Chapter 40
40
PAIGE
I’d just finished introducing Bridget to Lanie and Cole’s sisters when I saw Cole walk out the front door. It was odd that he was leaving, but it looked like he had his phone to his ear, so maybe he couldn’t hear.
“Who’s the vet you work for?” Harper’s voice broke through my thoughts, and once again, I focused on the girls at the table.
“Dr. Lasso.”
Harper motioned between herself and Bree. “We’re adopting two of the kittens, so we’ll have to bring them in.”
Bridget nodded. “Dr. Lasso is very good. I’m sure you won’t be disappointed.”
“Wait, Lasso.” Bree held up her finger. “Andrew Lasso?”
“Yeah, that’s him.”
“I didn’t know he was a vet.” Bree leaned in closer to Bridget. “Is he single?”
She laughed. “As far as I know.”
“How do you know him?” Harper asked.
“He went to school with Cole,” she reminded Harper. “He was on the football team.”
“Basketball team,” Bailey corrected her, and all of our attention shifted to Bailey.
She shrugged, but a small grin played around her lips. “What? He was hot, and I liked basketball.”
Harper snorted. “No, you didn’t.”
Laughing, I gestured toward Bree. “Are you interested in Dr. Lasso?”
Bree lifted her glass to her lips. “Unless he’s changed, he was hot, and now I know he’s a doctor.”
Harper shifted her attention to me. “Is he hot?”
I thought back to the one and only appointment we had with him. “Honestly, I don’t know. I wasn’t paying attention.”
“Oh, right.” Harper rolled her eyes and mocked me. “You’re in the I’m in love with my roommate phase, and no one else exists.”
Lanie snorted out a laugh, which made everyone laugh harder, but I still tried to defend myself. “That’s not true. I still notice hot guys. I just didn’t that day because I was worried about Hazel.”
Bree smirked. “Did anyone else notice she didn’t deny she’s in love with Cole?”
“I…” Oh shit, I hadn’t denied that. Looking around the table, I saw everyone’s eyes on me, waiting, expecting me to deny it, but I couldn’t.
Bree’s eyes widened. “Have you told him?”
“No.” I sighed, and my shoulders dropped. “I friend zoned him a few weeks ago, and now it’s awkward.”
“Just tell him.” Harper flicked her wrist in the air. “If it helps, he loves you too.”
I put my elbows on the table and leaned forward. “Did he tell you that?”
“He didn’t have to, Paige,” Bree answered for her. “We know our brother, and trust us, he’s been in love with you for a long time.”
“Incoming,” Bridget muttered.
All of our heads turned toward her, and with her head, she gestured toward the bar. We all turned in time to watch Cole and Jake take the last few strides toward our table.
Cole’s eyes locked with mine, and he came directly to me. I froze for a moment, unable to read his expression. “Is everything okay?”
“Luke just called me.”
I swallowed hard. “Why? Did something happen?”
His lips tipped in a grin. “They got him.”
I always wondered how I’d feel when he was no longer a threat, but I never expected to feel like I was having a panic attack. Emotions overwhelmed me almost instantly. All of the anxiety and panic I’d felt for months slammed into me almost as if Paul Lewis was standing in front of me, and I had no idea how to react.
“What?” I asked, but my voice was breathy.
“They got him,” he repeated. “Luke just called. He’s in custody now, and he’s talking.”
“Talking.” I shook my head, not making sense of his words. I knew what he meant, but my mind was overwhelmed.
“Yeah.” His eyes narrowed, and he reached out, wrapping his hand around mine. “Luke didn’t say if he confessed, but he said the shit he’s saying is enough to charge him.”
“Finally.” Harper held up her glass. “A reason to celebrate.”
My eyes flicked around the table, and I saw everyone smiling, their eyes locked on me. But it was too much. All of the fear I’d lived with for months pushed to the surface. Everything I kept locked up tight, all the emotions and memories came crashing forward. Shaking, I lifted my hand and ran it over my forehead.
Cole noticed the change immediately. “Let’s go outside. Get some air.”
He squeezed my hand, pulled me from the stool, and guided me through the bar. The cool evening air slapped me in the face, and I jumped when I heard the door slam behind me. Cole settled me against the wall, and I slid down into a squat, dropped my head between my knees, and took deep breaths.
He squatted down in front of me and put his hand on my arm, but he didn’t say a word. I didn’t understand how he knew exactly what I needed from him, but he always seemed to.
I lifted my head, ready to say I was fine, but as soon as I saw his face, I started to cry. Hard, bone-rattling sobs wracked my body. I hadn’t cried since the night of the attack when I was driving to the hospital.
Not one tear.
And now I couldn’t stop them.
Cole wrapped his arms around me and picked me up. I buried my face against his neck, knowing he had to be getting wet from the amount of tears, but he didn’t seem to care. He settled me in on the seat of the truck, but I kept my face buried against his chest, needing to feel him against me.
“I’m going to take her home.” I heard him say quietly and assumed he was on the phone. “She’ll be okay. It’s just a lot.” He was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. “Me either. Talk to you tomorrow.”
Then it was quiet again, and my body was settling, the tears slowing, but he just held me while rubbing his hands along my back.
When my body was finally still, he leaned down and spoke softly. “Let’s go home.”
I nodded, but I didn’t say anything. I should want to stay and celebrate with everyone. This was good news, but all I wanted to do was leave. I couldn’t understand why or what was happening.
I swung my legs into the truck and laid my head against the seat. I was exhausted. All the energy I felt only a short time ago, all the excitement of being out with people again, was just gone.
We were silent on the drive home, and when we parked at his garage, I finally spoke. “Sorry.”
“For what?”
I didn’t know why I was apologizing. Maybe for ruining the night, but I didn’t have the energy to explain that. Understanding, he pushed open his door and came to my side to help me out. Holding my hand, he led me into the garage and up the stairs to his apartment. The moment he opened the door and we stepped inside, I felt like I could breathe again.
This was my safe place.
Cole was my safe place.
I didn’t know what to do with any of it, so I gestured toward the bedroom. “I’m going to check on Hazel.”
Cole didn’t say anything, but he watched me, and I saw the concern in his expression that I hadn’t seen in a while.
I walked into my bedroom and kicked off my shoes, smiling when I saw the kittens playing in the enclosure. Hazel’s soft fur brushed against my ankle, and I bent down to pet her head before she wandered out of the room.
I had no idea how long I stood there before Cole came in and moved to stand in front of me. He handed me a glass of ginger ale and a pill, but I shook my head. I didn’t feel the sharp pain of a headache beginning.
“Are you sure?”
“I don’t feel like I’m getting a headache,” I answered softly.
He put the water glass and pill on my dresser and then laid his hands on my hips. “Then talk to me because I’m getting a little worried.”
“I don’t know.” I looked up and met his stare. “I feel overwhelmed, and I don’t know what to do with it all.” He watched me while I talked. “I imagined this moment so many times. The moment when I’d find out he was caught and couldn’t hurt anyone, but in my imagination, I was excited and celebrating. This is good news. Why do I feel like this?”
He wrapped his arms around my body and pulled me tight against his. “You gotta give yourself a break. Just feel whatever you need to feel while your mind works this shit out, okay?”
I nodded, and we stayed like that for a few minutes before I shifted back. “I think I’m going to take a shower.”
“Okay.” He gestured toward the living room. “I’ll be right here if you need me.”
And he would be. He always was.
In a matter of months, Cole had become the one person in my life who got me. He understood me, understood what I needed, and he gave it to me.
The idea that I was about to lose him slammed into me almost hard enough to take my breath away. I no longer needed to hide in his apartment. This pretend life we had built was about to end. The thought of that scared me in a different way than I’d been scared of Paul Lewis, but it was just as devastating.