6. Adam’s Road To Hope One Man’s Journey To Pussy Palace #2
“Sex?” Heat rushes to my ears and I shake my head.
“No sex. It’s a first date. I’m not even going to kiss her!
” I look to Jennie and Olivia. “Right? No kiss? Yeah, you don’t kiss on a first date.
” I sit back in my seat, relieved when Hank nods in agreement.
“Yeah, that’d be moving way too fast. No kiss.
” I sit forward. “Or wait. Does it send the wrong message if I don’t kiss her?
Will she think I don’t like her? And if I do kiss her, long or quick?
With or without tongue? Do I let my hands wander, or do I—” I look down at my clammy hands, wiping them on my shorts before throwing them in the air, giving a little wave “—keep my hands in the air where she can see them, so she knows there won’t be any funny business? ”
The basement is silent for a full ten seconds.
Hank clears his throat. “I’ve never wished I could see more in my life than I do right now.”
The girls break out in howling laughter, and even I crack a smile, forcing myself back to the couch.
“I’m just so nervous. I’m never like this before a date.”
“Well, maybe that means something,” Hank says.
“For this Rosie to take such a solid, confident guy like you and turn him into a rambling mess…maybe meeting her was fate. And I know you’ve lost some of that confidence when things ended with your last girlfriend, but maybe Rosie will help you get back there.
All the best people help us find ourselves when we’re feeling lost.”
I cock my head. “I get it now.”
“Get what?”
“Why they invited you to girls’ night. I don’t even need them, just you.”
“ Hey
!” Olivia gestures upstairs. “I brought the cute baby you love so much!”
Cara holds a tablet up. “Ollie also brought this.”
I frown. “A tablet?”
“Oh, you sweet fool,” she murmurs, tapping around on the screen. “ Basement Speakers
will connect me to your surround sound system, right?”
“Yes…”
“Great.” She sets the tablet down as my speakers ping, letting me know a device has been connected. Her smile is extra scary, and unease slithers down my spine.
“What are we—”
“ Chapter Twelve. Isabella. My back hits the wall in the dark hallway with a thud, and I gasp at the feel of Grant’s rock-hard erection pressing against my lower stomach.
He’s hot, heavy, and big—so damn big I whimper his name when he hikes my leg up, winding it around his waist, thrusting against me.
‘I like when you whimper my name, but you’re going to be screaming it by the time I’m through with you,’ Grant growls.
”
“What the fuck?” I cry out, flinging my arms wide. “What is this?”
“It’s an audiobook,” Cara says simply, checking her nails. “You read, Adam.”
“I read self-help books! Sometimes I read fantasy! I loved Harry Potter when I was a kid—sue me! I-I-I…I don’t read this!”
“You’re not judging Ollie and Hank’s taste in books, are you, Mr. Lockwood?”
Hank waggles his brows. “This was my pick for our book club read last week.”
“It was so good,” Olivia adds, breathless. She fans her face. “Grant is so
swoon-worthy.”
“Can confirm.” Jennie peels back the wrapper on a pack of Dunkaroos. “It was mine and Mom’s initiation into the club last week, and it did not
disappoint.” She swipes a tiny cookie through some frosting, then pops it in her mouth. “Think of it as research, Adam. You’re losing it over whether to kiss her, and this will help you figure it out. Those first few dates are all about reading each other’s cues and body language.”
“Sometimes you save that first kiss for date two or three,” Olivia adds.
“And sometimes you let the arrogant hockey captain who you swore you’d never touch take you upstairs and plow you right into the next year on his California king,” Cara counters, winking at Olivia.
“He told me Oprah owned the same mattress! How was I supposed to say no?”
“It’s pretty easy,” Jennie says. “ No
. See? Easy. Try it out with me, pip-squeak. No, Carter, I will not have sex with you.
”
Olivia jabs a finger at me. “This is supposed to be about Adam not knowing how to date, not me being weak and horny!”
“Hey!” I push her threatening finger away. “I was happy for you two when you kissed on New Year’s!” I throw my arms in the air when I realize the couple in the audiobook is naked. “Great, where did their clothes go?”
“They lost them when you all were bickering,” Hank replies.
Isabella and Grant become nothing more than searing kisses, punishing touches, tortured moans that barrel out of my sound system, ensuring the memory will forever be burned into my ears, and when she takes his “thick, throbbing length” in her hand, I drop my head and groan.
“Is this necessary? It’s like I’m listening to porn with my best friends’ wives. You guys are like my sisters. I feel—”
Olivia presses her hand to my mouth. “Shhh. It’s about to get good.”
“ He presses two fingers inside my soaking pussy and circles my clit slowly as his mouth moves over my neck.
”
“Jesus Christ. I can’t.” I jump to my feet and rake my fingers down my face. “I can’t do it. Somebody turn it off.” I point at Cara, who’s typing away on her phone. “What are you doing?”
“Just texting Emmett about something I want him to try tonight.”
“Cara—”
“ ‘Is this how you like to be fucked?’ he asks. ‘Slow and gentle?’ He thrusts his thick fingers harder, faster, and my knees buckle as I clutch his shoulders. ‘Or hard and rough, like this?’
”
“ Ah
!” A bloodcurdling shriek sounds from behind me. I look over my shoulder, finding my friends at the bottom of my stairs.
Carter claps his hands over Ireland’s ears, from where she’s clinging to Garrett. “ Cover your ears, princess
!”
“Take her, take her!” Garrett shouts, shoving Ireland into Carter’s arms.
Jaxon’s hands are glued to his cheeks. “What the fuck are you doing
, Adam?” he screams.
Emmett winks at Cara. “Got your text, babe.”
I stomp up the stairs as fast as my legs will take me. “I’m fucking out of here.”
* * *
By some miracle, I make it to Wednesday.
I make it through unnecessary toy recommendations from Jennie.
I make it through snippets of helpful scenes
from audiobooks sent by Olivia.
By the glory of God or whoever the fuck put me on this earth, I even make it through a shopping trip with Cara for a date-night outfit.
Now I just need to get through this date with my favorite five-year-old first.
“You’re doing it wrong,” the small voice beside me whispers.
“Shit,” I mutter as the tiny pink elastic I’m trying to loop around a hook snaps, ricocheting through the air. My gaze shifts to Lily, and I cringe. “I mean, crap. Poop. Pooh? Ahhh.” I rub a hand across my mouth. “Darn it.”
Lily snickers, taking the tiny loom needle from my hands. She hooks another bright elastic on the loom and starts effortlessly working it with the needle. “See? It’s like this.”
I look down at my hands. “My hands are too big. They’re ogre hands.”
She shakes her head, hiding her smile as she keeps working. “I don’t think so. Ogres are scary.” Big brown eyes lift to mine. “You’re not that scary.”
Four simple words shouldn’t make my heart beat a little faster, but they do. I’ve been volunteering at Second Chance Home for a few years now, spending time with the kids that walk through the door, in need of some extra love, the same way I was, way back when I was Lily’s age.
Lily arrived at the home four months ago.
She used to cry when she saw me, and as much as it broke my heart, I gave her the space she needed.
Being in the off-season and one of only two single friends in our group means I’ve been spending a lot of time here recently.
Maybe she got used to me being around, because a month ago, Lily sat down at the end of the couch I was sitting on and stared at the cover of the book she’d brought with her.
I asked her if I could read it to her, and she stared at me for a whole minute before slowly sliding closer, pushing the book between us. Wherever You Are My Love Will Find You,
by Nancy Tillman. Now we read it at every visit.
Progress is progress, no matter how slow.
I hope that’s how she feels about teaching me how to make Rainbow Loom bracelets, because this shit has been a two-week affair, and it’s not going well. I understand the process, I just can’t get my giant fingers to work on something so tiny.
Lily hands me back the needle and tucks her chestnut hair behind her ear. “Here. Now you try again, but go slow.”
“Slow. Got it.”
We work on our bracelets side by side without a word. I don’t mind the silence with her. Every quiet inch she’s given me has always been more than enough.
I look up as a door opens and a little boy comes tearing out of it, heading for the blocks on the floor. Emily, a good friend of Garrett and Jennie’s and their old neighbor, steps out of the room behind him. She shifts a pair of dark-framed glasses up her nose and smiles when she sees me.
“Is today the day Mr. Lockwood finally finishes his first Rainbow Loom?” She crouches down and nudges Lily. “About time, am I right?”
Lily giggles. “He’s still learning, but he’s doing great.” She sets her tools down and wraps her arms around Emily’s waist, squeezing. “Hi, Miss Emily. Are we gonna talk today?”
“We absolutely are, honey. I have time for you right now, but if you’re busy with Adam—”
“No!” She grabs a clasp and starts hooking it into the elastic. “I’m done!”
“Aw, man,” I whine. “Mine’s too short still.”
Lily leans over, examining the length of my bracelet. She looks down at hers and chews her lip. Then she hands me a clasp. “Do you remember how to finish it?”
“I think so.” I attach the tiny clasp the same way I’ve seen Lily do it a hundred times, then pull my tiny bracelet off the loom and frown. “It’s way too small.”
Lily takes the bracelet from me and slips it on her wrist, then gently takes my hand in hers and slips her bracelet on my wrist. “I’m a little faster, so mine is longer. We can swap. Now you can think of me when you wear my bracelet, and I’ll think of you too.”
Something thick catches in the back of my throat, and I struggle to swallow it down. “Thanks, Lil.”
“I’ll go wait in your room,” she tells Emily, then casts me a shy glance. “Bye, Adam.”
She runs across the room and disappears before I can say good-bye, and I climb to my feet, packing up the loom.
“You’re growing on her, huh?” Emily observes.
“She’s the sweetest kid ever.”
Emily smiles, but it’s sad and a little far off. As a child psychologist who works with the kids here, she knows a lot more about them and their lives than I do. I don’t want to be blind to the reason some of them are here, but I’m not sure I could stomach all of them either.
“She’s a very strong little lady.” She shakes the thought away and smiles. “Heard you have a date tonight. Jennie says you really like this girl.”
“I do. I think. I mean, so far. Yeah. I do.”
Her eyes gleam as they roam over me, as I shove my fingers through my hair and tug at my clothes. “My God, Jennie was right. You are a hot mess right now, aren’t you?”
I sigh. “I’m not proud of it.”
“Holy fucknuts.” She grips my hand as the front door opens and my coach strolls in. “Who’s that?”
“Davis.”
“Davis who? I’ve never seen him before.”
“He’s my coach. He visits with the kids here and there.”
“Mmm…” She traces her lower lip with her fingernail, eyes blazing. “Single?”
“Recently divorced.”
“Fuck yeah. Right up my alley.”
“His daughter is cute as hell too.”
“Daughter?” Her arms fall with her deflating sigh. “Ugh, gross. Kids.”
I arch a brow, gesturing at all the kids, the ones she works with for free
in her spare time.
“I get to give these ones back, Adam. I’m not interested in keeping one full time.”
The door to her office opens and Lily pokes her head out, eyes wide. “Emily? Are you still here?”
“Coming, honey!” She bumps my hip with hers. “Have fun on your date, Casanova. Don’t forget to bring flowers and dessert. Chicks love that shit.” She winks at me as she backs away, holding a hand up between the side of her face and the rest of the room. “They also love being
dessert.”
As if I’m taking any advice from Emily.
* * *
Okay, I’m taking a little
advice from her.
About the dessert. Bringing one, not making Rosie mine. One day, maybe, but— no
. No, Adam. Focus.
I tuck the freshly baked cookies and chocolate-covered strawberries into my picnic basket and set it by the front door, next to the bright bouquet of pink, orange, and yellow peonies I picked up earlier. I slip my shoes on, clip Bear’s leash on, and open the front door.
Then I slam it again.
Bear looks up at me, head cocked as if to say, “What the fuck, dude?”
I run to the bathroom, flick on the light, and stare at my reflection.
My curls have been tamed, my face freshly shaved, my teeth brushed threes time just in case, and my outfit is on point, thanks to Cara. I smooth my shirt down, pat my hair, and look to Bear.
“Whadda ya think, buddy? Handsome?”
His happy tail thuds against the wall.
“Right? So handsome. Everything’s gonna go great. I’m gonna tell Rosie what I do for a living, she’s gonna be totally nonchalant about the whole thing, we’re gonna have a great night, and maybe I’ll even hold her hand, and it’ll be perfect. Perfect night. Yeah.”
Still, I raise my phone, flash a shaky grin, and take a picture. Then I send it to the girls.
Me
Do I look okay?
Jennie
Handsome as ever, my dude. Go get it. *eggplant emoji* *water droplets emoji*
Olivia
*heart eyes* *happy tears emoji* You look perfect, Adam.
Cara
If my husband won’t put a baby in me, will you???
I pick up the basket and flowers, then take a deep breath.
“Wish me luck, Bear. Gonna go win over the pretty girl.”