Chapter 2
Kaz
Eight years old
“Hey darling, why don’t you come sit over here with me?” An old man asks me as I sneak through the tables at Mommy’s work. His teeth are crooked and yellow and his nose is big but Mommy always says she has to be nice to the men at work. I want to be like her. She gets to dress up fancy and wear pretty makeup like a princess.
“I’m looking for my Mommy,” I reply, in my most grown up voice. “I can’t find my crayons and I want to color.” I put my hands on my hips and stand up tall, lifting my chin and smiling wide. My lashes flutter just like Mommy when she talks to men.
The old man chuckles and pats his leg. “Come sit here, darling. I’ll call someone over to find you some crayons.”
He seems so nice and I really do want to color so I hop up on his thigh, wiggling around to get comfortable. He grunts like I hurt him, making me freeze.
“I’m sorry. Did I hurt you?” Maybe he has a bad leg. Our neighbor has a bad leg and she’s always walking around with her cane, moaning.
“No, Darling.” His voice comes out gruff.
I continue looking around Mommy’s work, trying to find her in the crowd of people. My nose scrunches up when I see some of the nice ladies Mommy works with walking around with their boobies showing. Why aren’t they wearing the pretty outfits that they got all dressed up in? I turn to see another lady dancing for a man. She’s on his lap just like I am, except she is pushing her naked body against him. I look away quickly, embarrassed by what is happening.
“Don’t be ashamed, Darling. These beautiful women aren’t afraid to do what feels good,” the old man whispers in my ear. His breath is hot on my ear and it smells rotten. “Does this feel good?” He asks, rubbing his fingers on my thigh, just below the hem of my dress.
“My tummy hurts,” I reply, closing my eyes.
The old man hugs me closer to his body, surrounding me with his bad smell. “Shh, Darling, I’ll make you feel better.” My eyes snap open when his rough fingers work their way underneath my dress and slide higher.
“I shouldn’t be out here. Mommy told me not to leave the room.” I try to move off of the old man’s lap but he keeps me in place, his grip on me tightening. A lone tear slips down my face just as my eyes connect with Mommy’s. She’s naked up on a stage. The lights are shining on her brightly, while she dances to the music playing. She looks angry.
Suddenly, I’m ripped from the old man’s arms. I look up into the eyes of Miss Mary, Mommy’s boss. She looks at me worriedly before glaring at the old man.
“We were just talking,” he says, with his hands up.
Miss Mary covers my ears while saying something to him, before carrying me back to the room. “Stay here, Kazzy baby, okay?”
I nod my head and watch her walk out the door. Someone yells on the other side before the door slams open and my Mommy comes in. I run to her with my arms held wide, wanting her comfort. The sound of her slap echoes around the room, and I’m thrown to the floor. Tears fill my eyes and I look up to see her face red and angry.
“You almost got me fired, you little bitch. I told you not to leave this room. Stay here so I can finish my damn shift or next time I’ll make sure to leave you with one of those men out there," she gestures behind her with her thumb angrily.
“I’m so-sorry,” I try to say, but she’s already out the door, leaving the bitter taste of blood in my mouth and a pool of my tears on the floor.