Chapter 1
Tobias
“You’re fuckin’ late.” Tucker greets me as I walk in the door of our parents’ house, his voice a sharp whisper. “Mom’s pissed.”
I scoff. “Don’t lie. She hasn’t even noticed I’m not here.
She’s too busy talking about her future grandchildren and trying to convince Mariah to allow cameras at her baby shower.
” I close the door we all use to come and go at will.
Quietly. Just in case. “And you better not even point out I’m the last one here, or I’ll kick your ass. ”
My mom’s been a little prickly about us showing up for family dinners lately.
When we all accidentally forgot Thanksgiving, she sort of went off the deep end.
Decided we all work too much—and are too single—and that she needed to do something about it.
Thankfully, she seems to have forgotten that plan now that my oldest brother, Titus, is happily engaged and about to give her the grandbabies she’s been itching for.
“I won’t tell her you were still at work, if you promise to help me make sure she sets her sights on Trevor or Walker next.” Tucker shakes his head, lips pressing into a thin line. “Because there’s no way I want her sticking her nose in my private life.”
“You should’ve thought about that before you let her catch you with an unidentified woman in your bed when you were supposed to be at Thanksgiving dinner.” I give him a serious look. “A woman who clearly didn’t understand the parameters of your arrangement.”
I love my baby brother. He’s a hard worker, smart, driven, easy-going and laid-back.
He’s also a slut.
But usually, he’s an ethical slut. Tucker has always been upfront with women about his complete disinterest in a relationship of any kind.
I’ve seen firsthand how bluntly he puts it to the women hoping to find their way into his bed.
That doesn’t mean there still haven’t been a few who thought they would be the exception.
And my mother happened to walk into his house while he was attempting to nicely run one of them out.
“I told that woman it was only sex.” He throws both arms out as we walk down the hall. “I tell all of them it’s only sex. I don’t know how much clearer I can be.”
“Maybe you should write up a contract they have to sign.” I’m only half joking. “Or you could try to keep your dick in your pants for a few months. It might do you some good.”
Tucker wrinkles his nose. “Fuck no. That sounds awful.” He smirks at me. “No offense.”
I shoot him a glare. It’s no one’s business how long it’s been since I’ve had a woman in my bed. Including mine. I try like hell not to think about it. It’s humiliating. Embarrassing.
Depressing.
Also unexplainable. As in, I don’t know how to explain why it is the way it is. And I’ll be damned if I’m going to discuss it with my fuck-boy baby brother.
As I expected, our mother doesn’t even notice my arrival as Tucker and I enter the kitchen. She’s focused entirely on Mariah, discussing possible shower dates, along with themes and favorite flowers.
Titus sits close to his new fiancée, looking proud as shit. I can’t blame him. He should be proud. Mariah is awesome. She’s smart, kind and sweet. She’s also one hell of a good cook, which is how she found her way into my brother’s life to start with.
After losing his childhood sweetheart and their unborn baby in a car accident, he’d all but stopped living. And eating. After over a decade of watching him suffer, Mom decided she was fed up, and hired him a live-in chef.
Who he’s now staring at like she’s the answer to his prayers.
She probably is.
Maybe I should start praying.
Tucker and I sidle up next to where our next oldest brother, Trevor, is standing at the island with our cousin Walker, deep in conversation. I grab an olive from one of the platters spread across the counter, popping it into my mouth before asking. “What’s up?”
“Same shit.” Trevor blows out a loud breath as he scrubs one hand over his eyes before counting off his fingers as he lists out issues.
“We still can’t figure out who tried to breach our system through Alaskan Security.
” One finger. “My assistant is a pain in the ass.” Two fingers.
“And we’re all about to suffer for the ideas Titus is putting into our mother’s head. ” Third finger goes up.
“Your assistant is a douche canoe.” I shove in a carrot dipped in some sort of creamy concoction, chewing through it aggressively as I think about Dan. “He better hope I don’t catch him being a fucking creeper to any of the women at the office. I’ll stick an air hose up his ass and open the valve.”
I’ve overheard a couple of the women talking, and it’s got me looking for any reason to work out a little frustration. Unfortunately, unless I catch him in the act, or someone makes a formal complaint, I can’t blow him up like a balloon.
Trevor wrinkles his nose. “Please don’t. The last thing I need to add to my list is finding a cleaning crew willing to scrub douche canoe residue off the walls.”
“Then fire him, because it’s only a matter of time before it happens. He’s got that look to him.” I saw it the first time Trevor brought Dan to my wing of the building. Dude reeked of prickish entitlement.
Trevor scoffs. “Now you tell me.”
“How in the hell didn’t you see it?” I shove a couple crackers into my mouth, trying to shut up my growling stomach. “He’s not very good at hiding how big of an asshole he is.”
Trevor’s expression flattens. “I don’t know if you’ve heard, but the same thing is frequently said about me.”
“Not so much now that Titus had to go and ruin shit for all of us.” Tucker scowls at where our mother sits next to the happy couple. “I hope to god she goes in order. It will buy me some time to figure out how to get out of whatever bullshit she tries to drop on me.”
“She’s already out of order.” I tip my head at Walker. “Otherwise she would have started with him.”
“Don’t put that evil on me.” Walker takes a sip of the beer clutched in his hand. “A woman is the last thing I need.”
“The last?” I angle a brow at him. “What’s the first?”
Our cousin, who’s more like a brother, gives me a grin. “A woman.”
“Are you boys just going to stand there, or are you going to start bringing food to the table?” Our mother claps her hands. “We can’t make Mariah wait. She’s got babies to feed.”
“Babies who are gonna like me best.” Tucker shoulder checks me as he grabs the platter of roast chicken. “Hope you didn’t think you were gonna be the favorite uncle, Toby.”
“And how the fuck do you reckon you’re gonna be the favorite uncle?” I shove at him as I reach for the sweet potatoes. “You’ve never even held a baby.”
“So?” Tucker kicks at my left foot, trying to knock it out from under me as we round the island. “Neither have you.”
“Yeah, but I’ve got a dog. Kids love dogs.” Copper has been my partner in crime for almost a decade now. I’ve bought her the best snacks, the most expensive food, and I let her hump just about anything she wants. It’s time for her to pay me back.
And she can do that by being the reason Titus and Mariah’s twins want to come to my house all the time.
“Copper’s old, and the only things she’s interested in is humping throw pillows, and cheese.” Tucker steps in front of me, attempting to block my path. “No way is she gonna put up with a couple toddlers pulling on her ears.” His lips twitch. “Plus all the humping.”
Fuck. He does kind of have a point. Which pisses me all the way off.
Enough I fall behind and he beats me to the table, placing the chicken right in front of Mariah with a dramatic flourish. “Here you go, Miss Mariah.” He looks pointedly at her belly. “And babies.”
I don’t miss the way my mother watches my youngest brother with mild interest. Or maybe that’s calculation I see in her gaze.
Thank God Tucker beat me to the punch, because the last thing I want is her looking at me that way. I know her meddling worked out well for Titus, but my situation is different. My situation is all my own doing, and there isn’t shit I can do to change it.
Not now, anyway. It’s way too late for that.
Everyone grabs a seat, and I let Tucker take the spot at Mariah’s other side, choosing instead to sit as far from my mother as possible. Let Tucker have Mariah’s attention. My mother’s comes with it. Plus, it’s not like the babies in her belly can hear or see what’s going on.
But it’s becoming clear I’m going to need to bring my A-game if I want to be top uncle.
I’m not too worried about Trevor. No way will he want kids running around his house, fucking up all his fancy shit.
I know he’ll love them, and be a great uncle, but he’s not competition.
I don’t know that Walker is either. My cousin likes kids, but he appears to be doing his best to lay low.
It seems like something’s on his mind, I’m just not sure what it is.
Probably figuring out how to keep my mother out of his business.
Everyone passes the food around, and thankfully conversation moves into discussions of work and tasks that have to be done around the property as the weather warms up.
There’s always way too much shit to do between running McKinley Security Systems and maintaining the three hundred acres where we all live.
But I like it that way. I like the distraction.
It keeps me from thinking too hard about where I could be if I wasn’t such a dumbass.
As the dessert Mariah brought is being passed around—tonight it’s some sort of insane molten chocolate pudding cake and homemade butterscotch ice cream—my future sister-in-law circles back to my mother’s current favorite topic of conversation.
“Maybe we can get together this weekend to finalize some plans for the baby shower.” She grins.
“I can bring over cookies and we can figure things out.”
The table gets quiet. I glance up from where I’ve been shoveling in mouthfuls of sweet, gooey, chocolatey goodness, and catch my mother’s eyes as they bounce from me to Mariah. The tension in the air has me sitting up straighter, trying to figure out what in the hell is going on.
My mother clears her throat, reaching up to tuck a loose bit of hair behind one ear. “I actually won’t be in town this weekend.”
“Oh, that’s fine.” Mariah doesn’t seem to notice the weirdness at the table. “Are you going somewhere exciting?”
My brothers won’t look at me, and my mom won’t stop shooting strange glances my way.
What the fuck is happening?
“Ted and I are actually taking a quick trip to California.” My mother reaches for her wine, swallowing down what’s left of it in one go.
I wish I could do the same, but I learned pretty quickly alcohol doesn’t help my cause any. I’m grateful my mom’s explanation is brief, because whatever is going on with my ex-girlfriend Brooke—since I’m sure that’s why she’s going to California—is none of my business.
That’s actually probably what’s going on. Business. Brooke’s wealthy fiancé owns some vineyard out there, and he pitched a partnership with my mother to create a few namesake blends. Which is fine. Brooke and my mother have remained in contact, and developed a friendship. I’m happy for them.
It’s fucking great. Fabulous. Amazing.
It doesn’t make my life more difficult at all hearing my mother talk about the woman I’ve never been able to forget.
“That sounds like fun. What are you doing while you’re there?” Mariah continues on, oblivious to the waters she’s wading into.
I’m not. They’re deep and dark and will suck a man under in no time flat, leaving him fighting for air.
And I don’t want any part of it.
Grabbing my silverware, I have my other hand wrapped around my plate, preparing to stand, right as my mother says, “We have a wedding to attend.”
The room gets so quiet I can hear the blood rushing through my ears. The air sawing into my lungs. It takes everything I have to move my feet. Putting one boot in front of the other, I carry my plate to the kitchen, put it in the sink, and head straight for the door.
“Toby, wait.” My mother’s voice calls after me.
I don’t plan to stop, but she must have taken off at a full sprint—I’ll have to kick her personal trainer's ass for making that possible—and manages to grab my arm just as I reach the door, halting my escape.
“You knew this was coming, sweetheart.” There’s compassion in her voice and worry in her expression. “Brooke deserves to be happy.”
“She does.” I won’t argue the fact. Brooke does deserve to be happy.
She deserves everything. Including a man who’s ready and willing to give it to her. I had my chance, and I fucked it up.
My mother’s eyes move over my face. “So do you.”
Maybe, but I don’t know that it’s in the cards for me.
“I’ll see you when you get back.” I lean in, pressing a kiss to my mom’s cheek. “Be safe.”
I step out into the night, breathing the cool air deep into my lungs.
I’ve kicked myself millions of times over the years for the way things ended between Brooke and me, but I’m not sure they could have ever been different.
I can’t move to California, and I would never ask her to pass up an opportunity for me. That wouldn’t be fair.
I still should have done everything in my power to convince her to stay.
Going to where my side-by-side sits, I drop into the seat behind the wheel. I don’t even remember the drive home, and before I know what’s happened, I’m pulling into my garage, parking next to the line of vehicles I keep buying thinking eventually I’ll have enough to be happy.
So far, no such luck.
I go inside, and manage a smile as Copper rushes to greet me, dancing around, her pink polished toenails tapping against the hardwood.
“Hey, pretty girl.” I grab one of the dog treats Mariah taught me how to make her, crouching down as I pass it off. “Were you good while I was gone?”
I reach out to give her some attention, but Copper just snags the treat and runs away, abandoning me now that she has what she wants. After crunching through the biscuit, she curls up in one of her many beds and is snoring almost immediately.
Tucker’s probably right about her being too old to be excited about helping me become the favored uncle.
She’s got about one good sprint in her day, and usually wastes it making me chase her around outside to ensure she doesn’t get eaten by a mountain lion.
A puppy would be a much better option when it comes to entertaining toddlers.
I narrow my eyes, looking from where Copper is snoozing to the spot I left my laptop sitting. Smirking, I grab a drink from the fridge, my laptop from the counter, and flop onto the couch. Opening up a browser, I type a search into the bar.
What kind of dogs are best with kids?