Chapter 13
CHAPTER 13
RACHELLE
T heo appears at the head of the stairs, smirking as he sees my face.
“Oh good, the party is just getting started up here,” he murmurs. “I see a pretty little mouse caught in our trap. Nacio, I bet your sister is wet as fuck right now. Why don’t you check for us all? She came apart so pretty for me earlier while we were dancing. Moaned like a whore in church as she exploded all over my thigh. You should get to enjoy some of that.”
Ignacio smirks, moving behind me, his left hand wrapping around my throat and squeezing hard. It reminds me of the bruise that’s already throbbing from Theo’s bite mark, making me wince. The other guys are the ones who are typically rough with me, and I can’t help the squeak that comes out of my mouth.
“I behave myself at home because of my father,” he murmurs, kicking my feet to keep me from being able to stomp on his ankles. “I’m not a good fucking person, little sister. There’s no one to save you up here.”
His hand on my throat forces me to watch as Jared glances over his shoulder and slowly pulls out of Marci’s pussy so I can see how wet his condom wrapped cock is before slamming it back inside of her. Her scream is cut off because of Jared’s hand clamping on her throat, while I struggle to push Ignacio away.
She's completely wrapped up in the King that’s fucking her, his body blocking her from seeing anyone else.
“You’re the one who came up here, were an eager little slut and rode Theo’s thigh, and then squirted all over his pants. He had to come upstairs to change, isn’t that right, Theo?” Ignacio asks.
I can see he’s wearing a pair of joggers with a white henley t-shirt as Theo shoves his hands in his pants lazily. Shrugging, he says,“My pants were sacrificed for a worthy cause. Now, stop stalling. I didn’t get to enjoy watching her enough. I want to see her pussy.”
Theo leans against the wall where he’ll be able to watch everyone best, while my stepbrother pushes my skirt up until it bunches at my waist. I can’t say anything as his knuckle rubs over my panties. I’m sure there’s still a wet spot from earlier, and Theo is getting an eye full as his eyes zero in on Ignacio’s movements over my panty covered pussy.
My breath hitches from the small amount of air I’m able to get as Ignacio bumps my clit, my head pulled tightly against his chest so I’m unable to move very much.
“Fuck, she’s so fucking wet. I bet if I finger fucked her, you’d be able to hear it,” he says.
Even as I struggle to get away despite the immobility, my hips jerk forward as he continues to lazily rub my clit through my panties. All I’m doing is forcing him to completely cut off my air instead.
“Relax,” he whispers in my ear, his thumb rubbing over my wild pulse. Ignacio’s leg is pressed between my thighs, not allowing me to close them. I’m completely at his mercy right now. My emotions are high, my skin pebbling with goosebumps as their eyes remain firmly trained on me.
Marci may as well not be here at all, and I’m sure that she’s just a warm place for Jared to stick his cock because I didn’t come to find him. That was never my plan, though I’m willing to edge and tease them.
Maybe I'm too deep, flying too close to the sun, but there’s nowhere to escape now. All I can do is feel and attempt to stay in the moment. I’m on the razor’s edge between seeing Colton’s face and drowning in the sensations. What Ignacio is doing feels so good, yet I know I’m being used for their own amusement as Theo pulls out his pierced cock, leaning his arm on the railing next to him as he smears the precum over the crown of his shaft.
“Such a lucky girl, getting a show,” Ignacio croons in my ear, digging his erection into my ass. “Maybe I should fuck you up here and send the video to your mom, show her you’re not the innocent girl everyone thinks you are.”
“Every girl needs a sex tape,” Theo says with a dark chuckle, grunting. “It makes it so much easier to manipulate them. Ask me how I know, since it was so easy to make Miss Hailey do whatever I wanted to. Show me her pussy, Nacio, I need to see it all. Stop teasing me.”
Tugging my panties to the side, Ignacio spreads my lips wide for him. I want to scream, push my stepbrother away, but I can’t as Jared twists his body, turning so his back is to the wall to bounce Marci on his cock. Her head is thrown back, ignoring everyone around her, and I wonder how she is able to be so oblivious.
“Jared made her wear ear plugs,” Ignacio whispers in my ear. “She’s drunk and thirsts so hard for his dick that there could be tons of people up here watching and she wouldn’t notice. I have to admit, though, his dick is pretty amazing.”
I couldn’t respond if I wanted to as his thumb begins to slowly and insistently rub my clit again.
“Her pussy is fucking gorgeous,” Theo grunts. “I wonder how puffy it would get if she fucked us all.”
The images of them all surround me, but I don’t know how I feel about it, even as I moan as my thighs start to shake. I don’t know how he can get me going so quickly, unless it’s because I never really came all the way down from my last orgasm.
Theo’s hand tugs at the piercings that run down the shaft of his cock, grunting as he fists himself. The very idea of what that would do if he was ever inside of me makes me shiver as I moan.
“My sister is a whore even if she doesn’t have the experience it seems,” Ignacio says darkly. “I wonder how much abuse your cunt could take. If Elijah was up here, I would say that the birthday boy definitely deserves anal.”
My body freezes at the thought and I start to fight him. I’m not enjoying this anymore, and I’m definitely in over my head. Ignacio’s fingers spear my entrance, making me rise onto my toes in surprise. It’s too much, and tears threaten my vision.
“No, not again,” I whisper, my words barely audible due to Ignacio’s hand around my throat.
“Oh is the pretty little whore going to cry now?” Theo asks with snort. “Come get on your knees, and I’ll show you how I can make you cry while choking on my dick.”
Ignacio stills behind me, his fingers slipping out of me, and I let out a strangled scream as I manage to kick him so he’ll release me. Vaguely, I think about how easily he lets me go, but I need to get the fuck out of here.
I don’t think I’ll ever be normal, or able to let myself go in these fucked up games that the Kings play. I’m too broken, my mind too fractured from all the damage Colton did to me. Pushing down my skirt, I angrily swipe a tear away as I walk.
“Fucking assholes,” I gasp, my voice raspy from the excess of desire with no release. My legs feel like jello as I stumble over to the stairs, struggling to make my muscles work.
Elijah’s eyes are wide as I manage to start running down the stairs, watching from the landing as I try to push past him.
“What the fuck?” he whispers, and I guess my eyes look a lot more wild than I thought. I can’t get enough air, my fingers are twitching, but I’m not disassociating yet.
I just need to find Lili and get out of here.
“God, you’re such a nut case,” Elijah says, earning a place to release my anger.
I’m angry with myself, the Kings, and it doesn’t completely make sense as to why. All I know is that one moment I’m pushing past Elijah, and the next my hand is backhanding him across the face.
“Rachelle!” Lili yells, and I turn to see her walking up the stairs. “You took forever. Come on, let’s get out of here.”
Grabbing my hand, I follow her as we push through the crowd toward the door. Glancing over my shoulder, I see Elijah walking slowly down the steps, rubbing his cheek. As he catches my gaze, he raises his middle finger at me, eyes murderous before he disappears into the house.
The cool breeze on my face as Lili and I burst out the front door helps to interrupt my spiral, and I’m so grateful for it. The gates are open at the front of the drive, and there are expensive cars everywhere.
“What did they do?” she growls as we walk toward the car.
“It’s me,” I tell her, shaking my head. “I’m broken. I can’t do this.”
“I wasn’t there, so you need to explain what ‘this’ is, baby,” she says.
“I went up there to pee, and the floor was empty,” I explain. “When I walked out, Jared had his dick in Marci?—”
“If anyone is a whore, it’s those boys,” Lili says. “Only they use sex as a weapon. I think I was wrong to suggest that we do the same. There’s nothing wrong with you, they just don’t have a clue when things go too far. What happened after that?”
Lili pulls out her knife, flipping it as she walks, and I notice it’s an angry twitch. I wouldn’t be surprised if I’m the only reason she’s not returning to stab one of them.
“Ignacio pinned me in his arms and started to expose me to Theo. It’s like they all just decided to come up there,” I mutter.
“Or Elijah told them,” she sighs. “Tell me the rest.”
I explain the way the guys were teasing me, what they were saying, and what made me finally lose my cool.
“Ignacio is a dumb ass,” Lili mutters, unlocking the car. “I was really careful to make sure that fingers penetrating you wouldn’t trigger you, but he obviously did.”
“I couldn’t see him, so I started seeing Colton instead,” I explain, opening the door. The quiet whoosh as it lifts up settles me, knowing I’m getting the heck out of here.
“Are you sure I can’t go back in and cut off his dick?” Liliana asks as I get into the car. She’s settled in the driver seat, her knife back in its place, but I know she’d go back inside if I gave the word.
“I really want ice cream and to go to bed,” I tell her, closing the door as I pull on my seatbelt.
“That I can do. I’m officially calling this experiment a bust,” she says, turning on the car. “There has to be another way to get the guys to back off.”
As she maneuvers through the crowded driveway, all I can think about is the way Ignacio froze, as if he couldn’t figure out what he did wrong. Wrapping my arms around my body, I close my eyes, wincing as my panties chafe against me. I didn’t have time to fix them and it’s surprisingly uncomfortable.
I’ll be happy to close the door on tonight and never relive it. I don’t think parties are for me.
* * *
I texted Barrett when I got home on Sunday, asking him to schedule me in. I didn’t sleep well with Lili last night, and the nightmares crawled through my dreamscape, making me decide to stare at the wall for hours after I woke up with a swallowed scream for the second time.
Now I’m sitting in my room in a hooded sweatshirt and yoga pants with my door locked, waiting for Barrett to text me back. God, I hate depending on people. I really shouldn’t be this attached to my therapist.
A knock on the door makes me flinch, and I swallow hard before answering, knowing my voice is probably going to crack.
“Yes?” I call out, wincing as my voice sounds strained.
“It’s Emil. I just wanted to tell you that Barrett called me to confirm your appointment in an hour. I may have yelled at him and said that if you reached out for an appointment then it was up to him to confirm with you,” he growls, sounding pissed off.
“I’ve only been waiting three hours for a response,” I sigh.
“Three? Are you fucking kidding me?” Emil asks. “He doesn’t have that many clients. Would you like me to fire them all so he is at your beck and call?”
The idea is so preposterous, I find myself smiling. It’s the first time I’ve smiled all day, and I silently thank my stepfather. I’m on the struggle bus today. I can’t even read because nothing is holding my attention. My e-reader is full of smut, and my mind is still triggered, nothing feels safe.
I think Lili is rubbing off on me, because I’m cursing at the Kings in my head today. It’s not that I never curse, it just isn’t something I do easily, until now.
“I don’t think that’s necessary, but thank you,” I say, humor in my voice.
“You let me know if you change your mind. Have you eaten today?” he asks.
The concern in his voice makes my lip begin to quiver and I shake my head. “No,” I say, sniffing. God, the mood swings are enough to give me whip lash today. “I’m not hungry, thank you.”
“Rachelle,” he groans, hitting his head on the door. “Your mom is stress eating for the both of you right now. We’re worried. Did something happen with Lili?”
“Nope, she’s perfect,” I tell him. “I’m just having a weird day. I didn’t sleep well, and some awful stuff is coming up for me. It’s really just me.”
I’m the problem. Well, not just me, but my reaction to things that shouldn’t be triggering. If I were a normal girl, I may have been able to relax and let go last night, but I’m not and never will be. My scars find a way to show the outside world how fucked up I am.
“Okay,” Emil mutters. “Will you try to eat later, please?”
I doubt I’ll be able to after the conversation I’m going to have with Barrett…
“I’ll try,” I lie, not wanting to worry him. A tear rolls down my cheek, disgusting me. I hate that I’m all twisted up inside. I just want to feel normal.
I had that once, it’s just getting harder and harder to remember the girl I was before freshman year of high school.
“That wasn’t very convincing,” Emil says. “I’ll be downstairs if you need me.”
“Thanks,” I say, listening to him walk away, and then counting to twenty.
Sticking my head in the pillows, I scream, my hands fisting my sheets.
“I fucking hate this!” I yell, my voice muffled by the twenty odd pillows that I have on my bed.
The sound of the door opening and slamming into the wall makes me sit up and scream again, eyes wild as I look for the person breaking into the room.
“Fuck!” Ignacio yells, breathing hard. “Why are you screaming, and what the fuck is wrong with you?”
“You have a lot of questions,” I wheeze, my hand on my chest as my heart pounds. “None of them are any of your business. Last I checked, this was also my room. Get out.”
The adrenaline rush is really going to mess with me now, and I don’t want to look like a freak while I try to figure out how to regulate myself.
“I can’t do this today, Ignacio,” I whisper. “I really fucking can’t.”
“Dad is pulling his hair out, and I heard your mom crying when I was walking up here. Are you dying or something?” he asks.
“Or something,” I breathe. “I really need you to get out.”
“No,” he says stubbornly.
Outside of my window is a thin walkway, so I do what any self-respecting person in the middle of a meltdown does. I leave the damn room.
Getting up from the bed, I unlock the huge windows and pull them open, stepping up carefully onto the sill.
“Are you fucking kidding me? My father will murder me if you jump out of that window,” Ignacio growls.
“You’d deserve it after how you treated me yesterday,” I say, stepping out onto the walkway. It leads to a ladder that goes up to a terrace on the third floor. Apparently, no one uses that room, but I’ve been wanting to investigate it.
Freaking my stepbrother out while I do it will work just fine.
“Rachelle, fuck!” he hisses as I balance and walk along the narrow ledge. Poking his head out the window, he growls at me. Ugh, he’s a caveman, wonderful. “Why are you so difficult?”
“Why are you a douchebag?” I ask, grabbing the ladder to swing my foot up onto it.
“This won’t hold my weight, little girl, so I can’t catch you when you fall. You’re seriously pissing me off,” Ignacio says.
“Maybe next time you’ll catch a clue when someone says they want to be alone,” I say, but the words aren’t as strong as I’d like. There’s a tremor in my voice and I shake my head, mad at myself. For once, it would be nice to be stronger than the sum of my parts.
Because they’re all broken and fractured, showing me pieces that I don’t like very much.
“Why are you crying?” he asks, eyes wide. “God, is it something I did? I felt you freeze last night, I felt you start to lose your shit, but I don’t fucking understand why.”
“I was raped, Ignacio,” I say. “It’s really quite simple. When I can’t see who is touching me, my brain enjoys making me believe my rapist is holding me down. Also, being gang banged isn’t something that gets me hot and bothered. So excuse me if I can’t talk to you while I try to lock up all of my goddamned demons that the Kings let loose to play.”
Fuck my curse words. I don’t care anymore.
Climbing up in my socks, I think about how it would be just my luck if I fell. At least my brain would be quiet, there would be no more nightmares, and there would be peace. Swallowing hard, I look over my shoulder at the ground which now looks really fucking far down. I can’t hear Ignacio anymore, which means exactly nothing.
He could be telling Emil and my mother almost anything by now. His legs are so much longer than mine. Leaning back, I let the wind whip around in my hair. Intrusive thoughts are fierce in my mind right now, though I vaguely know most of them are lies placed in my head so I’ll let go, stop fighting.
It feels wrong that it is so bright and sunny in Portland today. The one day I’d prefer it to be stormy, it isn’t.
Hands clamp down on my forearms, startling me so badly, I let go of the ladder with a scream, looking up into Ignacio’s stormy gray gaze.
“You’re a pain in my ass, you stupid girl,” he snarls, lifting me straight up into the air. “You want to die? Is that what you’re trying to fucking do?”
Tears stream down my face as he tosses me into the air, making me shriek as he makes me believe he’s going to throw me off the roof. Instead, his hands close on my upper arms, pulling me closer to him. How Emil and my mom haven’t heard us screaming, I have no idea, and I half expect them to come running through the French doors to my right.
“I don’t think you’ll like any of my answers,” I rasp. “Do you want me to tell you I don’t hear voices that tell me to let go? Or that it would be easier to not feel as much as I do? You push, and push, and fucking push, Ignacio. You can only break something if it’s not shattered into a million pieces already!”
“Is that what you think?” he asks, his hand moving to rub his thumb across my cheek. Grimacing at the tears on it, he sucks it clean as my jaw drops. “One of the reasons the four of us are drawn to you is because to the outside world you look so damn happy.”
“Fake,” I mutter. “All the world’s a stage and all that jazz. No one needs the sad girl moving through their space, especially when it doesn’t look like there’s anything wrong with me. I live in a mansion, go to a fancy school, and all of my needs are taken care of. What do I have to complain about?”
“That’s the thing,” he says. “You don’t complain. I saw the way you looked when you let yourself glance down. Death is too good for you.”
“That’s sweet,” I say sarcastically, yanking my arms away. Carefully skirting away from the ladder, I drop onto a chair with bright yellow pillows. “I asked to be left alone.”
“Yeah, like I’m going to do that now at the highest point of the house,” Ignacio mutters.
“Moment’s passed for now,” I say honestly, drawing my knees up onto the chair with me to pillow my chin as I look out at the backyard.
Emil has a gorgeous garden here, and everything is blooming. I need to hold onto things that are pretty right now. Taking a deep breath, I try to find a way to center myself.
Not everything is as ugly as I think it is, I whisper to myself.
Closing my eyes, I shake my head as I see Colton’s face. Nope, that’s why that’s a bad idea. It’s why I can’t sleep. Blinking, I gaze out at the world outside.
This is safer.
“Why aren’t you sleeping?” Ignacio asks, sitting next to me.
I didn’t think I said that out loud. Wonderful.
“Nightmares,” I say softly. “Barrett is going to come looking for me soon.”
“I have more questions than ever,” my stepbrother admits. “Are you going to tell me what any of that means?”
“Nope. Don’t want to be hurt today, thank you,” I tell him, feeling myself starting to drift.
God, I’m having a really bad day. This is wonderful. I’m going to end up locked up.
Rough hands pick me up and drop me into a lap, and I jerk as I try to figure out what happened. Ignacio is glaring at me again, and I don’t know why.
“Focus, Rachelle,” he snarls. “No one is going to lock you up. You’re fucking scaring me.”
My fingers are twitching and I force myself to take a deep breath. If I’m saying things that are supposed to stay inside of my head, then chances are that I’m probably not doing a great job of that thing where you inhale to oxygenate your brain, either.
“I do a really good job of keeping it together,” I rasp. “Colton stole everything from me because he didn’t understand how to stay away. I’m seeing a pattern with the Kings.”
Tears continue to fall, and I ignore them until they hit my lips, at which point my tongue pokes out to collect it. They’re salty, reminding me of what hopelessness looks like.
“Rachelle,” my stepbrother begins, and I shake my head.
“What you did yesterday is no better than what my rapist did to me,” I hiss. “I’ll die on this hill, Ignacio. Go play your games somewhere else, because I want no part of it.”
“You were fine with Jared and Theo,” he insists. “I was fucking around with Lili and almost got my nuts cut off for my efforts, but I saw how you broke apart for him. What was the difference between that and upstairs with me?”
“I think it was because I couldn’t see your face,” I whisper. “My brain started to lie to me. I was convinced I had to get away when you shoved your fingers inside of me and started to talk about fucking my ass. It didn’t matter that you aren’t Colton, in my mind, I was thrown back to when the word no was ignored.”
“We’re a lot of things, even killers, but we aren’t rapists,” Ignacio insists. “My friends and I find a thread of resistance and pull and pull until the whole thing unravels.”
Gazing dispassionately at him, I let my hand rise and drop into my lap as if to say, well here I am. Unraveled.
“Kind of like this, huh? You fucking win,” I mutter. “Barrett is absolutely going to see me like this and tell your dad that he can’t help me. I’m a lost cause, Ignacio. Just wait for the men with the white coats, because I’m done.”
“Is this because you’ve been in a mental facility before?” he asks. “Yeah, we’re assholes who dig deep, little mouse.”
Pursing my lips, I raise my middle finger at him to show how much I appreciate his digging. Grabbing my finger, he sucks on it, allowing me to see that he doesn’t have a gag reflex.
“Cute,” I mutter. “Your sleepovers with the Kings must get really wild.”
Releasing my finger with a pop as it leaves his mouth, he shrugs. “About the same as your nights with Lili,” he says.
“This is getting us nowhere,” I sigh.
“Barrett is a shrink,” he says suddenly. “God, I don’t know why I didn’t realize this. I was too busy being jealous.”
“What?” I ask, shaking my head. I don’t understand what he’s trying to say.
Everything is hard right now.
“Listen,” Ignacio breathes. “I promise never to touch you like that again. I didn’t think about how I could be triggering you. I was too far gone by the time the words were out of my mouth and you were stiffening in my arms.”
“Look at this,” I mutter, pulling away the neckline of my sweater to show him the bruised skin from Theo’s bite mark. “You can promise whatever you’d like, but this will not end well.”
Standing, I sigh as I walk to the railing of the terrace, glaring down at the dizzingly far ground.
“Get away from the railing, Rachelle. Fuck, why do we have this open anyway?” Ignacio’s hard body wraps around me, his fingers digging into my hips. “What’s in your head right now?”
“It would be easier to end things now,” I sigh. “It’s early enough that Lili won’t miss me, and I’ll never have to deal with another nightmare, or worry that Colton will get out of prison early for good behavior.”
“Your brain is lying to you,” he says, burying his face in my hair. “She’d be devastated. Lili adores you, and if she hasn’t told you already, she fucking loves you. You need to fight, Rachelle.”
“Fight for what?” I whimper. “Everything is so hard. I can’t turn around without one of you assholes bothering me.”
“There’s a bet,” he says slowly. “I can’t stop that.”
“Then your words mean nothing,” I murmur.
“Why are you two out here?” Emil asks, the door swinging wide. “What’s going on?”
“Rachelle and I are talking,” Ignacio says.
“And?” my stepfather asks, walking out onto the long terrace.
“What would it take to kill Colton?” Ignacio asks.
Turning around as I ignore his fingers digging into my sides, I gape up at him. His teeth are gritting against each other, his gaze hard as he speaks to his father.
“He’s in prison,” Emil says slowly. “Are there concerns that he may be getting out?”
“No,” I bite out, almost too quickly as I sniffle. Too many tears means that my nose is also running. I’m sure it’s not a pretty sight.
“Liar,” Ignacio growls.
“You talk an awful lot,” I rasp, my voice cracking.
“Rachelle, talk to me,” Emil begs, trying to redirect the conversation.
“I’m sure I wouldn’t make any sense even if I tried, or I’ll say something that will just get me locked away,” I scream, my body shaking as I sob.
“I would never,” Emil says, shaking his head, walking closer to me.
“I tried to tell her that,” Ignacio sighs. “I’m not her favorite person.”
Emil smacks his son over the head, rolling his eyes. “That’s because you’re a dick to her,” he says. “I saw Rachelle’s door was open, and went to find her. If her door is locked, don’t pick the fucking lock, Nacio. How is she supposed to be able to find any safety if you’re breaking in?”
“I didn’t think about that,” Ignacio mutters. “How am I supposed to know that? Rachelle doesn’t fucking tell me anything!”
“You don’t deserve her words because you’re being an idiot,” Emil says. “Now, mijita, what did my son do to you?”
“I can’t tell you,” I squeak. I really don’t know what to say. It’s embarrassing and I haven’t the faintest idea what he’d do if he knew.
“That doesn’t sound good,” Emil growls. “Your eyes are puffy, but from more than crying. Why are you not sleeping?”
“Nightmares,” Ignacio answers. “I did something that caused them, because I didn’t understand her limits.”
Emil stills, pulling his gun out and shoving it between his son’s eyes. I stop breathing as my chest heaves, unsure what to do.
“Emil,” I whisper. “Stop.”
“Did my son touch you inappropriately?” Emil asks.
Panting, I put my hand on my chest, watching the way Ignacio’s arms lay limply at his sides.
“Yes, but?—”
“There’s no buts, Rachelle,” he says. “Your nightmares are triggered by something, right? How long has it been since you’ve had one?”
“I don’t know,” I tell him. “They haven’t been this vivid in a long time, though.”
“I fucked up,” Ignacio says. “There’s a bet and she’s marked. I can’t do anything about it, Dad. Even if I’m gone, they’ll continue with their bullshit.”
“Nacio, seriously? She’s who you chose for this?” Emil asks, shaking his head. “I want to fucking pistol whip you. ? Maldita sea!”
The other day, I looked up some Spanish words, which is the only reason that I know that he called me the equivalent of his daughter earlier, and just cursed his son out now.
I’m starting to hyperventilate quietly, overwhelmed and confused by this conversation.
“Promise me something,” Emil says. “You’re the only one who can make sure this doesn’t go too far.”
“Anything as long as I can actually physically do it,” Ignacio says, his naturally olive skin appearing pale.
I think he thinks the same as I do. Emil may actually pull the trigger. My stepfather is so angry his face is red, his expression stony with the refusal to bend.
“Two things. Nothing sexual,” he bites out. “I don’t know what happened, but the nightmares tell me her mind thinks you’re no better than that rapist who hurt her. I am deeply disappointed in you, Nacio.”
“Yes, sir,” Ignacio rasps, but I don’t know if he’ll be able to keep that promise. The guys are fueled by sex and fear. I don’t know if my traumatic experience makes it more fun for them to mess with me or not.
“If they kill her, I’ll slaughter you all,” Emil snarls. “No one will ever find the bodies. Is that understood?”
Oh my God.
“Crystal, sir,” Ignacio says, his breathing coming out sharply.
“Then we’re done here,” Emil says, putting the safety back on and putting his gun away. “In this household, we protect what’s ours. Rachelle, it’s time for your appointment. After that, we’re going to open up the discussion where you take my name.”
“We are?” I ask, my teeth chattering.
His eyes move over to me, and he swallows hard.
“Come here,” Emil says, opening his arms. I move so quickly, I slam into his body, and he hugs me hard. “I didn’t mean to scare you. My son doesn’t understand words without the threat of death on its heels.”
Nodding, I shudder as I continue to cry. Apparently, I should just get comfortable being a sad bitch today, because my eyes are going to be really swollen after this.
“We’re batting a thousand today,” Ignacio says, his hands shaking as he runs them through his hair.
“There’s not a lot that I can do to protect you from the boys at school,” Emil says. “I hate this part of our world, the secret societies, and the way the Kings work. As I said, I could kill them all, but?—”
“He’s your son,” I say softly, as if to remind him.
“Yeah,” he says. “As for the conversation I walked in on earlier, you’re having a really bad fucking day, mijita. Are there voices today?”
“You know about those?” Ignacio asks incredulously.
“If this gets back to your friends, I will give you the worst jobs possible, Nacio. Be prepared to drown in blood for days in the name of cleaning up the torture rooms,” Emil says, rubbing my back slowly.
Despite his words, I just want to take a nap. I’m exhausted, and for some reason, I feel safe right here.
“It won’t,” Ignacio promises as I yawn. “Well, mafia talk is already boring her. I guess she’ll fit right in.”
“Tired,” I admit. “I really didn’t sleep well, but yes Emil, there are voices today.”
“They’re liars,” he says simply.
Ignacio smirks because he said the same thing, and Emil slowly begins to walk me toward the French doors.
“I have a feeling my son may have told you that,” Emil grunts. “I don’t know if he said this, but I’ll repeat it anyway. You have such a strong spirit, Rachelle. I don’t know if you see it. I do, though. Demons tend to plague those that have the most to lose. A lot of people would miss you if you disappeared, even if we’re just getting used to having you around. Don’t let the voices win. You’re better than that.”
Together, we walk back downstairs, and father and son watch as I pass from sight through the office door where Barrett is waiting for me.
“Barrett,” Emil barks, making my therapist flinch.
“Yes, sir,” Barrett says.
“My daughter is having a rough day. I hope you’re prepared to spend as much time with her as she needs,” he says.
Ignacio crosses his arm over his chest, glaring at Barrett.
“Don’t be lazy and pass her off to someone else by bringing the white coats in,” Ignacio says.
I’m just inside the door, listening intently as I lean against the wall.
“Of course not,” Barrett says archly. “A locked facility is the last thing Rachelle needs. I’m not going to discuss anything related to her or her case with you though.”
“He may not be so bad,” Ignacio mutters as Barrett shuts the door in his face.
“I meant every word,” my therapist says, taking in my defensive posture. My hands are in fists, my lip being tortured by my teeth. “Let’s sit down and take it from the top, okay?”
Taking a breath, I nod and sit down, prepared to take the leap of faith I always do when I talk to Barrett.
Let’s hope he isn’t just someone else who lets me down.