Chapter Two
ARCHIE
This was going to be a quick visit. I wasn’t even going to bother coming home, but it is my parent’s anniversary.
It isn’t something I can pass up. I’ve put off coming home since I left the military, always coming up with excuses.
The thought of just coming home and starting over here, it doesn’t feel like something I’m capable of.
I’ve seen and experienced things nobody will understand.
Everything has changed. It’s not like I have a girl to come home to either.
I tried that once—major fail. Not that I can blame my ex, I’d naturally compared her to the one that got away.
Maybe it was my curse, something I always did. Nobody would ever compare to her.
That ship sailed before I could ever admit my feelings to her, I missed my chance. I know it was for the best. I didn’t have anything to offer her at the time. She was always too good for me and my demons.
After the military, I considered joining the club, like several members of my family. It’s what everyone assumed I would do. That was the plan until everything happened. I couldn’t go back to the way things were. None of my plans worked out. I needed—craved—something different.
The MC is still waiting for me to patch in.
I could hear the hurt in my dad’s voice last month when we were on the phone when I told him I wasn’t joining.
For a while, I coasted. I wasn’t sure what I wanted to do with the rest of my life.
Thankfully, a few of the guys I served with reached out with an offer I couldn’t refuse.
They started a security agency. It was enough to help pass the time and give me something to do. I feel comfortable around them; we’ve been in the deep together.
Coming back here makes me feel a little adrift again. I have nothing to ground me. I plan to stay for one hour, two tops. Then I can say my goodbyes and tell them I have a job to get back to. I don’t want to lie, but I don’t want to stay too long.
The Grimaldis capture my attention first. Any chance for me to hear how she is doing. I know I shouldn’t care. Fuck, it’s not like I’ve seen or spoken to her since she got married. I like to torture myself. Like the fucking idiot I am.
The smile on Carol Grimaldi’s face as she looks past me makes me pause. I swallow back the nerves and turn around.
Would she be here? It’s been years since we’ve seen each other. Neither one of us coming home for long or at the same time.
I struggle to catch my breath as I turn. Is it who I think it is? Who I want it to be?
My eyes find hers—instantly. Heat floods through my body as I release the tension I’ve been holding onto.
It’s her. She’s really here.
My heart feels like it’s going to pound out of my chest at the sight of her. She’s just as beautiful as ever. Fuck, even more so.
I’m moving towards her without a thought, as if my feet can move on their own. It’s been too long, and it takes more effort not to run to her.
Our eyes stay locked as we move closer.
Tabitha’s hair is different. It isn’t dark brown like when we were younger.
She’s lightened it, but it looks perfect on her.
Her hair is pulled back in a claw clip, the same kind she loved to wear all the time in high school.
She even kept one clipped to the visor in my car.
A few strands of hair frame her heart-shaped face.
Her nose crinkles as we step closer. With every step, her smile grows right along with mine.
Few words are spoken, and then I can’t hold back any longer; I pull her in for a hug. Part of me thought she was a figment of my imagination. I have to touch her and know she’s really here. Then, I don’t want to let go. I can’t. It feels good to hold her after all this time. Even if she isn’t mine.
No, I lost the opportunity when I chose not to say something. It is probably my only regret in life. I should’ve made a move. I know my life would be different—better—if she were in it.
Fuck!
I should probably ask her how her husband is, but I don’t care.
“I didn’t know you were back in town.”
“I didn’t know you were either.” She smiles up at me. “It’s been too long since I’ve been back. I leave in the morning. What about you? How are you?”
“Same.” I laugh.
Tabitha is right; this feels awkward, but only because it’s been so long. Too long. She was once the girl who was always around. We were always together and knew everything about each other. Well—mostly.
“I’m alright.” I nod. “Finding ways to pass the time and figure out what I want to do now that I’m done.” My voice breaks off.
“Your dad said you were done, but didn’t want to join the club.” She chews on her bottom lip for a second, then lets it slip loose. “I’m kind of glad. I always worried you would get hurt somehow.”
She cares? “I mean, no more danger than the military.”
“It’s different, I guess.” She shakes her head. “I mean, I know some of what the club gets into.” She shakes her head. “I worried while you were enlisted too. Both of our moms kept me in the loop the whole time.”
It feels good knowing that, even after all this time, she cares like I do. We may not be as close, but knowing she thinks of me, it feels good.
“You look good.” I blurt out.
Her blue eyes widen, and a blush covers her cheeks. It spreads across her face and neck. “Thanks. So do you.” She shakes her head with a nervous laugh. “I missed you.” She admits and peers up at me through dark lashes.
We make our way over to a couple of lawn chairs near the edge of the yard. It’s not like we have all the time in the world to catch up, but I’ll take every second with her I can get.
It’s mostly small talk; she tells me about being a cosplayer. Tabitha was always a little bit of a nerd; it’s one of the things I loved about her. She was never afraid to be herself, even if it was different from the other kids at school.
I think I’m mostly surprised to hear she isn’t a mom. It was one of her biggest dreams growing up. Not that I feel right bringing it up. For all I know, they’re having trouble getting pregnant. It also doesn’t feel like my business.
I do my best to keep a smile on my face as we continue the small talk. It feels good to be here with her. Tabitha had been my best friend growing up, and it didn’t hit me until now just how much I missed her over the years.
Then other thoughts come to mind. Regret hits me instantly, a feeling I hate and am all too familiar with at the same time. It’s my fault. She’s not mine—she never was. It’s too late.
“I’m going to go and say a few more hellos. It was really good to see you, though.” I stand up from the chair.
“Yeah.” She nods. “You too.” Her smile slips slightly.
I shove my hand in my pocket and fidget with my keychain.
Is it weird that a keychain grounds me? Probably—but I’ve been doing it since I was a teen.
It’s simple and I don’t need to look at it to notice how it’s aged and frayed over the years.
The white ribbon now more cream colored.
The embroidered letters and heart can be felt as my thumb runs over the ribbon.
I need to walk away before I say something stupid. The idea of flirting with her and pushing her buttons would be too easy. I did it a few times when we were younger, but she never picked up on it. I shake my head and move to find someone else to talk to.