Chapter 47
FORTY-SEVEN
GRACIE
Rage and resentment swirl within me as I stare at Noah.
The fucking audacity of the man to say that I am the one who has been lying about this shitshow of a relationship would be laughable if I wasn’t seething right now.
“You don’t mean that,” he whispers, and this time, I do laugh. I throw my head back, cackling to the ceiling as my body trembles with the need to free myself from this bed.
I cut myself off abruptly and turn my head back to him, finding him standing near the foot of the bed, a look of utter incredulity on his face, as though he has no idea how his words are so comical.
“I mean every word I say, Noah. You’ve done nothing but lie to me since the beginning.
You hid who you were, you pretended to fucking protect me when I was terrified, all the while making me fall for you.
I trusted you, and you threw that trust back in my face with every text, every time you snuck into my dorm, every time you freaking looked at me.
You broke me, and so I decided I wanted to break you, too.
Things may have changed since my initial reaction to finding out it was you behind the mask, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t hurt me by doing what you did.
Your actions aren’t excusable, and I’m honestly surprised you can look yourself in the mirror every day, knowing what you did and what you’ve continued to do since this all started. ”
His face hardens, his eyes darkening as he stares at me. “You knew it was me this entire time, didn’t you? Is that why you left the notes and sent the texts?”
I chuckle dryly. “Of course, I knew. You’re not nearly as deceptive as you seem to think you are.
Did you really think you guys could put cameras in the hall outside my dorm without me demanding access to them?
Did you really think this could go on for so long without me figuring it out?
What did you think would happen, Noah? Did you think that you would reveal yourself to me and I’d cry out in joy that it was you all along?
Did you think I would just accept it? You really are fucked in the head if you think I would have just let you get away with it. ”
“Was that your plan, then? Were you hoping your little games would make me confess? Or were you hoping I’d come clean to your brother, and he would deal with it for you?
Everything seemed to center around him, so was that what you wanted?
You wanted Cole to deal with the problem so that you didn’t have to, and instead of telling him yourself, you decided to have a little fun with me in the process, playing with my feelings for you. ”
I roll my eyes and scoff. “Again, with my freaking brother. Why is he all you and everyone else care about? If that was what I wanted, I would have told him myself. You know I told him that I was seeing someone. Why would I have done that if I was doing what you seem to think I was doing? Your logic makes no fucking sense.”
“I don’t know, Gracie,” he says, his voice eerily quiet as his body seems frozen. “I want to believe that isn’t what you wanted, but I have no idea who you are right now. I may have lied to you throughout, but that was only because I wanted you so much, whereas you did it to hurt me.”
“I did,” I admit. “But then my feelings changed, and it became more me trying to get you to tell me the truth yourself than anything else. I don’t want to hurt you, Noah, but you must see that you hurt me, and you deserved everything I did.
I was willing to forgive you if you came clean to me yourself, but you didn’t.
Not until you kidnapped me and promised to keep me here until I came around. ”
“You didn’t do it to hurt me? You want to be with me?”
I sigh, hating that this is what we’ve become, but unwilling to lie. “I want you to acknowledge how fucked up this all is, and how you’re in the wrong. That being said, I never told you that I don’t want you, Noah. I do, but a relationship between us won’t work if we can’t trust each other.”
His expression shutters, making him completely unrecognizable as he stares at me. Panic slices through me the longer he stays like that, and I know he's having an internal debate with himself.
Something washes over his face momentarily before it disappears in the same second, but I know what I saw.
Pain.
I have no idea what’s going on in his head right now, but I do know that no matter how much I want to hate him in this moment, no matter how angry or enraged I am, I don’t actually want to hurt him.
He seems to snap out of it, and I almost sigh in relief when he approaches me, but rather than releasing me from the bed like I hoped he would, he quickly covers me with a blanket instead before walking to the other side of the room.
I watch as he grabs his phone from the dresser, my eyes widening as he holds it up to take a picture of me, my mouth dropping open in surprise.
What the hell is he doing?
“See, the thing is, Gracie… I don’t believe you. I want to. Fuck, I really, really want to. But I’m going to need you to prove it to me.”
He starts backing towards the door and I call out his name.
He ignores me, not bothering to even look in my direction, his attention fixated on his phone.
“Noah! What are you going to do?” I shout, but he just backs into the hallway before looking up, his eyes locking with mine.
There’s something dark swirling behind his eyes, and I don’t think I’m going to like whatever it is he has planned.
“We need to talk about this,” I call out, but he grabs the door and slams it shut, leaving me tied to the bed and alone once more.