Unshaken

Chapter 15

15

Even though she’d told Carter that she would head down to Crittenden County soon, Bev wondered if she’d spoken too quickly. “Soon” was going to have to be later instead of sooner. As much as she believed that she should help her brother with Stephanie, Bev was just as committed to her foster kids, and it was going to take some time to rearrange her schedule so she could take a few personal days.

Bev felt bad about the delay, but it couldn’t be helped.

Though Stephanie was no doubt scared and in danger, she was also a grown woman. In addition, she had Hardy looking after her, which meant a lot. Hardy could not only handle just about anything that came up, he was also a born caretaker. Even if he and Stephanie didn’t get along or never exchanged more than a few words at a time, Hardy would still look out for her and keep her safe.

Beverly couldn’t say the same thing about all of the children in her caseload.

The simple truth of the matter was that not all foster homes were ideal and not all foster kids were easy to care for. It wasn’t their fault. Most of them had been through some terrible ordeals.

But they did have one constant in their lives, and that was her. She found it harder and harder to leave them for any length of time.

Especially Justin Emmerson, who was causing trouble again.

Sitting on one of the swings in his foster family’s backyard, Bev contemplated the number of ways she could bring up his latest outburst without him completely shutting down. It was surprising that even after ten years of working with children in the system, she still wasn’t always sure of the best way to help.

Looking at Justin out of the corner of her eye, she reflected that it was probably not all that surprising after all. The twelve-year-old had been through a lot in his short life, and his experiences were like no one else’s. There was no way she’d ever push him to conform completely. No matter how hard he—or anyone caring for him—tried, he wasn’t ever going to act like an “average” kid.

As she thought about all of those things, Bev continued to let the silence surround them. Justin had enjoyed far too few moments of peace in his life.

But maybe this wasn’t the best way to handle things today. He was looking increasingly agitated.

“Are you ever going to say something, Ms. Anderson?”

Hmm. Usually, he insisted on calling her Bev. She smiled at him. “Yes.”

He kicked the patch of dirt under his feet. “Well, then?”

“I’ve been trying to think of the best way to get started.”

He almost flinched. But he covered up the movement with lightning speed. “To do what? Tell me that I’m about to get kicked out of here?” His voice was filled with bitterness.

And, yes, more than a little bit of pain.

Boy, that made her heart hurt. If she wasn’t his social worker and wasn’t so worried about losing their fragile connection, she would have hurried to his side and given him a hug.

But Justin had issues with being touched.

So, she did the next best thing. She crouched in front of him, so they were not only eye to eye but he was even a little bit taller than her.

It was all positioning, she guessed, but he needed that. There were too many people in Justin’s life who had power over him. His awful parents. The string of mediocre foster families. The teachers who cared but didn’t have the skills or the time to truly be there for him.

And now, the gang members who were beginning to reach out to him. They were telling him the things he wanted to hear—but they scared him too.

The Broken Arrows were what had brought her to the house.

“Justin, you are not about to be kicked out of here.”

“Yeah, right.”

“I’m serious. The Hendersons like you. They like having you here.”

The boy didn’t say a word, but something new entered his expression. He shut it down before she could decipher it.

So she continued. “I’m telling you the truth. You know I wouldn’t lie about that.”

“What are you here for, then?”

“I think we should talk about yesterday. About what happened at school.”

His posture slumped. “I already talked to the principal.”

“I know.”

“How come you know? Did he call you?”

“Yep. And so did the Hendersons.”

His expression practically burned with hurt. “And what did all of you decide I should do?”

“Believe it or not, we talked a lot about what we could do. The principal and I agreed that we need to help you figure out ways to deal with those boys.” Mr. Cousins, the principal, had confirmed what she’d guessed—that a couple of those boys were hanging around some of the gang members and no doubt trying to gain their respect.

Justin stared at her with those amazing pale green eyes of his. Eyes that girls were going to get lost in. Eyes that one day someone special was going to fall in love with.

If he lived that long.

As the moment continued, Justin looked as if he wanted to memorize every feature on Bev’s face. Then he surged to his feet.

“Yeah, that will solve everything, won’t it? I do what you say, and those boys will forget about me,” he said sarcastically. “Who knows? Maybe they’ll all stop bullying me at school.”

Bev noticed that his breath had quickened. She stood up and stepped backward in order to give him some space. “I don’t expect that to happen.”

“But you do. But you have no ...” He paused, obviously catching himself before he started cussing up a storm. “Idea.”

“Then tell me.”

“No.”

She almost smiled. “Sorry, but that’s not an acceptable answer.”

“I don’t think I should have to talk about it.”

This boy. This poor, damaged, vulnerable boy. Instead of pushing some more, she changed tactics. “How about I talk for a while, and you listen?”

He rolled his eyes and stuffed his hands in his jeans’ pockets.

But he didn’t move.

“Justin, I know why the gang is targeting you. One way or another, they’re going to want you to join them.”

“I don’t see why.”

“I do. You’re big for your age. You’re confident. You look like you don’t have a lot of fear.” She paused, then added, “You are also essentially alone in life.”

“Just say it. I’m a foster kid.”

“All right. You’re a foster kid.”

His jaw clenched. Yep, she’d hit a nerve. She felt that pinch. Regretted it. But continued, because he was her responsibility and she needed to make sure that he was prepared for whatever obstacles he faced in the upcoming years.

“So, you’re all those things, but that’s not all you are.” Stepping closer, she said, “You are confident, but I know that you aren’t always that way. And I know you put on a good act, because I also know that you aren’t always fearless. That sometimes you’re scared.”

His jaw worked. “That’s not true. I’m not a wimp.”

“I didn’t say that. I don’t think you are. I think you’re one of the bravest people I’ve ever met. Which is yet another reason I think you’re being targeted. These guys want you. They want you around for a while. I think they’re going to want to train you to work for them. They think you’re so alone in the world that they will be your new family. But they’re wrong.”

“You aren’t around all the time, Bev. You’re hardly around at all.”

He wasn’t lying. He wasn’t even exaggerating. But what could she do? The child wasn’t her only concern. “I know.”

Disappointment flashed in his eyes again. “So, whatev. We’re done.”

She shook her head. “Justin, I wish I was able to visit you more often. I wish you were the only kid I know who’s in foster care. But you and I know that’s not true.” She drew a breath. “Now, the way I see it, you have some choices. You can ignore everyone’s warnings, join the Arrows, and then see what happens.”

“Or they can make my life miserable.”

“Or ... I could move you.”

“No. No way.” He looked away. “I know I’m not going to get to stay too much longer, but things are pretty good here. The Hendersons are nice.”

“I agree. They want you to stay too.”

“So, you only came over to tell me what?”

“That you’re going to have to turn the other cheek and try to wait them out. Because these guys are trouble, Justin. One of their new recruits—a former foster kid I worked with—just found out how much trouble they are.”

“What happened?”

Bev shook her head slightly. “All you need to know is that it’s bad, and it will get worse.” Leaning closer, she lowered her voice. “Listen to me, Justin. These Arrows, they’re not just older teenagers who are surviving. They’re actively hurting innocent people.”

Justin studied her face, obviously looking for signs that she was giving him some kind of social worker nonsense.

“Are you telling me the truth?”

“I wouldn’t lie about that. Please. Hang in there a little bit longer.”

“But the principal—he gave me a warning.”

“I know. But he also knows what you’re dealing with. So do the Hendersons. So do I. You might think that you’re alone, but you’re not.” She squeezed his hand before quickly letting go. “You’re not.”

He blinked, showing that her words affected him more than he wanted to admit. “I’ve got to go.”

“All right. I’ll see you in two weeks.”

He’d already turned around but looked back to meet her eyes. “So soon?”

“It’s our regularly scheduled visit, right?”

For a split second, pure relief shone in his eyes before he hid it again.

But that was enough. The two of them still had a relationship. He’d probably never know it, but she was as relieved as he was. “I’m going to text you, so don’t blow me off.”

“Yeah, all right.”

“Justin, I mean it. Tell me you’re going to text me back.”

“I’ll text you back, Bev.”

She grinned at him. “Don’t tell anyone, but I’ve gotten used to you calling me Bev.” When he almost smiled, her heart filled. “You have a good day, now.”

He waved a hand but continued to walk away.

As she watched, a little bit of her heart went with him.

After saying goodbye to Jean Henderson, Bev got back into her car and finally checked her phone.

And saw that Carter had called.

Before she could talk herself out of it, she called him back as she pulled out of the driveway. He answered on the first ring.

“This is a nice surprise.”

“Why? You’re the one who called me.”

“That’s true, but I also texted you last night and ... crickets.”

Put that way, she felt embarrassed. “Sorry about that.”

“You’re busy. I get it.”

“Well, we’re talking now. How are you?”

“I’ve been better. Not only do I have an injured Amish girl hiding out on my ranch, but a friend of mine might be in danger as well.”

“Who are you talking about?” Was he worried about Hardy?

“Who do you think, Beverly? You, of course.”

His voice was gentle, almost teasing. She couldn’t get a read on it, which made her nervous. “There’s no need to be worried about me. I’m fine.”

“Not from my point of view. Hardy told me that you were seen helping that girl, Beverly. In my book, that also puts you in danger. You need protection.”

“I’m used to taking care of myself. And listen, I haven’t been doing anything stupid. I’ve been watching my surroundings and being careful.”

“I’m sure you have been, but this isn’t an angry parent or domestic dispute you’re in the middle of. We’re talking about a gang here.” His voice deepened. “I know you said you’d come in a couple of days, but I don’t want you to put it off any longer. I want you to come to the ranch with me. I’m going back in a couple of days.”

Hope rose inside her before she tamped it down. Yes, they’d talked several times in the past, and he’d always acted warm and friendly. More than once over the years, she’d misread a smile or a teasing comment directed her way. She’d think it meant something, only to realize that he said sweet things to women all the time. He was a charmer. That was his way.

Firmly reminding herself of that, she murmured, “I guess I could. Thanks to Hardy, we have known each other awhile.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about.” After a pause, he added, “I’d like to see you soon.”

She was glad she was at a red light because she was caught off guard. “Excuse me?”

“I’m asking you out on a date, Beverly. And before you shut me down, let me clarify. My preference would be to pick you up at your house, take you to dinner someplace nice. But if you want me to meet you at some coffee place, I’ll do that.”

He sounded so grumpy about the idea, she had to giggle.

“Bev, don’t break my heart and start laughing at me.”

“I was only giggling at your tone of voice. You sounded so grumpy about meeting at a coffee shop.”

“So ... does this mean you’ll let me take you out?”

It had been so long since anyone had treated her like she was worth a fancy night out. But it was still tempting to say no.

But what if she did say no? Would she regret it later? Yes. Yes, she would.

“Yes, Carter.”

“That makes me very happy. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” she teased.

“I’m not going to let you change your mind.”

“I’m not planning on it.”

“I’ve gotta get off this phone, but I’ll call you tonight with the details.”

“That sounds good.”

After Carter disconnected, Bev pulled forward through the light and allowed a little shiver of desire to filter through her.

And then she smiled.