Chapter 30 #2
I scowl at him. “What did we last night shouldn’t have happened and it can’t happen again.”
His brow furrows. “What? Didn’t you enjoy it?”
Oh, I more than enjoyed it. “That’s not the point. I told Alex I only wanted to be friends and yet a day later, I’m throwing myself at one of his best friends!”
Theo sighs, tightens his hold on my face and pins me with a serious expression. “Ollie, I need you to listen to me. Nothing we did last night was wrong.”
I try to shake my head, but his hold on my head stops the movement. “But—”
“No, let me finish,” he says, cutting me off.
He stares down at me with a sternness that would put Rhys to shame.
“You are an independent woman who’s free to decide what you do with your body as long as everyone consents—which we all did.
While Alex and I told you about our romantic intentions towards you, none of us are in a relationship.
You don’t owe anyone anything; not me, Alex or Rhys. Do you understand?”
On the one hand, he’s right; none of us are in an established relationship and none of them have the right to tell me what I do with my body.
But it’s not that simple. Not when it comes to these men and matters of the heart.
Our feelings are too entwined with one another, regardless of how much I’ve tried to distance myself.
“It’s not that simple.” I close my eyes and sigh. I’ve made such a fucking mess of this. “What we did last night could hurt Alex, and that’s the last thing I want to do. I don’t want to be like your ex.”
“You’re nothing like our ex,” Theo says vehemently. “What she did was bulldoze through established boundaries without a single care given to how it would affect anyone but herself. You didn’t do that.”
“But Alex—”
“Is a big boy who is the one in control of his emotions, not you. And sharing a few kisses—as hot as they may have been—doesn’t mean—”
“I may have also watched him jerk off,” I mumble, my cheeks burning as images of that night flash through my mind.
Theo chokes on a breath. “You—what?”
“It was the night we spent at the Lodge.” I shrug, trying to appear casual, even though I’m sure my cheeks and neck are bright red.
He blinks. “That exhibitionist bastard. No wonder he was stark fucking naked and smug as hell the next morning.” He shakes his head, a wry smile on his lips, but he quickly sobers.
“Regardless of what’s happened between you two, none of that equates to an established relationship.
If anything, you’ve made it clear you don’t want one. ”
“Sure, but that doesn’t change the fact that what we did will hurt him.” Just the thought of causing Alex pain is like a sucker punch to the stomach.
Theo sighs and slides one hand around to cup the back of my head while his thumb strokes my cheek.
“I won’t lie to you; this will probably hurt him.
” I wince, but he forges onward before I can speak.
“But I think this is what he needs to get his stubborn head out of his ass and see how good all four of us will be together.”
I shake my head. “We both know that’s not going to happen.”
“And why not?” He arches an eyebrow at me.
“You know why. Alex has made his intentions very clear and Rhys isn’t even in the picture.”
“You still think that about Rhys? Even after last night?”
My brow furrows. “Last night? What…” My eyes widen as realisation crashes over me and another blush burns my cheeks with a vengeance. I yank my head from his hold. “You knew he was watching?”
A slow, wicked smirk stretches across his lips. “I didn’t at first, but we had an interesting conversation after you fell asleep.” He winks at me.
I groan and hide my head in my hands. God, this is so embarrassing.
Theo chuckles and pries my hands from my face. “You have nothing to be embarrassed about, Ollie,” he says, peering down at me with amusement. “Everyone enjoyed what happened last night and I’m pretty sure watching you come on my fingers is swaying him towards this relationship.”
My cheeks continue to blaze as I shiver and my clit throbs at the memory of last night. Rhys looked at me with so much heat and when he told me to come, everything crashed over me. It’s probably the hottest experience of my life and my body is begging for a repeat.
But doubts swirl in the back of my mind, cooling my desire. “Are you sure he…?”
“He wants you, baby. There’s no doubt about that,” Theo says, answering the question I’m too afraid to finish as he tenderly brushes tendrils of my hair from my face.
“He’ll come around; they both will. I’ll make sure of it.
” He must see the scepticism on my face because he leans closer until our noses are practically touching. “Trust me.”
Easier said than done. Especially since he’s asking me to trust him with more than just my body and my life. He wants my heart. The last time I trusted a man with that, he tore it out and stomped on it in front of a church full of people. And then the zombie apocalypse happened.
I should’ve stuck to my original plan and kept my distance, but it’s too damn late. I’ve done the one thing I told myself I’d never do again; I allowed these men access to my heart. I felt it the night Rhys was shot, and it’s only got worse since.
“Trust me, Ollie,” Theo says again as he closes the distance between us and kisses me sweetly on the lips.
My eyes flutter closed and I melt into him.
I never knew how addictive it is to have someone treat me with so much care and affection until now.
It makes me realise just how hollow and cold my previous relationships were.
“As cosy as this is, we have shit to do.” Rhys’s voice from behind startles me and my eyes practically pop out of my head as I jerk away from the kiss.
“How long has he been there?” I whisper to Theo, not daring to look at the man in question. Did he hear me ask about him and his potential attraction to me?
“Long enough,” Rhys answers with smug amusement.
I groan. Yup, really wishing for that hole right now.
Theo chuckles and presses a kiss to the top of my head. “He’s right, we should get moving and start preparing for tonight,” he says before slipping out from beneath me.
Shit, I completely forgot about the fight tonight.
Unable to meet Rhys’s knowing gaze, I slide out of my sleeping bag—thankful that I sleep in leggings—and shove on my boots.
Heavy footsteps on the stairs alert me to an incoming Alex and, not wanting to face him just yet, I hurry to the back door.
The click of nails on the floor tells me Harlow’s finally gracing me with her presence as I step outside in to the frosty morning.
My breath fogs in the icy air and I shiver as I crunch across the abandoned car park to the field where Bean is grazing.
I should have brought a jacket, but there’s no way in hell I’m stepping back into that shop, not with how messed up everything is.
So I grit my teeth and spend the rest of the day preparing myself mentally and physically for the fight tonight.
Relationship drama can wait; I have a mission to complete.