Chapter 12
CHAPTER
TWELVE
MADDEN
An evening spent behind my drum set is my version of perfection. Lainey and Cori liked my new song, both of them giving me hell over who inspired it. I didn't tell them, and I won't. Instead, I'll just write about the girl I can't have.
Cori insisted on hitching a ride with Grady and his girlfriend since he was leaving anyway. I trust him to take her home. He's been my boy basically my whole life.
"Hey Mad, do you mind dropping me off downtown? There's something I need to take care of."
I knit my brows together, "Lainey, it's almost ten o'clock. The only people out downtown on a Monday night at this time are homeless people and drug dealers."
"And me!" She winks, "Come on, Mad, just drop me off, and then you can come back here and do whatever."
I want to push for more information, but I nod, knowing it won't do any good. No matter what kind of trouble Lainey has gotten herself into, I'll be there. Dropping her off, picking her up, bailing her out, whatever.
We get in my car, and she instructs me where to go, smiling the entire time at her phone screen. It's a bit odd, honestly, and I won't lie and say I'm not curious.
We pull up, and I'm livid when my eyes land on the white version of Nash's black Jeep. Drayton.
Is she insane? She's not leaving with him.
"Hell no!" I bark, flinging my door open.
Lainey jumps out, rounding the car quickly to jump between us.
"What is this, Drayton?" I demand, wanting to know what the hell is going on.
He holds his hands up, "I'm not here to fight. I just want to see Lainey."
I roar out laughter, "If you think this is going to be a way to get at Nash, you're wrong!" I yell. "Nash hates Lainey."
Drayton steps closer to her, making my skin crawl, "Dude, it's not even like that. I barely even know Nash."
Lainey's eyes are dark, and I can tell she's furious, "Madden, have you ever thought that maybe someone could want me just because? No ulterior motive."
Shit. That's not at all what I meant.
"I don't trust him!" I cry. My voice is desperate at this point.
Drayton pushes Lainey behind him, "Why are you yelling at her, man? I don't trust you!"
Lainey brushes her hand down the back of his arm, "It's okay. Madden would never hurt me."
She steps forward, "Mad, I promise I'm fine. We're just going to hang out here for a bit, and then Drayton will take me home. That's it. I have my phone, and I don't trust him either, so trust me when I say my guard is up."
I swallow the nervous feeling in the back of my throat and shake my head, giving Drayton a warning stare. He gives me a knowing nod, one that says, "I understand you will kick my ass if I mess with her." Lainey grabs his hand without another word, and both of them turn toward the park.
My skin crawls.
I open my car door with a shaky hand, slipping into the seat.
I know it sounds a bit stalkerish and weird, but I can't just leave her here. It's not who I am.
She'll flip out if she knows that I'm watching her, though, so I slip out of this parking lot and drive a street over, hiding my car in the playground parking lot. I get out and walk over to the swings behind some trees, where I can still see her, but she can't see me.
I sit in the swing, taking in my surroundings. Watching as Lainey and Drayton sit on a bench near the fountain. She laughs, and I wonder what the heck he is saying that she could possibly find so funny.
A sound pulls my attention away from them as I notice a soft glow to my right in one of the playground tunnels. I stand up, slowly approaching, wondering who could be out here this time of night. Surely not a child.
I climb the jungle-themed structure, reaching the tunnel from which the soft sound is coming. She sits up straighter, quickly wiping her eyes.
Avery.
Her phone falls from her hand, obviously startled by my arrival.
"Madden? What the hell?" She gasps, taken aback, holding her manicured hand up to block her face.
I've never seen her like this. No makeup, no three hundred dollar outfit, no arm candy.
"What are you doing here?" I ask, sitting on the opposite end of the tunnel.
"What are you doing here?" She mimics, avoiding eye contact.
Oh, nothing, I think to myself, just stalking a friend and making sure she doesn't get date-raped.
"Why are you here alone? In the middle of the night?"
She pulls the sleeves of her sweatshirt over her hands, "Do you always do that?"
"Do what?" I ask.
"Answer a question with a question?"
I smile, "You started it."
"It's only ten thirty, Madden. That's hardly the middle of the night."
I cock my brow, "I wouldn't want you here in the middle of the day alone."
Her face twists in confusion, "Yeah, well, alone seems to be my new norm."
"No fancy boyfriend to sneak into daddy's big house?" I ask, instantly regretting my tone.
It's no secret that Avery's dad is loaded, and it's also no secret that she's famous on Instagram. Most people will credit Carson and his social status, but I don't see her as Carson's girl.
I see her as Avery Sinclair.
"My fancy boyfriend hasn't really spoken to me in weeks, and daddy's big house is empty, Madden.
No family dinners, no friends. My dad comes around every now and then but can barely stand to look at me because I look like my mother.
I'm nothing but a reminder of everything he lost. So forgive me if I don't want to go home to my manager counting calories for me so I can make sure I fit in the next outfit for whatever brand I'm promoting. "
I look down at her. She's so skinny there's no way she should be watching her diet. Her words nearly pierce me. We don't have money, but I have my mom. When I go home, it's home.
"I'm sorry... I didn't..."
She starts to get up, "It's fine. I better go."
She grabs the keys to her Mercedes off the plastic of the tunnel. The harsh reality flooding into my veins that sometimes someone can seem to have it all on the outside but on the inside, they're empty.
"Avery, wait."
She turns, her eyes finding mine, the first time I've really ever seen them naked. "I'm sorry. I really shouldn't have said that."
She plops back down. "It's okay. I get it, and I'd hate me too. There's not much to like."
Wrong.
"Why are you here?" I ask again, hoping this time she will just answer me.
"My mom used to bring me here every year on my birthday."
I go still, wanting to wrap her up and show her everything I feel. "It's your birthday?"
"Yeah," she shakes her head. "It's not a big deal."
I scoot closer to her and cast a quick glance out one of the windows to Lainey, who sits on the same bench. Safe, for now.
"Why did she bring you here?"
"Because she said that birthdays were meant for fun, that no matter how old you were on your birthday, it was fun to act childish. She'd bring me here, and we'd eat cake and play on the playground."
I feel an emptiness in my chest for her. She misses her mom. I never really knew my dad, but if I did and then suddenly he was gone, is that how I would feel? Constantly missing him?
"Do you come here every year by yourself?"
She shakes her head, "No. Carson usually comes. He may not love me like I've wished every year that I've blown out my candles, but he does a good job pretending."
"Well, where is he?"
She shakes her head, "Not here."
I pull her head onto my shoulder and softly sing happy birthday, causing her head to lift and her eyes to shift in my direction. A single tear begins to fall down her cheek by the end of the song. I catch it with my thumb, swiping it away. Pulling my lighter from my pocket, I strike it.
"Make a wish."
She doesn't take her eyes from mine, softly blowing the flame out.
Nuzzling back onto my shoulder, she doesn't bother with small talk, and I still watch Lainey out the window as she leans in and kisses Drayton.
Maybe she really does like him. They both stand and start to walk back to his Jeep, and I fight the urge to follow them because the girl on my shoulder needs me more.
For the first time, I'm scared of how I feel. I think I've known it for a long time, with our stolen glances and the way my heart flutters with her touch, but with her head against my chest and her hand entangled with mine, I'm sure.
I'm in love with Avery Sinclair.
Maybe I always have been.
But it's no secret that everything has a price with her, and this time I'm afraid it will be a broken heart.
My broken heart.