Chapter 14
Jay
Ispent the afternoon in my room trying to get in touch with Jeremy, without any success. Until finally just before bed he sent me a message saying he’s good, and that he just needs time.
In need of hearing his voice before I fall asleep, I blast his phone with calls, but calling doesn’t convince him to answer.
Leaving him a few days to cool down is the only option, but I’m close to chasing him down so we can talk without interruptions.
A loud scream pierces the night and brings me comfort. Arianna’s awake and Haden is probably panicking to get everything ready so she doesn’t wake the whole neighbourhood.
I’ve taken up the habit of coming out of my room and staying in the kitchen every time Arianna wakes up.
Their room is so close to mine that I hear her as soon as she’s awake…
and even if it wasn’t, her loud screaming would wake me up.
To be honest, my fears and memories keep me awake more than she does.
I usually wait until Haden has prepared her bottle to leave my room, and I eavesdrop on them just to make sure Haden doesn’t need me to help.
The darkness is full of his soft clean swearing when he’s having trouble doing something, and his sighs of relief when he finally manages to sort them out. Usually it’s picking her up that makes him sweat, and makes me chuckle.
I like the way he talks to her, until I hear the sound of Arianna sucking on the bottle.
Haden learns quickly. Even if I think he’s doing a great job, like every dad, he wants to be perfect.
Arianna really is a princess, and she has both of us wrapped around her little fingers. Sometimes she’s fussy with Haden and she prefers resting in my arms. While I’m sorry for Haden, I’m happy she wants me close. I’m glad that with them, I’m judged for what I give and not for my past.
Tonight there’s a full moon, and the kitchen is cast in a soft light that makes everything feel like a dream.
Haden walks in, rubbing his eyes. He looks exhausted and those dark circles talk of sleepless nights, but that’s what having a baby does to you.
I’d jump in if he asked, but he loves tending to her. They’re bonding so beautifully.
“Hey,” I say, from my spot against the sink, to make sure he knows I’m here. I don’t want Haden getting scared at finding me here in the dark.
Every loud sound could lead to Arianna waking up, and to hours of rocking her to sleep.
I don’t usually wait until he’s done, because I don’t want him thinking I don’t trust him. But today, lost in my thoughts of them, I’ve lost track of time.
“What are you doing here?” His voice is rough, but I don’t take it personally. I’m sure it’s because he’s exhausted.
Haden’s so close that his breath caresses my skin as if it were his hands, and goosebumps rise in reply to the phantom touch.
He scratches his chest, and in doing so he grazes my shoulder, burning my skin with his touch.
I can’t shift my gaze away from him, or from the expanse of his chest, or from those tattoos playing hide and seek in the poorly lit room. I want to walk those few steps and turn the lights on to admire his body in all its glory, but that would mean losing the closeness we have now.
When hair tickles my hand resting against my leg, it hits me that he’s only wearing boxers.
My brain goes up in flames… lust and desire filling me up like a glass of water under an open tap.
He’s the one who turns on the light, and it takes me a few seconds to become accustomed to it, but when I do, I nearly swallow my tongue.
Haden’s gorgeous, with broad shoulders and a slimmer waist, and those boxers embracing his strong legs, outlining his cock, and making my mouth water with the need to taste him. His muscles are well defined, and his chest is hairy and tempting.
Unconsciously, when he’s once again closer to me, I lean in until my mouth touches his skin, and my lips tingle at the contact.
“Hey.” His voice now full of desire, and that spurs my own. His hand comes under my chin, and two fingers rest there.
In trepidation, I wait for him to push my head back so that our eyes meet, but instead, a kiss lands on my forehead. It doesn’t do anything to extinguish the need I have for him.
A warmth I’ve never felt before spreads inside me, so intense and so different from the craving I felt just a moment ago. This warmth talks of care, desire, and protection, all things I haven’t had in a while. It tastes like home.
Haden tastes like safety, passion, and heaven, all in one beautiful grumpy man.
I want more of this, more of him… and in a moment of blind selfishness I take it. I rise onto my tiptoes, inviting Haden to take my lips in a demanding kiss.
His arms go around my waist and I thread my fingers in his beard to pull him down towards me.
He crashes me against his chest, and all my nerves tingle in joy.
I want to rip my T-shirt off, so I can enjoy the touch of his skin on mine and finally understand how soft or coarse the hair on his chest is.
But then his other hand wraps around my hair and pulls my head backwards, and that display of strength has my cock filling up. Haden leans in and licks the cords of my neck, and I whimper in need.
I wrap my arms around him, anchoring myself for the storm his touch will cause inside me, and for how wrecked I’ll be, in the best possible ways, once he has his way with me.
His mouth takes mine, his beard gently scratching my lips and skin, and heightening the emotions filling me to the brim. His touch is like fireworks on a New Year’s night in London. Loud, breathtaking, and all-consuming…
That’s what Haden’s kisses do to me.
This time, he doesn’t ask permission to dive in. Instead, his tongue pierces my lips as if he can’t wait to taste me again.
I moan as if I’m made of lust.
He explores my mouth, his touch burning every part it grazes until we’re both panting. It’s not enough.
I want more, so I use my tongue to chase his, demanding more and more. Nothing has ever felt so good, so right.
His hands begin their own exploration, moving from around my waist to my side, then moving back and forward to find a way under my T-shirt.
By the time he finds his way in, I’m ready to pull my top off.
I make him pay for teasing me, in my own way, when I let my hands slide down his neck, shoulders, chest… caressing every dent his muscles create. Just brief touches to tease and excite… until they’re resting on his waist.
I slide my hand across his middle, letting my fingers play with his oblique muscles, and the trails of hair that if followed will bring me to a very hard part of him.
Instead, I go up and up, until I finally know how soft the hair on his chest is…
velvety, exciting, and a reminder of the closeness we share.
I don’t waste any time playing with it… threading my fingers through it, pulling it a bit to incite a groan from Haden.
I enjoy the warm skin below, until he’s softly growling in pleasure and pressing me against him even closer.
Haden’s hands let go of my shirt, and in a quick movement are under my arse. Then in the next second, my feet are no longer on the floor and my body is flying upwards.
Instinctively, I wrap my legs around Haden’s hips, and with that movement our cocks nestle against each other. I moan and shiver when Haden’s breath washes over me.
I circle my arms around his neck, loving how close our faces are. I lick my lips, and Haden, as quick as a hawk, takes my mouth, and with it my breath.
Our tongues duel for dominance, a give-and-take game that I love very much, and I don’t want to win. I love when Haden takes charge and stirs feelings long forgotten. When I can’t remember how to get air inside my lungs, Haden pulls away.
His ragged and hot breath caresses my skin, and makes me want more and more. Makes me want to be the recipient of everything he can give.
“You feel and taste so damn good, my boy.”
That three letter word coming from him nearly makes me come. I’ve never been anyone’s boy, but damn if I don’t want to be his everything.
I hated it when those men at the bar patted my head calling me a good boy. I’d have vomited the instant those words fell on my ears.
But Haden calling me “my boy” makes me feel special, like he wants to protect me, like he wants me for himself.
He takes my mouth in another insatiable kiss, and only when my arse lands on a hard surface does my brain register we’ve moved.
The counter is cold underneath me, but the heat coming from Haden makes me forget about it. Especially when he takes my mouth in another scorching kiss that has the power to make me forget my own name, my own existence before him.
By the time we separate I’m breathing as if I just ran a hundred metres in three seconds, but my body has never been more aroused.
I let out a sound of displeasure when Haden pulls away, but it dies pretty soon when his hand lands on my arse and he pulls me to the edge of the counter.
Our cocks brush against each other, and ignite a need to be naked right this second. The thought flies away when he pulls me a little closer still, and murmurs something against my lips.
“You’re not going anywhere until I’ve had my fill of you.”
“Staying sounds perfect.” So much truth behind those simple words. I want to stay, I want a shot at happiness. This happiness between us. My brain shuts down when those words earn me another all-consuming kiss.
His hand reaches for the hem of my T-shirt again, and with measured movements he pulls it up and over my head. He stops for a second, making me think that he’ll leave it there to limit my movements.
The sound of displeasure at not being able to touch him dies on my lips because Haden slides the T-shirt down my arms until it’s free, and then discards it on the floor, more interested in what getting rid of it has uncovered.