Chapter 5
Chapter Five
S he leaned forward to peer at the recipe book and frowned. “When the recipe says to taste, what does that actually mean?”
Her mom appeared next to her, a furrow between her brows. “Oh, I hate when they write that down. It just means based on preference.”
Charlotte straightened her back. “Yes, but what if I don’t have a preference? What if I’m making something for the first time, and I need detailed, step-by-step instructions?”
Her mom smiled and patted her back. “Well, that’s where I come in. Now, come here. Let me show you how to crack an egg.”
In one quick move, Emily tapped it against the counter and opened up the shell with precision and finesse. The yolk came sliding out and fell into the bowl. Then, she gestured to Charlotte, took her hand, and helped her stir.
“You can’t add all the ingredients at once,” Emily said, her hand moving steadily with hers. “Otherwise, it affects the taste.”
“But it all gets baked together anyway. What difference does it make?”
“You’ll know when you taste it.” Emily released Charlotte’s arm and motioned for her to continue. “I need to find the sifter, so keep stirring.”
“Or you could just use a cup to measure out the flour,” Charlotte joked under her breath. When she saw the withering look on her mother’s face, Charlotte lowered her head and whisked faster.
It felt good to be working with her hands, to spend a weekend with her mom in the kitchen rather than being cooped up in the auditorium. Again.
Maybe Savannah was right, and she shouldn’t have volunteered to work through the summer.
Without the kids there, the school was too quiet and lifeless, and there was only so much preparation she could do without her actual class.
And she dreaded the idea of being in her apartment again.
With her roommates gone for the weekend to visit their boyfriends and leaving their cats in her care, Charlotte didn’t know what to do with herself. Addison was at the clinic with Mason all day, reviewing their options again, and things still hadn’t cooled off with Savannah.
Charlotte hated being on her own; she always had.
And now she hated it even more because she had no idea why she was walking around with this stirring in her stomach or why it made her sit up at night and pat the empty space next to her.
What’s the matter with you? Why are you so restless?
Even her usual morning walk hadn’t lifted her spirits. In the end, it was the thought of another morning spent at home, rifling through the channels, that had driven her out of the house. And once she’d spotted her mom’s car outside the bakery, she went inside without a second thought. Luckily, her mom seemed to be in a good mood and was more than willing to indulge her restlessness.
“So, you want to tell me what’s on your mind?” Emily stood and shoved her hair out of her face. “Don’t get me wrong. I love it when you stop by, and you’re always welcome to, but you only ever want to bake when you’ve got something on your mind.”
Charlotte dipped her finger into the batter and licked her finger. “That’s not true.”
Emily swatted her hand away. “You’re going to upset your stomach, and it is true. I did raise you, you know.”
Charlotte wiped her hands on the back of her apron. “I know.”
Emily added a few more ingredients and used a spatula to fold them in, making sure not to leave any streaks in the bowl. “Did you and Addison have a fight or something?”
Charlotte shook her head and leaned against the counter. “No, we’re fine. She and Mason are actually at the fertility clinic. Remember… she mentioned it at game night the other day?”
Emily’s face lit up. “Oh, right, yes. Poor dear. It’s so sad she can’t carry her own baby, but nowadays, there are so many options. I’m sure they can figure something out, and I think the idea of surrogacy is wonderful. Imagine being able to help a couple like that make their dreams come true.”
Charlotte pretended to examine her nails, her stomach twisting in on itself as her mind raced to make sense of Emily’s words. “I don’t know. It sounds messy.”
“I think as long as you’re all willing to work on it, that’s what matters,” Emily replied, pausing to swat her hair away. “Having a baby is a beautiful thing.”
Charlotte’s heart missed a beat. “Do you think I’d make a good mom?”
Emily glanced up sharply. “Oh, sweetheart, of course. I didn’t know it was on your mind.”
Charlotte pushed herself off the counter and clasped her hands behind her back, heart sputtering and then starting back up again. “All this baby talk got me thinking…that’s all.”
And she wasn’t sure she liked where her train of thought was going.
She didn’t even know how to be in a committed relationship.
So, why on earth was she thinking about carrying a baby for Addison and Mason, especially when she wasn’t even sure she wanted to be a mom herself?
Yup, it’s definitely time for you to join a gym or take up a new hobby. All this free time is getting to you, and it’s making you consider crazy things.
It was insane.
Wanting to help her friends didn’t make her qualified, not in the slightest, and the sooner she found a way to quell the restlessness that wouldn’t leave her alone, the better it was going to be for everyone involved.
With a slight shake of her head, Charlotte rejoined her mother at the counter, and the two of them worked in silence.
Her mom was about to say something else when the back door opened, and Savannah stumbled in, carrying a box, her sweater tied around her waist.
She glanced over at Charlotte and then back at her mom. “I don’t have any classes today, so I thought I’d come by and help.”
Emily patted down her apron. “Thank you, honey. Why don’t you take that box to the storage room? Char, you mind giving your sister a hand?”
Charlotte looked up from the bowl. “But what about the mixture?”
Emily waved her comment away. “I can take care of it until you get back. It’ll only be a few minutes anyway.”
Reluctantly, Charlotte handed her mother the whisk and stepped back. She wiped her hands on the back of her jeans and followed Savannah down the hallway. Outside the storage room, Charlotte leaned forward to twist the knob open, and the door creaked, letting out a damp and musty smell.
Charlotte waved a hand in front of her face and coughed. “When was the last time someone cleaned in here?”
Savannah brushed past her and glanced around the room. “Why? You going to lecture them about what they’re doing with their life too?”
Charlotte sighed. “Sav, you know I didn’t mean it like that.”
Savannah set the box down, and it kicked up some more dust. She coughed and took a step back. “You always say you never mean it.”
And she didn’t.
On the days when Charlotte’s mouth was one step ahead of her brain, she ended up regretting it. The last thing she wanted was to hurt her sister’s feelings and drive a wedge between them, especially during such a critical stage in Savannah’s life. In a few short months, her little sister was meant to go off into the world and forge a new path for herself.
Charlotte didn’t want to be left behind.
Ignoring the knots in her stomach, Charlotte took a step forward and placed a hand on Savannah’s arm. “I just think that med school is a really good choice for you. I’ll admit I had my reservations when you first told me, but now I can see it.”
Savannah had a big enough heart to be able to help people.
All she had to do was stand still long enough to see that.
Please, let me get through to her. Please, let me help her see that.
Savannah glanced from her hand to her face. “Are you just saying that to smooth things over, or do you actually believe that?”
Charlotte cleared her throat. “I do believe that. I can’t believe my little sister is going off to Harvard Med School in the fall. You’re going to be living in Boston, and you’re going to have a wonderful life there, and you’re going to forget all about us.”
Savannah snorted and shrugged her hand off. “You know that’s not going to happen.”
A lump rose in the back of Charlotte’s throat. “It better not, or I’ll hunt you down and drag you back here myself.”
Every time she tried to imagine Savannah all by herself in a dorm room, it filled her stomach with tight and anxious knots. Not only did she hate the thought she wasn’t going to be there to look out for her, but she also hated what it might do to their relationship.
Was being away going to make Savannah realize how small and limited her sister was?
Was it going to make her pity Charlotte for never making it out?
Savannah patted Charlotte’s hand. “You’re not going to get all weird on me, are you? Please don’t pull a Mom and start getting all emotional. Summer isn’t over, and I’m not gone yet.”
But you will be soon.
After giving her sister a small smile, the two of them stepped out into the hallway. In the kitchen, they found Jack standing next to their mom, the two of them whispering furiously. He flicked flour onto her nose, and she giggled and threw a handful at his blue shirt.
Jack took a step back and pointed a finger at her. “You’re playing dirty now.”
Emily threw her head back and laughed. “Don’t dish it if you can’t take it.”
Jack picked up the nearest bowl and narrowed his gaze. “Oh, you’ve done it now, Em.”
He was about to sprinkle some flour when he saw them. Immediately, Jack lowered the bowl and cleared his throat. “Hello, ladies. I didn’t see you there.”
“Hi, Jack.” Charlotte offered him a smile and a wave. “How are you? How’s work going?”
Jack set down the bowl and clapped his hands together. “Oh, you know how teaching is. Are you getting ready for the new school year?”
Charlotte nodded. “Yeah, I actually miss the kids when they’re away. It’s too quiet without them.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean. It’s hard to get used to warm coffee and uninterrupted bathroom breaks.”
Charlotte chuckled and glanced over at Savannah, who was staring at her hands. “Savannah and I were just talking about fall plans. You’re excited to go off to school, aren’t you, Sav?”
Without looking up, Savannah shrugged. “Yeah, I guess.”
Emily’s smile fell. “I can’t believe my baby is going off to college in the fall.”
Savannah glanced up and grimaced. “You’re not going to start crying again, are you?”
Emily dabbed at her eyes with her apron. “A mother is allowed to be emotional, okay?”
Charlotte and Savannah exchanged a quick look.
Emily sniffed again and straightened her back. “Speaking of emotional mothers, your aunt Lily’s son is in town.”
“Liam?” Charlotte’s brows furrowed together. “He’s been coming down a lot lately. Is everything okay?”
Emily paused to pour the batter into a loaf pan. “Yeah, Lily was telling me he’s looking around for the wedding and getting a feel for Falmouth. He’s also meant to be meeting with some clients.”
Savannah filled a cup with water and glanced over her shoulders. “Isn’t he a criminal lawyer?”
“It must have something to do with the McNealys.”
Three pairs of eyes turned to Jack, who was scrolling through his phone. He glanced up and did a double take when he realized they were all staring. “What? You guys haven’t heard of the McNealys? Rumor has it their family is involved in some kind of scandal, supposedly fraud and embezzlement.”
Emily gasped. “They’re one of the oldest families in Falmouth and one of the most respectable too.”
Charlotte blinked. “I guess you can’t know who people really are.”
The thought left a heavy and hollow ache in the center of her chest.
She thought she knew who she was and what she wanted out of life, but she was beginning to wonder if she’d just lied to herself.
Had she lured herself into complacency?
Had she really chosen the life she now had?