Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
S he turned to see a Rolls-Royce slide to a stop.
This was happening very fast. She hadn’t girded herself for a party that included Felix. But her sons, especially Jeremiah, threw this type of curveball at her from time to time. She had to be equal to this challenge because she refused to let Felix dim one bit of her enjoyment in this gathering.
Her ex-husband approached dressed in clothing that made him look as though he was exiting the back nine at Pebble Beach. Most men’s faces turned puffy and began to look as if they were melting as they got older. Not so with Felix or Burke. Time was etching character, ruggedness, and masculinity into their already-great bone structure.
“Hey, Dad.” Jeremiah extended a fist toward Felix.
Felix bumped it. “Son.”
“Mom was just saying how pleased she is that you were able to join us.”
“ So pleased,” Fiona said.
“I can see that Jeremiah just sprung me on you.” Felix grinned. “Being as popular as I am, it’s rare that I have the opportunity to be uninvited company.”
“You might not often be uninvited company,” Fiona said with a beatific expression, “but I’d hazard a guess that you’re unpopular company more than you realize.”
Jeremiah laughed. Felix inclined his head in a show of respect. He exchanged air kisses with her. “You look beautiful, Fiona. Now. Who’s here?” He lifted his regal head and scanned the guests. He was wearing his gray-blond hair slicked back today, Gordon Gekko style. “Ah, good. Your family. They’ll be pleasingly offended by my presence. Jude and Gemma. And my future daughter-in-law, Remy. Outstanding. Lots to keep me busy here, apart from humiliating Jeremiah in the fantasy draft.”
“Help yourselves to food.” Fiona shooed them toward the buffet table, then made a circuit, checking on the rest of her guests.
Assured that everyone was having a lovely time, she filled a plate for herself. Burke came through the line behind her because he’d been busy pouring drinks and refilling the ice bucket. They sat next to each other near Fiona’s parents, Wendell and Marisol, and Jude and Gemma.
Fiona remained partially aware of her ex-husband, who was currently standing near a tree, holding his plate nonchalantly, and applying himself to the task of putting Remy under his spell. If Felix ever tried to corner the market on Fiona’s future grandchildren, it would be war. She’d have to obliterate him the way Napoleon had done the poor Austrians.
As if her gaze had summoned Felix, he looked over. She instantly diverted her attention to Burke, who watched her with a concerned expression.
Felix crossed to Fiona’s table and lowered into the chair at the head. Obviously, he’d concluded that sitting near Fiona would be the most fiendish of all his choices.
Both Burke and Fiona’s dad stiffened.
“Felix,” Fiona said calmly, “this is Burke Ainsley. You’ll remember that we were friends with him and his wife, Kay, when Jeremiah was at The Kellan School with their daughter.”
“That’s right,” Felix said smoothly as he and Burke shook hands. “Good to see you again.”
“You too.” Fiona knew Burke must actually feel that it was anything but good to see Felix again. Burke was Team Fiona, which meant by law he must not be Team Felix.
“Is Kay with you today?” Felix asked.
“Kay passed away a few years ago,” Burke answered. “I moved back to Groomsport more than a year ago to be near my kids and grandkids.”
“Sorry to hear about Kay,” Felix said. “I liked her.”
“She was wonderful,” Fiona said nobly. In truth, she didn’t dwell on thoughts of Burke and Kay together because they made her feel at odds with herself. In the here and now, Burke was very much her person.
“Are you two dating?” Felix asked Fiona, gesturing between her and Burke.
“No. We’re good friends.”
“You and Burke would make the cutest couple,” Marisol proclaimed, as earnest as ever.
“Burke’s the only man I know good enough for her,” Wendell said.
“I was good enough for her,” Felix pointed out.
“Until you weren’t,” Fiona quipped, keeping an upward tilt to her lips.
“Felix and Fiona had the most memorable wedding,” Mom piped up with a dreamy smile that spoke of old memories. “There were six hundred guests in attendance and what felt like acres of flowers. Even cameras, because it was televised live.”
Dad was too busy chewing to correct his wife.
“I believe you’re referring to Dad’s marriage to your daughter Isobel, Grandma.” Jude reached out and took hold of his grandmother’s hand.
Fiona’s mom continued as if Jude hadn’t spoken. “I’m delighted that you and Felix are still so happy together, all these years later.”
“As God is my witness,” Felix said, “Fiona and I are as happy as any divorced couple can be.”
“Here we are,” Mom went on, “celebrating your anniversary with this beautiful party.”
“Or,” Jude proposed mildly, “celebrating the opportunity we’re about to have to become cutthroat over fantasy football.”
“You, cutthroat?” Gemma met Jude’s eyes flirtatiously.
Fiona considered herself savvy at the art of flirtation, but Gemma was equally skilled.
“I’m very cutthroat when it comes to fantasy football,” Jude said. “And I’m not going to make an exception with you as my opponent.”
“I should hope not. That would take all the fun out of it when I best you at this.”
“Gemma, I will bet you five gallons of rocky road ice cream that you will lose to me in fantasy football this season.”
“Accepted. Now seal it with a kiss because this cutthroat side of you has me in a tizzy.” They were both smiling as they exchanged a kiss.
Jude and Gemma’s kiss inspired Wendell to give Marisol a peck. “Did you know, Felix,” Wendell asked, “that Marisol and I were recently wed?”
“No,” Felix said, then under his breath so only Fiona and Burke could hear, “having never seen you before in my life.”
“My bride has transformed my life with her love.” He placed a shaky hand at the back of Marisol’s head and brought her gently forward for another long smooch.
“We should kiss like that more,” Fiona’s mom said to her father.
“Darling, we’ve been married for sixty-four years. They’ve been married for two months.”
“That shouldn’t make any difference. We should still kiss like that more.”
“Fine. Happy to oblige when I finish eating this delicious lobster roll.”
Wendell and Marisol’s kiss ended with a smacking sound.
“All this love on display is making me think that you and I should give it another go, Fiona.” Felix shot her a wicked smile. “If you follow your mom’s suggestion, we can make this an anniversary lunch going forward.”
Gemma’s eyes widened.
“I would sooner wear Birkenstocks,” Fiona stated, “than give a relationship with you another go.”
“Your loss.” Felix shrugged. “Listen, this is as good a time as any to mention that I’m trying to recover Empress Eugenie’s tiara. You remember that piece of jewelry, yes?” He looked to Fiona, then Jude.
They both nodded.
“I don’t think it was fair of you, Dad,” Jude said, “to ask Max to find it.”
“I asked him to find it because I’m ninety percent sure Nicole or Max has it.”
“It’s possible someone else took it,” Jude said.
“Do you have any evidence of that?”
“Not yet.”
“Any theories about who the mystery thief could be?”
“No.”
“Do either of you remember anything that might help me find it?” Felix asked.
Fiona and Jude shook their heads.
“If either of you remember something that might help, or if you come up with a theory about the identity of the mystery thief, I’m all ears.”
The fantasy draft of players went swimmingly, if Fiona did say so herself. She’d been as strategic and vicious as she knew how to be and harbored high hopes for the season.
When the draft ended, Felix had thankfully left the premises. Her parents and most of her siblings had remained. They’d stayed so long that the sky had turned dark, and they’d dug into leftovers once the dinner hour rolled around.
Now everyone was gone with the exception of Burke, who’d remained to help her clean the kitchen. Her storybook house—decorated in shades of white, cream, and muted pastels—had a replete atmosphere at present. Fiona loved the productive feeling of a party well hosted. The only fly in her ointment was her awareness that Burke was not himself.
He’d spent time talking with everyone, listening in his stellar-listener type of way. He had the demeanor of a popular psychotherapist because he made you feel that your experience mattered and that he cared deeply to hear about it. Outwardly, he’d been mostly normal this afternoon. Yet she knew him well enough to detect the subtle signals that indicated he was upset.
The silence between them that usually felt companionable was feeling spiky. So even though many dishes still waited to be loaded in the dishwasher, Fiona turned off the sink faucet.
Setting down a tray containing empty wine glasses, Burke gave her a questioning look.
“I can tell that something’s bothering you,” she said. “What’s the matter?”
He didn’t reply right away, and she understood he was taking time to formulate his answer. He was not a man who spoke rashly or in anger.
“I’m worried that you’re still in love with Felix.”
It took Fiona several seconds to metabolize that. “What gave you the impression that I’m still in love with Felix?”
He positioned strong hands on the hips of the jeans he’d paired with a maroon shirt. “You kept Felix in your peripheral vision the whole time he was here. You seemed completely distracted by him. You . . . bantered with him. You became this very polished version of yourself. Even more polished than usual. As if you were trying to impress him.”
For the first time she could remember, Burke had said something that made her defensive. “It’s true that when he’s around I keep an eye on him and am distracted by him. That’s because I’m wary of him. As far as acting more polished . . . He’s always very polished, so I respond in kind. He’s not someone I can be casual with because I have to keep my guard up with him.”
“He joked about the two of you giving a relationship another go. You know that he could, at any time, apply himself to the task of winning you back.”
“He won’t. He only goes for women half my age or younger.”
“Fiona, he doesn’t lack intelligence. Even someone with very little intelligence would recognize that you are gorgeous and smart and successful and funny. Women like you are very rare.”
“Felix doesn’t see me that way. I was irresistible to him once but that was forever ago. Back before he started having an affair with Nicole.”
“I won’t be surprised if he decides he wants you back.”
“I hope that he does decide that.”
Burke looked as if she’d slapped him.
“It’s only in my wildest dreams that he’d want me back,” she continued. “If he did, then I could turn him down and recover some of the pride he trampled on. I would never resume a romance with that man.”
He didn’t appear to believe her.
Irritated, she dashed a fallen lock of blond hair out of her eyes. “You don’t think I’m telling the truth?”
His forehead knotted. “It’s just . . . after what I saw today, I’m troubled.”
“Because?”
He looked directly at her and spoke slowly and emphatically. “Because I love you. It would devastate me if you went back with him.”
Goosebumps swirled down her shoulder blades.
Once, nine months ago, he’d told her he was interested in dating her. She’d gently told him she wanted only friendship and that had been that. Until now. The power of his words reverberated through her.
“I’m a grown man,” he continued. “Not a child, like Felix. You would always be able to count on me. I would be faithful to you. I would share with you everything I have.”
She couldn’t recall how to breathe. “I’m . . . surprised. I was planning on us continuing as we have been.”
“I’m sixty-five years old. I don’t want to beat around the bush. I don’t have time to waste. I want to spend my life with you, starting yesterday.”
“The type of commitment you’re describing . . .” Her words trailed off.
“It’s marriage that I’m describing. Not a fling. Not living together. I want to marry you and be your husband.”
“I never intend to marry again.”
“Because of Felix,” he said.
She didn’t verbally confirm it.
Burke didn’t seem to need verbal confirmation. “You’re still letting him have a hold on you. You’re still letting him dictate your life.”
“The choice to marry or not to marry is mine to make. And I made the choice not to marry a long time ago.”
“Things change. You could make a new choice now because of me.”
“I could,” she acknowledged. The last part of that thought— but I won’t— went unspoken yet was loud between them.
Hurt showed plainly on his face. She didn’t want to hurt him. He was fabulous, her dearest friend. Yet she didn’t regret what she’d said because she’d meant every word.
He turned and walked out of her house.
Ivy
We haven’t seen you in several days. All OK?
Max
All OK. It’s been crazy at work. We just launched a new update to the app. Please let me know when I can help with the next step of your search for your sister. If I need to break the arms of some federal judges in order to gain access to Baby A’s sealed adoption records, I’m willing to do it.
Ivy
LOL!
Max
It’s cute that you think I’m joking.
Ivy
Aunt Sloane and I are going out to eat tonight but I’ll come by your house to say hi soon. Cool?
Max
Cool.
Ivy
I don’t want you to feel lonely.
Max
I’m never lonely.
Ivy
LOL!
Max
It’s cute that you think I’m joking.
Max set his phone down on the surface of his desk in his office at Libri. He’d lied a few times in that exchange with Ivy. He’d said he was okay. And he’d said he was never lonely.
He hunched forward onto his elbows, planting his fingers against his temples.
For the past week, he’d avoided Sloane. He’d hoped her absence would bring calm. Instead, he’d become increasingly rattled and panicky as the days had gone by. He was conflicted all the time—wanting her but telling himself wanting her wasn’t good for him. A portion of his mind remained dedicated to Sloane while the other portion of his mind dealt with meetings and email and decisions and the rest of his larger life.
He hated feeling this way.
He coexisted well with stress concerning his business. He confronted risk head-on. He thrived under pressure. He dealt with the responsibility of running Libri like he’d been born to it, which he had been. His ancestors on Felix’s side had been business moguls for centuries. The ability to take decisive, confident action was in his blood.
But this? What he’d been experiencing since kissing Sloane? It wasn’t about business. This made him feel a bunch of ways he didn’t want to feel. Vulnerable and unsure and miserable.
So far, he’d told no one about any of this. Secrecy came more naturally to him than transparency. At this point, though, he was willing to do just about anything to regain his footing. And since the coping mechanisms he’d been using weren’t working, he should change something. He should tell someone.
He picked up his phone.
Max
Any chance you’re free for lunch?
Jude
You in Bangor for work?
Bangor, where Jude lived, was over an hour away.
Max
No, but I’m willing to drive there.
Jude
In that case, I’ll clear my schedule.