20. Abbot #3
“I’m so sorry.” He lets out a laugh and Abbot wonders if she can tell how strangled it is, how very far the sound is from normal.
“We’re so excited to look at this house, but life just keeps happening, and Liesl—you know Liesl, right?
She was not supposed to know about our happy news.
We had this whole thing planned, so if we could take one more minute to ourselves to sort things out? ”
“Of course,” Sandy says. “I’m in no rush. What an exciting time for your families! I know Bev is just so thrilled.”
“We’ll just—” Ned points toward the front of the house. His hand closes over Abbot’s arm, but Abbot hardly needs the encouragement to be tugged along.
In the foyer, Ned shoves both hands into his hair. “Fucking fuck fuck fuck. Liesl’s going to tell Peggy.”
“Oh,” Abbot says, and then he says it louder. “Oh. Yes. She will.”
“Fucking Chris.” Ned drags his palms down his face, digging his fingertips into his cheeks. “This could be worse. No, it can’t.”
“Peggy,” Abbot repeats. Liesl absolutely will tell her. It will be the first thing out of her mouth, and Peggy thinks Liesl walks on water, and what will they possibly say? No, they’re not engaged? There’s been a mistake? They can’t.
Abbot’s phone buzzes. Not chocolate cake so Baxter can have some, Liesl has written. He shoves it back into his pocket, pulls it out and puts it on do not disturb, and pushes it away once more.
Ned paces to the stairs and back to the door. “Engaged. Dammit.”
Engaged. Abbot turns the word over. It should have happiness associated with it.
Excitement. They ought to be delighted. If they were really engaged, they would be.
But this isn’t how it would go. There’d be a proposal and Abbot envisions himself down on one knee, Ned clapping his hand over his mouth.
Something inside his chest hurts, thinking of a scene that ought to have played out and they’ve somehow accidentally sidestepped.
“You don’t want Peggy to know,” Abbot says softly, watching Ned pace.
“It’s a lot.” Ned nods at the words, as if he particularly likes them. “It’s a lot, a lot. For her. Right? That’s not small news, and now the cat’s out of the bag, or it’s about to be.”
“It’ll be okay,” Abbot says.
“You keep saying that, but will it?” Ned grips his hair again, letting it stick up between his fingers.
“We’ll make sure it is.”
“How?”
How? Oh, Abbot has no idea. He can barely grasp what’s happening, stuck on the fact that others now think they’re engaged.
Which is…actually very exciting. It churns through him, building steam. The now of it all, the relief of not having to wait a couple years or five years or however long it would have taken them to get to this point. They’ll have to tell Peggy, and Dan and Cheryl both. Everyone.
Ned keeps staring at him, but Abbot still can’t find an answer.
“I don’t want anything to change between us,” Ned says softly.
“It won’t,” Abbot says quickly.
“Of course it will. This is so much, and it’s all happening at once, and—fuck, Abbot.”
“It doesn’t have to, is what I mean. You and I, we have a good relationship. As long as we’re in this together, the rest of it is just noise.”
“You’re so calm.”
“One of us ought to be. Ned, we’re good together. Better than good.”
“This will make everything different. I’ll have to tell Peggy. Oh fucking fuck.” Ned lets out a breathy laugh. “What the hell am I going to say? She’ll have so many questions.”
“You will. And soon,” Abbot says. “Tonight, before Liesl gets here.”
“Surprise, I’m suddenly engaged? Will she even understand that?”
“Of course she will.”
“She’ll want to know everything Liesl just asked.” Ned walks away again, only to spin on his heel and walk back.
“Tell her it’s a long engagement,” Abbot says. “That there’s no date set, and nothing really is changing. Like we said.”
“Everything is going to change,” Ned says. “But—okay. Yeah. We can just tell everyone we’re engaged, and not actually plan a wedding, so you and I can still figure out our own lives.”
It’ll take him seven to ten business days, Abbot hears Pat say and yes, Ned needs time, and Abbot can give him that. Time to adjust and come around, and sort through what this change means for them.
“Of course,” he agrees.
Ned nods, gaining momentum. “You can move down here, hopefully we’ll both be at Newbury, and hell, HR will be happy, won’t they?”
“Simple,” Abbot says, not because it is, but because he’s sure Ned needs to hear that.
“I’ll text Jen and see if I can go over there when Peggy’s out of school today. Though she’ll want me to take her overnight, if I do. Easier for Pegs, that way. And I think I should go alone. I’ll pick her up and—and yeah. Tell her, I guess.”
“And your parents?”
“Them too,” Ned says. “But Peggy first, in case…”
Abbot tries not to think of how he might finish that sentence. In case she’s upset. Angry. Horrified at the idea.
Because her accepting him as her father’s boyfriend is a lot different than welcoming a…
He can barely put words to it, even in the privacy of his mind. Stepfather?
It sounds impossible.
And wonderful.