CHAPTER SIX #2
I need her so much it’s killing me, but that’s not what’s important right now.
Clearly the girl I knew just a few months ago isn’t standing here in front of me.
She’s always been strong, intelligent, and the one that I trusted more than myself.
She’s still all of those things, but she’s been through so much on her own that she doesn’t feel like she can trust or rely on me.
If I want her back, if I want her to trust me, I’m going to have to play by her rules.
But that doesn’t mean I can’t crack some skulls while I’m doing it.
"What about their voice?" I ask carefully, reaching around her the way I would a terrified animal ready to bolt away from me. I slide the stall door all the way open even though there’s plenty of space for her to exit. I peek out to see the lady who manages the barn talking to some girl.
"They never spoke,” she says, “But they had small feet. Maybe I’m used to you and your brothers having giant feet, but they seemed really small.” She swallows hard like her throat is hurting, and I know it's from the asthma attack or maybe the inhaler.
I rake a hand through my hair, forcing myself to think instead of letting my temper make decisions for me.
Every Saint on campus owns one of those masks.
My brothers and I are the biggest guys on the hockey team as well as in the Saints, which means anyone would look small compared to us.
That realization does absolutely nothing to cool the rage taking permanent residence inside of me.
"I'm going to figure out who did this,” I finally say, not wanting to weigh her mind down with my poorly drawn-together thoughts.
Blair studies me for a long second before asking, "Did you get any more notes after I left?"
I shake my head.
"No. But I wasn’t around much. I spent all of my time looking for you, but it was like you fully vanished.
" I let out a humorless laugh, rubbing a hand across the back of my neck as every dead end from the last few months flashes through my mind.
"I lost my fucking mind when I couldn't find you, Blair.
" I don’t mention how many casualties there were or how my brothers helped me.
For the first time since I found her in Beau's stall, something in her expression softens. It isn't enough to erase the distance between us, but I catch a glimpse of the girl I spent months hoping I'd see again before she lowers her eyes.
"We both made choices, Elijah." Her voice is barely above a whisper. "Now we have to live with the consequences." I know she’s not talking about her leaving or me rushing her off the phone. She’s talking about the night Jonathan died.
Before I can figure out what the hell I'm supposed to say to that, she's already slipping past me.
I catch the faint scent of peppermint as she brushes by, and then she's gone, running down the aisle of the barn toward the exit.
Everything in me screams to follow her. I want to grab her, pull her into my chest, and hold her until she relaxes.
That always worked for me and my little dove.
She leaned into my possessiveness, and I reveled in her softness.
I know Blair Winthrop like the back of my hand, even this new version of her. Something innate inside of me knows exactly what she needs, and I’m going to give her just that. I’m going to spend the rest of my life giving her anything and everything she wants.
Fuck the Black Crown Society, fuck our parents, and more than anything fuck the Choosing Ceremony.
I will not let them pair her with anyone else, even if it kills me.
I stay rooted where I am for another second, staring after her long after the doors close behind her.
I pull out my phone and text my brothers our code word, dumpling, which means it’s an emergency and we need to meet.
Noah chose the words when we were kids, and he turned into a giant toddler when Ben and I suggested changing it.
I know Blair is safe right now because everyone on campus knows that St. Augustine is heavily surveilled.
That’s why they ambushed Blair in the back of a horse stall, but I’m not taking any chances that she won’t be fully protected.
I trust my brothers with my life, and I trust them with her too. Paris is a giant, glitter-covered, pain in my ass, but she’s special to my brother Ben; therefore, I afford her the same protection as he will give to Blair.
My brothers and I have been trained by our father’s soldiers.
Whoever decided to make my girl a target probably doesn’t realize that we’re not just pretty boy hockey players who can throw a punch solely because we’re big.
My brothers and I can take a weapon apart and put it back together blindfolded and gut a target like a deer with such precision and ease that it brought a smile to our father’s face once.
I think that’s the only time I’ve seen that man’s face move from stone.
I hope these fuckers know what they started, because they certainly don’t know what they’re up against.
I hear a loud, “AHEM,” and roll my eyes up into my skull because I already know who it is.
My actual biggest hater, Karin, stands a few stall lengths away with that stupid fly swatter she smacked Noah in the forehead with once.
I mean, he did stoop down to her height so she could reach him, but still.
She opens her mouth, but I beat her to it.
"I don't want to be in your stupid fucking barn any more than you want me here.
" She smirks because she knows she gets under my skin, so I storm off to go meet my brothers.
She did make sure Beau got all the special treats Blair usually gave him every night, and for that reason, I will let her keep her fly swatter.