Chapter 8
Sunday morning, Levi let him sleep in. Saturday had been the hardest day in Jon’s life, and he was grateful for the gesture. He was even more thankful that Levi had stayed in bed with him. He didn’t want to be alone right now, and that meant a lot.
“Are you up for something for brunch? It may be a little late for breakfast.”
“I’m not really hungry, but I could use some black coffee, and maybe some toast.”
Levi insisted he stay in bed while he brought him his breakfast. After a few minutes, he returned with a tray, with two coffee mugs, a plate of toast, and a bowl of cereal for himself.
“Levi, I don’t even know how to begin to thank you.”
“Ya know, I don’t need any thanks. I just couldn’t turn you out on the street. I feel like it’s my fault,” Levi stopped with a panicked look on his face. “Shit, I didn’t mean it like that. I meant…”
He was interrupted by Jon’s laughter. “I think I know what you meant, but none of this was your fault. I’m gay, and my family is homophobic. It was bound to happen sooner or later. Besides, I came onto you.”
Levi smiled at him.
“I just don’t want you to think that this offer came from guilt because it didn’t. Too many people in this situation end up on the streets and having their entire life go to shit. I was fortunate, and Gus never let me repay him for anything he did for me. He would always say, ‘we atone for our sins with kindness, and we repay kindness with kindness’ and I guess it’s always stuck with me.”
“Gus sounds like a really nice guy. Do you have to work today?”
“Nah, I don’t have to go back until tomorrow.”
“Awesome! So I can spend the day with you to keep me from being alone with my thoughts.”
“Jon, are you ok?”
“Well, not really, but I meant that in a good way. Like I wanted to spend some time with you, and I kept waking up last night and thinking a lot, and I remembered you said you like to go to the park to think, and I’d like to see the park again. I’ve been thinking, but I’d like it if we could go there for at least a while today, to see if it helps me think too.”
“Of course we can go. I’ll pack some sandwiches, and we can spend the day chatting and feeding the ducks.”
“That sounds amazing.”
Jon could see why Levi liked the park so much. For the next several hours, they were mostly alone, save for the occasional person walking by. He had brought a blanket for them to lounge on by the lake.
“Do you think I should reach out to them?”
“I wouldn’t, but that’s just me. You do what you think is right for you. I think you should at least give it some time if you do, but ultimately it’s up to you.”
Jon had expected this answer. Levi had already told him he hadn’t spoken with his mother since he left home. He stood up and walked over to the lake, tossing a crust of bread into the water, watching a duck race to it and have a fish snatch it away at the last moment.
Jon turned back to Levi. He had removed his shirt and was laying down sunning himself. He stared at him for a moment, captivated by his body. Jon had been so enthralled Friday night that he hadn’t thought of anything more than going home with this man, and yet by Sunday, this man had invited him into his home. Now he was fighting the urge to run, and he was worried about how things were moving. He had no other place to go, but he knew if he was going to say this, he needed to say it now. He returned to the blanket, removed his shirt, and lay down beside him in the warm sun.
“Levi, can I ask you something?”
“Of course.”
His mind went back to Levi’s words from the previous day, even though it seemed like a distant memory, as if years had passed instead of hours.
“I’m going to start by saying, wait til I finish, just let me get all of this out like I did for you yesterday.”
“Ok…”
“Levi, you seem like an amazing man, but I really don’t know you. I like you, but I need to take things slow and get to know you. We can go from there and see how things go. If you’ll let me stay after this, I’ll move my things into the office, and when I get a job, I’ll pay half on all the bills. I know yesterday you said that was an option, and I think that is the more responsible way for us moving forward.”
Levi was silent. Internally, Jon was panicking. Had everything yesterday been just an act?
After what felt like an eternity, Jon looked in Levi’s direction. He had flipped over and was lying on his stomach facing him. He smiled.
“I’m glad you said that. It took a lot of guts. I meant what I said yesterday. Of course, that’s alright. I won’t lie. I like it when you sleep in my bed, but I’m not going to push you into anything.”
“Thank you. Remember, we’ll still be dating, so my ending up in your bed again isn’t out of the question.” He said with a sly grin.
Levi smiled at him. “It’ll be getting dark soon. Do you wanna head home and watch a movie?”
Jon sat up. “We can. Let’s make it a scary movie. I can’t usually watch them, but I want to give it a shot now that I have a big, strong man to hold me.”
Levi laughed. “I love a good scary movie.”