Chapter 39
CHAPTER
THIRTY-NINE
NASH
After sitting in my Jeep for a few minutes, thinking about what my mom said to me earlier, I cut the ignition.
Don't sabotage every good thing in your life.
Corinne hasn't responded to my texts, and I haven't seen her since I convinced her to ride to school with me a few days ago.
Mom insisted that I leave the recovery facility to go find her.
She said, "You need someone like her. Someone that is going to protect you, fight for you, even if it's saving you from me. "
Realizing the shit storm that I'm about to start, I walk confidently to the front door and knock. Sure I could've snuck in, easily went through her window, but not anymore. I'm not hiding it.
Jovie's mom, Lauren, opens the door ushering me inside. Coach Clark is standing in the middle of the living area, with an annoyed look on his face, attempting to put something together. The pieces are strewn all over the floor.
"It's good to see you, sweetie," Lauren coos. "Jovie is just up in her room, if you wanna go on up."
"Actually, I'm here to see Corinne."
Coach Clark turns his head in my direction, and Lauren smiles kindly but confused, "She's upstairs. You can go on up, or I can go get her for you?"
I don't hang around for them to ask questions. I make my way up the stairs, passing Jovie's room, only to hear her calling my name and following me.
Jesus. This is why they call her crazy Jovie.
I barge into Corinne's room and slam the door right in Jovie's face. She yanks the earbuds from her ears with wide eyes, "Nash?"
Fuck. My. Life.
As if my restraint wasn't already weak as hell, she's gotta be dressed like that? The shortest shorts I've ever seen and a tank top that doesn't hide that she isn't wearing a bra.
"What are you doing here?"
I blink, feeling like an idiot. I didn't come here with a plan. I just came. It's a little awkward. Nervously, I fidget with the hem of my hoodie, considering small talk.
"Are you alright?" she asks, slipping off her bed.
"Yes… No…" I stutter.
"Are you high?" she asks, standing up to push my hair back out of my bloodshot eyes. "Oh my God, you are!" She steps away, pissed. "What the fuck do you want, Nash?"
Evidently, I made a mistake coming here. I didn't think she'd be so pissed. "I'll go… I just thought," I pause, looking around. "Well, I don't know what I thought."
"Why are you trying to mess with me?" she asks. "I don't know what you and Jovie have planned in those twisted minds of yours but leave me alone."
"Jovie?" I ask.
"Yeah, she's up to something. She had my car delivered from Chicago. How did she know that would upset me, Nash? Huh? You guys think it's funny, right? What happened to me is just some big joke to you!"
"No—"
She holds up her hand, "Save it. I'm not interested in whatever lie is about to dump out of your mouth. You guys have fun at homecoming. Enjoy it."
Homecoming?
"I'm not going with Jovie. I'm probably not going at all."
She rolls her eyes, "Jovie seems to think otherwise. In fact, she's probably down there right now steaming her six hundred dollar dress."
"Are you jealous?" I ask, a grin spreading the length of my face.
"No," she snaps. "Didn't really have 'Hoco with Hades' on my list when I moved here."
I sigh. Does she really think I'm so terrible? Of course, she does. How could she not? I think fast. "Hades rarely ever left the underworld, the sole time being to find Persephone."
Corinne crosses her arms over her breasts, ready to argue with me, "He kidnapped her."
"Yeah, but she learned to love him."
"That's a myth. I bet she was miserable. You can't force someone to love you," she whispers.
"She wanted him as much as he wanted her in the end."
She smirks, "Well, that's the difference between her and me. I refuse to live in hell with you."
I can't hide my smile, "Well, lucky for me, Hades was God of the underworld. He wasn't the devil, and he wasn't even evil."
She rolls her eyes, "How complex."
"He didn't punish anyone who didn't deserve it."
"Great," she groans. "Corinne Clark, queen of the Legacy High underworld."
"No," I breathe. "I want to come to earth for you, not force you to live in the underworld with me."
And I mean that. I want to be better for her, she makes me want to be better. She surprises me, reaching up to kiss me, the warmth of her lips against mine almost electrifying.
"It can't always be summer," she mumbles against me, reminding me of the rest of the myth, how the seasons were created. Persephone lived with Hades for just a few months a year, the winter months. It's like she's acknowledging that we're both going to have to sacrifice.
Unlike Hades, I wasn't going to live without her.
"Why are you here?" she demands. “Surely it wasn’t for a Greek Mythology lesson.”
"You told me to let someone in."
She pulls me down onto her bed to sit next to her, "So you just now decided to take me up on that?"
"No," I huff. "I wanted to before now, but it wouldn't be me if I didn't fuck it up a little first. I just needed a wake-up call."
"Oh yeah?" she questions. "What exactly was that? The broken arm?" She looks at my cast. "The fact that you almost killed someone that hasn't done anything to you but simply exist?"
"Okay!" I yell, pushing my hands back through my hair. "I get it! I fuck up, I know that. Everyone knows that."
"Fix it," she snaps. "Be the guy I always thought you were."
"I don't know how to do that!"
Frustration covers her features, "It's not that difficult to figure out. Maybe do the opposite of everything you are doing now."
Great, she thinks I'm a total fuck-up.
"You can start with forgiving yourself," she grabs my chin, turning my face to her. "You are more than your mistakes. Stop carrying them like a weight around your neck and just live."
"Why do you even care, though?" I growl. "You shouldn't care. I'm not your responsibility."
She rolls her eyes, "Then be my responsibility. Be something other than this version of yourself, because I don't want him!"
Pain grips my ribcage, crushing it until I can't breathe. Until I can't speak.
"I want the guy from the batting cage that looked at me like he couldn't see anyone else. The guy that kissed me like he'd die if he didn't. Be him!"
Tears prickle the corner of her eyes, but she doesn't let them fall. I feel my chest tighten when I realize that maybe I've hurt her the most. She didn't know what we'd done when we kissed two years ago. She didn't know that she was walking into school here with an enemy she didn't mean to make.
"It wasn't your fault," I admit, rubbing my sweaty palms down my pants to my knees. "It was easier to blame you than it was to blame myself. I knew what I was doing. I just didn't care. I wanted you then, and I want you now."
I run the back of my hand down her cheek, grazing her neck and collarbone.
She closes her eyes, taking in what I just said.
I can tell that she doesn't know what to say.
A knock at the door causes us both to pull away.
Coach Clark pushes it open, "Nash, I think it's time for you to get going. Cori needs to FaceTime her parents."
I shake my head in agreement but don't get up right away, waiting for him to leave us alone again.
"Think about what I said," I whisper, kissing the top of her head. “I only want you, Corinne.”
Jovie appears in the doorway, "Dad said that you need to go."
I push by her forcefully, causing her back to hit the wall opposite the door, "Leave her alone." I warn. "If anyone is going to hurt her, it's going to be me."
She looks at me in shock, following me down the hall to the stairs. "Are you kidding me right now! Do you think she's going to forgive you for what you did? The second she finds out, you will be nothing."
"I've done a lot of bad things," I grit out. "But so have you, Jovie. Remember that. One conversation, and you are kicked out of Legacy for good. So keep your mouth shut, unless you’re on your knees."
She uses her palm to hit my chest, "Fuck you, Nash."
I laugh, but there isn't a hint of humor in it, "Been there, done that. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone."
I wake to my alarm at nine o'clock and get up off Carson's couch in the basement. We did an Xbox live stream until we could barely hold our eyes open. It was good to keep my mind off of things.
Carson is still passed out on the other end of the couch, so I leave him there and head out. I need to run home and shower before heading to work. It's just down the street, but my irritation grows when I see Drayton's Jeep where I usually park and Madden's Honda in my fucking way.
And lucky me, Madden and Lainey are walking out to it.
I push my door open, "Enjoy your threesome, ladies?"
Before I even blink, Madden charges me. "This ends here. Right now."
"Now Madden.” I tsk. “Let's not get our panties in a wad."
I shrug his hand off my shirt and leave them both standing there.
I don’t have time to deal with this right now anyway. Plus, I'm trying to not be an asshole at the moment, so I do my best to avoid Drayton. He's in the bathroom, though. The guy spends more time fixing his hair than a chick. I slip past, trying to get to my room without a confrontation.
"Stop," he chases me into my room. "You can't keep us apart, you know."
I roll my eyes, "What makes you think I'm keeping you apart? Maybe Lainey just needs someone to blame because she's too scared to pull the trigger to break up with you herself."
He backs away, and I show him how uninvested I am in this conversation by shutting myself in the bathroom. I wasn't nice, but I didn't tell him I knew about his dad. So progress, maybe?
An hour later, I'm walking into the Marina, and half of my shift goes by before I know it. It's busy on Saturdays, and I've tied up and fueled boat after boat.
Carson's Halloween party is probably in full swing by now, judging by all the pictures gracing my Instagram feed.
Avery and Jovie wear skimpy outfits, dressed as an angel and devil.
Lainey and Drayton are Bonnie and Clyde, and then Madden and Lainey.
The skull makeup he's got on is actually pretty badass.
No pictures at all of Corinne. She doesn't like to be in them.
I click through everyone’s Instagram stories, watching as the world moves on without me in it. When I make it to Carson's, I nearly spit out the Red Bull I'm drinking. A skin-tight Spider-Man suit? What the hell? I watch his stories one by one.
Everyone dancing to some banger that Madden and the band are playing.
One of him kissing Avery on the cheek, but the next one makes my eyes widen. What the?
I squint to make sure I'm seeing what I think I am and for once in my entire life, I feel betrayed by my best friend. My fucking brother.
I watch him kiss Corinne. I stare as he pulls her in by the small of her back. This video isn't from the party, though. They aren't in costumes, but they're close. Too close. The video ends, but whatever happened after that is what makes my blood boil.
A cruel reminder that as long as Carson is around, I'll never be the one she wants. Not really.
I'm not sure how—or why—this was posted to his story, but it's clear that someone wanted to get it out. My DMs blow up, and I click to see who it is. Hundreds of followers…
Can you comment on Carson's story?
Who's the girl with your bestie Nash?
I always knew Carson wasn't innocent! Funny how he made you seem like the bad boy.
Then it's like a bomb goes off. My phone is receiving message after message. Call after call. I hit ignore so many times that I eventually turn it off.
We're just friends.
Carson and Corinne's words ring inside my head like sirens. He lied to me. I feel my stomach drop and my mouth go dry before I need to run outside and spill the Red Bull I just drank over the edge of the dock.
I sit down, wiping the cold sweat from my forehead. I'd love to know what his version of friends is because it doesn't involve kissing in mine. He knew I wanted her. He knew, and he didn't care.
I start to see red.
Complete rage brews in my gut as I pick myself up off the dock and head to the party. I can explain to my boss why I left later on. Because, at this point, I don't even care if he fires me.
If I get pulled over going as fast as I'm going, though, I'm definitely getting arrested, no questions asked.
I make it worse by grabbing the bottle of Adderall from my console and popping a few of those.
There will be no sleeping tonight anyway.
I pull up outside Carson's house but end up having to park way down the street due to the number of people here.
The second I shift the Jeep into park, I get out and slam the door. My fists clench over and over again at my sides. If I see Carson right now, I'm going to break his jaw. I'm going to beat the shit out of my best friend, and he's going to deserve it.
The closer I get to the house, the memory of what I saw taunts me, causing pressure against my chest. So strong, it nearly brings tears to my eyes.
A force slams into me, and I nearly lose my footing. It's Crew, shirtless with a girl on each arm, obviously wasted.
"What the fuck, man! Watch where you're going." I bite out.
He laughs, pulling the girls in closer. "Nash! My man," he slurs. "You ditch work?"
I suck in a sharp breath, not wanting to make small talk, "Where's Carson?"
"He snuck away with Avery, and the two of them looked upset," Bimbo number one informs.
More vomit threatens my throat, along with a fresh wave of jealousy. He has Avery. Why the hell couldn't he leave the girl I want alone? I walk around the side of the house, pulling the ladder from the bushes and perching it against the window.
When I get to the top, the room is dim, but I still search his room for any sign of a hidden camera. I come up empty but as the video replays over and over again in my mind it almost looked as if it was taken from Corinne's house, which could only mean one thing.
Jovie.
I march around the room, pacing like someone gone mad. I notice Carson's discarded costume on his bed and pick it up.
We're about to find out just how friendly they are.