Chapter 30
THIRTY
The morning after our apple-picking date, I sipped my coffee, staring out across the field at Adam’s cabin. Emilia happily played with her dolls on the living room floor next to me, and I had a chance to breathe before starting my day. I usually loved mornings like this. However, today, I couldn’t help the sigh that escaped my lips.
Yesterday was one of the best days of my life. I couldn’t remember the last time I laughed that much or the last time I felt like there could be more to my life than just being a mom. And even though Emilia was an equal part of our day, Adam found small moments to connect with me and make sure I knew he was thinking about me just as much as I was him.
But then, it all came crashing down when Cole showed up. I hated that I resented his presence, even for a few moments, but he’d definitely put a damper on my plans for the night. I couldn’t even blame Adam for leaving; it was the right call. Even after a full day of brewing tension between us, Cole would have asked questions if Adam had hung around .
I groaned, squeezing my brow between my fingers. While I was still nervous about what Cole would say if he found out I was dating Adam, this secret was beginning to get to me. I hated having to think about every action, to fear that someone would pick up on the mounting tension between us. Deciding to keep it from my daughter was one thing; she shouldn’t have to worry about her parents’ dating lives until it became serious. But I wanted to be able to hold Adam’s hand in public and not be afraid that it would get back to my brother.
Through the window, I glanced across the field, finding Adam’s cabin. At this hour, he was probably sleeping. It was tempting to cross the lawn and go to him, to throw myself into his arms, but that would have to wait until we eventually got a moment alone.
“Mommy?” Emilia’s voice called out. “Can you come play with me?”
“Of course, baby.” I smiled, leaving my coffee on the table next to her. She passed one of her dolls to me before resuming brushing the other’s hair. “So…” I said, trying to appear more casual than I felt. “What did you think about our day with Adam yesterday?”
“It was awesome!” she squealed, smiling back up at me. It struck me then how much her face had changed in the last few months. She’d lost the roundness in her cheeks, and there were two gaps where her little bottom baby teeth used to reside. She was growing up in front of my eyes, and soon enough, she’d be too cool for moments like this with her mother. I pulled her into a side hug, dropping a kiss to the top of her head. She squirmed under my hold. “Mommy! You’re squeezing me.”
“I’m sorry,” I chuckled. “I’m just happy you had fun yesterday. I think Adam really liked hanging out with us. ”
“Do you think he’ll come over again?”
“Adam?” She nodded. “I’m sure he will. Would you like that?”
“Yup,” she said, standing up to survey all her toys. “He’s funny, and you smile a lot when he’s here.”
My brow furrowed as I looked at her. “What do you mean?”
She let out a dramatic sigh, placing her hands on her hips. “Like this,” she grumbled, giving me the biggest smile she could form.
I couldn’t help but laugh. God, this girl might be the death of me in her teenage years, but hopefully, she’d use her powers for good later in life. “You think he makes me happy?”
She shrugged. “I think so. And he looks at you a lot. Like you’re the prettiest girl in the whole world.”
My face flustered at her words, both hating and loving that she’d picked up on his looks. As much as I tried to keep this burgeoning thing between us, it was hard to contain my joy when I was in Adam’s presence. And the fact that he looked at me like I was someone important to him? That meant more than I could even put into words.
A knock came on the door, and I called out for them to come in without worrying who it was. We’d had a pretty steady stream of visitors since our arrival. Secretly, I was hoping it’d be Adam, but he was always good about texting me first thing in the morning to see how I slept. Since I hadn’t received a text yet, I had to assume he was still sleeping.
“Hey,” Cole called out, holding up bags from the bakery in town. The smell of cinnamon and sugar made my mouth instantly water. “Stopped by Poppy’s to grab a couple of things, and she said these were your favorites. Hope you don’t mind the early morning visit.”
“Only if you don’t have an almond bear claw in there.”
He tugged out one of the pastries, holding it out for me. “C’mon, Tor, you think I have a death wish?”
I hurried over to the kitchen, grabbing a couple of plates before sneaking a peek into his bag. Emilia tugged on the hem of my sweater, hoping for a special treat of her own. Cole must have done something to get on Poppy’s good side, because there were almost a dozen sugar cookies in the shape of a cat, dusted with purple edible sand on the bottom.
Her eyes widened into the size of saucers. “Are those for me?”
“You bet, Ems,” Cole chuckled, pulling her into a hug. “You think I’d stop by here without something special for my favorite girl?”
She looped her little arms around his neck, hugging him so tightly, his face turned a little red. But he didn’t let go until she dropped her hands, squirming for him to put her down.
“Only one!” I called out, sure the parenting police were going to come for me if I gave her too many cookies for breakfast. “We can save the rest for later.”
“Okay, Mommy,” she huffed, rushing back to play with her dolls.
As she played on the floor of the living room, Cole leaned forward onto the counter. “She seems to be doing really well here.”
“She’s a trooper,” I sighed. “She misses Cam, but she’s also used to these long stretches. He facetimes her from the locker room every night, telling her she’s his good luck charm. ”
“I like that,” Cole said. “He seems like a good guy.” He sipped his coffee, looking down at the lid as he asked his next question. “No chance of that becoming something again?”
I almost choked on my coffee. Even if there were lingering feelings between Cam and me, they would have been squashed the first moment I kissed Adam. He had bulldozed his way into my heart, not leaving room for any other man to lay claim to it. But since I’d stupidly decided to keep that from my brother, I couldn’t tell him.
“Nope,” I answered. “We’re good as friends and co-parents. It wasn’t some drawn-out or dramatic break-up. We both knew it wasn’t working and decided to end it before things got worse. Sure, it hurt like hell at first, but it’s what was right for us.” I stared out at my daughter. “And it was right for her. I’ll always love him for giving me the greatest gift, but I haven’t been in love with him for a long time.”
He smirked as he stared at me. I scrunched my nose, feeling awkward under his watchful eye. “What? Do I have crumbs on my face?”
“Nah, nothing like that,” Cole answered. “I was just thinking how fucking proud I am of you, Tori. I haven’t told you that enough, but I am.”
I cleared my throat, trying to hide the way my eyes started to well. “Thanks, Cole.”
Tense silence brewed between us for a moment, both of us staring at the little girl on the floor like she was a buffer. Finally, Cole leaned in. “What do you have planned today?”
“Not too much. I have a test coming up this week for Econ. I’m taking a light course load this semester because I only have a few classes left, but I don’t want my grades to slip this close to the end. Probably just studying and hanging out with Em.” I arched my brow. “Why?”
“I was thinking we could do something, just the two of us. Alex is downstairs with Calla and Marta, and they offered to spend the day with Emilia, maybe get some of the baking done for breakfast tomorrow.”
“Oh!” I said, chewing on my lower lip. I was torn about what to do. Since I’d stepped foot into town, Cole and I had spent little time alone, always having someone else join us, whether it was Emilia, Alex, or Adam. In truth, I was nervous, not sure if this weird tension between us would just continue to rise or if we’d finally be able to move past it.
Adam’s words played out in my mind, reminding me to be brave. I came here to spend time with Cole, and so far, I’d made every excuse in the book not to. My days had been filled with familiar faces in town, and my nights were consumed by the handsome face of the actor next door. But if I ever wanted to make amends with Cole, I had to start somewhere, and he was here, begging for a piece of my time.
I nodded. “I’d like that. What were you thinking?”
His smile was wide as he looked back at me, “How do you feel about an old-fashioned fishing competition like when we were kids?”
I rolled my eyes as I took a giant bite of my treat. Fishing competitions were how my dad solved most disagreements between us, from who got to pick dinner to the one who had to help do the dishes after Thanksgiving. He’d take us out to a little pond in the back of their property, hand us a Styrofoam cup full of worms, and leave us to it. Whoever caught the most by nightfall was declared the winner.
It had been years since I’d been out, no longer able to visit that spot once I’d kicked Cole out of my life. But the idea of capturing that youthful magic made me smile.
“You’re on.”