Chapter Fifteen
Gemma
O ne day bled into another and by the fifth morning I realized I was beginning to get used to my routine that threatened to become a comfortable pattern. I was creating some amazing landscapes while I lived in a bubble with Evander, with no outside influence or intrusion.
Rembrandt most certainly adored his newfound freedom. He spent his days batting his paws at the many bugs hidden in the grass outside and jumping high into the air to capture the plentiful butterflies fluttering past on their brightly colored, elegant wings.
It was ironic that while my freedom had been taken away, Rembrandt had gained his.
Perhaps I’d feel more certain of my place here if Evander demanded more from me. Instead I was living on a knife-edge waiting for him to claim my body completely after our one-off intimate act in the shower.
And wasn’t that the biggest irony of all?
The fact he disappeared at nighttime in his sanctuary, a room that was strictly off-limits to me, then didn’t reappear for at least a handful of hours meant there was very little to worry about in that regard other than my raging, dissatisfied hormones.
I blew out an aggrieved breath and put down my brush with cadmium yellow paint glistening on its bristles. I might hate everything Evander stood for with his role in the mafia, but it didn’t stop my body craving his.
I was an emotional wreck, an outwardly normal woman living with rampant hormones and a terrible yearning I couldn’t quell.
Sudden cramping pain hit my midsection and I sucked in an unsteady breath as I pressed an outspread hand to my stomach. I squeezed my eyes closed. Shit . I hadn’t given a thought to my imminent period. I’d been too busy focusing on other problems.
Like the push-pull of emotions that threatened to tear me completely apart thanks to being in Evander’s world once again. It certainly felt like I was being pulled apart, but then I’d never had an easy time with menstrual pain.
“Gemma, are you all right?”
I shook my head at Evander’s query from behind me. Though he’d placed my easel in different angles and positions to give me totally different visuals for my landscapes, he always sat in his usual place behind me.
If he thought staying out of sight left me undisturbed, he could think again! It took me at least half-an-hour to forget he was there and fall into the world I created. Even then a distant part of me was always aware of him.
I turned around, grimacing at the sticky wetness that was already soaking through my panties and probably my denim shorts. “Please tell me you brought what I’d need for my monthly cycle?”
His eyes widened. “You don’t have your implant anymore?”
“No, I—“
I pushed down the tremors threatening to wrack through my body. “I had it taken out not long after I—“
“Ran away,” he interjected harshly. “A pity. You were one of those lucky women who never got a period while you were on it.”
Yeah, so lucky.
I managed a nod. “Well my period is back now with a vengeance.”
He pushed to his feet. “I’ll drive to the shops. We could do with some more groceries anyway while I’m there.”
I exhaled softly. What had I thought? That he’d humiliate me and make me suffer by keeping me in bloodied clothes?
I lifted my chin, determined not to keep searching for his good side. My voice was scathing. “I’ll be here. It’s not like I can go anywhere.”
His eyes narrowed, but he chose to ignore my disrespect, though I knew the mafia valued respect even above their wealth.
“I’ll fold some towels on the bed for you to lie on while I’m gone.”
I gaped, my heart beating furiously. “You’re seriously not going to cuff me to the bed while I’m,” I waved a hand down low, “like this ?”
He cocked a dark brow, his jaw set. “If you think I’d risk leaving you loose, you’re sadly mistaken.”
My throat convulsed. “What happens if you don’t come back? Would you leave me chained to the bed so that I’d slowly die of thirst and starvation?”
He shook his head. “So dramatic, la mia Gemma.” He took a step forward, closing the distance between us. Then clasping my chin he said, “I won’t let anything bad happen to you, not while you’re here with me.”
I held his dark stare. “That’s just it though, you won’t be here.”
His eyes narrowed, then turned speculative. He sighed heavily, as though disbelieving of his decision to give in. “If I did leave you free, will you give me your word you won’t go anywhere.”
I didn’t flinch, didn’t react at all. “I promise.”
His stare glittered as he considered me. “If you break your promise,” he said in a low, menacing tone, “I can promise that you will live to regret your lie.”
I scowled. “I’m. Not. Going. Anywhere.” I jerked my head from his grasp, then brushed an imaginary piece of lint off my blue T-shirt. “There is no need to threaten or blackmail me. I’m not your enemy.”
He narrowed his gleaming eyes that appeared far too judgmental for my liking, then nodded toward his cabin. “After you, then. I’m sure you’ll find something to make do with while I’m gone.”
“I’m sure I will,” I conceded, falling into step beside him. I glanced up at him as we stepped through the doorway. Awareness shivered through me. Even in his casual pleated gray pants and a cream polo shirt he was deliciously handsome, the epitome of masculinity. “Please don’t be too long.”
He smirked down at me. “Oh? Are you going to miss me?”
“No,” I spluttered indignantly. “My period can get heavy.”
“Then I’ll be as fast and efficient as possible.”
I headed to his pantry and riffled through it to find an unopened packet of napkins—they would have to do—while he retrieved his car keys from somewhere in the bedroom.
I hurried to the bathroom, not even glancing back to see if he’d gone. I needed to get under the shower and feel clean again. I was undressed and under the hot, streaming spray when the bathroom door opened and Evander stepped inside.
He leaned against the closed door as he regarded me. “Don’t I even get a goodbye?”
I looked over my shoulder at him, trying not to give into a cascade of tremors thanks to his heated eyes drinking me in. It was as if he was memorizing my every curve and line, my perfection along with my defects. I tossed a hunk of wet hair over my shoulder. “ Addio .”
His eyes flared, my Italian clearly inciting a primal reaction from him. He drew off his shoes and socks then pulled off his polo shirt. “It’s not Addio just yet,” he rasped.
I stared at the flex of his abs and his shoulders, at the trail of dark hair that disappeared beneath the waistband of his pants. Then he unzipped them and pulled them down his thighs, giving me an eyeful of his hardening cock.
I swallowed heavily. Of course he was commando. It...expedited things for him. That he’d withheld his base nature when I recalled just how exactly carnal he’d been in the past made me want to rejoice even as I wished I had the willpower to reject him and the pleasure he was about to extract from me.
Then he pushed open the glass door and joined me in the too-small shower, his powerful presence sucking all the oxygen out of my lungs. And yet I was panting when he stepped closer to me from behind, his cock pressing against the small of my back as he pushed my hair aside and kissed my neck.
I gasped at the hot tingles charging through my body. He cupped my breasts, holding their weight in his hands even as he plucked my nipples between his fingers and thumbs until I was dizzy with need.
Then he lifted his head just a little and murmured into my ear, “How badly have you wanted this...wanted me?”
Denial flooded through me and I stepped away from him and almost into the tiled wall when I grated recklessly, “I left you, remember? If you take me now it will be by force.”
His breath hissed out. Then he put an arm around my waist and jerked me back against him. “Your refusal to admit how you really feel is pathetic when your body tells me exactly what you want.” He dropped one arm from my waist and touched between my thighs, opening my outer folds like I was some exotic flower then massaging the bud inside.
I moaned, almost collapsing from the sheer pleasure he induced. It was only his arm locked around me that kept me upright.
His cock jerked against me, his voice rough and husky. “Your body doesn’t lie to me, la mia Gemma. But I won’t take you. Not until you ask.”
I wanted to howl rejection, wanted to sob refusal. If only my body didn’t burn for his possession, for his ownership one more time.
“I-I want you,” I gritted out.
His whole body tensed behind me, the very atmosphere hanging heavy with anticipation. “Say it like you mean it,” he growled.
Did the bastard want me to beg?
My whole body tingled with need. My breath shuddered out.
So be it.
“I want you,” I said hoarsely. “I want your cock deep inside me. I want your hands and your mouth all over me. I want to pretend we’re happy in this moment in time. I-I think I might even want to pretend we’re together again.”
“Pretend?” he repeated. Then his breath hissed out and he clasped the base of his cock and aligned it to my core. “Baby, we’re not here to play pretend.”
In one incredible thrust he filled me completely, utterly. I whimpered at his size, my inner muscles stretched to capacity. But then he wasn’t to know I hadn’t been with anyone since I’d left him.
No had come close to measuring up.
Literally.
Then he pulled back ever so slightly before he plunged back inside.
My breath wheezed out. I was caught somewhere between pleasure and pain.
With a low, throaty growl, he stroked in and out, creating a perfect tempo that made me forget all about pain as pleasure became the center of my universe.
He planted hot kisses all over my neck, sucking on my sensitive flesh while he pummeled me with his masterful cock.
Holy mother. I was seconds away from falling off the edge into an abyss of pleasure. Or maybe I’d skyrocket into space and experience nirvana. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d sent me to both of those places. It was just the first time in a long time I’d been there and the journey was as incredible as the—
I fell before I was flung high, my cry of ecstasy a piercing, unearthly sound that echoed in the small confines of the shower before it was joined by Evander’s guttural groan as he followed right behind me, his hot seed pulsing inside me.
Pleasure coursed through me, undiluted and bright, colors exploding behind my eyelids as I shut my eyes and allowed my senses to ride out the bliss that superseded anything else I could possibly imagine.
There wasn’t anything half-as-thrilling as having sex with Evander.
Then he pulled out and turned me around. Cupping my chin, he lifted my head and kissed me under the hot spray like he wanted to possess me in an entirely different way. Not with his body, but with his heart, his soul.
That I wanted that exact same thing was the only reason I pulled away.
It didn’t matter what I wanted...what either of us wanted, I’d left him the first time for a reason.
I didn’t dare risk having a relationship with him again.