CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Sara
Life had been both great and a whirlwind for me. Exciting yet overwhelming, full of newfound independence but also uncertainty.
A lot had changed since the divorce.
One of the biggest changes was moving my company out of our previous building. The rent had been outrageous, something I could no longer justify or afford. Now, we had moved to a large, open-concept space on the outskirts of the city. It was practical, efficient, and exactly what we needed.
The only downside? My drive took much longer, and I no longer had a private office. The entire space was open except for the wall and door that separated the office from the reception area. While it fostered collaboration and made communication seamless, there were moments when I missed the solitude—missed having a door to close when I needed a moment to think, to breathe, to be alone with my thoughts.
With work, I was finally getting a handle on things. I was getting better at managing the company's finances and learning to be more strategic with the projects we took on.
There were limitations to being a small, independent company, and now, without the safety net we once had, every decision mattered. I had to be careful, ensuring that each project was worth the effort and resources we put into it.
There was no backup anymore. No cushion to fall on.
But despite the challenges, I felt a sense of accomplishment. This was mine. Something I built and sustained on my own.
In the beginning, Cole had supported me, even if he never admitted it outright. The steady stream of clients in those early days was proof of that. And the additional capital he contributed—beyond what we had originally agreed upon—had been a tremendous help. He labeled it a loan, likely because he knew I wouldn't accept it otherwise, but deep down, I knew that even if I never repaid it, he wouldn't press me. Still, I was determined to pay it back, even if it would take a long time to settle the full amount.
He had quietly ensured I had a strong foundation until I could stand on my own, build my reputation, and prove that I was the best at what I did.
Now, I was standing firmly on my own, and he had knowingly taken a step back.
Yet, he never completely gave up on trying to win me back. I knew that. His dedication and his quiet persistence made me lower my walls just a little. We had dinner together three times in the past few months, and I allowed him to visit me at work. Yet, despite all that, I still couldn't let him all the way in.
I remembered our last dinner.
It was a quiet evening, just the two of us sitting across from each other in a dimly lit restaurant. He had chosen the place carefully, somewhere intimate but not overwhelming, somewhere that didn't hold memories of what we used to be.
I remembered how he watched me. His eyes searched mine as if trying to find a trace of the love I once had for him.
"I miss you so much," he had said, his voice low and raw. "I never stopped loving you."
There was emotion in his words. Deep, undeniable emotions. And also regret, longing, a promise that he would do better.
But as I sat there, hearing him say it, I wondered... did I miss him too?
I asked myself if I was still angry at him. The betrayal still lingered. I couldn't erase it, nor could I forget how deeply it had cut me. But the anger, the bitterness that once consumed me, had faded. They no longer burned inside me like they used to.
Should I give him another chance?
Was my love for him still as strong as it once was? Or was I merely holding on to the remnants of what we used to be?
At the end of that dinner, he drove me home.
We stood in front of what used to be our house. A place filled with memories, both beautiful and painful. And then he leaned in, brushing his lips against mine. I let him, just for a moment, trying to gauge what I felt, searching for the emotions that once came so easily.
But I didn't kiss him back. I couldn't.
Instead, I stepped away.
That night, I lay in bed, gazing at the ceiling—something that had become a habit lately—my mind consumed by countless thoughts.
Diving into work was the simplest way to escape the weight of the big decisions waiting for me. It kept my mind occupied, allowing me to sidestep the uncertainty and emotions I wasn't ready to confront. As long as I stayed busy—immersed in deadlines and responsibilities—I could delay facing the question of what came next and what I truly wanted in my life.
I considered the idea of being alone. At least for now. And maybe that was okay. I had Emma in my life, and she filled my days with joy, her presence a reminder that I wasn't truly alone. Julian had also become a significant part of my days. He brought a kind of lightness I hadn't realized I needed. With them, I smiled, I laughed. For the first time in a long while, I felt content with my life.
Lately, I had also been spending more time with Maria. We went to yoga more often and worked out together, and somehow, she had influenced me into embracing a more active, healthier lifestyle. Now, I had never felt better.
In the end, you don't need an army of people around you. Just a few who truly matter. The ones who would be there, no matter what.
Cole's parents had finally returned from overseas.
I had spoken to them over the phone a few times, breaking the news of our divorce because I was certain Cole wouldn't bother to do it himself. When they reached out and invited me to lunch one Sunday, I accepted, thinking it would be a simple, cordial meeting.
The food hadn't even arrived yet when Cole's mother, Ivonne, spoke, her tone heavy with expectation.
"Cole told us everything, Sara. All the despicable things he had done. He came clean. And that's a start, isn't it?" she said, her voice softer now, almost pleading. "He regrets it. Truly. And he still loves you."
When I didn't respond, she added, "Can you consider forgiving him, Sara? You were the best thing that ever happened to him. Look at him now—he's lost so much weight, those dark circles under his eyes... all of this has destroyed him."
It was strange, hearing her speak with such concern about her son. Almost as if she had always been a present, caring mother.
Cole had never been close to his parents. His nanny raised him while his parents traveled the world for business, always too busy and preoccupied. He had no warm childhood memories of them, only expensive gifts sent from distant places and the occasional, detached conversations.
And I wondered if that was why he had clung so tightly to Elena.
"Have you talked to Cole about this?" I asked her, keeping my voice even. "We both agreed to the divorce, and it was a peaceful separation. Neither of us objected."
"You know how Cole is," Ivonne sighed. "It's always been difficult to have a proper conversation with him."
Cole's father, Edwin, said, "It's not unusual for married couples to stray now and then, but what truly matters is finding their way back to each other. Especially for a man. Temptation is always there, and sometimes mistakes happen. But in the end, a strong marriage is about pushing through those moments and choosing to stay together. That's what Ivonne and I did, and here we are, nearly forty years later, still standing. Ivonne was the same—threatening divorce, running off—but she always came back to me."
It was almost amusing—almost. I watched as Ivonne's lips pressed into a thin line, her arms crossing tightly over her chest. Clearly, she didn't appreciate being spoken for, nor did she seem pleased with Edwin's version of their marriage.
I just nodded and forced a smile as I ate my meal. After the lunch ended, I gave them both a hug and promised to keep in contact.
That was it.
I had come out of respect, but that was all.
The next morning, Cole called me, sounding tense and unsettled. "My parents reached out to you," he said, his voice edged with urgency. "I'm sorry if they said anything that upset you."
"It's fine," I told him. "But I think you should honestly talk to your parents and clarify that we're truly divorced."
That was a month ago, and I hadn't seen him since. He had been utterly disappointed when I didn't respond to his attempt to kiss me. Maybe, at that moment, he realized he was moving too fast. Or maybe he had simply been too busy. From what I'd heard, he was in the middle of a major takeover. It wasn't surprising. Cole had always taken on more than he should.
"Hey, Sara," Dona's voice broke through my thoughts. I looked up to find her standing beside me, her eyes filled with curiosity, likely wondering why I was sitting there, lost in my own world.
"Cole's here," she said. "He's waiting outside."
"I'll go see him," I told Dona. "Just let him know I'll be out in five minutes. Thank you."
"Okay," she said with a nod before turning around and heading to the front.
I quickly finished replying to my last email, then sat back, staring at my laptop, lost in thought.
I knew why Cole had come. He never said it outright, but the message was clear—he wanted me to remember his presence. To know that he was still waiting.
Closing my laptop, I got up and walked to the reception area.
Cole was sitting there, just like before, holding a single red rose and a pink one in his hand. When he saw me, he stood up, offering a small, hesitant smile.
"Sara."
I nodded and sat down beside him. The room was empty, with no one around managing the reception area. If someone arrived, they'd ring the bell, but for now, it was just the two of us. The silence felt heavy, but neither of us said anything at first.
For a moment, I just looked at him—the man I had once loved with all my heart. Even now, he still had an effect on me. That familiar pinch in my chest, a mix of warmth and pain, reminding me of everything we had been.
He was the love I had gained and lost. The memories that refused to fade, the good and the bad.
Cole was right here beside me, and soon, I would head to a party where there was a chance of seeing Archie again after all these months. The thought of it consumed me, my mind drifting to him constantly throughout the day.
I realized this was the moment I had to be certain about what I wanted in my life.
Would Cole remain in my past, or after everything that had happened, could he still be part of my future?
Or was it Archie, the man who had loved me unconditionally, the one I had refused and let go of so callously? From what I knew, he had moved on, continuing his life as if I had never been a part of it. And maybe... he was better off without me.
A million thoughts battled inside my head as I tried to make sense of what my heart was telling me.
What did I truly want?
"Have you been well?" I heard him ask.
My thoughts scattered as I blinked back to the present. "I'm good, thank you," I replied.
"I'm sorry for dropping by unannounced. I have a project nearby, so I thought I'd come visit."
"It's fine," I said, though my voice felt distant. My mind still tangled in too many thoughts.
"I wonder if you'd like to have dinner with me?" he asked carefully, but it was laced with hope. "There's this new restaurant that's been getting great reviews, and I thought maybe we could try it together."
While he was talking, my mind cleared up suddenly.
All this time, the question lingering in my mind had been whether I could build a life with Cole after everything he had done. Could I still trust him? Could I learn to trust him again?
I had been so sure that forgiveness was impossible. His betrayal had cut too deep, leaving wounds I wasn't sure would ever fully heal.
That was what kept me holding back, never letting him in again.
But the real question I should have been asking myself was—did I still love him?
And the answer was, I did. I still loved him.
But not the way I once did. Not as deeply, not as fiercely.
I wasn't sure if it was his betrayal that had dulled that love... or if it was because someone else had already taken his place in my heart.
In an instant, it all came rushing back—the moment Archie stepped into my life, the way he quietly became my anchor. He had been there when I was at my lowest, offering me strength when I had none left to give.
Since the night we went to that club, I had sensed that my feelings for him ran deeper than friendship. I knew my heart was drawn to him, but I was too afraid to admit it. The pain I carried still consumed me, leaving me unsure of myself, uncertain of what I truly felt.
But the feelings had always been there, lingering beneath the surface.
And now, with startling clarity, I finally understood. I had fallen in love with him.
With Archie.
Oh, my God, I love him.
Archie was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.
I didn't choose Archie because he was a better man than Cole. And I didn't let go of Cole solely because of his betrayal.
It wasn't about that anymore.
For so long, I held on to the memory of the love I once had for Cole, convincing myself that it still meant something, that it still held weight. But now, as I sat here, I finally understood, what I had been holding on to was just a memory.
I chose Archie because, over time, I truly fell in love with him.
He was the calm after the storm, the steady presence that quieted my heart and mind with just a word, a touch, a single glance. And as I searched my memories, trying to recall if I had ever felt that way with Cole. I couldn't.
Archie was my home. He was love. He was now my one.
And I let him go.
I let Archie go.
"What are you thinking, Sara?" Cole's voice seeped into my thoughts, pulling me back to the present. I glanced at him, realizing, with a strange sense of peace, that he was now my past. There were wonderful memories of him, just as there were painful ones, and they would always be a part of me.
But I was ready to embrace the future.
"Cole," I said softly, looking at him with a mix of sadness and resolve. "I think it's time we let go."
His face drained of color instantly as he stared at me, the realization hitting him in an instant. Even though my words seemed to come out of nowhere, he understood exactly what I meant. His mouth parted slightly, but no words followed.
I offered him a soft, bittersweet smile. "I'm telling you this because I don't want you to keep holding on to a hope that no longer exists. You and I... we're each other's past. It's time we both moved on with our lives. I'm sorry. I know you've tried so hard to prove yourself. And I see that you never give up. But..." I hesitated, searching for the right words, for a way to soften the blow. "Some things just can't be undone. Some things change us forever."
"Sara," he swallowed hard, his voice thick with emotion. "Please. I love you. I can't..." He shook his head, struggling to find the right words, his breath shallow. "I can't lose you. Not like this. I've made so many mistakes, I know that. But I'm still here, still fighting for us." His voice trembled as he moved closer, eyes desperate. "Please, don't walk away. I'll do whatever it takes to make things right."
I gently took his hand, squeezing it softly, the reality of the situation settling in. It's really over for us. "You've changed, and I've changed too. We're not the same people anymore, Cole. We've both grown, and we've become better in our own ways, but we're heading in different directions now. And as much as I care about you, I can't pretend that we can go back to what we had."
He took a deep, shaky breath, pulling his hand from mine and burying his face in his hands. His elbows rested on his knees as my words seemed to settle in.
When he lowered his hands, his eyes were red-rimmed, filled with unshed tears. "I'm sorry, Sara. I'm so sorry for ruining what we had. But I understand what you're saying—that we're not the same people anymore." He gave me a faint, sorrowful smile. "We've changed a lot, haven't we?"
I nodded, fully certain of my decision. Even if Archie and I somehow couldn't be together, I knew this was the right choice. Cole and I had changed too much, and we were no longer the same people we once were.
"There's a reason why we've changed, Cole. You might not see it now, but getting back together is not the best decision for both of us."
He gave a bitter chuckle, shaking his head. "Honestly, I still can't imagine letting go of you, Sara."
I smiled softly. "You'll find happiness someday, Cole. Just hold on to the man you are now, and don't let yourself slip back. You'll be fine."
He leaned back in his seat, slouching slightly, and I did the same. We sat in silence for a while before he finally spoke.
"Archie..." His voice was a whisper. "He has your heart, doesn't he?"
I glanced at him, uncertain of how to respond. But before I could find the right words, he continued. "I could see it. The way your eyes lit up when his name came up. Even when you jumped at that article online with his name on it. And how worried you were when he went missing." He looked at me, his eyes gentle. "I could see it even before you realized it. But I thought, since you and he weren't together, I still had a chance."
"Cole..."
"I also noticed how hard it was for you to let me back into your life, Sara," he continued. "I could feel the distance, the hesitation, even though you were still kind and polite. I knew you wanted to see if you still had the same feelings for me. But you couldn't, could you?"
Cole let out a long sigh before taking my hand and standing, pulling me up with him. He enveloped me in a tight hug that almost stole my breath. As he held me, his voice was full of emotion. "I'll always love you, Sara. But I want the best for you. I just regret that it won't be me. Be happy, Sara."
Then he walked out, his head hanging low, hands shoved deep in his pants pockets. He left the roses on the table in front of me, a last gesture of what once was.