CHAPTER TWO
Cole
I woke up feeling completely drained. So exhausted I could barely move. My mind was carrying too heavy a weight to bear. The stress of keeping everything together, of pretending everything was fine, was exhausting. I lay there, staring at the ceiling, replaying every decision that led me here, every mistake that had turned my life into this tangled mess. How could I have been so fucking stupid?
I kept asking myself why I cheated on my wife when I loved her so deeply. Why had I allowed myself to be swayed by someone new—someone who, in truth, meant nothing to me beyond physical attraction? I wasn't unsatisfied with Sara. I was very satisfied. She was everything I could have wanted in a partner. There was no logical reason for me to betray her, no justification for letting myself fall into this trap.
Yet, I had. And all for what? Because it was something new? Something different? A fleeting return to a version of myself I thought I'd left behind, the carefree bachelor who moved from one woman to the next without a second thought. But I wasn't that person anymore, and pretending otherwise had only made everything worse.
Now, I was stuck, tethered to a mistake that had spiraled into a life-altering reality. I hated myself for it. For risking everything I had with Sara for something so empty, so meaningless. The guilt was eating away at me. And worse, the realization that I had destroyed the stability I once took for granted, all for a momentary thrill, kept haunting me. Now, I had to live with the consequences.
For months, I had been juggling this secret life. I'd go to Elsa, then come back to my wife, pretending everything was normal. I'd lie to her, keeping up the appearance that nothing had changed. It was draining. The mental effort of keeping the two parts of my life separate—of pretending—was wearing me thin.
When I started with Elsa, I had been married to Sara for three years. It began as something brief. An intense fling that lasted a month before Elsa found out she was pregnant. That changed everything. It stopped being just an affair. It was a whole other level of mess I never expected. And now, eight months later, I still didn't know how to fix it. Or if it was even fixable.
How was I supposed to balance everything? How would I handle the pressure? I wasn't ready for what came next, and honestly, I wasn't sure I ever would be. The idea of dealing with both families and keeping up the lies felt like something I couldn't keep up with much longer.
Elsa was about to give birth soon, and I still couldn't see a way to manage this life once our daughter arrived. A baby would make the already complicated situation even more real and harder to hide.
I had no answers. No clear path forward. The mess I'd created felt impossible to navigate, and the guilt only grew heavier with time.
And the scariest part? The more I feared losing Sara, the more deeply I fell in love with her.
"Hey, you're awake," Sara said as she burst into our bedroom, wearing a Japanese silk kimono that clung perfectly to her figure. She had tied her brown hair into a messy bun atop her head, exposing her slender neck—a sight that never failed to make my mouth water.
I gave her a small smile, though it carried both love and guilt. She moved around the room, searching for something, like she did every morning. Losing things had always been part of her routine.
Watching her, looking manic yet effortlessly beautiful, made my chest tighten.
"What are you looking for?" I asked.
"My glasses."
"It's on top of your head, babe," I chuckled. Sara was only thirty-one, but she was as forgetful as an eighty-year-old.
She froze. "Oh." Her hand shot up to her head, finding her glasses. Then, she placed them on the edge of the nightstand, leaving me wondering why she had been looking for them in the first place.
"I just made breakfast," she said. "And now I'm going to shower."
I reached out, extending my hand toward her. "Come here first. I want a hug."
She halted, scrunched her nose, pretended to think for a moment, then shook her head. "No, I'm already late."
"Two minutes. Just a quick hug," I insisted.
Instead of answering, she sprinted toward the bathroom. But just as she disappeared from view, her voice rang out from behind the door. "But you can join me!"
Of course, I'd join her. I didn't need to be told twice. I sprang out of bed without hesitation, a grin spreading across my face.
When I entered the bathroom, Sara was already in the shower, the water cascading down her bare skin. The grin on my face widened as I quickly shed my boxers and stepped under the stream of water with her.
"You know," I said, leaning in to press my lips on her shoulder, my body aligning with hers, "inviting me in here is just going to make you even more late."
"Shower only, Cole," she said, squeezing a generous amount of soap into her palm before lathering it meticulously over my chest. Sara worked with precision. She was obsessed with perfection.
I was instantly hard.
"I can finish you in ten minutes flat," I offered.
Sara grinned. Then she shook her head. "Nice try." She spun me around and soaped my back.
After she thoroughly lathered and rubbed me clean, she turned me to face her and pressed the bottle into my hand. I glanced at it, then back at her, frowning. "You really expect me to soap you up when I'm already this hard?"
Sara laughed. "Yes."
"You're cruel, babe."
She lifted both arms, the movement making her breasts bounce slightly. I cursed under my breath but complied anyway. I never turned down a chance to touch her. By the time I had her upper body covered in scented bubbles, the ache was killing me.
"Honey, please..." I begged shamelessly.
She snatched the soap bottle from my hand and crouched down, her fingers gliding over me as her eyes lingered on my hardened shaft. For a moment, a flash of Elsa from last night crossed my mind.
I clenched my jaw and shook my head, forcing the thought away.
Sara looked up at me. "Okay," she said.
My eyes went wide. "Okay?" I almost squealed with excitement.
"Yes," she smiled.
I instantly pulled her up and slipped my arms around her waist, pulling her close. She tilted her chin up, rising onto her toes, and kissed me softly. Her breath mingled with mine as she exhaled into my mouth, her lips deepening the kiss as she pulled me in. I cupped her core and rubbed languidly, already feeling the slick warmth coating my fingers.
I loved her. I loved her so fucking much. What if she left me? What would I be? I couldn't imagine it. A low, rumbling sound escaped from my chest as I pulled back slightly, my voice husky. "Are you mine, Sara?"
She shivered, her breath catching as she seemed unable to form a single sentence. The feeling of my hand on her entirely consumed her focus.
"You know I am," she moaned.
"Say it," I whispered, my voice strained, needing to hear it.
In that moment, insecurity washed over me, driven by the guilt that ate at me. Guilt over what I had done, over my betrayal. Every day, I feared Sara would find out and leave me.
"Ah, Cole..."
One finger slipped in. "Say it."
"I'm yours," she moaned louder.
Two fingers in, slowly swirling inside.
"Again."
"Fuck, Cole! Just get on with it already," she snapped.
I chuckled as I pulled out my fingers and turned her around so fast, pressing her to the wall with her back against me. Warm water from the shower above us drenched us both, but it was only her I felt. Her skin, her breath, everything.
I slammed into her with one powerful thrust. Then I began pounding in and out of her, tightening my arms around her. Our breaths intertwined as I gently tilted her head, lifting her chin to meet my mouth.
It wasn't long before I felt the shiver that overtook her body, the tightness of her core, followed by the explosion that made her knees buckle. The climax hit her hard, and I had to catch her before she collapsed to the floor.
But I wasn't done. I angled her hips up, then I moved fast, again and again. And when I finally climaxed, a low growl rumbled from deep within me as I held her tightly, my body shuddering violently.
We were still catching our breaths when she turned around, palmed my face, and looked at me—really looked at me. Her gaze was soft, and my heart softened along with it. I lived for this moment when she looked at me like I was her everything.
"Cole..."
I swallowed.
"I love you," she said.
Oh, goddamn it, Sara.
Emotions overwhelmed me in an instant, threatening to bring me to tears. The urge to confess everything surged through me. I wanted to tell her. I wanted to be worthy of the way she looked at me.
But if I told her, I'd lose her.
So, all I could do was pull her into my arms and whisper, "I love you so fucking much, Sara. You're everything to me. I'll never leave you, even if you ask me to. Do you trust me?"
She nodded. Her body went slack against mine, a soft sigh slipping past her lips. I hoped to hell she felt the truth in my words. I pressed a firm kiss to her forehead and tightened my grip, staking my claim.
She was mine. She fucking belonged with me.
And I would never let go.
*** *** ***
I pulled into the reserved parking spot with my name on it and stole a quick glance at Sara, smiling warmly at her.
"Hope you have a great day," I said, smiling.
She smiled back at me, and I felt my love for her overwhelm me again. My wife was stunning. Her shoulder-length brown hair framed her beautiful face perfectly, emphasizing her elegant features and the graceful curve of her neck, which I adored.
Sara always kept her makeup minimal, but she needed little. Her skin was flawless, her lips naturally pink, and her thick lashes made her blue eyes look effortlessly captivating.
"You too, babe," she replied and gave me a wink.
We both got out of the car and made our way to the building entrance, heading toward the elevator. We used separate elevators since they were grouped by floor, diverging our paths—I to the twentieth floor and Sara to the fifteenth.
As the door opened on my floor, I made my way toward my office, noticing Elsa was already waiting there. She stood by the door, a soft smile on her face as she looked up at me.
"Morning," she greeted, her tone cheerful, as if she hadn't tried—and failed—to suck me off the night before.
"Elsa," I responded, nodding slightly, narrowing my eyes in suspicion as I met her gaze.
She was on Sara's team.
I wondered what she was doing here.