thank you for reaching out.
Give me your date of birth and what pharmacy you use. I’ll call one in under your name.
I text him the information.
Luke 9:15pm
See if you can get him to gargle warm saltwater TID and he needs to take the anti-inflammatories only twice a day bc I’m writing the maximum dosage.
Jen 9:16pm
I will. Thank you.
Luke 9:16pm
Would you keep me updated on how he’s doing? Is he in any pain?
Jen 9:17pm
Yes I will. And yeah, he is but only when he swallows.
Luke 9:18pm
That’s good at least. Thank you.
Let me know if you have any trouble at the pharmacy.
Jen 9:19pm
I will. Thanks Luke.
TID is Latin for ter in die meaning three times a day and we might as well start now. I push away from the table and Sloan catches my wrist, arching a brow in question.
“I’m grabbing you some saltwater.” I slide my phone to him with my free hand so he can read the conversation.
He pulls me into his lap, his right hand sliding to cup my face as he kisses me. With his thumb on my cheek, he mouths thank you.
Thankfully, by the next morning, Sloan’s able to whisper without pain, but I administer the meds I picked up while he was still asleep with a strict warning to keep his talking to an absolute minimum and text Luke an update as promised.