48. Jude
Tennant pulls Benjamin from the room, leaving me, Keegan, and Jayden with our Boys, who are all looking guilty and sad. I raise a brow at my Bel Fiore, not liking the way he curls into himself and tilts his head down. Though he makes sure to keep his eyes on me, as he’s been taught.
“I think you need to tell us what happened,” Keegan says, almost gently, though I can feel the tension radiating off him, as it matches my own.
All three Boys cringe, but it’s Marcus who speaks up.
“We were trying to get answers from…Sandro. We’re concerned.
His name change, his therapy, and now his relationship with Tennant…
We had to make sure he was alright. He may no longer be our Master, but he’ll always be Il Padrone to us.
So, we had to make sure he was okay.” There’s a defiant edge to his words, as if he's defending something that should be as simple as it sounds—checking on their former Master and friend.
But… “Tennant and Hollis are both ready to take you all to task. Hol sent out a pre-warning to us all, which is how we got here so quickly when Ten sent his message. So. What. Happened?” I make sure to meet all their eyes, and they all have the decency to look ashamed, but that only ramps up the concern more.
“I don’t agree with calling him Sandro.” Antonio finally speaks up. “It’s bullshit. That’s not him. He’s Allesandro. Il Padrone. Not…whoever he’s trying to pretend to be.”
I raise an eyebrow at that. “You think he’s lying? That he’s not taking his therapy seriously? You think he’d willingly risk Lio, or any of you, by putting on an act? You don’t think Tennant and Hollis would figure out his game and put him down?”
With each challenge, they all flinch, and Antonio looks at the floor, his head bowing, shielding himself from me.
“He doesn’t need to be anyone but himself,” Ignacio argues. “We don’t want him to cut off pieces of himself to make it work. And so we’re concerned. It’s not a crime to make sure Tennant isn’t taking advantage of his vulnerable state, and to express that we don’t agree with his choices.”
“I think telling someone you’re not going to respect their name, and insisting they’re wrong, is the crime here, Princess,” Jayden says smoothly.
Ignacio flushes and bows his head.
“Look at me, Bello,” I order.
Antonio’s chocolate eyes meet mine, and the pain in them is staggering, but while in other instances they could sway me, this isn’t one of those times.
“Why is Tennant upset?”
He winces and his bottom lip trembles. “We disrespected Allesandro’s choice.
We…we discounted all the progress he’s made, because he’s not healing in the same way we did.
” He heaves a big breath, his shoulders rising and falling as he looks at his brothers.
“Javi gave us a come to Jesus. He…said we were using our family connection as a weapon.”
“He was right,” Marcus says so quietly that if I wasn’t watching his lips, I would have missed it.
I frown. “Where’s Javi now?” I’m surprised the psychiatrist isn’t in here putting them further in their place…or stabbing them.
Marcus shrugs. “He said his piece then hightailed it out of here. He…didn’t seem like himself. Was more…emotional than I’ve known him to be.”
Fuck.
A tension headache starts to creep in, my temples throbbing slightly as it settles. The stiffness in my neck and back preludes the pain that’ll wash over me soon enough.
“So, let me get this straight,” Keegan says, his voice deeper and more firm than I’ve ever heard it before.
I glance at my friend, taken slightly aback by the dark expression on his face as his steel gray eyes watch our Boys carefully.
“Sandro told you personal, vulnerable information about himself, tried to connect with you, as he now understands what it’s like to have a dominant caring for him, what it feels to give your trust to someone so completely as a Boy, and you told him you didn’t agree?
That he had to be what you want him to be, and that you don’t even have the decency to call him by his preferred name?
Never mind that it’s not much different than calling Doc Doc, or Emilio Lio.
A name is a name, and you don’t get to dictate what someone wants to be called.
“I’m very disappointed in you, Tease. You had the unique opportunity to reassure someone you claim to love, to encourage them to embrace their submissive side, and instead, you what?
Put him down? Insisted he stay the same?
Further hurt himself by being someone he never was?
Help me understand, because I certainly have no idea what you were thinking. ”
“I think,” Jayden says, “we should get our Boys’ interpretations of what happened and proceed from there. We have the bare bones of the story. They were in the wrong, enough that Javi had to get involved, which tells me all I need to know…”
I sigh, because the physical therapist isn’t wrong. We know enough to understand our Boys are in deep shit. Whatever else they have to say can be said between sub and Dom… It’ll help figure out suitable punishments that way.
“Very well. Come, Bello.” I don’t look at anyone else as I grab Antonio by the wrist and drag him out of the room. We make it down the hall before I stop him, shoving him against the wall, and place my fingers under his chin to lift his gaze to mine.
“Sir… I wasn’t wrong. He isn’t Sandro. He—”
“Quiet. If you’re only going to dig yourself a bigger hole, I don’t want to hear it.”
“But, Sir!”
“It is not your choice, Antonio.”
He winces at my use of his full name. “It’s not wrong to want my former Master to be happy and healthy.”
“No,” I agree. “But it sounds like you weren’t making sure he was okay, but rather questioning his choices. If he were still Il Padrone, you wouldn’t have done that, would you?”
He hesitates but shakes his head. “No, but that’s the problem! He’s not Il Padrone right now. He’s…he’s someone wearing my Master’s face, but I don’t know who that person is!”
I sigh and stop holding him so firmly against the wall.
“I don’t think he does either, Bello. That’s the whole point.
He’s trying to figure out who and what he is, and having the Boys, the family he loves so fiercely, question him…
I can only imagine how bad of a blow that was.
No wonder Ten was so pissed. He takes his title as protector seriously. ”
Antonio winces and tears fill his eyes, and I think reality hits him. He sags and I catch him, holding him up. “Fuck… I fucked up, didn’t I?”
I nod and hold him to me, letting him cry against my chest. “Yeah, Bello, you did.”
He clings to me, and we stay there for a long moment before I pull him back and kiss away his tears. “It’s okay. You’re okay. I got you.” He looks up at me, so lost and vulnerable that I want to sweep him up and reassure him, but I can’t, not yet. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”
Threading our fingers together, I lead him to the medical suite. He looks at me in confusion when we stop outside Nario’s door.
“You’re not going to punish me?”
I chuckle, low and dark. “Oh, no, I am. Just not now. Those feelings of shame and guilt you have? I want you to wallow in them. I want you to know there’s a punishment coming your way for being disrespectful and rude to someone you claim to love.
I spanked your ass once for that before, remember?
” He nods. Neither of us could forget that first time, after we first broke away from the old Bosses and he tried to undermine Lio.
It was our first true step as dominant and submissive.
It was the first time I let our Stars into my heart.
“Since this is the second time you’ve done it, the punishment will be more severe, but it will happen on my terms, not yours. Now, go inside and sit with the Stars. I have to check on Javi before I can join you.” I kiss him firmly, then open the door and give him a gentle nudge before leaving.
Walking away is hard, but…the time apart will help reinforce this part of his punishment. It’ll get his mind whirling, without the risk of spiraling too much, as he has the task of sitting with our Boys to help keep him grounded.
It’s not often I employ my more sadistic tendencies, but when I do? It’s memorable for us all.
Pulling out my phone, I send Leandro a text as I head down to Javi’s office. He thankfully replies right away, and directs me away from the medical suite, back to the front of the house, to the bathroom closest to the main sitting room.
Knocking on the closed door in warning, I test the handle, surprised to find it unlocked. Walking into the restroom, which is far fancier than a bathroom needs to be, but then I suppose it’s to put on a good show for any guests, I find Javi curled up on the tiled flooring.
Shutting the door behind me, but not latching it, I cross the space and crouch down beside him. “Javi,” I say firmly, hoping my voice is modulated correctly so as to not come across too harshly.
He shivers at the sound of his name, but doesn’t otherwise move. “I’m going to touch you,” I warn him, before doing just that.
Turning him onto his back, I meet his pain-filled mismatched eyes. He whimpers, and something inside me twists. This is worse than when he broke down in my arms yesterday morning.
I don’t hesitate to scoop him up, sitting on my ass and cradling him in my lap. “I got you,” I whisper. “You’re okay. I’ve got you now.”
He doesn’t cry, but he trembles, soulful whines escaping his throat, and hitting all the soft places in me that he’s unabashedly claimed.
I kiss his head. “I got you, Javi. It’s okay.”
“I’m all alone,” he says, just loud enough to be heard.
“I… They have a family who loves them, and they’re actively choosing to throw it away because that’s easier than trying to understand.
Meanwhile, I have no one. Daniel doesn’t want me now that Ely is gone.
And Ely…she was the only one who loved me.
She…she tried to get me to go home, but—but… ”
I grab his hair tightly in my fist and pull his head back, forcing him to meet my eyes.
“But, nothing. This is your home. We are your family. I’m sorry you lost her, and you’re allowed to grieve however you need to, but get this through your head, you stubborn duck, you are mine.
That means you will never be alone again.
My Boys and I? We are your family now. My lovers will protect you as fiercely as they’ll protect each other and the Boys.
You never have to question whether you’re wanted or not, because you are mine. ”
He shakes so hard that I’m worried he’s going to fall off my lap, so I hold him tight enough to leave bruises, but he doesn’t complain. If anything, that seems to help settle him. “You…can’t mean that,” he manages to get out.
I tighten my grip on his hair. “I am not a liar, Paperotto. You’re mine. To care for, to guide, to…love. You’re not alone. Not ever again.”
He whimpers. “I’ve been so lonely.”
“I know. I know. I’m sorry. From now on, you’re welcome wherever I am. I don’t care if I’m with my Boys, or my lovers, or all six of them. You’re part of me, Javi. And that means, where I go, you’re welcome to go as well.”
“You…you mean that?”
I kiss him, hard and deep, biting at his lip until I taste blood. Pulling back, I swipe at the tears that have finally fallen from his eyes.
“Yes, Piccolo.”
And I do. It’ll take a while for Javi to believe me, I think.
I don’t know his story, but what I do know of him tells me he’s never had anyone except Ely before.
I plan on changing that, but that can only happen with time, and showing up every time he needs me to.
I’m not worried. Javi will learn eventually, and we have plenty of time for me to show him. I’m a patient Daddy.
Javi snuggles against me, giving me all his trust and weight, even as my ass goes numb from sitting on the hard floor. I don’t dare move, though. Not when he needs this more than I need to feel my lower body.
My Paperotto is worth everything, even some discomfort, and one day, he’ll believe it too.