Unclench Me Softly

Sacred Robe Laundering Instructions

Because spiritual filth still needs a gentle cycle

Wash on cold, like the heart of an ex who “wasn’t ready for this version of you.”

Use hypoallergenic detergent infused with lavender and abandonment issues.

Add one (1) rose quartz to the wash drum for energetic recharging.

Do not bleach. Do not tumble dry. Do not let a man who hasn’t unclenched touch it.

Hang dry by moonlight while chanting “I release stains, shame, and emotionally unavailable energy.”

Store in a drawer lined with affirmation cards, sage bundles, and maybe one vibrator. For balance.