Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
Arbor
I momentarily lost my mind.
There’s no other explanation.
Morris puts me at ease in a way no one else ever has, and that’s what led to my momentary lapse in judgment. However, I just remembered my boobs leak every time I shower, I have stretch marks in places I didn’t know they could form, and I’m still bleeding occasionally.
The worst of the postpartum stuff has lessened, but it’s still something that pops up intermittently.
“The water is already running.” Morris steps back and tugs his T-shirt off with a hand at the back of his neck. My fingers seem to have a mind of their own as they migrate to his sides. He’s warm and soft—at least his stomach—and that gives me a weird comfort. My body is nowhere close to what it looked like a year ago. “I will be a gentleman and keep my eyes in respectable locations, but this is going to require removing all of our clothing.”
“Yeah,” I say, shivering when I realize how breathless I sound.
Morris’s massive hands slide up my waist, pulling my shirt off over my head. He tosses it into the hamper and spins me around, unhooking my bra.
My arm flies to push against the material as I use my other hand to snag the breast pads. There’s a little room where the toilet is housed, and I make a break for it. Tossing the pads in the trash, I pull down my bottoms and handle all that stuff too.
I’m surprised they have a trash can in the bathroom. When I moved in with Adam, he didn’t have any of the comforts women require.
Bundling my clothes up, I carry them out with me. The air is warm from the running shower, but I still have goose bumps.
My focus stays on my feet as I make my way to the hamper, tossing the bundle inside. By the time I turn around, Morris is inside the shower. It’s a fancy model with frosted glass and an actual door. While I was busy, Morris must have handled hanging up the towels because they’re now on the rack next to where you get in and out of the shower.
I make it to the doorway, and Morris greets me with a smile.
Never in my life have I had such trouble keeping my eyes on another person’s.
I still have peripheral vision, though.
My cheeks feel hot as I try to keep my face nonchalant.
Morris is massive, meaning I’m basically at eye level with his nipples. He has a decent smattering of blond hair across his chest and a small amount following a trail down his abdomen.
My eyes pop up when I spot the top of his pubic hair. His long blond hair falls well past his shoulders in waves, and that seems like a much more appropriate thing to focus on.
His hair might be longer than mine.
Morris snags my hand, pulling me to him. He moves me into the warm cascade of water and wraps his arm around my lower back. His hand spreads across my spine as his other cradles my head, and he dips me back farther into the spray.
It’s such an intimate moment that I almost don’t know what to do with myself. So, I relax and let him take the lead. I’ve been so overwhelmed recently that it’s a relief not to have to be in charge every minute of the day.
My stomach brushes his pelvis…and his half-hard cock.
He shrugs. “It’s a physical reaction to being this close to you. Not to mention your scent. Ignore it. I’m here to take care of you.”
My hands land on his arms as his fingers gently massage my skull. He thoroughly saturates my hair and pulls me up before snagging pumps of some type of fruity shampoo.
I probably should be stressing about the fact I look nothing like I did before getting pregnant, but Morris puts me at ease in a way no one ever has.
“Spin around for me,” he growls, quirking an eyebrow.
How does he manage to be both playful and commanding all at once?
My body snaps into motion, and my front ends up in the warm stream of water.
Morris’s chest bumps my back as he shampoos my hair. It’s relaxing, at least until my boobs ache like they always do when my milk lets down. My arm flies to cover them, but I know from experience they’re going to leak until I get them back in a nursing bra.
He pats my shoulder and says, “You know the deal. Turn for me, sweet girl.”
Sweet girl makes me melty every time the words slip from his lips.
I comply as my heart thunders, and he once again moves to cradle my lower back and skull. He tips me into the water, and his heavy shaft bumps my skin.
Not that I mind, but is that just a biological response?
Could it be genuine attraction?
That’s kinda hard to believe, considering how little effort I’ve put into my appearance lately.
I stare up into his bright blue orbs, and he shrugs.
“I’m trying here, but you’re beautiful, and I’m only human. It’s been a lot of years since I was this close to anyone.” He runs his fingers through my hair, helping the shampoo run clean. “I’m sorry I didn’t step in sooner to help more with Gracie. I wanted to respect your space, but I’ve been known to be a pushy fuck on occasion.” He pulls me up once more and helps me spin until my back is to his chest before moving on to the conditioner. “I worried I would come on too strongly, and you would find it overbearing.”
“It’s not your fault,” I say, my eyes squeezing shut. “I see how tired you are when you get home from work. I don’t want to be a burden.” A light smack lands on my hip and the side of my ass. I let out a squeak, but Morris’s hand moves to cradle my stomach. Once he’s sure I’m not going to slip, he goes back to conditioning my hair.
“You’re not a burden. Gracie isn’t an inconvenience. I count the minutes until I can clock out and come home. She’s getting so big.” He turns me to face him once more and repeats the process of rinsing my hair as he stares into my eyes. As soon as he’s done, he pulls me up and into his chest. I don’t know when I moved my arm, but it’s no longer blocking my tits, and they end up plastered to Morris’s stomach. There’s no chance to obsess about that because he goes on. “She’s growing so damn fast. I’m always afraid I’ll miss something while I’m gone. The highlight of every day is coming home to the two of you.”
My heart melts.
The sincerity written all over his face is easy to believe.
Gracie is pretty great.
If I were them, I’m not sure I could avoid getting attached. They’ve been with her just as long as I have. Well, for the time she’s been outside of my body.
“Tomorrow we should head to the cabin and clear out the rest of your stuff.” Morris moves to grab a pump of body wash. He proceeds to soap my back and all the way down to the top of my ass as I lean against his front. “The car Becky gave you is totaled. I have a buddy at a scrapyard. He’ll pay a few hundred dollars for it. We can mail her that with the house keys. It won’t be much, but it sounds like she gave it to you out of the goodness of her heart, and it’s better than nothing.”
“Yeah,” I say, grimacing. “I’ve talked to her twice, and I made sure she has my new number. I just haven’t had the heart to tell her I’m not staying there.”
A huge part of that is because I knew she would worry about me. Not that she already isn’t, but hearing I moved in with three random alphas? If the situation were reversed, I’d be panicking for her.
“It’ll give her a chance to cut off the utilities again,” Morris says calmly as his hands slide down my ass. His now fully hard shaft bumps around my stomach and hip, but he keeps his gaze on mine. Those huge, calloused fingers land on my hips, and he directs me into the shower spray to rinse my back.
I frown as I notice only the ends of his hair are wet.
“You haven’t had any time in the water. I’m a terrible shower partner.” I twist, slide by him, and grab his forearms to help move him into the spray. He’s so tall, the water slams into his shoulders and ricochets around his arms.
It is significantly cooler without the water to keep me warm, but I focus on collecting several pumps of body wash.
My hands land on his pecs, dancing over his tattoos. Though he’s not covered, like Hael and Hayes, both sides of his chest have a few. They just don’t continue down his sides and stomach like theirs do.
I focus on scrubbing him, even though there’s a good chance my tits are leaking. If I don’t see it, I can pretend it’s not happening.
Morris’s delicious coffee scent hits my nose despite the fragrant smell of the body wash.
Shouldn’t that help deaden his scent?
It should.
It just isn’t.
My thighs clench together as I continue to soap him up. My fingers glide down his sides and lower toward his pelvis.
He chuckles, grabbing my hands. “That’s about where I’m going to have to stop you.” He manages to turn us until we’re facing each other with his right side in the spray while my left side gets soaked. He twists, letting the water flow down his front.
No matter how hard I try, I can’t seem to keep my gaze in appropriate places.
My chest rises and falls rapidly as I get a full-on view of his erection.
Okay, so, Morris is proportional. His massive hands match his extreme height, which fits well with his impressive dick.
Holy shit.
I don’t think I’ve felt true arousal since Gracie was born, but my jaw falls as I realize…
I am deeply attracted to Morris.
It’s not just his looks.
It’s the way he makes me feel safe and cared for. The way I can relax knowing he’ll help me tackle any problem that may arise.
And the looks definitely don’t hurt.
He might not be classically handsome like the twins—his features are a little too wide for that—but Morris is the sneaky kind of sexy that comes out of nowhere.
Once you see it, you’ll never be able to miss it again.
He finishes rinsing and focuses back on me. “Did you want to do your front? Or should I handle that for you?”
I open my mouth to reply, and an embarrassing squeak escapes my lips instead of actual words. My face heats, and my nostrils flare, breathing in his pheromones.
Words don’t seem to be happening, so I raise a hand and point at his chest. The smile that crosses his face makes my insides warm and fuzzy.
I think Morris might be as attracted to me as I am to him.
God, I really hope he is.
Morris helps me finish cleaning up, but his hands never linger. The warm brush of his skin against mine leads to my system trying to convince me that I’m not still healing. It’s actually kind of a relief to experience sexual attraction again after so long, and it fills my chest with a giddy excitement.
Once we’re both clean, he helps me into my clothes but gives me privacy while I handle situating the pads that I know it’s too soon to go without. Afterward, he guides me to the pack bed and pulls back the thick gray comforter.
He nods and says, “Get comfy. I meant what I said. You’re off tonight.”
I scramble onto the mattress with my heart racing. There’s something about Morris going all bossy alpha that I like entirely too much. At the same time, I don’t think I need to worry. His bossy, commanding energy is always focused in ways that reassure my system. It’s nothing like the awful things Adam did to try to control me.
Then again, you don’t have the best track record with men .
I settle against the pillows and shake my head as a physical reaction to my thoughts.
No.
No fucking way am I going to allow Adam to destroy my ability to trust anyone else.
I had two great boyfriends in high school who were also alphas. They ended up going to colleges on opposite sides of the country, but they were decent guys. I also dated a really awesome beta during my first semester in college. I was pretty deep in grief over my dads, and Jimmy wasn’t equipped to deal with all that. He was a solid guy, just really young.
Morris has to have more than ten years in age on me. Possibly closer to twelve or fourteen. The twins might be a little closer to my age, though not by much.
Not that the age difference bothers me.
It feels like they might be at a stage where they’re ready to settle down. They certainly didn’t run off when I gave birth in their living room, and I’m pretty sure guys my own age would have freaked the hell out in the same situation.
Morris climbs onto the edge of the bed and rolls to face me. “It looks like you’re thinking about something pretty hard. Want to tell me about it?”
My head shakes, but I scoot closer to his expansive chest. “I’m not sure I’ve said it, but I want you to know how much I appreciate you looking after me. You make me feel safe in a way I don’t have words to explain.”
Morris moves closer, like he’s going to kiss my forehead, but I push up using my forearm and capture his mouth. His hand wraps around the back of my head, and he growls against my lips.
There’s not even any tongue, but it’s a perfect kiss.
I lick the seam of his lips and kinda throw my whole body at him. He pulls me over until I’m halfway on top of him, and he lets me guide the kiss. There’s something so tender about the way he cradles my skull and lower back, and it makes me want him even more.
He catches my lower lip between his teeth and nips at it as he releases it.
I’m a little heartbroken when he pulls back to breathe, but he nuzzles his beard to my cheek as his thumb teases the side of my neck.
“Rest now.” He bumps his cheek against mine. “More kisses tomorrow.” That low, ragged purr starts in his chest, and I can’t help but smile.
More kisses tomorrow sounds like heaven.