23. Amelia
I'm not offended by Stefano's cold reaction this time.
Of course, he would be heartbroken. Of course, he would be angry and acting out. I never even knew he had a daughter - never mind the fact that he went through all of that pain, watching the disease eat away at her - holding onto the same hope I'm holding onto every day - but then losing her.
I can't imagine what that feels like.
I don't want to.
Stefano pushes past me to leave the office and I let him go. My heart is so heavy for him. I want to hold him, but I know it won't take the pain of his loss away.
I understand why he got so angry with the doctor now. It doesn't make his threat ok, but at least it makes sense to me.
He lost his daughter. And now he is watching Elle suffer through exactly the same thing.
Is Merelda the reason Stefano is so cold? Is she the reason he became ruthless?
I walk out of his office, wondering if I should go after him or give him some space. I decide he most likely needs space more than he needs me fussing over him.
So I head up to the bedroom, exhausted from work and feeling drained after the brief encounter with Stefano now. Hearing his story fills me with fear. What if I don't find a donor for Elle in time? I can see how weak she is getting. I can see how each day I lose more and more of her. Her body is failing, and she is in constant pain.
I dance between trying to prepare myself for the worst and not letting myself give up hope. Ever.
I climb beneath the blankets and sigh softly as I lean back against the pillows.
My phone vibrates loudly on the bedside table.
I pick it up to see a message from the lab. Matteo's report is attached to it.
With shaking hands I click on the file, waiting for it to download and open.
My heart is slamming against my rib cage, painfully filled with hope.
I click on the file again to enlarge it, zooming in the area where I know the results are given.
My eyes shoot open and instantly fill with tears; everything becomes a blur as a loud sob of happiness bursts from my lips.
Matteo is a match.
Matteo can be a donor.
I glance around the room, wanting to tell Stefano, wanting to share the overwhelming happiness. This is the best possible news I've ever had in my life.
But then I bite my lip and a frown knots my brows together.
I went behind Stefano's back when I asked Matteo to get tested. I made that deal with him to steal from the hospital if he was a match. Stefano will be furious that I did all of that in secret.
Fear creeps in when I think about his reaction.
He's already suffocating me, keeping me as a prisoner here. If he finds out I've been hiding things from him there's no telling what he'll do to me - or Elle.
He has the power to make our lives miserable.
I shake my head. It's better if he doesn't know. At least for now. Until I can organize everything.
Instead of telling Stefano, I message Matteo.
Me: The doctor just sent me the report for your tests. You're a match. You can be a donor for Elle. Will you come over? We need to discuss everything.
I stare at my phone, tensely waiting while he types out his reply.
Matteo: That's good news. I'll come over tomorrow evening.
Me: Thank you, that's great. See you then.
I lay back down in bed, wanting to scream with excitement, but I'm also filled with dread.
The surgery is a risk in itself. And Elle is weak. There is still a lot that has to be considered, but the hardest part is over. We have a donor.
At work the next day I'm struggling to focus and I'm relieved that we only have two very minor surgeries booked for the day. When they're done, I immediately go over to Elle's doctor to talk about what happens from here - now that we have a donor.
"Well, now we need to arrange for the surgery. I took the liberty of drawing up a quote for you so that you can get the funds together. We will need payment upfront before we book. Once they've given the go-ahead and everything is cleared we will book Elle in."
He hands me a piece of paper filled with medical codes and prices alongside each code.
My eyes scroll down to the bottom as thick dread sets in.
"That's the total?" I say in disbelief.
"Yes." His brows knot when he sees the look on my face.
"Is everything ok, Amelia?"
"Um, yes, yes, everything's fine," I say quickly. I don't want him to know that I don't have even a quarter of this amount. I have to go to the bank. I need another loan. They've already given me three towards Elle's treatment, but surely they'll give me another for her surgery. I grip the quote so tightly in my hands that I tear the paper.
Shaking, I straighten it out and fold it, slipping it into my handbag.
The bank refuses.
They tell me I'm already over-extended on my payments and I can't possibly afford another loan. I talk to the manager and he says there's nothing he can do.
I can't believe I've come this far, found her a donor, and now I can't afford the surgery.
I head back home, my head churning, trying to figure out how to solve this.
There has to be a way.
Panic has settled over me like a thick blanket by the time I get home. I don't dare go and see Elle in this state. I can't let it slip that I'm stuck. I want to break the good news to her - but I don't want to tell her anything until I'm sure it's all one hundred percent going to happen. I can't do that to her.
Stefano is in the kitchen and I hurry past him, not wanting him to see my face or ask questions that I don't want to answer. I can't deal with him now.
I run up to the bedroom and fight for control over my emotions.
Sitting alone in the bedroom I nervously dial my father. I know what Stefano said - I know he threatened to kill me if I ever contact my parents again - but I have to try.
I have to do this for Elle.
The phone rings once before my father answers, sounding tense and upset.
"Amelia, why are you calling here?"
I keep my voice a low whisper.
"Dad, we found a donor for Elle. She can have the surgery, but I need money. I can't afford it."
"Amelia." His voice is heavy with regret. "If I help you, he will kill us all."
"If you don't help me Elle might die."
"I'm so sorry, sweetheart. You are going to have to find another way. I know you will figure it out. You have to. Please don't call again. I love you both."
He hangs up the phone and I stare in disbelief at the disconnected call.
Never in a million years would I have expected my father to say no to his granddaughter.
It just goes to show the fear that Stefano sets in the hearts of people around him.
I'm fighting tears, a losing battle when I hear Matteo's voice calling from downstairs.
"Amelia - are you home?"
I hurriedly brush the back of my hand across my cheeks.
"I'll be down in a second," I call back to him.
In the bathroom, I quickly splash cold water on my face, but it does nothing to hide the heavy dark circles and puffiness around my eyes. They are red and swollen from crying.
I sigh. What does it matter anyway? Of course, I'm upset. Why should I hide it?
I pull Matteo outside to the patio where we can talk in private.
He takes one look at me and tilts his head sideways. "I thought you'd be celebrating, but it looks like someone killed your cat. What's going on?"
"I got the quote for Elle's surgery. It's way more than I can afford. The bank refuses to give me any more loans and now I feel like I've come so far only to hit a brick wall." I start crying again, embarrassment staining my cheeks red at the same time.
Matteo pulls me into a hug. "Stop this. I can help. I have a team of private doctors who work in that business I told you about. They will help. Elle will get the surgery she needs. I promise you. You have nothing to worry about, ok?"
Inside the house, through the glass of the massive patio doors, I see Stefano walking past and I quickly step away from Matteo.
I'm taking stupid risks getting his help.
But what else can I do at this point?
I'll do anything for my daughter, my beautiful child. She doesn't deserve any of what she's going through, and I have to do whatever it takes to save her.
"You'll ask them? And let me know?" I ask Matteo, referring to the doctors he says work with him.
"Yes. They'll help. Definitely. I don't even have to ask. I'll just make the arrangements and get back to you. Anyways. I've got to get going. I have a late meeting now. I'll be in touch. Don't worry, ok."
He reaches out and squeezes my shoulders gently.
I bite my lower lip. I am worried. I will continue to worry until Elle has the surgery.
Matteo leaves and I'm left standing out on the patio alone. Again, I'm fighting tears. The stress is too much to handle.
I feel so close and so far away from the goal - from saving my daughter's life.