Unloved Mate (Wolves Of Night Shade Pack)

1

Zeke

I told myself a lie for most of my life. I thought leaving my home would change everything, that it would bring me some sort of peace. And he’d never know I had always been in love with him. But it didn't. I was still in love with him. Now I’m working up the courage to confess what I feel for him, even if it’s too late, even if he already has a mate now. I was ready. I couldn’t hide behind the veil of lies and keep things to myself anymore. He needed to know how I felt.

Today I was returning to my home, Night Shade Pack, one of the most powerful werewolf packs in the country, their secrets protected by the forest of wild trees that surrounded their territory. My drive back to the pack started last night, and I was a few kilometers away from arriving at Night Shade. As I drove down the tarred road in the black CUV, my thoughts flew through the memories of my past, and I smiled, glancing over at the rearview mirror. None of my friends from the pack knew about my arrival. I wondered if they’d still remember me, especially considering that I’d spent the last decade as a part of The Eclipse. Even if they did, I had no intentions of reigniting the flame of old acquaintances for any reason. I just needed to see Valor and be on my way as soon as possible. The Eclipse—a group of solitary werewolves that helped wolf shifters who didn’t have a home to find their packs. We didn’t consider ourselves a pack, just a family of werewolves that channeled our existence into saving and protecting lives, pledging our honor to our cause and trusting each other. Every member of the Eclipse knew about each other’s past, including mine with Delta Valor O’Donnell of Night Shade pack. We felt it was a way of being open and hiding no secrets from one another. I had informed them about the temporary leave I was taking to return to Valor and promised to join them on their journey as soon as I had reunited with him.

A few more hours on the road and I was driving into the pack’s territory. The view went into dense forest trees with shadows of the moonlights peaking through the tall tree canopies. Clarifying with the patrol team, I continued my journey, driving through the forest path lined with wild clusters of trees that accentuated nature’s ambiance. I was here. I didn't dare to imagine what would happen between us. How he would look if he still had his big goofy smile and a big heart. If he had a mate. The thought of his heart belonging to another made me clutch the steering wheel and release a deep grunt. Was I ready for this?

The pack house came into view. It looked just like I recalled, although I noticed the minor changes made by the incumbent alpha now I was closer to the building. Logan Kade. My father always said that his destiny was for great things. I parked the vehicle around the fountain and climbed down from the car. As I shut the door, I took a sweep at how far the pack had come with my absence. It was looking better than the last time I saw it. I turned to the flight of stairs and ascended them until I got to the front porch, now closer to the wolf guards on duty. I smiled at them as they walked toward me and I put up my hands in surrender.

They might not recall who I was, and that was ok. There was no harm in reintroducing myself. “What business are you here for?”

“Relax. I’m not here to cause chaos. I’m here for Delta Valor.”

“Your name?”

“Ezekiel Wolfe?”

“You need to be patient enough to meet with the Alpha.”

The other one added.

“Mm.”

I let out a throaty growl as they parted way through the entrance, leading me into the common room and asking me to sit and wait for the Alpha, which I obliged to.

The sounds of the creaking floorboards pulled me out of my hazy thoughts about Valor and I rose to my feet and faced the Alpha, tilting my head in submission. He gave me a big smile as he pulled me into an embrace. “Ezekiel Wolfe.”

He said. He recalled my name. Well, that’s a pleasant surprise.

“Alpha.”

I chuckled.

“It’s been so long. I never thought I’d see you again after you abandoned the three year Sentinel program.”

“Don’t say that out loud. I could get kicked back in there.”

I leaned into his ears and whispered.

“How has it been?”

He gestured toward the couch and walked to the bar at the corner of the common room, returning with a bottle of vodka and glasses. He set it down on the table, filling both glasses.

“Sorry, I didn’t give anyone a heads-up I was coming. But it was only for a short while as I wanted to see Valor,”

I said and took the glass from him, taking a sip from the alcohol that burned as I gulped it down my throat. I caught his deplored look and adjusted on the couch, my brows arching in concern.

“Valor died.”

He hesitated for a while, but finally let the cat out of the bag. I stared at him in complete disbelief. It took me sometime before I could swallow the pain that came with his words. Valor was dead. but how? How could it be?

“Is he buried?”

I managed to croak.

“No. It’s been almost more than a month…”

“And he hasn’t…”

“We’re hoping for some miracle. My mate is adamant about continuing with his burial rites, something about a witch’s intuition. We’ve used magic to preserve his body.”

He explained. I gently set down the glass on the table and exhaled a deep sigh.

“Ca-n Can I s-see him?”

I stuttered the words out, and Logan put his hands on my shoulder, giving me a tight squeeze, a look of compassion flashing across his face. I had expected that Valor had come so far in life, but this, losing his life. It was too soon.

We headed up the stairs and took a turn down the hallway after we arrived on the second floor. I sighed and asked, “I heard you saying magic. Are there witches in the pack now?”

“Yes. A lot has changed since I became Alpha. Witches, werewolves. Even hounds. We’re all one now,”

he said. “I’m so sorry. That you didn’t get to see him one last time.”

“I’m happy about the progress you’ve made.”

I said, my heart still hurting from the new information I’ve learned. I was trying so hard to keep the tears that had welled in my eyes at bay. Just as it rolled down my cheeks, I swiped it off with the back of my palms.

We arrived in front of the room where they lay Valor. Logan reached for the door handle and twisted it, pushing the wooden frame backward and parting into the room. My heart broke even more when I saw him lying on the bed ahead of me, the room dimly lit by the golden yellow lights of the candle. We both stepped past the threshold and I narrowed my gaze at Logan, who let out an aching breath.

“You can stay as long as you wish to.”

Logan proclaimed and left me in the room. From the way he sounded, he hated this as much as I did. Perhaps they had grown to become good friends after I left the pack. He turned on his heels and walked out of the room, shutting the door as he left.

An expression of deep melancholy stretched across my lips as I stepped closer to Valor’s body, watching the paleness of his skin and the heaviness in his eyes. Oh, the monstrous death he must have died. I touched him. He was cold to the bone, and I withdrew my hand instantly, like I had dipped my fingers into a bucket of ice. I came here to speak my mind and pour out my heart to him. But he was gone. Shame that he couldn’t hear my confessions, that he didn’t live to see this day. Perhaps if I hadn’t taken that long. If I had just got it over when I had the chance earlier. Everything would have changed. He would still be alive. I would have kept him alive if I was around, but I wasn’t. I just ran off like a scared little bitch. Now I’m back only to discover I had lost my revenge. That I had lost him.

“I guess no one would have to pick you now you’re dead. I wonder why they haven’t disposed of you.”

I spat, disgust hissing from my lip as I worked up the nerve to push back strands of his pale brunette hair. This time I didn’t pull back because of the cold, but something else… his heartbeat and the movement of his fingers.

Maybe I was just imagining things because I backtracked and got a good look at him; he just lay there, pale, immobile, just frozen in the space of time. Forever.

I pulled out the picture I had hidden in my black leather jacket. It was me and him at the clubhouse about ten years ago before I left the pack. I carried it, so I wouldn’t forget how he looked or how he smiled. I moved toward his body and took his hands, caressing it and looking down at him with nothing but an expressionless look in my eyes. He had the perfect brunette hair, the perfect body, the perfect eyes, but if only he hadn't ruined my life repeatedly. Everything about him was just what I desired, but I couldn’t have him. His death had nothing to do with this. It was something far greater than love or my past feelings for him rekindling.

I shook my head and clutched my grip around him. “Valor, I should have come earlier. I’m sorry you’d never get to know the truth, how much I love and hate you. I thought moving away from the pack would change everything, but I was wrong. It was stupidity to leave, and if I’d get another chance, even if it’s a sliver of a chance to do as I please with you. I promise to make you feel alive, then steal that life away from you, so you’d have nothing left.”

I knew I said that I was here to confess how I felt and my feelings were not from a place of love. And I’m willing to show Valor just how much, so I was hoping this witch’s intuition was a miracle.

As I let him go, I felt his finger move against my skin, earning an unanticipated gasp from me. If I was looking for a sign, then this was it. His heart drummed for a second. His fingers moved. Heat returned to his skin and he was no longer cold to the touch. I looked intently, hoping to catch another sign, but there wasn’t one. Nothing else happened.

If there was a chance that the moon goddess would give Valor a second chance at life, then I would ruin it all over again. I was here for revenge.