5. Luke
Chapter 5
Luke
You don’t have to be alone.
The words snagged like a barb in Luke’s mind. He did, didn’t he? That was what he’d told himself since he’d lost his squad. He was better off alone. It was safer that way for everyone. He’d rather die alone than watch someone else he cared about get hurt. His squad were like brothers to him. Losing them had nearly destroyed him. He couldn’t go through that again.
Malachi’s red gaze was far too knowing, and Luke wondered for a moment if halflings could read minds. He didn’t think so. They’d never mentioned it in the guild’s extensive demonology classes. Was he really just so easy for Malachi to read?
“I could join you on your hunts,” Malachi offered, easy as you please.
Luke’s thoughts ground to a halt. “What? Why? Why would you do something like that?”
“Because I’m immortal. Those snarling beasts can’t kill me unless they rip my head from my shoulders, and none of them are powerful enough to do something like that.”
“No, why ?” Luke asked, clenching his jaw so hard it hurt. “Why would you want to? Why would you help me kill demons? Why ?” What game was this halfling playing at? He was already risking everything by standing here and having this conversation. He couldn’t be seen with this demon, and he certainly couldn’t patrol with him.
Malachi’s head tilted like a predator measuring the distance to its prey. Luke felt weighed . “I can tell you a believable lie or I can tell you the truth, which you won’t like.”
What kind of choice was that? “The truth,” Luke said firmly. “Always the truth.”
Malachi’s smile was sharp around the edges. “The truth is, you’re mine. I knew it from the moment I laid eyes on you. You’re beautiful and fascinating and everything about you has captivated me.”
Luke’s lips parted in shock. “What?”
“I brought you the intel about the sagdrannon because I knew it would please you to kill it. I’m offering to aid you on your hunts, because I see how lonely you are.”
“No.” He shook his head firmly. This couldn’t be happening.
“I told you you wouldn’t like it.”
“I don’t just not like it . What you’re saying is dangerous. I can’t be seen with you. That’s why I came here?—”
“And summoned me,” Malachi said. “You came here, to a deserted location, and summoned me. You didn’t have to. You had to know that whatever answers I had for you wouldn’t be anything you wanted to hear. You knew I didn’t tell you about the sagdrannon because I wanted to repent for my sins or do a good deed. You summoned me…” He leaned in , dangerously close, and Luke inhaled the scent of smoke and whiskey, “because you wanted to see me. And this was the only way you knew how.”
Luke shook his head stubbornly. “No.”
“You’re as intrigued by me as I am by you.”
“No.” That wasn’t true. It couldn’t be. He’d just wanted answers.
But… he had come out to the middle of nowhere, to a cemetery he knew none of the squads would be near. Willingly going anywhere near a halfling after what happened with Hawk was asking for trouble, but this was worse. He’d not only sought Malachi out, he’d disobeyed Sloan’s direct order to kill him on sight. Summoning a demon, even a halfling, was forbidden. Summoning one for anything less than dire, apocalyptic reasons was against the rules, and any rituals like this had to be logged and approved by the guild beforehand.
And now this one was saying—what? That Luke belonged to him? That was insane.
Malachi was smiling again, infuriatingly smug and knowing. “You know I’m right.”
“You can’t just claim a human being,” Luke insisted. “Don’t I get a say?”
“You do. Of course. If you turn me away, you’ll never have to know I’m there. I’ll be in the shadows or just out of sight, like I was at the hospital.”
Heat burned through Luke. He’d sworn he felt eyes on him at the hospital but chalked it up to nervous adrenaline about the coming fight.
“You were—at the hospital?” he asked haltingly.
“I’m never far from you these days,” Malachi said like it was a foregone conclusion. “You don’t have to know it. I can watch over you from afar. Keep you safe.”
Luke’s heart thundered in his chest. He was never safe. That was the nature of his job. It was why his body was riddled with scars and ached when it rained. He was only thirty-four, but he felt like an old man. He’d given everything for the guild—almost given his life, too. All he did was fight for the cause. He’d lost friends and shield-brothers. He’d had so many failed relationships he stopped trying. He had nothing but his blades, a bottle of painkillers, and the stubborn will to keep going.
He scrambled for a response, something to drive home how ridiculous this all sounded. “Watch over me? Keep me safe? You talk like you’re some sort of… guardian angel.”
One corner of Malachi’s mouth quirked. “You might be the first person ever to compare a demon to an angel. I just protect what’s mine. That’s all.”
He was crazy. He was a crazy demon , and he’d somehow fixated on Luke. This was dangerous. But… he hadn’t tried to harm Luke in any way. Hadn’t harmed anyone at all, in fact. He’d actually helped Luke save a bunch of children by telling him about the sagdrannon. Maybe he’d done it for selfish reasons, but that didn’t make those kids any less safe.
But he was a demon. Every charitable thought he had circled back to that. No matter what he’d done or why, he was still a demon. Associating with him was forbidden. It put everything he’d worked for, his whole life , in jeopardy. He couldn’t entertain this any longer.
“You’re not ready yet,” Malachi said, reading Luke’s thoughts eerily well. “That’s okay. I’ve got nothing but time.”
Luke struggled to cobble together a mask he hoped was cold and aloof. If Malachi’s amusement was any indication, he fell short of the mark. “I don’t need your help,” he declared. “I don’t need you . I don’t know what game you’re playing or what you expect to come of this, but it’s over. So just stay away from me.” He backed out of arm’s reach and turned away.
Malachi clicked his tongue. “Don’t worry, Luke. When that stops being true, I won’t be far away.”
A shiver rolled down Luke’s spine, but he didn’t turn around.
Luke resolved to forget about the captivating halfling. He wouldn’t jeopardize his career, his life as a paladin, just because Malachi unilaterally decided Luke should belong to him. That wasn’t how relationships worked—not that the demon was interested in a real, human relationship. Whatever was going on, Luke wasn’t falling for it, so he put the whole thing from his mind and threw himself into his work.
He finished his two weeks of archive duty without incident, and when he hadn’t heard from Malachi again by the time it was over, he began to hope the whole thing had blown over and life would go back to normal. It didn’t matter that Malachi was the most attractive man he’d ever seen or how easily he seemed to read Luke. He was a demon, and Luke wasn’t stupid.
A bright and sunny morning at HQ saw him in the cafeteria getting breakfast. A wide, rectangular room with stained glass windows on the far wall, it was filled with long tables and a laminate wood floor. At the front of the room, near the entrance to the kitchen, there was a lengthy buffet line, bright with warming bulbs and steam trays to keep the food warm. He went through the line, half awake, and fetched himself a generous cup of coffee before claiming a seat near the end of a table.
He preferred eating his meals here, all told, because the food was always better than anything he managed to make at home. Digging his fork into some perfectly scrambled eggs, sunny yellow and seasoned just right, he’d barely taken a bite when a tray sat down across from him.
“Mind if I sit here?” Nathan asked, casting him a cheery smile.
“Not at all.” He’d always liked Nathan. If he were going to join anyone else’s squad, it would’ve been Nathan Accardi’s. The man was a couple of years younger than Luke, and he’d always treated the paladins under him well, putting his squad’s needs first the way a good captain should. He cared about the guild, the cause, but primarily, his people. With his chestnut hair, stormy gray eyes, and angular jaw, he was classically handsome. Luke found himself envious more than once over the years, especially following the attack that scarred his face. Nathan had been a paladin almost as long as Luke, but he had a fraction of the scars to show for it. Luke felt grizzled, hardened by the invisible war they fought, and Nathan’s baby smooth face served as a harsh reminder that Luke alone had been dealt a particularly vicious hand. The trouble was that Nathan was just so frustratingly likable .
“How’ve you been, Luke? I hardly see you around these days.”
“Busy. Killed something called a sagdrannon a couple of weeks ago.” That was how conversations usually went at the guild. Small talk consisted of what interesting kills one had recently had .
“I heard. Stealing kids from the hospital, right? Nasty.”
“Mm-hm. What’s new with you? Has Sloan talked to you about filling the empty slot in your squad?”
Nathan’s smile dimmed at the reminder, then brightened. “Yeah, he did, actually. I’ll be getting Judah. He’s very excited. He graduates next month, and then I’ll be taking him out on his first patrol.”
Luke chortled. “Good. Kid’s been gnawing at the bit to see some action. And I’m sure it’ll be nice having a full squad again.”
Nathan’s smile tightened at the edges. Before he could speak, Luke scrambled to undo what he’d said.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up. Just?—”
“No, no, it’s fine,” Nathan said, waving away his concerns. His gaze traveled the room as he replied. “Yes, it’s been hard being short a person. Alex was… dedicated and talented. Filling the hole he left behind will be difficult, but I believe Judah is up to the task.”
Dedicated, Luke thought, but not dedicated enough to stay.
Nathan glanced at him and did a double-take at whatever his expression was doing. “You don’t agree?”
Luke tried to lighten his scowl, but he wasn’t sure it worked. “No, no, I think Judah will be fine. That’s not—he’s a good kid. That’s not what I was thinking.”
“Share with the class, Luke. It’ll do you good to have a conversation with another human once in a while.” He smiled as he spoke, letting Luke know it was a joke.
It was true, he kept to himself a lot. Had, in fact, since he’d lost his squad. In the beginning, his appointments with Maxwell wrung him out and left him feeling hollow. He was still required for regular sessions with Maxwell, in fact, but they were less frequent and didn’t exhaust him. They’d hashed out everything that happened that night years ago, and Maxwell thankfully didn’t force him to go into much detail about his nightmares these days. At this point, he’d heard it all before. New nightmares usually just meant an offer for sleep meds, which Luke always refused.
He shook himself, focusing on the man in front of him once more. “If I must,” he groused, though it lacked heat.
Nathan smiled, a weak thing that didn’t touch his eyes. “So?”
Luke sighed. “I’m sure you’ve heard it before, Nate. I just don’t understand why Hawk, if he was as dedicated as you say, would get involved with a demon like that.”
Nathan shook his head. “He was desperate for revenge against the demon that killed his family. Desperation drives even the hardiest of men to do crazy things, I guess.”
Luke hummed. “Do you think he’s… happy? I know a couple of squads have seen him a time or two around that club.”
“I hope he is. I hope that demon is being—good to him?” The last part was questioning, as though he wasn’t sure such a phrase could even apply to a demon. “From what I’ve heard, he looked healthy. That’s something, at least.”
For a moment, Luke pondered it. What would he have if he didn’t have the guild? He owed everything to them. His childhood, his job, his skills. He’d gotten his car and cell phone through the guild. Fighting demons was the only thing he’d ever done. The only thing he’d ever wanted to do. He couldn’t imagine being cut off from the guild.
But maybe Hawk didn’t feel the same. Maybe he’d met that black-eyed demon and realized he wanted something completely different for himself .
Unwittingly, red eyes appeared in his thoughts. Red eyes and porcelain white skin, a crooked smile and glossy black hair.
You don’t have to be alone.
The food turned to ash in his mouth, and his appetite disappeared. He set his fork down, his shoulders hunching as he rubbed the back of his neck.
It was better to be alone. Better to be here, doing what he knew, than to risk losing it all for an empty promise.