Chapter 24
Gaping Wounds
Olivia
“Rhys!” I scream as his eyes roll to the back of his head and collapses to the ground.
Theo is on him in an instant, cursing as he rolls the unconscious man onto his back and examines him. I ride over to them and leap down from the saddle to rush to his side. Only to stutter to a stop when I catch sight of his injured shoulder and arm.
Dark blood soaks through his jacket and the Henley beneath. The flesh beneath is so pulverised that it almost looks like raw meat, as white bone gleams in the moonlight. It’s horrific. How the hell he wasn’t screaming in pain throughout that fight is a mystery to me.
“Is he…?” Dead. I don’t want to finish that sentence, terrified to speak the word out loud. It’s too final and I feel too emotionally raw and ragged. My chest tightens, my breaths harsh pants and my limbs tingle with the telltale sign of an impending panic attack.
My eyes stray down at the hilt of Andy’s knife, still flecked with blood. I killed someone, a human being. The thought causes me to tremble as panic squeezes my chest harder. I’m a fucking killer, a murderer, a monster.
“He’s still breathing,” Theo says, his taking on a strange clinical, almost cold, tone. “Ollie, I need you to grab a light and shine it on Rhys’s shoulder. Alex, grab my supplies and two canteens of water.”
With shaking hands, I do as I’m told.
Focus on Rhys now. Freak out later, I tell myself as I grab a small torch from my backpack and turn it on.
As soon as I illuminate the ragged mess of Rhys’s wounds, my stomach roils and nausea claws at my throat.
It looks ten times worse than it did in the dark; the flesh peppered with what looks like hundreds of tiny silver balls, some deeper than others as they shimmer in the light.
“Fucking birdshot,” Theo growls under his breath as he shakes his head and removes Rhys’s jacket and shirt. “Ollie, keep that light steady.”
Alex returns with a medical bag, and Theo wastes no time in rummaging through it. The first thing he does is douse the wound with an entire canteen of water, washing away the blood. I swallow against the bile singeing my throat and look away.
“I’m going to need your help, Alex,” Theo says, drawing my attention back to him as he cleans his hands with an antiseptic wipe. Alex nods and does the same before the two start the long and arduous task of picking the silver balls from Rhys’s flesh.
I turn away from the horror show, unable to stomach watching it any longer.
Last thing Theo needs is for me to faint or throw up when he needs me to keep the light steady so he can work.
Unfortunately, I can still hear the sickening squelches of them digging the metal from Rhys’s flesh.
I grit my teeth and keep my breathing steady even as my stomach roils and tightens.
“Rhys is so fucking lucky this is the extent of the damage,” Theo mutters once the sickening squelches stop.
I whip my gaze to him, mouth open in shock. “Lucky? How is having his shoulder and arm look like mince meat lucky?”
He fixes me with a hard stare. “He’s lucky because it could have been so much worse.
A few inches to the right, and he would have taken the entire shotgun blast to his body.
He could have lost his entire arm and one of those fucking balls could have severed his carotid.
He’d have bled out in less than thirty seconds.
As it stands right now, he’s lost a lot of blood, but he’ll live as long as he doesn’t get an infection. ”
My mind seizes on the could have bled out in seconds part of Theo’s rant. It’s only then that I realise just how close we all came to losing him. Again. And I hate how terrified I am of that. I shouldn’t care, but I do. I really fucking do.
During this suicidal mission, my emotions have become entangled with these three men. Men I should be keeping my distance from. But they’ve burrowed so deep into my skin that I’ll never be able to cut them out. And I know just how this is going to end.
Theo’s sure he can get them to agree to share me, but I know they won’t budge. I saw the rage in Rhys’s eyes when he saw me with Alex and I saw the hurt in Alex’s eyes when I picked Theo to be my fake boyfriend. This weird four-way relationship Theo wants won’t work.
And I just know that when it all comes crashing down, I’ll be the one left to pick up the pieces of my shattered heart. If I survive it.
“Come on, we should get moving before any more zombies or Scourge members find us,” Theo says. He’s stitched up the worst of Rhys’s wounds and has wrapped the entire thing is clean gauze and bandages. He goes to pick Rhys off the ground, but I stop him.
“We can tie him to Bean’s saddle. It’ll be more comfortable for all of us and it’ll be less chance of reopening his wounds.”
Alex and Theo exchange a quick look before the former paramedic nods at me.
We haul Rhys off the floor and sit on top of Bean, who stands patiently as I weave a rope around her neck and chest to tie Rhys to her.
Once done, Rhys is sitting on her back with his chest lying against Bean’s neck and ropes tied around him so he won’t slip and fall from the saddle.
Perched behind him is Ketchup, having graced us with her presence once again. She gives the man in front of her a light peck, but he doesn’t stir, so she squawks at me. I roll my eyes at her as I gather Bean’s reins and prepare to leave.
Apparently, the magpie isn’t pleased about being ignored, because she flies from her perch to land on my shoulder and taps my head with her beak.
Sighing, I reach up to scratch the side of her neck.
She preens beneath my attention, leaning into my finger as I watch Theo and Alex shrug on their backpacks.
“We need to keep to the green belt and the outskirts of the city because I’m damn sure that’s not the last we’ll see of the Scourge and we’re not in any shape to fight them,” Theo says, taking charge in Rhys’s absence.
Alex and I nod in agreement before we all emerge from the back garden of the cottage.
I’m unable to stifle my gasp as I take in the cottage’s front.
It’s completely blown apart, with pieces of stone and rubble dotting the overgrown driveway.
There are body parts lying in the tufts of grass and weeds, staining them red.
Whoever caused the destruction must have been caught by the blast, killing themselves.
“What the fuck did they throw at us?” I ask as I stare at the grisly scene.
“Looks like a pipe bomb,” Alex says, sounding distant.
I look over at him to see his normally bright blue eyes dull and haunted.
He’s holding Rhys’s pack in one hand, the fabric stained with his blood.
There’s a slight quiver in Alex’s shoulders like he’s trying to keep himself together, but he’s fraying at the seams.
I know that feeling well because I’m dealing with it, too.
Without thinking, I move closer to him as we stride down the driveway and toward the main road. “Are you okay?” I ask quietly as I place my hand on his arm.
He glances down at my hand and blows out a breath. “Not really, but there’s not much I can do about it right now.” His eyes soften as he looks at me. “You don’t look okay, either.”
I swallow hard. I killed someone to save Rhys and I don’t regret it, I want to say, but I don’t.
Alex is too good, too kind. He won’t understand the guilt I feel at taking another person’s life and not feeling anything but relief that he’s dead and Rhys isn’t.
He’ll ask too many questions, probe me until my lack of remorse is bared to him and then he’ll realise just how goddamn broken I truly am. What a monster I am.
Because the truth is, that man isn’t the first person I killed. I also killed my parents.
Sure, they perished in the car accident, but it never would have happened if it wasn’t for me.
If I hadn’t started that stupid fucking argument and distracted my dad so he didn’t see the lorry until it was too late.
Two lives lost and all because my parents refused to allow me to go to a friend’s birthday party that weekend.
So fucking stupid.
I don’t realise that my thoughts have spiralled until hands are on my shoulders, shaking me violently while a male voice calls my name over and over. I blink and find two men staring down at me, eyes filled with concern as Alex continues to shake me.
“Are you back with us, princess?” Theo asks, peering around Alex’s massive bicep to look at me closely.
I blink again and nod. “Yeah, I’m back.”
They both breathe out in relief.
Shit. How long were they standing there, shaking me and trying to get me out of my spiral?
With a grimace, I rub my face and hide my cheeks as they burn with mortification.
I haven’t had a freak out like that in years.
I thought I was over blaming myself for my parents’ deaths and my survivor’s guilt, but apparently stabbing someone is enough for my trauma to rear its ugly head.
“Thank fuck for that,” Alex says with a sigh as he squeezes my shoulders before moving them to cup my cheeks.
He leans down and presses his lips to mine before I can even react.
He kisses me with fervour, pouring his fear and relief into it as his tongue tangles with mine.
My knees threaten to give way beneath me and I clutch at his arms, nails digging into his hard muscles as I press myself against him, wanting more.
His chest rumbles with a groan and deepens the kiss as one hand moves from my cheek to cup the back of my neck, holding me still as he ravages my mouth. The other moves down my back to my ass, squeezing me through my jeans as he pulls me tight against his hard body.
I moan as bolts of pleasure rush through me, going straight to my pussy and my throbbing clit. Fuck. It’s been so long since I’ve fucked someone. I want to climb Alex like a fucking tree and demand that he push me to the dirt and impale me with his massive cock until I scream.
Someone clears their throat.
I yank away with a gasp, remembering that Alex and I aren’t alone, and nervously slide my gaze over to Theo.
I expect him to look pissed or uncomfortable, but he doesn’t.
He has a huge, shit-eating grin on his face and his grey eyes are sparkling with a heady mixture of heat and amusement.
I cast a quick glance over to Rhys, relieved to see that he’s still unconscious.
Last thing I need is to have to deal with his anger and disgust again.
“As much as I’d love to watch you two continue, we need to move,” Theo says, shooting me a wink.
Alex whips his head around to glare at Theo. “That wasn’t for you.”
Theo just grins wider and pats him on the back. “Sure it wasn’t, big guy. You totally weren’t marking your territory like the big bear you are. But just remember, sharing is caring.”
Alex shakes his head, his face contorted into a deep scowl. “Not this time.”
“We’ll see about that,” the other man replies before turning on his heels and leading the way once again.
Alex’s hands flex by his side as he shoots daggers at the back of Theo’s back and mutters about how much of a pain in the ass he is. I move back over to Bean, take the reins, and follow Theo, not daring to look at Alex.
This is such a bad idea. I told them both that this won’t work and they still seem hellbent on pursuing me, anyway. Sure, I kissed Alex back, but he started it and when a man kisses you like he’s drowning and you’re his last breath of air, you can’t not kiss him back.
Theo is convinced he can get Alex and Rhys to share me, but after today, I know that’s not going to happen. Alex has made his stance clear; he’s not sharing me and Rhys isn’t even on the radar, no matter what Theo says.
Which means I’m about to come between men who’ve been friends for over two decades and potentially ruin their relationship. All because I’m a selfish, horny bitch. Maybe I’m not all that different from their ex.
“Ollie, are you okay?” Alex says, coming up behind to walk next to me.
I keep my eyes on the tarmac at my feet.
“Fine. Just thinking.” He tries to wrap his arm around my shoulders, but I duck out from under it.
Dammit, he’s not getting the message, which means I need to be blunt.
“We should stop whatever this is before people get hurt.” I hate the words as soon as they leave my lips, but I have no choice.
Whatever this is between us is only going to end in disaster.
“What? Why?” I can hear the hurt and shock in his voice and it tears at my heart. “Ollie, sweetheart, talk to me.” He places his hand on my shoulder, but I shrug him off.
I can’t deal with him touching me while I’m causing him pain. I need to stay strong. Their friendship is worth more than anything they would have had with me.
“I told you before that this is just going to end in heartbreak and I refuse to get between you and your friends. I’m not like her.”
“Not like… Theo told you about Willow?” There’s a strange tone to his voice and I risk a glance at him. His face has shuttered, his blue eyes dull and his face a blank mask. It’s a complete departure from Alex’s usually bright and caring self that it’s unnerving and sets my teeth on edge.
I nod and look away. “He did, before we got attacked.” Should I not have told him I knew?
Am I making shit even worse? My stomach cramps with nausea.
“It’s fine. I understand. I’ve had cheating exes in the past—” understatement of the year “—so I know what it’s like to have your heart ripped out. We can still be friends, though.”
I try to smile at him, but it feels more like a grimace, so I look away. And then, like the coward I am, I surge forward and move away from him, using Bean as a shield between us so I don’t have to see the hurt on his face. Or worse, that cold, emotionless mask.
My stomach roils with nerves and my heart feels like it’s a gaping wound, but it’s fine. It’s worth it. Their friendship is worth more. This is for the best, because any relationship between us was doomed to fail from the start. I’m convinced that it would have been a disaster. A painful one.
But if that’s the case, then why am I struggling to believe it?