Layla
Chapter Seventeen
The next morning, Patty arrived. Her first order of business was to take my temperature and then draw blood for testing.
The important thing was to keep my white blood cell count up.
Next was a steroid shot designed to help prevent nausea and stimulate my appetite.
Tomorrow, I would start taking the shots of G-CSF, which would boost the growth of healthy white blood cells.
I hadn’t slept much overnight. My body wouldn’t settle in order to rest. It appeared the metallic taste in my mouth was here to stay.
Although there was a bit of soreness, I was thankful I didn’t have any blisters.
Yet. That was the hardest part. Waiting to see what would happen.
I felt like a hypochondriac looking in the mirror every hour to see if I had anything new happening.
I was gentle with my hair, thankful I’d had Patty help me blow it out on Sunday.
That allowed me to gently brush it and wear it back this week in a low ponytail.
I didn’t want to yank on it in any way that would speed up hair loss.
Since I knew I had to eat breakfast to keep my strength up, I settled on Rice Krispies. It might taste like cardboard, but it was easy to get down.
“I sure like Kellan. He seems to care about you a great deal,” Patty commented while giving me the paracetamol which would help ease the aches and pains.
“He is. I don’t know how it’s possible to have known someone for such a small amount of time yet have him become such an important part of my life.
” The thought, now spoken out loud, gave way to a shiver of fear.
Fear over becoming too reliant on him for my happiness, only to drive him away with neediness. Baby steps, I reminded myself.
“I’m a hopeless romantic. It’s nice to see the way he looks at you.”
I swallowed down the liquid medicine, wincing at the taste. “He asked me to go to a wedding with him in a couple of weeks. You think I’ll feel up to it?”
“You very well could. After the next few days, while we see how your body reacts and recovers, we’ll know better.”
“I just hope my hair cooperates with me.”
My words caused her to frown. “Don’t get your hopes up, honey. Hair loss is a universal side effect of chemo. Could happen in the first round, could wait till the second, but the chances of keeping your hair are slim. But we’ll get you some wigs. How do your joints feel?”
“They’re stiff, but okay.”
“Good. Let’s get out and take a short walk. The fresh air will do you some good, both physically and mentally. I promise.”
A short walk later, and I was tired, but Patty had been right. The fresh air and muscle movement had felt good. After she left, I texted my family and settled in for my first Spanish lesson via Rosetta Stone. With this much time on my hands, it would be foolish to squander it.
Unfortunately, three hours later, the flu-like symptoms hit me.
I became shivery and shaky. My bones and gums started to ache as if I had a heartbeat in them.
When Patty arrived later in the afternoon, she encouraged me to keep eating—I stuck to cereal and Gatorade along with a few crackers.
She reassured me about my white blood cell count.
Despite my shivering, my temperature was okay, too.
No fever, which was important. I spent the rest of the day in bed.
Around eight thirty that evening, Kellan sent a text indicating he was on his way over. I knew arguing with him was useless. He was stubborn in the most wonderful way. This evening he was as sweet as ever, arriving with chicken noodle soup and fresh bread from a local restaurant he’d Yelped.
“How you feeling?” he asked as we sat at the table.
“Not great,” I responded, sipping my soup. I wished it didn’t taste as bland as all the other food I’d eaten that day. “Sorry. I won’t be very fun to be around—probably for the rest of the week.”
He smiled. “It’s okay. I promise you’re better company than my empty house.”
At least there was that.
“Hey, I was thinking about last night. About mentioning the wedding. I didn’t mean to put any pressure on you. You certainly don’t have to go with me.”
Funny how I’d been anxious in thinking about attending, but now I felt disappointed that he might be changing his mind.
“You don’t want me to go?” My voice was as small as my confidence level, and I hated it. Hated being emotional about every single thing these days. I was a spool of emotional ribbon, unraveling one inch, one day, at a time.
“No, no. Of course I do.” He blew out a breath, seemingly searching for the right words.
“I’d be absolutely thrilled to have you go with me.
I didn’t want to be presumptuous about how you’ll be feeling.
Or take any risks of you being exposed to anything while your immune system is taking a beating.
But I’ll certainly take my cues from you. How does that sound?”
Reasonable. It sounded more than reasonable. I needed to repeat the R word to myself until it stuck. “Sounds good. Sorry. I’m being oversensitive. Maybe I’m going stir-crazy in this place.” One more reason to welcome a weekend away.
Over the last few days, I’d gotten tired of staring at the same sterile, rented walls.
Although my job in LA had been demanding, I had enjoyed being active and social every day.
The Spanish lessons and learning how to knit from Patty’s friend might be welcome distractions, but they didn’t make up for being stuck in this place.
“It’s understandable. How about spending this next weekend at my place? I’ll be putting in the floors and countertops on the second level, but at least it’ll be a change of scenery. We can go for walks around the lake.”
I hesitated for a moment, thinking about the amount of time we’d already spent together this week. But the idea of getting out of my apartment for a couple of days was too tempting to pass up. “Are you sure I won’t be in the way?”
He touched my face. “Never. As long as you don’t mind some noise. I have one of my guys coming over to help. We’ll get the floors knocked out on Saturday. That’ll only take a few hours. Countertops are being delivered, and I’ll install them on Sunday.”
Anything sounded better than spending another minute here.
“I’d love to come over.”