Chapter 7 #2
The coil of the tattoo machine buzzes in my hand and I relax under the familiar, almost hypnotic sound. My hand is steady while I follow the line of the rose, and I watch the way the ink sinks inside the skin, making the light blue line turn vivid black.
“How is it looking?”
“It looks great, so far.”
“It feels like thousands of angry bees are feasting on me,” he says with a nervous chuckle.
“That’s the charm. You’ll be back in this chair very soon for another round.”
I keep working in silence, making sure my hand is steady and the lines are perfect. I use my hand to stretch the skin when I need to, and clean the ink when necessary.
This is me, calm and collected, and never affected by anything.
The guy keeps asking questions, wanting to know why I chose this job and if I love it, and I reply with yes, or no, until I’m finally done.
His constant chatting has the power to distract me a little from what’s waiting upstairs, and from what’s waiting for me at my parents’ house.
What’s waiting upstairs is making my life even messier than it already was. I can’t ignore his gentle ways, his innocence—even with the job he does—his longing that calls so much to mine, and his touch that makes my skin sing. And makes other parts of my body stand to attention.
What’s waiting at my parents’ house scares the shit out of me. Years alone, no caring for anyone but my sister. All my relationships lasted only for the time it took to empty myself inside the other person and say goodbye. Always with a mutual agreement not to see each other again.
The only other person in my life was the owner of this shop. The only one who knew what they did to me, and stood silently by my side until I trusted him and opened up. He was taken away from me too quickly, leaving me to mourn another loss.
I’ve learnt that being alone is easier than loving and trusting. There is no love or trust left in me.
Caring for Arianna scares me. I’m not a father, and I’m not good at anything. Only this. Inking people is what I do well.
I failed at everything when I failed my parents expectations. Being torn away from my life, seeing my parents morph from loving people into monsters in the blink of an eye, losing my little sister… Those things destroyed me.
“How is it coming along?”
My client’s voice quiets those thoughts, making them fade away into the background and giving me back my balance. Something I hold onto with teeth and claws. I’m never going to let anyone be so important to me that they can tear my life into thousands of pieces.
“It looks wicked,” I reply, and keep my eyes and my mind on it.
Once I’m done, I use the mirror to show him the design, and I’m satisfied with how the tattoo turned out. I make quick work of cleaning the spot and wrapping it up, and then I move us to the till so I can give him the instructions and send him on his way.
I’m back on cleaning the chair and the instruments when the bell chimes and Kai, my neighbour, enters the shop. He took care of Jay last night, by checking his injuries, patching him up, and giving me the instructions on how to care for his concussion, when the only thing I could do was watch.
“Hey,” he says when he finds me next to the working chair.
“Hey,” I grunt in reply. I should be nicer to him after what he did for Jay, but his happy-go-lucky attitude pisses me off.
He takes up a lot of space with his big body, but what makes him look even bigger is the confidence he exudes in buckets. His sharp jaw and those dark eyes give his face a wild look, as if he were an untamable stallion. Only his curly hair gives him a softness that otherwise wouldn’t be there.
My body is gym made. Bulking up has made my life easier, and less people stand up to someone looking like me. Tattoos, muscles, and a mean streak.
I’m grateful for what he did yesterday. When I woke him up in the middle of the night, he didn’t ask questions.
He asked me to wait a second for him to get dressed, and not even five minutes later he was already examining Jay.
But that doesn’t mean he can waltz in here whenever he wants and pretend we’re friends.
I’m still jealous of the way he handled Jay yesterday, his touch soft and gentle despite those huge hands, while trying in every way not to hurt him. Only for this reason will I try to be nice.
“How is your friend?”
“He’s not my friend.” Be nice flies out the window.
“Sure thing,” he says, not caring about my lack of manners.
The smirk on his lips reminds me even more why I don’t like him. Nothing seems to faze him, he’s always calm, confident, and nice.
Everything I’m not. However, I know what gratitude is. “Thanks for what you did last night.”
“That’s what neighbours do.” He looks around, and it comes to mind that this is the first time he’s seeing this place.
I don’t make friends, and I don’t chat with neighbours. I mind my own business and I do my job.
We’ve only exchanged a few words outside the shop a couple of times, when I was cleaning the entrance and he was going to work. He does strange hours, so most of the time I don’t see him.
“Are you interested in getting a tattoo?”
“Nah. It wouldn’t look good on me. I’m here to check on my patient.”
“He’s resting, as I woke him up every couple of hours last night. Just like you told me to,” I say, while throwing the wipe in the bin. I lead him to the internal door that’ll take us upstairs.
When I open the door, I spot Jay still on the sofa, sitting up and watching TV. The smile on his lips tugs at the tangled strings in my heart, dislodging some, and awakens a need to live a simple life like this, having someone to come back to who’ll welcome me with a smile.
“Hey.” I go for cool and detached, but instead my voice comes out all croaky.
“Hey, man,” Kai says, entering the room behind me.
When Jay jumps out of his skin and his groan of pain fills the room, going to my head, I turn around to kill Ka with my gaze.
Kai walks towards him, and when he’s close enough, pat his head gently. “How are you feeling today?”
Jay freezes, and I growl, because Kai touching him drives me crazy, so I step in between them to shield him.
When they both look at me, one in surprise and the other smirking like a lunatic, I pretend I was coughing.
“This is Kai.”
“Hi. How are you feeling today?” he says gently, but Jay pulls back, and I move closer to him and turn around to look at him.
“He took a look at you last night. You needed a doctor as I didn’t know how bad it was. He’s my neighbour and I trust him not to ask questions.”
“Yep, I don’t ask questions,” he says, peeking from around my shoulder and smiling at Jay. “Unless they’re related to your health. In that case I want to know everything.”
Jay’s smile brightens the room, and I like it very much. What I don’t like is that Kai put it there.
“Can you let him examine you again? He needs to check if you’re okay.”
Jay looks between me and him, and then taking my hand, he nods. “I want you there,” he says, gripping my hand as if he doesn’t want to let go.
I tell myself, while we walk to Jay’s bedroom, that I’m not affected by it, but the crazy truth is that I don’t want to let go either.
While Kai examines Jay, I sit there next to him, his hand never leaving mine. Every time he hisses in pain, or whimpers because of the probing Kai is doing, I gently caress the back of his hand with my thumb. The touch seems to soothe him, and in some way it does the same to me.
“Did you call Jeremy?” I ask to distract Jay when Kai checks his ribs, and then I pass my thumb over his lips when he bites them so hard they go white.
“No,” he says, just before another groan of pain.
I keep caressing his lower lip, finding it soft and full, and the irrational thought of tasting them takes hold of me. Our eyes meet, and I can’t look away.
“I’m done,” Kai says, his voice too loud in the silent room, and it pulls me back from the deep lake I’ve fallen into.
I turn to him, his smirk at this point a perpetual item on his lips. I glare at him, hoping he’ll understand that he needs to keep his mouth shut.
“You’ll be good in a few days. The ribs don’t seem broken, but they will hurt. So you need rest, don’t lift weights, and eat properly.”
Kai ruffles Jay’s already untamed hair, and ignores the death glare I send his way. He laughs this time, a loud sound that fills the room, and pulls at Jay’s mouth. His smile enchants me, and I have to bite my lips to avoid smiling as well.
“How much do I owe you?”
“Nothing. My friends get my skills for free.” He stands and waves at Jay.
Friends…
I don’t even know what those are.