5. CHAPTER FIVE - BURNING SECRETS
I rushed out of my bathroom, hoping to see Lily’s beautiful self sprawled on my bed, but as I stepped into my bedroom, all I saw were my ruffled sheets and a subtle reminder of what had just happened between us.
Suddenly, it felt like my whole world came crashing down as I realized what I had just done. Oh fuck, Cole is going to absolutely murder me.
I knew I had a reputation as a playboy and couldn’t afford to expose myself as someone with actual feelings, but Lily made me feel different. I hadn’t spent much time with her, but for some reason, I felt like we both had a beautiful connection.
I quickly got dressed and rushed out of the house and into my car. I pulled out of the driveway, glancing at the window to catch Lily”s wave. Her smile lingered in my mind as I drove towards the fire department building, ready for another day of duty.
As I arrived at the fire station, Chief Ross called me into his office.
“You wanted to see me, Chief?” I asked, as I entered his office and shut the door behind me.
Inside, Chief Ross called me into his office. “Yes, I did, Jake. You didn’t show up for work yesterday and you”re late today. What”s going on?” he questioned, a stern expression on his face.
The memory of Lily, tangled sheets and tousled hair, flooded my mind, causing me to clench my eyes shut and shake my head in an attempt to dispel the distracting images.
“Sorry, Chief. I took my day off yesterday, and I had to help Lily with some complications,” I replied, trying to focus on the conversation.
Ross sighed, probably recalling that Lily was staying at my place. “How”s she doing? Other than the incident, I mean,” he inquired, concern evident in his tone.
“She”s okay,” I assured him. “Just a little shaken up, but she”s holding on.”
With a nod, Ross dismissed me, and I spent the day doing what I usually did when there wasn’t a huge fire emergency—responding to calls, conducting drills, and ensuring everything was in order. The day passed in a blur, and soon, it was time to clock out, handing over the reins to the night shift.
As I drove home, my anticipation grew with every mile. Thoughts of returning home to Lily slowly consumed my mind, igniting a fire of longing and desire within me. The pull was undeniable.
Arriving at the familiar sight of my house, I parked my car in the driveway and made my way up the stairs into the house. The aroma of a delicious meal hit me, erasing the day”s stress. Lily had prepared something incredible, and the enticing smell welcomed me home. The day”s chaos melted away, replaced by a strange but welcomed warmth.
I walked into the kitchen and found Lily there. “Hey, you”re home,” she smiled, and for a moment, everything else faded away.
The thought of grabbing her by the waist and pulling her in for a kiss filled my mind, but I couldn’t act on my impulses. It was one thing to think about these things but another to actually do them.
“Lily. I don’t think you should be stressing yourself so much,” I said to her, afraid that she was going out of her way just to thank me for saving her life.
“It’s just cooking, Jake. I think I can handle this much.” She smiled, carrying the plates into the dining room.
I stared in awe at the beautiful candle-lit setting of the dining room. I chuckled in disbelief, turning to her as she set down the covered plates.
“What’s all this?” I asked, pulling out a chair and taking my seat.
“This is our dinner.” She smiled, taking the covers off the dishes.
Layers of tender lasagna noodles were nestled between rich marinara sauce, creamy ricotta cheese, savory Italian sausage, and gooey melted mozzarella cheese. Garnished with fresh basil and grated Parmesan cheese, the lasagna filled the air with its irresistible aroma, promising a delicious and satisfying meal.
“Fuck, I could get used to this,” I chuckled, taking a seat at the table.
“It’s the least I could do,” Lily beamed, taking the seat opposite me. “I hope you like it.”
“Oh, I have a feeling I definitely will,” I said, grabbing my fork and digging into the lasagna Lily had made. I noticed her smile brighten as she also joined in.
As we settled into our seats, there was a gentle warmth in the air, like a soft embrace wrapping around us. The flickering candlelight danced across her face, casting shadows that seemed to illuminate the depth of her eyes.
I enjoyed the meal immensely, sometimes stealing glances at Lily until she finally caught me, and our eyes locked together. Lily”s gaze softened, her eyes searching mine with a gentle intensity.
“Jake,” she said, her voice soft but determined. “Tell me something deep about you. Something you”ve never shared with anyone else.”
Her words caught me off guard, and for a moment, I hesitated. I had built walls around my past, and they were sturdy, protecting me from the ghosts that lingered within. But Lily’s sincerity, the earnest curiosity in her eyes, somewhat melted away my reservations.
Taking a deep breath, I decided to open up to Lily about my past—a part of me I rarely shared with others.
“Well, Lily,” I began, ”my past... it hasn”t been an easy road,” I confessed, the memories of my tumultuous upbringing flooding back. “Growing up, I faced challenges that shaped me into the person I am today. But it wasn”t until I joined the fire department that I found a sense of purpose—a family, if you will.”
As I spoke, I could feel the weight of my past lifting off my shoulders, replaced by a sense of relief at finally sharing my truth with someone who seemed to matter to me.
Lily listened intently, her gaze never wavering as I bared my soul to her. “But sometimes, it feels like I”m still fighting the same battles, like I”m trapped in a cycle I can”t break free from.”
Lily reached across the table, her hand gently covering mine. “Jake, you’re definitely not trapped. Not anymore. And I know this may not mean much, but you don”t have to fight those battles alone anymore. I”m here for you.”
I smiled at her, genuinely glad that she was sitting across from me at that time. “Alright, your turn, Lily. What about you? What are your fears, your dreams?”
She took a moment, a contemplative look crossing her face before she began to speak. “Well, I”ve always been afraid of not living up to my own expectations. There”s this constant pressure to be successful, to meet the standards set by society and myself. But deep down, I just want to be happy, to find someone who understands me.”
“But wouldn’t that be putting your happiness in the hand of another person?”
“That’s just the thing. I don’t want just another person. I want someone who would love and adore me. Someone who understands where I’ve been and where I’m going. I want my own special person.”
Her honesty resonated with me, and I couldn’t help but nod as she spoke. “That’s beautiful Lily.”
“Thanks.” She sighed. A small smile tugged at the corners of her lips as she continued. “I”ve also always dreamed of traveling the world.” Her voice filled with a quiet longing. “Of experiencing new cultures, trying new foods, and making memories that will last a lifetime.”
“That sounds incredible, Lily,” I said. “Hopefully we can create our own memories.”
“I would like that.” Lily smiled, “I would like that very much.”
Our eyes never left each other, and I could feel a spark ignite and burn the longer I stared at her beautiful green eyes.
Fuck she’s amazing.I thought to myself. “But she is Cole”s sister.”
I felt something deep in the pit of my stomach and sighed at the impossibility of our relationship.
I groaned in frustration. “What the hell was I going to do now?”