Chapter 19
Hunter
Me
You okay, Theo?
Can I call you?
I left a voicemail. Did you get it?
read tuesday
I hope you’re okay.
You don’t have to talk to me. Just please send me a message to let me know you’re okay.
I’m really worried.
Please open the messages, even if you don’t respond.
delivered
I stare at the string of unanswered texts I’ve sent to Theo this week. It’s embarrassing, really, but I can’t help it. I’m fucking worried.
I haven’t heard from him since the day he hung up on me during our FaceTime call. At first, he was reading my messages, and that gave me some manner of peace. Even if he wasn’t talking, he was looking at them.
He existed. Even if it was in short bursts at random times of the day.
Now? Now, I’m not even getting that.
Delivered mocks me from where it shows on my phone. Maybe he just turned off his read receipts. Or maybe… No, I can’t let myself think like that.
Shaking my head against the thoughts, I sit down on the front porch and start to pull my boots on.
I know one thing for sure, and it’s that I’m not going to sit around here all day wondering. It might feel like I’m alone, but I’m not. There are other people in this town who care about Theo and his well-being.
After getting my boots on, I climb into my truck and head into town.
Daisy’s is slow this time of day, and my heart sinks a little when I don’t see Luca’s car or Austin’s truck, but I get out and go inside anyway.
Arlo greets me when I walk in. “Hey, just sit anywhere you want, and I’ll be right with you.”
I shake my head. “Actually, I’m just here to talk to Luca. Is he around?”
Arlo eyes me warily. “No. But I can tell him you’re looking for him.”
“Would you?”
“Sure,” he says, pulling his phone from his pocket.
He types for a second, and when his phone dings, he glances at it before looking at me. “Do you know where he lives?”
Everyone knows where everyone lives in this town, so I nod. “Course.”
Sliding his phone back into his pocket, he inclines his head at me. “Okay. Luca said to swing by.”
“Thanks, Arlo,” I mumble, barely sparing him a glance as I walk straight out of the diner.
By the time I’m pulling into Austin’s long gravel driveway, my heart’s in my throat.
What am I even supposed to tell Luca?
I just need to ask if he’s heard from Theo. If he’s as worried as I am. Surely Theo isn’t ignoring Luca too. I pushed him too far, I know I did, but I couldn’t help but worry.
If he’s still talking to Luca, I’ll be happy, even if I will be slightly jealous.
I pull up behind Luca’s car and park before getting out of the truck and walking to the front door.
Luca opens it before I even have a chance to knock. “Hunter, what brings you to our neck of the woods?”
He doesn’t sound upset that I’m here. Just mildly curious, if anything. “I needed to talk to you about something.”
“Come on in.” He steps back, gesturing for me to step inside.
Kicking my shoes off at the door, I follow him across the living room and sit down beside him. “Where’s Austin?”
“At work. Are you okay?”
“I think so. Why are you asking?”
Luca cocks his head to the side, his gray eyes locked on mine, assessing. “You look like you’re about to lose your shit.”
I am. I really fucking am. “Have you heard from Theo?”
Luca bites his lip, his brows drawing together in thought. “Not for a minute. Maybe a couple of weeks.”
Fuck.
“What’s that face?” Luca asks. “Should I have? Is something going on?”
I shrug, trying to keep myself calm and come across like I’m not about to fucking lose it. “I don’t know.”
“It’s probably worth noting that this is normal for us. When he first went home after he came and stayed the night here, we messaged daily, but then he started texting slower.” He shrugs. “I figured he’d just been busy with work.”
“I’m worried about him. Before—” My voice cuts off. “Before this week, I talked to him daily. We text while he’s at work, and then we call when he’s on his way home. It’s our routine. We do it every day that he works, and even more on the days he doesn’t. Every few nights, we FaceTime.”
Luca sits up a little straighter. “And you haven’t talked to him since last week? Did something happen? Did you fight?”
I shake my head but then stop because, truly, I don’t know. Did we? I mean, kind of, but also not really. He hung up on me, but I didn’t think his goodbye text was a forever goodbye.
“Wait, he stayed here?”
Grimacing, Luca nods. “Yeah, his last night in town.”
Those words make me swallow hard. He was right here, and I just thought he went home entirely. “Was he… Did he…”
“Did he tell me about your…” Luca trails off like he’s not really sure how to finish that sentence. “Yeah,” he says with a sigh. “He did.”
Fuck. “I didn’t mean to hurt him,” I say quickly.
“I know, Hunter. You don’t have it in you to hurt someone. Not on purpose.”
No, I don’t. I’d never want to hurt another person, and especially not Theo. “I’m worried about him. Last week, we argued, I think. I don’t really know.” Luca nods sympathetically. “And then… he hung up on me, and he hasn’t talked to me since.”
“Do you want me to call him?”
Please. Oh God, fucking please. “If you wouldn’t mind.”
Luca grabs his phone from the table, then searches for his contact before calling. My legs don’t seem to want to stay still, and I tap my foot incessantly on the floor while I wait for Theo to answer.
When he doesn’t, Luca frowns, then tries again.
Theo’s voicemail picks up, so he hangs up and pulls up a text thread. “Let me text him. Maybe he’s asleep. I’ve noticed he has a strange sleep schedule.”
You could definitely say that. I already took Theo’s choice away when I didn’t tell him that I knew about Damien and his scar. I’m not going to take away another by telling Luca about his mental health struggles. That’s his story to tell.
“I texted him and asked if he was okay. We’ll see what he says.”
“Thank you.” I slump against the couch, and Luca chuckles. “What?” I ask, glancing at him.
He shakes his head. “Nothing. Just… you’ve got it bad.”
I don’t even think I can deny that at this point. “Maybe.” I blow out a breath, trying to keep control of my emotions.
“Hey,” Luca nearly coos. “It’s okay. I’m sure he’s fine.”
I’m not. And if Luca knew what I do, he wouldn’t think so either.
“Give me a minute, and I’ll get out of your hair.”
“No rush.”
We sit together in silence for a second. I can feel Luca studying me, but I don’t even spare him a glance. What in the fuck is happening with Theo? It’s possible he just doesn’t want to talk to me. That would be the reasonable explanation, but it doesn’t make sense. Not at all.
Something in my gut doesn’t feel right about it, and I’ve always trusted my gut.
“I wanted to apologize to you, by the way.”
Luca’s voice drags me out of my thoughts, and I turn to face him. “Oh? What for?”
“The hospital.”
I shake my head. “Nothing to be sorry for.”
He laughs, like he doesn’t have a worry in the world. Like something awful might not be wrong. “There is. I was a total dick to you when I was in the hospital, and you were just trying to do your job.”
“You had just watched your boyfriend nearly beat your ex to death. I didn’t take it personally”
“I was pretty upset that you thought Austin was capable of hurting someone without cause.”
I shake my head. “I didn’t. But I had to ask those questions, you know? Wasn’t like I wanted to.”
“No.” Luca shakes his head. “I know that. That’s why I’m apologizing.”
I wave him off, but he narrows his eyes, and I sigh. “Fine, I forgive you, even though you didn’t do anything wrong.”
Luca chews on his bottom lip. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
God knows I’ve asked enough of him today. “Why didn’t you tell him?”
My throat goes tight. “I thought I was protecting him.”
Luca hums. “Yeah, we don’t really take too kindly to stuff like that.”
I bark out a laugh. “Yeah, I learned that lesson.”
“I get it, though,” he says softly. “Those photos were awful. He hasn’t told me what life with Damien was like for him, but those photos… Damien never did anything like that to me…”
My heart lurches at the memory. At Damien’s charges. At what he did to Theo.
If I close my eyes, I can still picture the photo of Theo’s torso. Can still see the stitches running from under his nipple, all the way across his stomach, and down to his hip. Can still feel the rough, textured skin under my fingertips.
It haunts me.
“I didn’t want to tell him I knew because I thought it would be a kindness to let him tell me himself if he felt comfortable.”
“In some ways, it was,” Luca says, turning sideways on the couch and pulling his knees up to his chest. “In other ways, it made him feel exposed to find out you already knew. And for a survivor, feeling exposed feels really fucking unsafe.”
I nod, my throat so tight now I can hardly breathe. I never meant to make him feel unsafe.
“For what it’s worth,” Luca says, “I don’t think he really blamed you. I think he was just triggered.” He goes silent. “He awes me, you know? He’s overcome so much, and with so much less than I had. I don’t know how he did it.”
I’m also awed by him. He really is the epitome of strength. The irony is that he feels the same way about Luca that Luca does about him.
“He’s amazing,” I say, since I’m not sure what else to say. Sitting around here isn’t going to do me any good, and I’ve already taken up enough of Luca’s time. I pat my thighs nervously, then push to my feet. “I guess I’ll head out.”
Luca stands when I do. “Here, give me your number. If he texts back, I’ll let you know.”
He hands me his phone, and I type my number in before giving it back to him. “Thank you.”
“No problem. I hope you hear from him soon, even if I don’t.”
I nod, walking to the door as Luca follows me. I’ve just cleared it when his voice stops me, and I turn to face him.
“You care about him?”
I nod.
“Good. Be patient with him. The things he endured…” Something flashes through Luca’s eyes, like he’s picturing all the things he went through, before he shakes himself out of it. “Just—be patient with him.”
“I will. I promise.”
“And Hunter?” he says when I start to walk to the truck.
“Yeah?”
“Be patient with yourself too.”
I couldn’t eat dinner. I just couldn’t shake the idea that something was wrong. Mom went to bed an hour ago, and now I’m pacing a hole in my bedroom floor, tapping my phone off my palm.
Pulling up Theo’s contact, I call him. It rings and rings, and when his voicemail picks up, I leave a message.
“Hey, Theo. It’s me again. Hunter. I’m really worried about you. Can you please call me back? Or just text, even. Just… anything to let me know you’re okay. Please. I promise if you want to be left alone, I’ll leave you alone. I just—”
A rapid knocking cuts me off, and I pause, listening.
There’s another sharp rap, and my soul almost leaves my body when I realize it’s someone knocking on the front door. I’ve only had to visit next of kin once—for a fire that I worked with Austin and Jasper on. We lost someone, and I had to deliver the news to the family.
That’s how I know there’s never a good reason for someone to be knocking on your door at midnight.
Not one single reason.
“Just call me, please,” I say, my voice shaky.
I hang up just as the knocking picks up again. I don’t even know who it could be, and my feet carry me down the stairs in a trance. My stomach is rolling and knotted, and I’m suddenly thankful I didn’t eat dinner.
There’s another knock as I approach the door, and I take a deep, calming breath, hoping and fucking praying there isn’t bad news on the other side of it.
I turn the handle and come face-to-face with Theo.
His eyes widen when he sees me. He’s been crying, and for a second, we just stare at each other in shock. I’m pretty sure my heart stops entirely and then starts right back up, tripping over itself as it tries to piece together how Theo is standing outside my door.
“Theo,” I breathe, eyes darting all over his face.
He inhales a gasping, broken breath, his terrified eyes latching onto mine. “I don’t want to die.”
My stomach nearly falls straight out as he takes a step forward and then another. My arms come up on instinct, and between one breath and the next, his weight is falling against me, and I’m supporting it all in my arms.
He’s solid and warm and here. But he’s shaking violently, and when I pull him tighter against me, burying my face in his dirty hair and inhaling the slightly sour smell of him, a broken sob rips from his chest.